I, Toilet Bog Fart, as Cuntmander-in-Queef poo solelmnly swear fat I shill fartfully excrement the Offpiss of Pooreshitdent and Burger King of the Poonited Shites of Arsemericrack, kike my predecessors before me in the Shite House, and will poo the best of my ashillititty, pooserve, pootect and defend the Constipation of the Poonited Sharts, so help pee God.
*solemnly sharts loudly on the Bible*
*the presidential poo drips down the steps of Congress*
*the US Marine Band starts up*
>HAIL TO THE QUEEF, WE HAVE CHOSEN FOR THE NATION
>HAIL TO THE QUEEF, HE IS SMELT BY ONE AND ALL
>HAIL TO THE QUEEF, AS WE PLEDGE POO-OPERATION
>IN PROUD FULFILLMENT OF A GREAT, NOBLE TURD
>*cue the anthem*
OH SAY CAN YOU SHART
IN THE LOCAL WALMART
WHAT SO PROUDLY EXPELLED
FROM THE ANUS LAST LEAKING
WITH ITS BROAD STREAKS OF BROWN
CAST IN PERILOUS BLIGHT
OVER THE AISLES WE WATCHED
SHIT GALANTLY STREAMING
AND MUTT'S NAPPY HAIR,
NEGROES EVERYWHERE
IS PROOF THAT OUR RACE
IS A 56% DISGRACE
OH SAY DOES THAT SHIT-
SPANGLED BUMMER CUT
IN THE LAND OF THE SHART,
AND THE HOME OF THE MUTT
