Today I got help putting up a piece of furniture on the wall (a long cupboard). The heat last night made sleeping near impossible so I had some energy drinks to get myself through the day. I havent really had energy drinks before, but my digestion has been struggling with tea lately and I cant drink coffee anymore, so I figured maybe this would be an alright alternative.
But…
I might have overdone it. I’m feeling pretty anxious right now and I cant really tell whether it’s the caffeine or the stress of having family over. Maybe it’s both. My head wont stop worrying that the cupboard is going to fall off the wall. It’s big and heavy and I guess the thought of having to clean it all up and how the crash would make noise bothering my neighbours is… I mean I know it’s probably because I’m worried about life, in general, and this is a nice tangible physical object for my fear to direct itself towards instead but. Man.
The thought of something going wrong again is enough to make me want to cry.
I guess it’s because it’s a small victory that took a disproportionate amount of effort to achieve. But when you’re not really used to victories lasting winning gets kind of scary.

I’d better see if I can calm myself down now.
Take care /sig/