My dad used spank me with several stuff: hand, flip flops, shoe, magazine rolled up as burrito, clothes hanger, belt.

At the age 10 i stop giving a shit and i stop crying for the pain, i just accept it.

Now as adult i just noticed i can't fall in love with any woman and im not able to love anyone. I feel sexual arouse beating women into bdsm shit, im not antisocial, so everything i do is with consent.