Mitch’s Birthday edition

News:
www.tsn.ca

Previous
>>149192802

happy birthday, mitchell!

>>149202954 (OP)
>>149202954 (OP)
Perfect
>>149202954 (OP)
>>149202954 (OP)

>>149202954 (OP)
Mitch isn’t real retard

This is what (((Gary))) took from us

>rags

wondering how pissed off mcd is right now

>>149203021
That's why his kitchen looks the way it does, neutral colors calm him and help him relax

>>149203021
Is he allowed to be pissed when he’s been one of the worst players in this series?

>>149203000
Shit teams for retards? Dont think thats changed

Why was the camera just perfectly ready to film that guy pulling the Oilers jersey off? Was he paid to do that? We are getting into WWE territory here. It's all rigged.

>>149203072
The Stanley cup final logo on the ice

>>149203021
Legitimately
I feel bad for the femboys of edmonton after last nights game

>>149203081
It’s a humiliation ritual so I’m sure paid actors are a must

Does Knobhead get yeeted when they lose again?

>>149203083
Don't pull that veil of mystery back too far or you'll see the passionless, cold core of the Universe and go crazy like that little kid in The Jaunt

>>149203081
see
>>149203132

https://x.com/abendytendy/status/1934087007413887062

mcgaykid is finished

>>149203166
MCMUFFIN BTFO

PINK PONY CLUB
I'M GONNA KEEP ON DANCING AT THE
PINK PONY CLUB
I'M GONNA KEEP ON DANCING DOWN IN
WEST HOLLYWOOD

>>149203166

>THIS IS OUR GAME

AHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA
Get fucked leafs

I don't even care about the Panthers.
But they are team America now!

I hope Trump tweets "This is our game" when they win

>>149203187

>>149203112
The roster is more to blame. Reminder that the last three GMs are an incompetent pro-rape nepotism hire, McD's agent, and an old guy who won his cups because no other team did serious European scouting in the 90s.

>>149203081
Gary wants to normalize buying multiple jerseys

>>149203021

>>149202954 (OP)
>>149202954 (OP)

3-0 was just a cat and mouse game.
you really thought the soilers could win the cup? lol

This Panthers team is a well oiled machine.

>>149203187
>>149203208
>5 year old song about being a fag in Hollyjew picked up as the Oilers anthem three rounds into the playoffs
Is Canada like those remote tribes in the jungle that's 500 years behind on technology?

peeden

Honestly feel like the Soilers will have a bounce back game, they always seem to. The 2 day rest will do them wonders, they looked fucking gassed yesterday.

>>149203296
Nah this iteration of the Florida Panthers will not allow them back into the series this time.

>>149203296
especially mcdavid and draisaitl

Reminder that Nurse is being paid almost 10M every year until 2030 and Bouchard will get a contract that's about 8M

>>149203345
reminder you don't know puck
so keep yapping ya twink

Crazy looking back at how many comments there were saying “oilers in 4”

Delusion is not just a creek in Alaska or whatever the saying is

>>149203362
I'm saying that those are great contracts and basically discounts because they are phenomenal defencemen

A smile on my face ever since I checked the results this morning. The Oilers are so done

>>149203409
That was just reality till people remembered the refs pick who wins

>>149203362
but he knows business
see >>149203419

If Israel needs me I will answer the call

>peeden

Kinda hungover bros so I’m drinking a homemade electrolyte drink and black tea :)

DQA blizzards for all my hoc frens

I never drink while browsing /hoc/. Why dull my senses in such lovely company?

I only post off topic and/or song lyrics in /hoc/ when I’m drunk

>>149203496
Dont think youre in any position to throw stones about the browns

I genuinely don’t think I’ve ever posted about something specific to hockey in /hoc/

I only shitpost when I post on the hoc

>>149203639
>tf
Ya we know

I haven’t been to DQ in 20 years.

>>149203081
Nah I think he just suddenly realized it is not his game.

Is 2025 a good draft class?

>>149203639
me neither. i just love annoying people.
i don't really care about hockey that much since to me it is like a war, like politics, someone always loses and we can make fun of the losers. and it never ends. there will always be losers to make fun of. this is so awesome.

>I love being a shithead
whats wrong with people?

>>149203000
>coincidentally when the nba had the same controversy

>>149203719
I also shop on all fours in revealing clothing

for example i always keep a mental image of the players i hate. and the oilers are full of them. nurse is a fucking annoying prick and kane isn't much better, corey perry the loser, i want him to lose another final, then that uppity ex-bruin douche frederic... who else?
and the kitties? i hate marchand but there are actually some players there who i love. tkachuk, barkoff... who else? anyway. i am rooting for the maximum butthurt. go matthew and brady!

>coping already

>>149203784
That's rich coming from you

it goes in the family!
if you hate on them you are just jealous!
i wish i were friends with brady. he seems like an awesome dude.

>>149203848
Im a pleasant individual

>>149203879
Please deez

>>149203846
Memer McGaykid is not 3Cupsney Thiccsby

>>149203879
Show me your most pleasant posts.

