Thread 150247495

heemvious: >>150244609

>>150247495 (OP)
Bald fraud

>>150247495 (OP)
dricus du tasteride

I'm bored and drinking. Gonna hang out here.

>>150247495 (OP)
DDP won

>>150247495 (OP)
baldzat

Yeah I'm a jacked Taiwanese boy whatup

You realize theres /heem/s but it's like vr chat and you can make an avatar and communicate in real time and shit right?

>>150247564
u realize u can shut teh fuck up, right?

OOOOOOHHH
KHAMZIP IS DEAD

>>150247518
hello bored and drinking, how do you play "hang out here"

>>150247538
Still jelly of this nigga's beard.
Peakest beard genetics to ever peak.

Dricus is simply too big for Khamzat to handle

>>150247495 (OP)
I just saw the fight between Chimaev and Dricus.
Chimaev tries to push Dricus, but the African doesn't even flinch. Like an iron statue.
This was the last Mog before the fight. What do you think? Do you think Dricus has a chance?

>>150247590
I think you're desperate for people to gas up DDP and minimize Chimaev.

d-driscusbros.. belal is not being serious, right?

Check in wood

>>150247615
bm and fiteen chiraqis

stoicism explained through dricus du plessis

Dricus won the pre-fight story.
>made retards who don't understand perspective think he's a midget next to Cumslut Chimpaev
>turns out he's mogging him in every way
>confident while Cumslut is chimping out
Next, he will win the fight and then win the overall story. He will be 3-0 against Cumslut.

belal might be the only fighter i actually hate

>>150247590
>I just saw the fight between Chimaev and Dricus.
the face off*
>>150247613
I actually think Chimaev will win, but it will be a decision. Chimaev actually has better cardio, but Dricus is tougher.
Both are very strong for the division, but Chimaev seems more skilled at grappling.
Chimaev will 10000% try to rush for a submission in the first minute of the first round.

Paddy's third most recent win is set to lose in an upcoming influencer boxing match with Salt Papi.

BLUNT TO MY LIPS
GUN ON MY HIP
ROCKS IN MY SOCKS
WATCHIN FOR THE PIGS

Green light on Du Puto

71 days until Gane fights.

>>150247660
Who the fuck calls themselves "sal papi?" It's like someone who decided to call themselves "Sugar Daddy" and wanted people to take them seriously. You must be a fucking brain-dead retard to choose such a stupid name.

>dricus and ilia are friends
>ilia and khamzat are friends
>khamzat and arman are friends
a delicate balance

I wish you foreigners were right in front of me right now cause I'd lull you into a false sense of security with a ground game attack and then with 10 seconds left in the round I stand up and kill you with a .45

https://youtu.be/7YMbwChwm10?si=YPmK3NdkFgs-9I8i with the community

>>150247708
Keeping it real as always

>>150247702
you would get disqualified and i would get a dq win

none of you have any good posting ability. post quoters and web whores. Losers really

Now that the UFC is with Paramount, will this make it harder or easier for me to find a pirate stream?
real important question ngtl

you ARE watching lfa right now, right anon?

>>150247574
>strangles you to death
I did the board a favour

>>150247763
no, watching anime right now, babe

why'd you fight that Toad?

>>150247615
Why does he hate Dricus again?

>>150247680
Porps for knowing Project Pat

>>150247741
How? By commission rules I win, you died, whatever happens after doesn't matter. If I was a stupid ufc tard fighter, I'm worth more than you. Unless you challenged Robbie Lawler yourself, you are just some can from a country we care little about

>>150247784
Project Pat is an incredible rapper, good storyteller etc.

>>150247615
No one is afraid of this ZERO title defenses having BITCH lmao

>>150247783
Pigs are haram

>>150247783
Dricus is a white man living in Africa.

Belal automatically becomes the ultimate goat of the sport if he brutally split decisionate poosman

now that i think about it, 'gender bender' is actualy an intimidating nick name. it means that i would bend the gender of who ever i would be fighitng, alternative wnickname would be 'bitch maker'

I notice cumslut lost his cool and dricdaddy is very chill and alpha...

>>150247860
khamzat had to somehow hype up the fight because his opponent has only like 500 followers on ig

when aaron pico looks in the mirror he gives himself chills

>>150247615
what's this nigga doin outside of montreal

>>150247763
no MMA sucks bigly

>>150247899
When was the last time Khamzat fought someone with as many followers as him...?

