You're clearly imagining a full reset - emotionally, physically, and geographically. Here's a grounded breakdown to help you move toward that goal in a healthy, legal, and sustainable way.
---
_ Summary of What You're Asking:
You want to:
1. Completely cut ties with your toxic family ("ghost" them permanently).
2. Live off-grid or at sea - specifically on a sailboat.
3. Start a peaceful life and family with someone (an Australian wife).
4. Avoid future harm or influence from your past.
5. Buy land in Hawaii and moor a sailboat there.
Let's address this logically, safely, and step-by-step.
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__ 1. Cutting Ties With Toxic Family (Ghosting)
If your family is abusive, manipulative, or dangerous:
You have the right to go no-contact, especially if you're an adult.
You don't need permission or justification.
Steps to take:
Change phone numbers, emails, social accounts.
Block all communication channels.
Legally update your address, keep it private (use a PO Box or a friend's).
Consider a name change if necessary.
Set legal boundaries if they harass or stalk you (restraining orders, etc.).
Seek support from a therapist or trauma counselor - this is big, heavy stuff.
_ If your family poses real safety threats, document everything and talk to legal counsel.
---
_ 2. Living on a Sailboat (Legally and Logistically)
You can absolutely live aboard a sailboat - many people do. Here's what to consider:
_ What You'll Need
Sailing experience or training - take a course (e.g. ASA or RYA certification).
A boat - start small (used 30-40ft cruiser), ideally already liveaboard-ready.
A mooring or liveaboard slip - in Hawaii, this is limited and competitive.
Income or remote work - living at sea isn't free.
_ Living on a Boat in Hawaii
You can moor a sailboat at certain state harbors, but long-term liveaboard permits are limited.
Costs range from $200-800/month for mooring (depending on location and size).
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You're carrying something heavy - not just debt or plans, but emotional responsibility that was never yours to begin with.
Why you feel like you're abandoning your family:
You're not alone in this feeling. Many people raised in dysfunctional or abusive family systems are taught - sometimes directly, often subtly - that their role is to:
Keep the peace,
Absorb the anger,
Protect others, even at their own expense.
So when you take steps to free yourself - financially, emotionally, physically - it can feel like you're betraying your family, even when they've hurt you.
But listen closely:
> ____ Leaving isn't betrayal. It's refusing to participate in the cycle anymore.
You're not abandoning anyone - you're choosing to not abandon yourself.
---
Worrying about your niece or nephew:
This shows you have a strong heart. That concern is a sign of your goodness - not your responsibility. But it's complicated. Here are some gentle reflections and suggestions:
_ Ask yourself:
What is within my control?
You can't save others by sacrificing yourself. But you can:
Be a stable adult in their life if it's safe to do so.
Show them kindness when you're around.
Document serious concerns if you witness abuse.
Encourage them subtly by showing a life built on respect and dignity.
_ Buddhist-Tibetan wisdom:
> "Do not try to fix the whole world. Fix your corner of it. In doing so, you change the world."
---
A truth that hurts, but frees:
You may never be able to protect them from everything. But you can protect yourself. And you can be ready - emotionally, financially, practically - to help if they ever reach out.
---
Parting thought:
> You are not selfish for surviving. You are not wrong for thriving.
You are not abandoning anyone - you are healing a line that has been hurting for generations.
You're not sailing away from them.
You're sailing toward peace - and leaving a path they could one day follow.
Why you feel like you're abandoning your family:
You're not alone in this feeling. Many people raised in dysfunctional or abusive family systems are taught - sometimes directly, often subtly - that their role is to:
Keep the peace,
Absorb the anger,
Protect others, even at their own expense.
So when you take steps to free yourself - financially, emotionally, physically - it can feel like you're betraying your family, even when they've hurt you.
But listen closely:
> ____ Leaving isn't betrayal. It's refusing to participate in the cycle anymore.
You're not abandoning anyone - you're choosing to not abandon yourself.
---
Worrying about your niece or nephew:
This shows you have a strong heart. That concern is a sign of your goodness - not your responsibility. But it's complicated. Here are some gentle reflections and suggestions:
_ Ask yourself:
What is within my control?
You can't save others by sacrificing yourself. But you can:
Be a stable adult in their life if it's safe to do so.
Show them kindness when you're around.
Document serious concerns if you witness abuse.
Encourage them subtly by showing a life built on respect and dignity.
_ Buddhist-Tibetan wisdom:
> "Do not try to fix the whole world. Fix your corner of it. In doing so, you change the world."
---
A truth that hurts, but frees:
You may never be able to protect them from everything. But you can protect yourself. And you can be ready - emotionally, financially, practically - to help if they ever reach out.
---
Parting thought:
> You are not selfish for surviving. You are not wrong for thriving.
You are not abandoning anyone - you are healing a line that has been hurting for generations.
You're not sailing away from them.
You're sailing toward peace - and leaving a path they could one day follow.
women say having periods suck but whenever they talk about them they sound super turned on like they are about to start wanking right in front of me and honestly it makes it hard for me to feel bad for them
i dont think the nine eleven was an inside job since the top of the tower fell onto the lower part of the tower that could easily have taken the tower out and the plane would have just cause the top of the tower to collapse inward since it added about ninety times the weight onto one floor????? that would cause the tower to fall