>>149203846
I wonder if Crosby ever feels insulted by the comparisons

>>149203495
If Israel needs me, I'll be in the ANGRY DOME!!!
>hold all my calls

>>149203603
You're very talented

How old is mcdavid now? He should just retire right now before game 6

>>149203904
Probably

Okay, let’s take a deep breath here. The Oilers are down 3-2 in the Stanley Cup Final, and I’m not gonna lie, after Game 5, it’s hard not to feel like the series is slipping away. The team has been up and down—winning Game 1 in overtime, losing a close one in Game 2, getting completely blown out in Game 3, pulling off a miraculous comeback in Game 4, and then… another blowout loss in Game 5.

dropping a disgusting marner

>>149203989
Oh yeah I just realized the >soilers haven't won in regulation yet in this series. What a fraudulent ass team.

“Pressure is something you put on yourself when you don’t know what you’re doing.” - Sid Crosby

VS

“Right fucking now! RIGHT FUCKING NOW! I’m not fucking around—this happens so many fucking times! But that’s not fucking good enough. Dig the fuck in—dig the fuck in!” - Connor McDavid

Paul DeadPuck Maurice
Boring and effective
We are not entertained.

So Garry is moving the LA Kings to Canada after the protests across the country?

>>149204046
This really highlights the difference between having autism and having a personality disorder

>>149204030
Are we still gonna call them Marners when he signs with his new team or was that a >laffs specific thing?

>>149204046
Both are/were faggots desu

Okay, let’s take breathe deep here. The Oilers are 2-3 in the Stanley, and I’m not gonna. After Game 5, it’s hard to like the series. The team has been down—not losing Game 1 in overtime, not winning a close one in Game 2, getting completely in Game 3, pulling off in Game 4, and then… not winning in Game 5.

>>149204046
I wonder if he's really like that in the dressing room or if Gary and Bezos just told him to put on a performance for the documentary

The only reason the soilers have not been eliminated yet is that they somehow won two games. If not for those two random wins, they would have been swept in 4.

I think if the panthers can win the next game they’re gonna win the cup desu

Will McDavid blame the passengers?

>>149204164
I didn't buy that performance, I think it was for the movie. Everyone knows Connor just sits back in his stall and reads his magazines no matter the result

>>149204234
Yeah

>>149204234
All the best $12+ million captains blame their league min depth. That's just good leadership.

>>149203846
This gives me hope...!

thinking about girls butts

>>149204069
I am

>>149204154
Next time read what you wrote back to yourself before hitting post.
Keep trying. English is difficult. We all think you can do it!

>>149204378
Based. Ruben the benis too?

>>149203081
The Oilers jersey has a SCF logo but not the Panthers jersey. This guy is a Panthers fan. He bought his Oilers jersey before the game just to troll. I can't explain why the camera is on him at the right moment.

>>149204422
Nah

All signs point to the Oilers winning the Cup.

All signs point to you being a retard

Thanks for noticing.

YouTube not allowing adblockers is bullshit which is why I switched to brave browser. I will never ever pay for the luxury of not seeing ads desu.

Huomenta from the best coast

Though I will say all of my predictions for these playoffs have been accurate thus far. That must count for something. I'm not an insider or anything like that. I just know how hockey works. Definitely still a retard though. Go Oilers.

>>149204547
ublock origin still works for me on firefox. every six months or so i'll get the popup saying adblockers aren't allowed but it stops after a day or two

>>149204564
>wake up
>remember Alberta exists
>day ruined

I'm having some DQ because their roids make me shitpost better.

couldn't think of anything to my dad so an amazon gift card it is bro's

The extra hit on Perry after the goal.
This is /our rat/.

Dude Dairy Queen fucking rocks!

>>149204069
Sunny beaches, landfills, and the everglades...
The HOME of championship hockey.

lads how do you deal with the sinking feeling that you just aren't as important to someone as they are to you

I think Florida fucking sucks!

>>149204592
I used edge with a bunch of adblocks and YouTube came up with an error message desu

>>149204662
Couldn't give any less of a fuck

>>149204662
quit being a bitchnigga

>>149204662
I remind myself they are a professional hockey player and they literally don't know I exist.

thinking about /hoc/ butts

>>149204449
Retard

>>149204662
Crying episodes.

>>149204662
It's not a sinking feeling, it's the most positive attitude a man can have toward others.

>>149204776
You want this bussy?

>>149203000
our jewish heritage?

>>149204424
>implying that isn't one of Gareth Bruce Bettman's interns
I bet Gary's Secretary even gave that dude the company credit card to make the jersey purchase
>for tax purposes and such, it could be construed that it was for the programming, and Gary don't wanna deal with the IRS

hell, i used to be you

>>149204975
so black

>>149205047

KOBE!!!

>>149204975
We will forget Marchand was ever a Bruins.

Every game feels like Edmonton is fighting for their lives while the Panthers seem pretty chill.

>>149205127
Two varieties of "Been There Before" in full display, frankly, and it's a great watch for students of the game, legendary rerun Stan Lee action
>Hail Gary

>>149205087
Not me, dude... the riot in Vancouver is a historical landmark
No one's going to forget he was there

waiting for my coffee to cool down

>>149205286
Me, too
man, we have a lot in common

Yanks be like:
>Yo Cody! Imma jack off real quick. Got my lube, tissues, moisturizer, soft skin cream, anti inflammatory paste, bottle of water and deodorant ready. Yeah Dr. Grubelstein-Moneygrabber did not go easy on me haha.

