>>40869672
i never really fit into male spaces, and even after transitioning mtf there was always a disconnect with women; i was still putting on an act and feeling kinda disingenuous. just as i was when i hung around men, but not to as serious a degree. even if my body was more aligned and i could actually walk outside and talk to people and have fun now, i could never really call myself "woman", even if thats what the world generally sees now.
when i was a kid i would get really infactuated whenever id see gnc characters on tv, or id make up stories and headcannon certain characters as male+female just because it made the most sense. it probably started then.