>>82328914
fuck you've got it similar, but worse than I do. my gramps was paranoid schizo who also had full-blown schizoid tendencies since his 20's afaik. dude lived god knows where, off the grid almost until his death. never met him either, but some members of the family say they see alot of him in me including his social outlook, yearning for a nomadic lifestyle, and intelligence. my mother was next in line as a paranoid schizo and fully developed it during her 30's. she taught me more about religious conspiracies and how to live off of the land, rather than how to function on a basic level in modern society. TL;DR, it's bleak, and it seems I've been purposefully geared up to repeat my gramps' story.