There is a spoiled scene-girl inside my brain that wants to feel like an ornament at the center of the world, surrounded in tactile pleasures of various kinds. She goes away when I exercise or otherwise assert myself as a man in the world, but comes back when my energy is depleted to take what's left. In moments when I feel weak or like a crudely drawn portrait ready to be thrown in the garbage she demands to be seen, to feel beautiful and adored. For an affirmation that she belongs in the world and there are people that want her there still. Sometimes this feeling just leads me to extremely distracted, dissociated states where I have either withdrawn to watching shows, playing games, or looking for artwork I find beautiful. Other times I look for audio porn or crossdress.

Is this what Jung called anima possession? Did the ghost of my aunt who died in my childhood bedroom mantle her, and form two hypostes of a personhood/tulpa? I don't necessarily want to make her leave, but the long retreats into myself really takes up a lot of my time that I need to develop into a better person living in the world. I know I need to assert myself with "action-without-reflection", touch grass and all, but I want to be careful not to lose touch with the Anima which seems to be a part of this thing if not it in of itself.
Mainly just looking for thoughts, advice, or a kick in the ass.
Inb5 >OP is a faggot