I never thought I’d be writing something like this, but here we go.
My girlfriend (now ex) and I were together for 10 years. We were a good couple, I was going to propose to her eventually (we were together since high school). But for a long time, I’ve had this fantasy about seeing another man with her. Maybe it's my fault but I really wanted to see her getting fucked by a black man. Call me a faggot or cuckold whatever, but seeing her getting fucked by an another man, especially a black man, it’s like the acme of lust to me. The peak of everything forbidden, humiliating, and yet intoxicating all at once.
2 days ago, I finally brought it up the topic to her. I told her I wanted to “add some flavor” to our relationship, and I suggested this guy (let’s call him X) I knew. I told her I wanted him to fuck her in front of me.
At first she thought I was joking. But when she realized how serious I was, she literally punched me in the face and just left.
She stormed out, packed her stuff the next day, and I haven’t seen her since. Blocked me on all apps. Ten years gone in less than 24 hours.
Now I’m sitting here trying to figure out if I completely ruined my life over a fantasy I should’ve just kept in my head. Part of me feels like I betrayed her trust. Another part feels like this kink is such a deep part of me that it was inevitable it would come out eventually.
What would you do, Anons? Should I just date American women instead?