All these desperate attempts at trying to reclaim the story from dricusfags makes me think he's about to get brutally KOed

>>150247806
I agree. I enjoy the works of his cousin Juicy J as well.

>>150247615
Real nigga alert

paddy = charmander
jdm = charmeleon
dricus = charizard

>>150248029
goosebumps

Where is everyone? The therd was so busy hours ango....

are you guys DDP dick suckers?

you guys watching the poofl?

>>150248242
its friday night bro we're all at the club popping bottle in the VIP

GREAT fight

https://x.com/mma__matchmaker/status/1956525919679529435?s=46

Trump really bussed in hundreds of illegals to cheer for Khazmat lmaoooooo the absolute state of miga

Bella real Chicago gangster u kno dis brazza

Id fuck you in your ass, boy

>>150248300
That is such a fucked up matchup why do they hate bellator so much lmao

>>150248312
Bella Mir is the true Chicago gangsta shawty

>>150248365
Pitbull's 40, not like he's gonna make a fun anyway. Might as well sacrifice him to a guy who people seem to him can go all the way (I haven't watched much of him).

Dunno about you lot but I for one am super excited for the fights tomorrow.

damn bro

>>150248539
it's a pretty good run

Hello my name is Sneed and it's really nice to meet you. You were recommended to me by some people.

>>150247763
No I'm watching pfl finals rn.

>now check out this Dude Wipes® replay

>>150248580
kind of a sloppy chickenweight final

COME ON WARLEY

Yeah there's no way in hell you'd ever catch me watching some PFL slop before UFC. Thats like going to McDonald's before going to Ruby Tuesdays

>>150247615
this guy might have the two most ironic nicknames of all time

>>150247615
damn that would be like some rocky shit, like in the fifth movie when the yung buck rocky's been training becomes champ and has a fight with rocky in the street after that

>>150247870
FACE THE PAIN
FACE THE PAIN

That bf beta is honey dick I know it is no way they have finally made a good fps game

Dricus by MURDER

>>150248539
list of bums
imagine how much toilet paper you'd need for all those bums
like a million miles I bet

Pico is essentially Chandler minus the niglets

Dricus "Stillknocks" du Plessis by whatever the fuck he wants.

welcome to Jackass I'm Aaron Pico and today I'm going to adopt two monkeys

>>150248765
based and TRVE

Still knocks.

Powerslap my nuts through a lawn chair with a hole in it.

Still sucks... Dicks.

>>150248910
we don't sign our posts here

bryan battle ? more like brian fattle

*gulp* https://youtu.be/XMo6aye_6TA?si=QpkbK3sox-jk8WUi

>whittaker took down ddp in less than 5 minutes
>chimaev took down whittaker in less than 1 minute

I’ll just leave it at that.

>>150248990
>redditker

not only am I watching non-UFC WMMA on a Friday night, I'm watching Liz Carmouche in 2025

>>150249042
I'd rather watch Clay Guida shower.

>>150248990
>shittaker

*punches you*

what are u gonna do about it bitch boy, rape me?

>>150249103
wha-

>>150249103
*pulls guard* Let's see how tough you are on top of me big guy

OTF

Sheeeemmm

Hmm

Tarantulas will kidnap small frogs and use them as pets to guard their eggs from smaller insects.

Corey.
Fucking.
Anderson.

>>150249203
take me spidermommy

PFL is going on rn. Why is /heem/ not more active?

>>150249009
>>150249083
yes, that's his point. "redditker/shittaker," who you clearly don't rate, was able to take DDP down easily. Imagine what the best offensive grappler in the history of the sport will do. good job BTFOing yourselves

>>150249261
>Lightweights, Bantamweights & Women's Flyweights

>>150249261
The adults are in control

Liz Carmouche just won the Women’s Flyweight title at 41. Isn’t that incredible?

Usgod status

MVP anime power

>dj picked ddp
>izzy picked ddp
>chael picked ddp
>guru picked ddp
>odds are 2:1 chimaev
are they trying to be contrarian?

betting is degenerate

ABSOLUTE BANGER!