>>149205194
Two varieties of "Bud Won" in full display, frankly, and it's a great watch for students of the game, legendary rerun TRB Lost action
>Raped

>oilers got beaten and bloodied so bad in game 3 that they just stop hitting and fighting all together

>stephen says this is the worst draft in history
>islanders get 1st overall
>it suddenly becomes a good draft

>>149205434
Enjoy your special day, Mitch
>You deserve it
How does it feel to be 27 years old?

>>149203268
We're clearly getting kiked harder than your Somali-Islamo fascist state is Svierge

>>149205380
Wanna make out

trannybros you can pay mercedes monke $100 a month to be "text buddies" with one of her assistants texting you back

>>149205523
What the fuck are you taking about

>>149205530
don't remember stuttering. nyla has aids

>you will never eat blizzards with brad marchand
life just isnt fair

>>149205543
What the fuck are you taking about

>>149205497
No, but thank you asking first, and also, would you tell me what your favorite cologne happens to be?
>I'm a complete sucker thierry mugler's angel

>>149205572
I don’t wear cologne

in high school me and my buddies wore axe body spray

>>149205581
That's a shame, "Angel" is guaranteed pantie remover
>I miss clubbing at Panama City Beach, but I'm too old to party with college chicks now

Series is going to game 7 just for the oilers to lose 9-1 at home or something insane like that because lmao

>>149205645
history in the making
>McDumbkid forever enshrined in the Hall of Shame

>>149205620
giwtwm

>>149205620
I’m never around women so I don’t have a reason to wear cologne

>>149205674
You wish you were clubbing at PC Beach? Or you wish you were that can of Stella Artois between her thighs -_-
>supple

>>149205645
That would be the ultimate and final cuck

>>149205695
Also a shame, but I won't criticize
I'm a solitary creature myself these days

>>149205702
stella

>>149205746
copy

I wish I were a pretty girl

>>149205702
should be obvious
do you seriously think anyone here would want to be you

>>149203000
Why would they have that when they can fill that space with more advertising?

tbph, this series ending as a loss for Edmonton, in either game, is going to feel crushing, and I don't envy Albertan Oiler fans

>>149203878
How come when my boys and I pose like this all close and whatnot, people call us faggots?

>>149205741
There’s only 3 other guys in my office and I don’t have a gf

Looking forward to drinking a few beers and listening to the Abbotsford Canucks radio call at 4pm for Game 2!

>>149205783
Gary would like to offer you a position as a low-level gopher in his marketing department
> It's not a proper internship, so there's no lunch service, and you don't live in the intern dormitory

>>149205572
this shit is gold

thinknig about cups

>>149205772

>>149205770
you CAN be one bro

>trbs new gimmick is to call anyone he's mad at "mitchell"
what does he mean by this

(((>>149205783)))
Spoken like a true big nose

>>149205770
Absolutely no one has the right to stop you or your flowery, girly ambitions, Susan
>Kimberly? Amber??

just read the script. it's going to game 7 overtime win for Oilers at home.

>>149205812
cause people are all stuck up and defensive about sex, even when they're not having any

>>149205813
I get the impression from all the sociology articles I go through that hermitism is on the rise, and that makes me wonder if rich people are going to get into the habit of having a "pet hermit" living on their property
>I would like to be Mike Tyson's hermit. I'm actually planning on moving down there in the not-too-distant future.. I could set my hermit shack up next to his tiger habitat, provided that one of those is a full enclosure

>>149206032
Oilers looked pretty demoralized in their post game interviews. Doesn't seem like they have another meme OT win in them to force game 7

>>149205912
noted
>>149205954
oh man, such a Mitchpost

>>149206247
plenty of down time to change the attitude in the lockerroom

>>149203090
i'm beating the missus even harder if the oilers lose game 6 lads

>>149206220
raped

there are zero (0) hockey games this evening

>>149206220
bitch

>>149205620
hey this is my pic, i post it in /brit/ all the time as an irish flag

>>149206452
Incorrect, two and quarter bong

I'd rather not have sex at all than having sex with any of you. Just saying. No homo.

>>149202954 (OP)
who is mitch?

>>149206545
Is it because of my cologne? man, that shallow of you

Fun fact: Jack Daniel's is made in Lynchburg, TN.
This is our game.

>>149206591
He's our friend, and it's his birthday

>>149206665
so another schizo /hoc/ character made up by trb? i should have figured

>>149206591
First name Mitchell, last name 1.

Edmonton's lack of depth and their atrocious goaltending is why they lost this cup. Removing Kapanen from the lineup for Arvidsson and not capitalizing off the home crowd killed them

Florida wins game 6 4-2. Conn Smythe goes to Bennett. Somewhere there will be retards upset over State Taxes when the reality is Bill Zito and Florida's ownership have done more to support than Panthers in four years, than everyone else in their entire existence

>>149206658
I haven’t been able to find Jack Daniel’s since the tariffs hit. Been on JP Wisers since.

