>>82783413
>like nails on a chalkboard
don't think i could've explained it any better! but it's not impossible
>kind of uhm "frozen" or a bit zombie-like?
im not sure, maybe? i feel more vulnerable, so to speak. it's like im in a dark room and my only light just got snuffed out. so now all i can do is stumble alone in the darkness.
>that would help
i think it would too, really i do. being retarded is a blessing after all! i guess.
>take you a while to get into gear
i can't remember too well how i was before i reached my breaking point. i think after getting off that roof it took me about a month to mentally prepare myself to get ready to do things. and whilst i was ready, it still took time for the opportunities to arrive (or to be created by me), so i don't think i actually did anything until february.
>god gives his hardest battles to his best soldiers
god could kindly stop doing that any time he wants!!!!!! PLEASE
>memories are a precious thing
funny, im pretty sure a few threads ago you mentioned a photo album and you wanting it to be empty... though i get why you'd say that yes. it's painful to think things were better before and now they're awful, but i think it would be even worse if things were never good to begin with.
>these threads are like your diary
they are, yes. i can look up how i used to think, at least up to 2024. i have changed a lot since then... thankfully...