i already know i'm probably going to kermit at some point so my dream in life is to be "adopted" by a guy who'll basically let me stay in his house 24/7. bonus points if this happens via slow and subtle social manipulation over the course of months. bonus bonus points if he doesn't mind my mental illness and social failings. ideally we'd live in some cabin out in the woods and work on a little cute homestead together. he would take care of all the household duties that come with being a man while i would garden, cook, clean, and etch talismans into the outer walls. by day i'd forage for herbs and mushrooms in my spare time and by night we'd have awesome sex or something idk i'm a virgin. we'd cuddle on the couch reading hanya yanagihara together. this thread has an evil aura so i refuse to leave my contact here but i hope me posting this somehow manifests a morally dubious man into my life. love you all