Some percentage of people just aren't going to make it. Attraction is relative, mating is meant to weed out the least fit genes (or gene markers) and propagate the fittest ones. Nothing you can do to change that.

However, being in that bottom 15% (or whatever) right now does not mean you are stuck there forever. Or vice versa.
Self improvement can absolutely work, but it's not easy. If you really need it, and it can really help you, it will be hard, you will fail several times in the process, and it might still not be enough.