>>41010764
Yeh. Its a fucked up situation (and let's be clear, I havent been a saint in all this, either). The relationship is dead as a doornail and I'm just trying to set up a situation where I feel safe dropping papers.
I knew it was near the top of the year when I came downstairs to find him holding a bottle of pills and writing a suicide note because he thought I was about to break up with him. The first thing I said after calming him down was "you realize the kids would have found you in the morning, right?" That thought sits on my mind a lot and is a huge driver for me trying to take a delicate approach. The cut needs to be decisive, fast, and safe - then he can do whatever he wants after his Mom has drug him back to her house...
So its not like there's any chance of me staying. But fuck does it hurt knowing what's in store. I wish I had someone - anyone - to hold me through all this. But just like the rest of my fuckin life, Im the pillar.
Fuuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhh
Dont be like me, kids.