Thread 150230863

>*RIIINGGG* *RINNNGGG*
>hello
>yes, this is Fiorentino Perez, CEO of Real Madrid
>I hope you're having a wonderful day
>I will wire transfer you up to 8 million euro
>all (you) have to do is be our starting centre forward all season
>you will rarely be subbed off
>we'll give you 3 months to train before your first appearance
>if you're tempted to decline, I'm also willing to give you an extra 50M euro if you let me cum over your Nike shoes while you wear them, no one will know about this deal
Would you accept? Be honest.

>>150230863 (OP)
So wait, 8 million a year for playing for Real Madrid? What's the downside besides it being Madrid and me being shit, causing players to mald and fans and media to criticize me? The latter part wouldn't be nice of course, but I'd still be inclined to take the money. Madrid getting weakened by my presence is also a good thing in my opinion. Barcelona profiting however isn't
I don't see why I wouldn't accept. The only annoying part would be the status of a (minor) celebrity after having "failed"

>>150231333
From my point of view, there's a couple of considerable downsides
>be a meme for the rest of the eternity
>be completely harassed for god knows how much time by RM ultras and media
>be obliged to exhaust your body to the absolute limit (even if you pass out on the pitch you still ain't getting subbed off)
ofc how much these all affect you depends from person to person. I'm just curious to see my /spee/ bros perspective.

I would take the deal purely because if *I* can score just one (1) goal for Real Madrid it would prove that La Liga is a total meme league and its teams shouldn't be taken seriously

>>150232466
germans have a humiliation fetish so those are all positives

>>150234983
Aren't Dutches like half German?
>>150234939
A little offtopic, but 2 bongs completely changed the way I perceived football.
I went to Argentina last year, and met 2 lads at a pub (I was looking for a place to watch an Inter's UCL game). I started talking to em, and they told me that in the UK, they see football as basically a game for everyone, where no matter how you are, you still can participate and play with the boys.
It might seem obvious, but I think that's not as clear in other cultures. Football is supossed to be inclusive, but sometimes it can feel as if you weren't allowed to play or express yourself if you're bad lol
Thanks Tom & Tim. Worth mentioning they were Manure and Wolves fan respectively.

>>150230863 (OP)
>8 mil to deal with some banter
Yes, no hesitation. Team pays for my security while I'm there, season ends. I fuck off back to the states 8 mil richer and retire immediately on some quiet piece of lands miles from civilization.

forget that, what the fuck are Madrid doing with the midfield? they haven't bought anyone and even Modric left who was useful as a sub, wtf is Perez doing?

>>150241046
They have mbappe as the 10 and he sells shirts, not sure what you mean

>>150232466

>Exhaust your body to the absolute limit
>It's literally a few hours of jogging

You just have to get out on the field and jog/walk around. The ref can't penalize you for being too shit to ever get near the ball. It's just jogging lmfao soccer fans are so soft

>>150246143
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