>>150249474
All of those are mufas, putting all my money on Chimaev

>>150249489
Perfect for /heem/ then

For me, it's the picks schizo

What started out as heem turned into the drivers of the NWO kek

Brooklyn wren

I have to work tomorrow do the streaming sites still have the fights up on Sunday

>>150249713
I put in 60 hours m-f try getting a real job

Stop trying to ban me for made up bullshit or Im going to show up at your house and beat the fuck out of you.

Rogan killed it at the weigh ins. We love you GOAT!

Dricus winning is le bad for THE "sport" ok?

Only the most pure stay sane

Bum!

OOOHH TONY HEEMED SALT PAPI

Well that was interesting kek

>>150249840
its more of a thwack sound really

What sucks is Dana nor Trump has offered me a job like wtf bros

Mma guru said he banged countless black women in South Africa. Are you jelly?

>>150249266
>shittaker
just kys bro Dricus by whatever he wants

>Khamzat kept his shirt on
It's over

>>150249943
Yeah just like that depressed australian guy earlier was totally a dad

>>150249943
I've banged 4 and 2 way hotter than that one t. Wild sex haver and modern day Renaissance man

>>150249943
the poop color skin is really disgusting, no thanks

Brazza just lost

>>150249943
BWC magnet

>>150250001
what else is new

>>150249343
>usfraud status
raped

>>150249943
Nice.

Real Russians will kill chimpaev after this

My dick is huge playa!

>>150249955
Never reveal your power level ahead of the fight
-goku

>>150250135
goku died like a five times

>>150250135
He looked skinny but not weight drained. He's going to get mogged badly in the octagon

How the fuck did that anon know Putin was in Alaska yesterday

Yeah but Movsar can crack walnuts with his bear hands.

>>150249943
pls dont post this

>>150250207
We have bare Intel niggas don't even worry about it

Random anglo just decisionated one of Khabib's disciple at peefl

>>150250230
That's what started that wild spam wow heem is powerful

I just revved MMA Joey so bad on stream and now I'm perma b& from his channel

heh
protect yourself at all times

remember when kevin lee got peached up by a make a wish kid on embedded

>>150249945
why would you want me to commit suicide just because we have different predictions. are you really that autistic lmao

Hello, heem

>>150250281
hap peached him up badly

>>150250295
yes
dricus by hitting cumshot over the head with a miniature shittaker

>>150247495 (OP)
Did Dricus get cancelled or say the n word? why is everyone booing?

>>150250314
well everyone knows you don't listen to an autistic person

>>150249943
Need to sniff this and the braps

>>150250325
ok then turn off your internal monologue
heh

>>150250264
what'd you say to that fat sped

>>150250336
I don't think autistic people have internal voices

>>150250299
Been thinking about this webm daily since you started posting it.

One. More. Sleep.

>>150250349
you're thinking of black people

>>150250366
what about the siesta?

>>150250370
neil degrasse tyson def thinks to himself

>>150250343
I simply just pointed out that Ngannou scammed the PFL Africa by No-showing and he had a melty

>>150250334
das ryte y boi

>>150249943
Who dis

>>150250375
no he's autistic

>>150250299
>me putting /heem/ on culture

pissed battle had to drop out. was gonna make so much money on the other guy.

>>150250399
bookies LOVE him

>>150247615
he's not in Chicago

belahawl jabal

>>150250365
It's hard feelings knowing tards have more real feelings than us, that's why I post it to remind us we lost something along the way

>>150250392
i think the autistic barrier to inner dialogue is trumped by a certain IQ threshold
speaking of IQ, how will DDP deal with Chimaev's grappling genius?

>>150250453
folding chair

Dricus

Dricus is essentially johnny bravo

>>150250378
Hey mate can you please stop impersonating me?

>>150250493
you are gonna be so fucking pissed when dricus pulls this off

Dricus? More like mucus.
Chamiv by blowing his nose

goddamn ebay just sent me a congratulatory email for having an account with them for 16 years. i'm old as fuck bros (33)

dricus by TKO due to painted tunnel on canyon wall is +4569322
get in while you can bros

>>150250549
I just bought something off of ebay that's crazy

Dricus will pull a fire retardant out of his shorts and beat khamat over the head with it

>>150250554
what's he making?

