Have you ever wondered why atheists are so Hell-bent on convincing themselves that they are monkeys? My guess is that they need to believe in this notion in order to absolve themselves of morality. If you are just a monkey, you can sin as much as you want and it doesn't mean anything. It's just acting like the animal that you are.

>be me
>new coworker sucks, annoying loser
>stick it out for three weeks
>this morning, pray to God that he puts it in coworker's heart to quit
>in Jesus name I pray amen
>6 hours into the shift coworker comes to me and says "Alright [redacted], I quit."
Your move, atheists. Pray tell, how do you explain that one?