>>41501275
> indulging your wants
Shoulds and wants are something we're speaking about with my Other Half, but it's easy for me to identify shoulds but hard to identify wants.
> If you think yourself the sole architect of your misery
Since I don't have to be in unsafe places, it's really hard to blame anyone else but myself.
> I ask you to be lenient enough to squeeze more productivity out of yourself.
I think I'm being too lenient with myself as is. I need to be actually more productive in stead of less so.
>>41501287
> One thing that may need checking is whether you are neurotypical or have, say, ADHD.
Isn't adhd something that'd start in childhood? As in adults can't have it? I was a straight-A student but then I never needed to study, either. Also being put on tranquilizers, antipsychotics, and literal meth and locked up in a psych ward would not be experiences I'd want to experience right now.
My remaining family would be overjoyed, and an extra psych eval or clearance flag isn't something the part of my family that could still serve need right now.
> That is, ways to sabotage you from doing it.
Internet addiction is tricky desu, since I can't pull the plug (can't work), can't dns ban myself (my work pc has news sites and wikipedia), and even if I do, I just start making the code better in stead of actually working and researching methodologies.
> Remember, it is objectively better to do 30% 100% of the time than to manage 100% 10% of the time.
If I can do 100%, why should I settle for less? For me, what's hard in exercise isn't following through, but taking the first step or first pedal turn.
> Of course, that would require you to enjoy the process and not hate the end result for being flawed..
Writing. Even if/though I enjoy worldbuilding, making an actually coherent story in that world shows my lack of imagination clearly. And in drawing, I'm even worse.
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>>41497153
Probably you are >>41486387. Maybe not.The guy I'm answering will get it.
I live in Hungary (bojler eladó), and when he went to bed it was 2340 hours here. What he wrote... deserved more than what I could do half asleep on a phone.
>>41490567
> but don't alot of men just...
I really, really hope you're not speaking (purely) of experience, or at the very least what you said was not one man you know. I'm glad that you still seem to believe in people though. And also that you're still doing "uwu therapy" in stead of blowing your phallo/FMS/car... whatever fund on ponies, booze and coke. If you ask me, that's the non-masc thing but what do I know. I'm just a mtf.
But I see where you're at. Tumblr coping can only get you so far. At some point, you just have to bear it, like a man. Just like you wrote.
The difference is: Some have the option to share some of that weight, some others believe they can't. The latter is the more dangerous, especially when they think... see above.
> Your brothers beating the fuck out of each other.
Even raised as a male I never got that one. So I was just waiting for the storm to pass, you got in to the fray. And you didn't write "your brothers were beating the shit out of you", and you wrote "you're less strong than you were in abusive places". Maybe it's a curated image. It sounds too detailed to me to be fake, but don't tell me you're fembrained or weak or lazy or whatever. From what you wrote... you aren't and you have the drive - even if it's dysphoria, or being perceived as "male light" to improve. Every fucking day.
Probably you are >>41486387. Maybe not.The guy I'm answering will get it.
I live in Hungary (bojler eladó), and when he went to bed it was 2340 hours here. What he wrote... deserved more than what I could do half asleep on a phone.
>>41490567
> but don't alot of men just...
I really, really hope you're not speaking (purely) of experience, or at the very least what you said was not one man you know. I'm glad that you still seem to believe in people though. And also that you're still doing "uwu therapy" in stead of blowing your phallo/FMS/car... whatever fund on ponies, booze and coke. If you ask me, that's the non-masc thing but what do I know. I'm just a mtf.
But I see where you're at. Tumblr coping can only get you so far. At some point, you just have to bear it, like a man. Just like you wrote.
The difference is: Some have the option to share some of that weight, some others believe they can't. The latter is the more dangerous, especially when they think... see above.
> Your brothers beating the fuck out of each other.
Even raised as a male I never got that one. So I was just waiting for the storm to pass, you got in to the fray. And you didn't write "your brothers were beating the shit out of you", and you wrote "you're less strong than you were in abusive places". Maybe it's a curated image. It sounds too detailed to me to be fake, but don't tell me you're fembrained or weak or lazy or whatever. From what you wrote... you aren't and you have the drive - even if it's dysphoria, or being perceived as "male light" to improve. Every fucking day.