It's not my dad's fault his son is a faggot

I'm starting to like my life. I'm poor, live in a shitty village in south america, unemployed and broke, take meds for depression etc. but I somehow find subjective experience good. I think part of me likes even some of the negative stuff. And even though it seems that the world is going to hell... I feel hope that things will get better.

I'm gay (not openly tho), and no man has ever found me attractive or wanted anything with me, only a few girls during high school. What does that mean? I'll never have a boyfriend?

I want one.

Ugly ass nigger attentionwhore with shoulders bigger than most cismen.