>>149206727
if i was god i would make frotting less of a sin than anal

>>149206522
And the grand prix starts in 7 mins

>>149206728
This is terrible. Do you usually get most common stuff like KY bourbons, Buffalo Trace, Wild Turkey, Evan Williams, Makers mark, 4 roses, etc?

>>149206728
The only better choice was probably Crown Royal of 40 Creek, good selection

>>149206851
Man, what an action-packed Sunday; the only way this day could get better is if it were my birthday

>>149206681
yeah he spams it to whoever bullies him for being trb kwab

idk why tony refused to whack ralphie for so long. he really could have put pontecorvo on the esplanade. things wouldnt have gone bad with johnny, and tony wouldnt have to worry and paulie going behind his back no more.

This free agency class is also one of the worst in recent memory. If you give Marner up to 14M then get rid of the salary cap at that point.

>>149207068
for me it's meadow and adriana

holy shit did you guys see hank kill tuco???

>>149207147
meadow was fine. finn was a lucky guy. adriana? to quote our friend from overseas (who whacked the mayor of munchkinland) - not sama do much.

>>149206851
I thought he was sitting too but dang he is short

McDavid and Matthews walk into a bar.
The bar is empty just like their July schedules.
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA

>>149207068
He really never had the makings of a varsity boss.

Auston Matthews and Connor McDavid walk into a bar.
Bartender says, Sorry boys, we don’t serve Stanley cup winner drinks here.

>>149207239
You can do better

>>149206727
Time leading in this series is:
Florida 149:37
Edmonton 33:51

>>149207302
They both look at each other and excitedly exclaim, "that's perfect!"

Auston Matthews and Connor McDavid walk into a bar.
McDavid sighs, At least I showed up a bit in the playoffs and didn't blame the passengers. Matthews replies "Yeah, but your Cup dreams got iced faster than my beard grows!"
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

>>149207302
>Auston Matthews and Connor McDavid skulk into a local tavern.
>Bartender says, "Sorry boys, I don't have enough champagne to fill that Stanley Cup"
[post edit feex]

Auston Matthews and Connor McDavid walk into a bar.
The bartender looks up and says, "You two again? Shouldn’t you be in the playoffs?"

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA

Auston Matthews and Connor McDavid walk into a bar. The bartender ignored them because he was watching the Stanley cup parade in Florida.

Conn Smythe winner Brad Marchand

>>
> Auston Matthews and Connor McDavid walk into a bar wearing full kit uniforms and carrying hockey sticks
> A post-season hockey brawl ensues that engulfs the entire neighborhood and requires calling in the Mounties to support local law enforcement

Auston Matthews and Connor McDavid walk into a bar. Chad Marchand ducks beneath it and scores another SCF goal.

>>149207558
Bombston in ruins

Auston Matthews did very well in school because he never had to take a final.

Mitchell lost tbg won.

The zoomer hockey generation lacks heart that boomers like Marchand have.

one and three-quarters bong until leg 2 of the Calder Cup

Auston Matthew and Connor McDavid walk into a bar. It is a gay bar, they like men.

Connor McDavid walks into a bar and yells at the bartender, "whatever the fuck you have! right fucking now!". The bartender draws his gun and shoots him. McDavid sighs, "not fucking ideal. happens every fucking time".

>>149207599
>be bombston
>fire cassidy because of the emotionally stunted zoomers
>he wins the cup immediately after
>trade marchand
>he wins the cup immediately after
KWABOTD

>>149207558
they'll give it to bennett but that would be the funniest shit ever
vancouver, toronto, montréal, edmonton
this guy kills canadian teams in the ploffs

Since rape is inevitable, soilers should just relax and enjoy it.

>>149207599
the bruins were atrocious this year and probably will be next year, might as well trade him while he has value

Will the Oilers dig in on tuesday?
>they won't

Connor McDavid walks into a bar and says, "OW!! What hell is this bar doing here? I didn't order any new construction."

skarmklipp

Connor McDavid is in the trenches of the Somme and hears the drumroll of the German artillery. He says to his battalion, "DIG THE FUCK IN! DIG THE FUCK IN! RIGHT FUCKING NOW!" and no one listens to him because he's a bitch and they all die but not before he gets fragged by some teenager with shellshock.

Imagine being Mitch and getting utterly btfoed by tbg on his birthday.

McMeme signs with Toronto
Mitch the Bitch signs with Edmonton

Neither wins a Stanley Cup in their careers.

>>149204424
literally shidded and farded and cummed in my pants when this happened

me personally? my opinion? sure here you go. mcd lacks the balls to move onto another team. he'll cope on with the oilers for the rest of his nhl career.

Would you agree that an easy sweep would have been better for the soilers' and their fans' mental health? Toronto fans are basically numb and apathetic at this point. They are more sarcastic than hopeful. But the edmonton crowd and that fat cup lady are going to commit massive suicides. It is not even funny.

>>149207239
Everyones schedule is empty in July

>>149208134
>month of jew lie

>>149208134
I’m going to India in July

>>149208132
>>149208132
>Would you agree that an easy sweep
'No'

>>149208197
Gross

BRIEF HISTORY LESSON:
The months of July and August are named after Roman figures. July was originally called Quintilis, meaning "fifth month," and was renamed in honor of Julius Caesar after his death in 44 BC. August, originally Sextilis, meaning "sixth month," was renamed in 8 BC to honor Augustus Caesar, the first Roman emperor.