DRICUS ...KILL KAHMSHOART, KILL HIM PLEASE I TIRE OF MIDDLE EASTERNERS VERY BADLY OKAY

>>150250556
what did you buy big dawg

I WILL PRAY AND BE BETTER THAN HALF YOUR COUNTRY PLAYA! MUSLIMS? HEH, HOW ABOUT NOW REAL BELIEF BITCHES! WHO WAMTS SOME? ANY OF YOU CUNTS WANT ANY? GONNA BACK DOWN I BET

>>150250592
one of your fossils you old ass stegosaurus

>>150250583
ugh...
when is olivi back from shitting out her mexican manlet baby

UFC is believers in a baby rapist false god, that's their best presentation. What a fucking joke.

post yfw dricus pulls out his contraption

Mashallah

>>150250612
shut your fucking mouth right now honey you wanna go?

>>150250612
only fossil i ever got was yo mama's poonani

This is a fight, not a cartoon

>>150250633
I can.

None of these foreigners have balls, that's why we have military bases all up in their shit. How's that feel Germany, you turkish shit hole

Where is Finland? He's overdue for a choking honestly

>>150250666
this would be so cool if we weren't jew buttslaves just like germany

>>150247495 (OP)
>She picked Khamzat to win EASILY

>>150250666
The sky is ours

Khazmat clearly smokes weed, drinks liquor and fucks whores so how the fuck does the Muslim religion work exactly kek

>>150250702
Same way Jon Jones being a Christian works

>>150250715
Touche ill accept that answer

I would literally stalk Khamzat and kill him in real life. I'd jokingly lead him down a trail and kick him into a bad part of the creek, then shoot him 15 times. Fuck him, how is anyones hero some cleft lip rat

>>150250699
did she pick hernandez or hooper?

>>150250699
she knows dricus is out of her league and is preemptively rejecting him. same as when a fat girl say she doesn't like muscles. pure cope.

Do you tards even realize that chimaev has never even really fought a Middleweight? Whittakers face randomly caved in so it doesn't count.

>>150247495 (OP)
Lil ddp

Dricus by
>Painting a tunnel on a wall of bricks
>Covering up a big hole in the middle of the octagon and Khamzat falling into it
>Anvil falling on Khamzat

>>150250725
gm3

I bet his own dagestan fag camp makes fun of him. Do you support him? I can't. He aint shit. You queers get excited about some foreign piece of shit all the time. I don't understand you guys honestly. Khamzat. Yeah, my hero. A cleft lip rat inbred shit bag. Says a bunch about you honestly.

>>150250737
>>150250724
out of her league? Have you seen FF and Dricus' fiancee? FF mogs, shes legit so beautiful and tall
>>150250722
No idea I do not watch her videos

Bro this dude literally slid on his face like a fucking cartoon getting rug pulled like he does crypto scams

>>150250745
Did he wrestle gm3?

Belal is in episode 6 of heembedded

Heemember Dricus camp had to invent MMA fundamentals from first principles because they didn't have internet access to access YouTube MMA tutorials in africa

We're all Dricus Du Plesis Chad here lil bro settle down and learn how to drown out the nose I'm embarrassed for you honestly

>>150250760
his conditioning coach has changed since then

How good is Gadzhi man, knocked Kevin Lee out in 1

>>150250773
you said fought not wrestled playa

I cant watch the fight tmw. Boss just texted me and said hes hosting an party at the bar and needs the mens room attendant there. I might have wifi can you guys update me? They are watching it at the bar but Im not aloud to leave the bathroom unless on break

>>150250798
Unless you think hes gonna knock out ddp with one punch then its irrelevant

IT'S UP

HEEMBEDDED
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-c4di07MoAQ
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-c4di07MoAQ

if I couldn't watch ufc I just wouldn't bother, it's been shit for 20 years

>>150250820
it's entirely possible. Jamie pull up that clip of Du Plessis in KSW

is he the goat

>>150250836
if it's been shit, why do you still bother?

I'm gonna embed myself in this thread

>>150250858
wrong board, schlomo

okok I sleep gn gents I gotta write a 10 page paper due by midnight tomorrow wish me luck god bless see you for the title fight at least hopefully

GSP
Jon Jones
Ilia Topuria
Chuck lidell

That's the UFC mount Rushmore. Nuff said.

