How can I get my wife more into control/dominance without discomforting her? Lets be straight: I have a fullblown submission kink and I love dominant woman. She knows I'm into "bdsm" but other than some slaps on my butt during sex she never really got into it. No knowledge about it either. And that's fine, I don't want her to be my femdom mistress wearing a leather outfit or such. I know in the end that's more a harm for a relationship as woman naturally prefer dominant men. Luckily, my presence is quite dominant and we have lots of good vanilla sex. I tried it in the past like "lets do orgasm control and only you decide when we have sex and wether I'm allowed to masturbate" and she played a long for some time. But eventually it disappeared again and she forgot about it.
To my advantage she is of Japanese origin and in her family always the woman took over the finance management. Meaning she has a look on all income and expenses and tells me where I should spend less, etc. "No you can't buy a new video game, you already bought one last month". That turns me on like nothing else lmao. And she likes to have the control but obviously not in a kinky way. I'm overthinking now where else she could control to our advantage. Because that way it won't hurt our relationship dynamics, she is motivated and I'm horny. Triple win.
One idea in my head is something again with scheduled masturbation (like once a week only) and no more porn. Could work with an app that notifies her or such. Again not too much effort but I have a hard time finding a story to convince her into it. If I simply ask her because it's my kink she would play along again but after a few weeks there is no more motivitation for her to continue..