>>149208197
prepare to eject james bond style.

>>149208253
Wow thanks for the history lesson numale
(Didn’t ask though)

>>149208253
oh no no no

>>149208220
he is so jewish it is mental
how does he manage to look so jewish?

>>149208197
There’s no place like home.

What will McDavid do after losing again? How long until an American team picks him up?

>>149208132
>that fat cup lady
BELIEVE!

How does FL keep turning out the best teams year after year?

>>149208253
y'all do be dumb and no notin' 'bout this here juneteent

>>149208220
He looks like he could be Owen Benjamin’s father, and come to think of it they’re both from New York

Either Gary comes right out and hands soilers the game, or they get raped into oblivion for 60 minutes.

>>149208389
Can she sing? That's the real question. Is she going to sing?

>>149208366
>>149208283
>>149208248
India hate is overdone and dry.

>>149208132
They will forget about it a week after and start looking forward to the next season of their favourite franchise's hunt for a Stanley Cup in competition with 31 other franchises.

>>149208389

>>149208499
Good afternoon sir

>>149208543
Sherwood park is worse than India Mitch.

>>149208414

>>149208499
>overdone
just like the "meat" in india
>dry
unlike the shits you'll have in india

any indians in the NHL yet?

>>149207842

>>149208623
Zayne parekh Kevin bahl. They seem to all play for the flames.

>>149208560
> Two-fifths of Indians are vegetarians because of religious restrictions

If the Conn doesn't go to Drai, the leaves will shid and fard and riot.

>>149208641
>Parekh is of Indian and South Korean heritage
holy yikes
that's rare

florida should unleash bulju for the final game so he wins the cup before mcmeme

>>149208712
Women of all races love Indian men. We’re overachievers and handsome.

>>149208623
I saw one in the AHL this year. Dont recall the team though, hope that helps

>>149208729
kek

>>149208641
>Bahl was born on June 27, 2000, in New Westminster, British Columbia, Canada[36] to father Jonathan.
>to father Jonathan (full stop)
>no mentioning of the mother
wtf

>While growing up in Mississauga, Bahl originally preferred to play soccer but switched to ice hockey after a head-on-head collision with another player during a game

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA

PWHL draft prospect Chanreet Bassi :)

>>149208773
are you actually indian? say something in indian
except for benchod bloody fucking.

>>149208729
He's busy winning Calder Gold for Norf Carolina raht nah
>y'all

>>149208822
Part jeet and his dads name is Jonathan? Im thinking Jonathan banged a pajeeta who had to hide from her family

>>149208773
>overachievers
At my work we hired a temp that was here on a student visa and extended to work in his field of study. He was a lot of things but overachiever was not one. Arrogant is a better descriptor

>>149208867
My parents speak Urdu

>>149208882
>Jonathan banged a pajeeta
This is fucking uniquely rare that every time that happens they produce something noticeable like a high level athlete. Hmm.

>>149208704
Neat.

>playing bloodborne for the 50th time while I wait for ice puck
yep, they just don’t make em like they use to

What smells like curry in here

in hindsight should the oilers have started skinner last night?

>>149208969
somebody's lunch, probably

>>149208915
urdu is pakistan , yes?
and it is basically the same language as hindi except for the more persian vocabulary and the arabic alphabet.

>>149208996
Who?

>one and one-quarter bong

I hate on everyone no exception. I can hate all I want on Corey Perry or marchand and it is 100% acceptable. But when I hate on Nurse or some indians than it is racist?

>>149209156
Yes chud

>>149209156
Correct, srr

In what order will leaf franchises be dissolved?
1. Jest
2. Ottawa
3. Calgary
4. Edmonton
5. Vancouver
6. Toronto
7. Montreal
Should be over in 2038 or so.

>implying that you have an existential requirement to be a racist bigoted shitbag
Let's hear your position on this matter, Sir

>>149208996
but in hindi sight, they should have signed more indians

>>149209223
why would they do that?

>>149209255
We'll need separate national leagues after Donald installs the Wall
>there is a Northern Section being planned right now, plus coastal installations

>>149209239
>t. reddit: the post

>>149209255
Those franchises are not competitive, and revenues drop precipitously.

>>149204662
lmao who the FUCK cares, what do you want from that other person? money? pussy? love? like who cares, stop trying to be a people pleaser and live your fucking life you stupid sack of shit

>>
>but in hindi sight,
[what you did there]

>>149209333
He ran on building a wall in 2016, I don't think that was executed very well. What makes you think he will accomplish building one on a much much larger scale? He cant personally benefit from it so I dont see it happening

>soilers

>>149209428
>Sardonicism is form of wit or humour, where being sardonic often involves expressing an uncomfortable truth in a clever and not necessarily malicious way, often with a degree of distrust or skepticism; or behavior disdainfully, cynically humorous, frequently based on scornful mocking.
>source; dude trust me

>>149209512
Sardonic is some big slow croatian guy like Hamonic

Why bomb russia and iran? Bomb canuckistan and NHL headquarters 24/7, and hockey will thrive.

