It’s been a strange journey to the point I’m at now. The last oneitis gave me visions of satan or some other demonic presence offering her love for the tribute of 3 birds or 1 dogs life. A bargain which disgusted me to my core, and yet I still clinged to her hopelessly. Never bargaining with the demon, and in turn never being her love.

From first encounter with the new oneitis instead I’ve been stricken by a sickness, horribly weak and completely bed bound. Do the demons demand another tribute? What will I have to bargain this time? Is it worth it now? Every dream this week has involved her, yet no demons have come to bargain.

From that realization I see the truth clearly now. No path which would lead me to an angel could be guided by anyone but GOD himself. Only faith in HIM will bring me to her who my heart aches for, her who would make a great wife, a great mother, a great companion by my side.

This is no curse of a demon, this is a trial by GOD to seek faith for faith in HIM will lead all to the desires of the heart. Faith in HIM and love for the future to be unfold with her will guide me to find her once more. To give me one more chance to ask her out when I lacked the courage to do so before.

No matter what if I place my faith in the LORD almighty he will grant me the courage I never found within myself. What courage forms within will only reflect what faith I send above.