Orthodox Jews expect a Mashiach, but I don't want to do it. I don't want to accept the title. The world should be done without a Mashiach. But remember me as a wild person who was all over the place and could do anything. People have egos and they feel hatred towards a Mashiach. It just doesn't work. The only way it works is by the Mashiach pressing down upon everyone else using force like an authoritarian, which will make me more hated, and that's not what I want to feel. I just wanted a simple life with a wife and two kids with high school lovers.
I'm all over the place because I don't know how to keep it together. It's time for me to leave. The Jews can find another false Mashiach and make it work well enough. I'm just too weird.