>>149209657
the Gary Armed Forces will crush the Western Empire and free the world from the Great Satan, inshallah

>>149209657
NHL HQ is in New York so you're gonna be bombing your own city

>>149208915
You have to go back. Hockey is not for you, fucking shiteating pajeet

>>149209747
>when it could be "Our Country" -_-

>>149209773
this

Gary :D

>>149209773
Cool it with the anti-Edmonton remarks.

>>149209819
Already made the proposal map.

>>149208969
your neighbor

>>149209657
we should bomb the cartels. and deport deport dpoert

How will YOU be celebrating Canada Elimination Day?

>>149210121
I'll be posting on /hoc/ with my /hoc/ friends

Top 5 Whiskey Brands world wide:

1. McDowell’s No.1 (India)
2. Royal Stag (India)
3. Officer’s Choice (India)
4. Imperial Blue (India)
5. Johnnie Walker (Scotland)

>>149210121
Have a half day of work, take a nap, wake up, jerk off, have some dinner, mix some drinks, play some xbox and pass out around 3am for work the next day. Or what I call, "Tuesday"

>>149210162
I don't think we are at the friends step yet

>>149210245
I thought you were my girlfriend :(

>>149209871
Real thanking hours over here

>>149210167
I tried to pour a shot of whiskey into my mango lassi once, it was grim

The fine print: Most Indian "whisky" isn’t whisky by Western standards. Many are made from molasses, and other cheap shit, then flavored and colored to taste like whisky. And these top brands are not really known outside of India.

>>149210285
:/ let's not put a name on it yet

>an entire summer of this shit

>>149203202
Remind me of the nationality of every player that scored last night

>>149210167
I'm sippin on a fine single malt off the island of Jura right now. Was about 280kr/~$30.

Dear Jeremy,

I think I like boys more than girls, but I'm afraid of people making fun of me if I express how I really feel. What should I do?


Connor M.
Edmonton, A.B.

>>149208623
carey price, ethan bear, tj oshi, jordan tootoo

>>149202954 (OP)
>doxes a guy who doesn't post here
>happy birthday!! XD
get cancer and die you fucking mentally ill shithead

>>149210733
You started this gimmick Mitch

>>149210513
Get ready for the most 1993 posts you've ever seen
Also, 1993.

>>149210861
you are a 45 soon to be 46 year old failure. you have no friends or family and your legacy is being known as the raped bitch

>>149210977
lay off the dillies mitch

what do jujhar and arshdeep drink?

>>149207884
too much controversy surrounding samuel even though he clearly deserves it, league is trying to phase out players like him
marchand has had flashier moments and a better narrative

>>149210977
He was raped by a community college kid that carries dolls with him, no less.

https://youtu.be/54oAN_QcySM
it's up desu

>>149208712
He buys his kimchi at a gas station

>at the bar slooting it up
>nice buzz going
>see attractive hockey player
>he shows interest in you
>immediately decide to cheat on your bf
>go back to hockey player’s hotel
>have sex
>he asks if you can service his buds
>you like this guy and you want to be an NHL wag so you agree
>attempt to sloot it up for them but feel humiliated when they don’t really want to have sex with you and laugh and point at you as you masturbate in front of them
>get teabagged
>they leave
>embarrassing but it made the hockey player guy happy
>worth it.png
>he immediately asks you to leave
>whoops
>realize you just got played and used
>lawsuitincoming.jpg

We all agree that’s what actually happened.

>>149211571
I stopped reading after the attractive hockey player wasn't a girl

>>149203264
He knows how to grease a squeaky wheel no-whut-em-sayin

HAIL BETTMAN!!!!!!!!

* judge disagrees and you're all guilty *

Paul Maurice walks into a bar.
That's it.

>>149211774
Nah the Judge was felting prosecution everyday it’s acquittals all around

>>149210581
No, first you have to do the Truffle Shuffle

tampa bay lightning

>>149211711
You need to have gender dis and latent homosexuality to relate to trb posts

Stephen is a lolcow who doesn’t even have his drivers license and works at carnival. Tbg is a military man who actually served his country.

>>149211988
Wait, he works at a carnival? Is he on booths or rides? or food? or does he vacuum clean the shithouses??

>>149211914
why does she wear the mask?

>>149212077
4U

>>149211988
Was he a comfort boy for the Pashtuns in Afghan ?

>>149211988
>he was willing to die for jewish interests
yea, real virtuous

>>149211988
bud is an amusing guy, bit of a dork but still kind of funny. trb doxes people he doesn't know because he's an unlikeable shithead
>>149212108
kek

>>149212130
>>149212108
Which one of you two is Mitch?

>>149212231

>>149212231
hey fat man, no one's buying your shitty vpn antics anymore

>>149211988
What’s wrong with working at the carnival?

>>149212301
Too much travel

>>149212288
No vpn here lad people are waking up to Mitch’s shitty antics.

>rags

>>149212340
Lose some weight.

