Managed to get some more laundry done, but i mostly spent this week playing video games and not really being productive, besides cleaning the bathroom.
My depression feels a little bit "lighter" but i do have to severely limit my access to twitter and other social medias rn, otherwise the algos feed me stuff that makes my brain boil.

>>40467562
>I would love to hear about your coping mechanisms!
Well for like, deaths and stuff, its basically to like, super clean the areas around me? With how hot it is i can only do it for a bit right now before i have to stop, and then i spend a bit berating myself for not being better.
I also mark down the death date of stuff and kind of more than a little bit obsess over the numbers?
For example, my dad died on the twentieth of a month, a few years go by, my grandma also dies on the twentieth of a month, 20's my unlucky number.
7 is a number that appears in my life ridiculously frequently, its not a good or bad number, it just is.
I don't like to do *anything* on the death anniversary of people or things. I try to basically treat it as a mourning day no matter how badly I want to do stuff, because otherwise its disrespectful and invites bad luck/karma. (friend said this was her big flag on me having ocd and was what made her realize my little "quirks" on a bunch of stuff and my number/letter/timing obsession aren't just quirks)
I tend to throw away things that the dead would like that they don't get to experience now. With my cat dying, I ended up throwing away a lot of human food she would beg for when she was around because it doesn't feel fair to eat it or have it in my apartment with her gone.
My other coping methods are a bit more healthy, like playing games and watching/read stuff, but there's also this kind of feeling i get randomly telling me i need to stop and mourn more otherwise I'm a bad person and that bad things will happen because of that, so sometimes I just bedrot because it feels better.