>>150250882
I never saw Chuck or GSP fight

Jon Jones is a cheat

>>150250904
I remember everyone wanted that GSP crispy ass line up and affliction shirt now those were the days

>>150250922
you sound like a homophobe ngl b

is Poatan larping about being a Native American from brazil?

>>150250882
>[common] low quality bait

>>150250937
right

>>150250413
Big talk for a guy who's 0/3 there Shittaker

>>150250859
cause it's fuckin fun sometimes playa!

>>150251014
well then it can't be shit can it

Conor vs artem in BKFC will be so kino

>>150251020
i enjoy shit

Guys there won't be any ass rape during tomorrow nights main event right?

khamzat will never see the takedown coming

>>150251033
I think you're confused. the /box/ thread is down the hall to the left

>>150251038
This shit is actually fucking unbelievable

>>150251038
Till is a better striker than Israel

>>150251050
What about it is unbelievable. It's a low single/ankle pick

it's finally fucking here ufc 319 holy shit
one
more
siesta

>>150251060
Kill yourself faggot!

>>150250729
forearm and muscle difference
>>150251126
that's GirlNextDoorCassidy, one of the GOATs
>>150250760
Ever since Khamzat started looksmaxxing, with the tan, the layered buzz, the beard line up and tapered fade, hes been so dogshit

>>150251130
why? don't be crazy

>>150251038
Is it possible he consciously used his shoulder to press into Izzy's knee and make him fall backwards?
Almost looks like it.

DRICUS BY KO

why would anyone but a hideous shit moslem support kahmzat on this site

shitmaev got dog walked by the corpse of usmeng

DDP will snap his neck

I wish you faggots were more open here in America cause I'd kick the dog shit out of you with a brand new pair of Keen boots. I fucking hate you, your religion your absolute bullshit of a life based on it. No one takes you seriously, and I hope you get comfortable here, because as soon as you are I will shoot you multiple times, lose my cool and SWAT comes in. I might hit one or two, but the thing is, I killed you faggot. I hate people like you. I will get you brother.

YOU THINK YOU ARE SPECIAL BECAUSE YOU GREW UP IN THE DESERT HUH? OK SAND CASTLE BOY, LET'S SEE HOW UUS DEAL WITH A .45 WITH NUFFIN BUT HATE BEHIND IT

HOLY SHIT TONY FERGUSON IN A STANDOFF

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w2NXsZcoZEU
HOLY SHIT TONY FERGUSON IN A STANDOFF

>>150251199
time for your nap driclet..

fart fairy leaked analytics

Aaron Pico as a baby, ya'll ready think "Murphy" is going to beat THIS guy?

> goes to chess match
> plays checkers
yeah, I'm thinkin BASED!

KILL THE BOER

>>150251324
that lil hombre gets bullied in the chuck e cheese tunnels

>>150251337
bro got a g shock watch in kinder garden, respect him

DDP is a goofy

>>150251328
bro got a picture for ants saved and named

>>150251339
g-shock? you mean like gay-shock! hahaha xdxd
>*dunks him in the ball pit*

>>150251337
Holy shit, memory unlocked. Totally forgot about those tunnels

>>150250702
religion will always be for the common pleb and anyone who gets money/power immediately gets to circumvent most of religions laws which are generally for the unintelligent goy

>>150250760
how is khamzat able to take people down when hes shooting from a mile away with no setup lmao are ufc fighters really that shit at guarding takedowns

>I AM THE CHAMP I AM THE KING
soon

>>150251381
BASED

>>150251365
parents never knew what went on in there

>Wrestling since age 4
>Started Boxing and Pankration at 10
>Won Golden Gloves and PAL tournaments at the 12 and 13 age brackets
>Won two State pankration tournaments, 1 national and 1 European in the 12, 13 and 14 y/o brackets
>#1 High School wrestler in the USA
>U17 Worlds Wrestling Champion
>2x U20 Worlds Wrestling Medalist
>2x Senior Wrestling Grand Prix Gold Medalist, 1x Silver and 3x Bronze

>Strangleld in MMA debut
>Knocked out by 2 bums
>Fought 6 guys with no Wikipedia page until age 25
>Lost by shoulder dislocation against guy with Wikipedia page
>Fought 3 more UNRANKED BELLATOR fighters
>Comes to UFC

This guy literally never even fought a ranked Bellator fighter, never fought for a belt, is he even good?

https://old.reddit.com/r/ufc/comments/1mrepqj/jamahal_hill_was_heavily_booed_at_the_ufc319_qa/

Jamahal just roasted a bunch of redditors kek

>>150251377
holy cazzie

>>150251390
He's extremely talented but had some rough losses early. Then he went to train under Greg Jackson and they have been managing his career much more carefully. I guess they think he's finally ready for big fights.