>>149212288
i dunno, it's kinda funny if you're into ironic humor
>>149212301
Nothing, someone has to do it, and I enjoy the carnival, or used to when I was younger, and still went to things like that

>>149212071
star of the freak show

>>149212402
Yeah, it’s one of those things that’s not actually funny


> Like a sad clown slipping on a banana peel of sadness

>>149212423
What's his gimmick? sword eating? world's shortest /hoc/ poster? Is he married to the bearded lady??

>>149212402
>>149212423
>>149212493
>>149212508
>admits it but says its "ironic"
bud1

>>149210044
Cope hes a chinese

>>149212527
happy birthday Mitch what did your boyfriend get you?

>>149212555
checked

[Sad news]
The Mets are currently losing to the Rays 0-6

>>149212555
>>149212599
you're not funny but you are raped

>37 year old is the freshest player on the ice
reminder this """""cup"""""" will be vacated after the PED tests are in

>>149212640
this desu

>>149212654
Cry harder, faggot.

>>149212666

relax everyone Gary’s orders and enjoy some quality puck.

>>149212654
I vacated my balls into yer mom's butt, again.

>>149212760
got em

>>149212546
I went to canada for the first time a few months ago (Vancouver) man, it was full of cute asian girls and pajeets. What happened there?

Mitch is literally replying to himself whose the real loser now?

>scoreless draw

>>149212870

>british columbia

I got the super man promo blizzard today, it slapped :)

>>149212654
Corey Perry and Brad Marchand have combined for 9 goals in the finals. Total zoomer death.

>>149204776
What was the name of the Asian gril mod who posted butt over a decade ago? She was a canucks fan, name might have been kippers or something?

Rip bozo

>>149213062
Is that a good thing, young man?

>most dangerous draw

Is Labatt Blue a popular beer in Canada? I bought a six pack today and honestly it’s not that impressive. Reminds me of Budweiser

>>149213139
Shit was straight bussin no cap frfr

>>149213208
>>149213208
all American Lagers taste the same

Happy Father’s Day to Brad Marchand

>>149213208
I've never even considered having a Labbats, I don't think i've had a Molson since the ladt time I bought a pack of cold shots like 20 years ago.

>>149213211
Well that's just dandy; have a pleasant afternoon

>>149213304
my whore of an ex back then used to down those cold shots then go feral and rip her clothes off attack anyone or thing in site then shit herself and pass out with a smirk.

>>149213208
for me it's carling

>American lagers often share a similar, light, and crisp taste due to a combination of factors, including brewing techniques, ingredient selection, and historical trends in the American beer market. The emphasis on mass production and wide distribution led to a focus on beers that were relatively inexpensive, easy to drink, and appealed to a broad audience, often resulting in a less complex flavor profile.
I'm an IPA or amber ale guy muhself, but sometimes I'll go darker

>>149213391
>>149213420
Didn't ask.

>>149213420
Faaaaaaagggooooottttt

>>149213420
you seem more like a retard guy to me. try something more retarded

>>149213385
Too bad she got away

You zoomers didn't actually think soilers were gonna win this, right? No, of course not.

>>149213420
>I'm an IPA or amber ale guy muhself, but sometimes I'll go darker
based

>>149213420
I hate dark beers. Disgusting.

>>149213597
>>149213597
>>149213597

>>149212654

Mad on line

>>149213639
AND that... is why American lager exists
>for light weights who DO NOT have to feel ashamed.. at all

>why yes i do enjoy red beers so it looks like im puking up blood at the end of the night

I can’t imagine Panthers lose the next 2 games.

>>149213734
I drink some 7% percent golden beer, think it's german. Very smooth.

>yfw wilmer skoog just scarr'd on you

>>149213690
If you think about it he does check all the boxes of a superstar

>>149213843
he'll be coaching soon after he retires

>>149213785
Gary will do his best to prolong the series to game 7

Do you like the Florida Panthers? Their fanbase is a little too...numale...for me. But when Tkachuck and Bennett arrived, they really came into their own, offensively and defensively. At the 2025 trade deadline, Florida traded for this, Brad Marchand, the league's most ratty player. A player so gritty, that most people probably don't even look at his scoring ability. But they should, because its not just about the pleasures of making the other fanbases boil with seethe, its also a personal statement about the team itself.

>Hey, anyone wants to trade for JJ Peterka? Because I really don't want to pay my second best forward. I'll take a shit in my mouth for him.

>>149213843
soilers D is uncommonly shit, and Maurice has likely told the rat to attack them hard, and it's worked

>>149213946
I hear Peterka for Lafreniere is on the table

>>149213903

>>149213690
english canada absolutely beat the fuck out

how's the ahl game goin

Holy shit is that John Podesta?

>>149213946
I heard Peterka and a 3rd for Rossi is on the table

>>149213960
Another Adams masterclass. Trade for someone who's worse and on a worse contract.

>>149213958
The rat going after Bouchard and Walman last night was almost a human rights violation.

>>149214045
Nah, it's chester bennington's dad

>>149208996
>.778%
Yeah knobhead apparently doesn't have the pattern recognition abilities to produce the guaranteed wins. And I shant be giving him any tips (mcdoofus posts here)

so not only does he look like a rat, but his playstyle is also rat-like. interesting. very interesting.

