I've been relentlessly wanting to transition ever since I've found out it was an option to begin with. I would immediately chose to be a woman if I could, and seeing woman around my age only ever fills me with envy and sorrow.
And yet, I don't feel any dysphoria in relation to my own body, or how I am perceived.
Do I have a masculine face? Yes, it is what it is.
Do I have a masculine frame? Yes, it is what it is.
Do I have a masculine voice? Yes, it is what it is.
Am I being seen as a man by everybody else? Yes, and again, it is what it is.
If I desire to be a woman so much, why don't I feel more dysphoria? Why is it so easy for me to just not care about all of this?
Is this just radical acceptance? Am I dissociating more than I realize? Or am I simply just completely faketrans?
The lack of dysphoria makes transition seem like an objectively insane thing do to. Despite wanting it, it feels like there's nothing for me to gain from it. Quite the opposite actually, transitioning will undeniably make life harder, and for what? Soft skin and gyno?
I'm aware of how insensitive this is, but at this point I wish my dysphoria would be worse, so that I'd feel like a transition would be justified
Why is my dysphoria so weak??
