The tranny thoughts are starting to fade. I don't know exactly why or how, but they seem to be weaker by the day.
Weirdly enough, it seems that started when I got more independence from my family by opening my own bank account (even though there's barely any cash in there lol)
Based on that single shred of evidence, I have come to the following schizo conclusion: Trannyism (at least in my case) was caused by being possessed by both the anima and the puer aeternus archetype at the same time.
I grew up without a good father figure (biological dad bailed and I just never liked my stepdad), and the female figures in my life were overbearing in some regards. I never went outside to play with other kids when I was young. At first, I thought this was because I was simply a loner, but the more I think about it, the more I realize my mother had a very tight grip on me at that age, possibly giving me a fear of getting hurt or worse.
Without a male figure to show me the ropes of being a man and how to leave the embrace of the mother, I became dependent on her for everything. I basically did no chores growing up because she never really asked me to do anything boring or uncomfortable (which is biting me in the ass now because I need to learn everything at once).
Due to this, the anima got stronger, and my animus (logos?) was severely weakened (anima possession or inbalance in the soul). Because I did not do anything I didn't want to do, the reality of the world did not set in fully, I never left the metaphorical womb. And so, I became a childish being of dream, but not action (puer aeternus archetype).
The thoughts of wanting to be female likely came from two things: The fact I sought comfort in the mother, and the fact the I like to embody parts of the people I like in different ways.
So, the cure lies in being responsible for myself.
It will be hard, considering I have no one to be that father figure I never had, but I gotta try.
sorry for the blogpost