>>149213690
being on those dynasty Canadiens teams must've been so much fun

>>149214065
Sure. As Billy "the menace" Guerin always says: You can never have too many wingers and left shooting defensemen.

>>149214019
Great game, but I can't find a steady stream that isn't "sportboi" which is pretty good but not great either, kinda sketchy site
>flohockey needs to broadcast their post seasons on youtube for free, Gary, make a note of it

>>149214147
dominating a bunch shitters with the boys in winter, then going back to your plumbing job in the summer to fix shitters

PINK PUSSY CLUB
I'LL HRUDLE-DUDLE AT THE
PINK PUSSY CLUB

>>149214226
Wayne grestky said that song sucks

>>149214244
BETMGM
E
T
M
G
M

>muh clubbies
>>149214244
Wayne is a drunk and a gambling degenerate

>scorefull draw in Charlotte, NC

>>149214153
Yurov is coming over to be >our 1C, so we're good.....

>>149214121
plus whoever has the highest number "score" at the end of the game is declared the winner of the game

what does he do

>game goes 2 and 2
> 2:22 in the first
NEAT!!!!!!!!

>>149214244
just looked up the lyrics. literally what the fuck are they thinking

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Knob_Hill_Farms

This was PEAK GROCERY

>>149214341
>literally what the fuck are they thinking
>how do we sexualize children so more without anyone noticing?
Pretty much that.

>>149214326
whatever mcdavid wants him to do

>>149214326
Pull goalie, still loses.

>>149214382
why is that an oilers side mission?

>>149214341
McDavid picked it out herself.

>>149214341
They're unironically jew-brained

Well after watching these last 2 finals I am certain that if Dallas made it to the final in either year Florida would completely destroy them

>>149214417
NHL Commissioner

Doujins with very petite and feminine penises

>scorefull intermission in North Carolina

>>149214353
Mine is a home depot now :(

>Arthur Staple: Rangers and Mika Zibanejad's camp may have already decided that "moving on would be best" - The Athletic

Zibanajid, Lafreniere and K'andre Miller for Peterka and Byram

>>149214471
No doubt but knowing that is was Pete coaching the physicality out of the team because he doesn’t like violence they’re better off without him. So that’s something

>>149214326
It's not a matter of playing Skinnsieve or Pickturd the whole game. Goalie change them at the midway point every game

>>149214522
Damn, I'll never forget what they took from us

>>149214307
Sure.
>>149214326
Scratches different players for no reason whatsoever.

>>149214542
Sam Bennett would bootyblast all these shit players

>>149214592
You just don't understand the nuances, Jergen

>>149214534
In what other city can Zibanjihad work his passion (being a DJ) than New York? I doubt the Panthers or the Kings want him.

>>149214695
Vegass

you guys are retards, pink pony club slaps

>>149214471

>>149214704
.>we don't want him either

>>149214725
For me its La Bamba but we ain't hearing it again this year

retard

>>149214542
>Bouchard
>Reinhart
>HHoF
Reinhart is 0.80 PPG at the end of his prime. Might as well put Tyler Seguin and JT Miller in then.

>>149214695
Do you mean PK Subbanejad?

>>149214734
missing that little cunt next to him that starts slapping someone twice her size and who has the high ground

>>149214725
It's just a ripoff of 80s and late 00s/early 10s pop

>>149214821
which itself was already jewish degenerate garbage back then

>>149214821
and?

>>149214761
maybe he should just fuck off and go be a dj. i wouldn't want him on >my team either

Why are the Charlotte Checkers sponsored by Bojangles, and not the Checkers restaurant chain??

>>149214974
Because Bojangles is a NC staple

we don't sign our posts here
ok how u know
you tell me
so you don't know
huh what u mean

>>149214695
He can be the pre game dj in montreal

>>149214974
Because edomites don't want you to ever be at peace

Million dollar idea bros. Ready for it?

Hockey themed restaurant chain.

>>149215029
are lost little wrestletard?

>>149214821
It's called "nostalgia", lad, and it's a random draw of the cards, really, just pop culture seeing what they can get away with -_-
https://youtu.be/r7qovpFAGrQ

Restaurant themed hockey league

>>149215047
Just put hockey sticks in every Waffle House so the patrons can use them during brawls

>the Athens Rock Lobsters, brought to you by Red Lobster LLC

>>149214542
first two tiers are correct

>>149215069
>IHOP Islanders
islegods we eatin

Can the next thread be soilers rsped again themed?

>>149214734

>>149215069
Mika Zibanejad is a restauranteur

>>149215153
Laffs: RAPED
Lolarolina: RAPED
Soilers: RAPED

>>149214353
it was an event to go to the Cambridge one. sunday best dress even. still have a few of their brown plastic baskets i use for laundry.

>>149215063
turn your monitor on

>Laffs-East: RAPED
>Laffs-South: RAPED
>Laffs-West: RAPED
Fify

>>149215305
>>149215305
>>149215305

>>149202954 (OP)
yet another raped bitch op

>>149204975
stinky lefty mod lives in these threads btw don't say the nono words

>>149215248
Don't forget the lolightning

Most "experts" had them beating the cats in round 1 lmaooooooo

>>149207842
Still the Oilers.