Are there any ways to cope knowing you're becoming an adult when you don't feel ready for it yet?

I've been a NEET ad hikikomori for many years, so this year I tried to be someone and tried to go college but flunked out 2 months after starting the freshman year of CS all because of crippling anxiety.

I've returned to this shell kind of being, where I'm useless in every single responsability, chores, financial, romantic. I need to get my shit straight because I've thinking of suicide lately but I'm not a fag and that response would be cowardly. I know I can only help myself, but I'm so unprepared to normal adult life, I feel like I was born just last month and barely learning on how to do things.

Any help?