>>723049598
>Be me, conquering the shuto expressway
>porsche long in the tooth, starting to struggle to keep up
>Done all I can to it, head over to guy people call a legendary tuner
>says he can make my car crazy fast, for a price
>do it
>30 minutes later
>"Alright its done, you should have no trouble hitting 200mph+ now"
>Holy shit
>"Just, uh.... be careful with the throttle"
>fire it up, set off gently
>stalls as soon as I let off the clutch, wtf?
>start again, more gas
>coughs, sputters and stalls
>once more, floor it
>car reluctantly begins to move
>get on the highway
>2000, 3000, 4000, what the hell?
>suddenly the engine surges and tires scream for dear life
>barely stop the car from jackkinfing into traffic
>head back to PA, gotta find that fucker and get my money back
>nowhere to be found, just a note on the bench
>"No refunds ¯\_(ツ)_/¯"