Turning 40 soon and contemplating what to do with the rest of my life. I come from a lower class family. Became a workaholic myself, and spent my whole life building up a career. Went from actual $0-1M twice and lost it immediately both times (once a bad business partner, again on stonks). I’m exceptionally skilled as a developer, but haven’t been able to find work for a few years now. I’m tired of always working on projects or trying small businesses that don’t pay off. I’m at a do-or-die crossroad, and I find myself starting to plan for the worst. I figure, if I wasted my youth and am destined to bag groceries till I’m 80, I might as well sell everything, move, and do it somewhere a lot nicer than where I live. I used to feel reluctant to move because of family/friends, but ever since Covid my friends have drifted away until there was only one left, and I feel tremendous resentment toward my family for only accepting me when I had money, and constantly badgering me to go get *any* job in times I was not so fortunate. I’m not a bum. I do no drugs, don’t smoke, and even drink, and I never have. I’ve always been very straight edge and healthy, and tried to share that with as many people as I could.

I would have liked to have a family of my own, but I don’t think that’s likely anymore. I just don’t want to live a life of regret. More than anything, I just wish I could go somewhere I am appreciated. I’ve always gone above and beyond for the people around me, but it is never reciprocated. It was a real wake up call to go through severe depression and not even have my parents notice. I can’t do that kind of relationship anymore. I would rather be completely alone. I have beaten myself up for my mistakes every day for years on end. I don’t need other people to do it for me.

Have any anons given themselves a fresh start somewhere? What was your experience? Where did you go? Did you end up happier?