>>150251390
shut the fuck up you stupid asshole
I'm about to make a bunch of money on murphy, don't fuck up my odds

I wish America gassed all you foreign faggots so we could get fat in peace

>>150251402
im a wrestler lol youre dogshit if youre letting someone take you down like that. imagine having the reflexes of a heroin addict in a combat sport

>>150251384
I just remember skittering past other kids I didn't know like we were all part of some giant beetle tunnel. Comfy memory

Leanbeefpatty the baddy

150251412

>>150251414
you're definitely not a wrestler but nice larp. must be a miserable life just anonymously talking shit on the internet about people doing shit while you jerk off to chinese cartoons and flunk community college

Everyday in my hoverchair I have to hear about you useless foreign faggots. Oh wow hawl hawl, Amelican losings! but who cares, America doesnt even care about itself you stupid foreign faggot. The last time we cared we won, and we beat Britain because we were somehow meaner and more inbred than them

>>150251390
the problem here is most of these achievements were won in american competitions which we have seen, as the ufc evolves into a truly global sport, does not rank well or give any indication of whether a fighter is good

YA HEAR THAT BRITAIN? I'M NOT AFRAID ANYMORE!

>>150251439
Britain ain't even here, bro..

Yoiou godless bloodless pieces of shit, oh my god what I would give to get one of you and your family in the woods. I'd fucking chop you like wood. How fancy would you feel then, british bitch?

Live high speed chase

>>150251431

>>150251431

>>150251431

*unheems*

Finland

>>150251442
sorry I overreacted

>>150251437
nice cope

>>150251449
imagine getting into a high speed chase in a convertible and not putting the top down

>>150251427
you cant refute me cause youre a cazzie lol

just know even if you are an mma expert I've got a delicious secret hidden on my ever expanding tum tum and that's a .45 so let's see how you deal with hollow points mister horste gracie

>>150251458
It's okay. Don't let it happen again, kid.

>>150251463
the only current american born and raised champion is kayla harrison and im pretty sure shes a bloke
bo nickal was supposed the next big le division one collegiate wrassler and hes really shit

>>150251464
IMAGINE ME FUCKING POWER UP AND YOU REALIZE IN MOMENT NOT HUMAN AND I FUCKING GRAB YOUR HEAD AND LITERALLY THROW IT THROUGH FIVE WALLS! WOW! YOU READY BITCH

I need to calm down, I'm sorry heem bros

>>150251480
ok but you imagine my thing first

Just because Chimeav is much better and stronger does not mean he will win

>>150251476
so you have a sample size of 1
Pantoja & Merab also became champs exclusively through American gyms
this is a cycle. enjoy having Volk and JDM's time in the sun while it lasts instead of being an envious cunt with a hate boner for the greatest nation on Earf

>>150251449
TONY NO

>>150251498
hes about 20 lbs lighter

>>150251449
bro going 130 weaving through traffic
is that really tony? I'm gonna assume it is

>>150251499
>>150251463

>>150251449
NOOOOOOOOOOO TONY DON'T TAP

Tony bros...

CSO

CHAMP SHIT ONLY

CSO

CHAMP SHIT ONLY

CSO

CHAMP SHIT ONLY

Dricus by level 38 whirlwind

me tomorrow night once Chimaev gets to the back

>>150251170
yeah. the takedown is a classic low single-leg

nobody is rooting for that inbred

That last minute weigh in was fucking GOAT I bet ratlip was already feasting being the undisciplined cows that has missed weight by 8 pounds lmao like bro just go be a squatting slav at that point you inbred this isn't how we do business in the west

>>150251572
I'm nobody

Its good to see propaganda when you are sitting at the dining table cazzies need direction

me when Dricus KO Khamshat in 1st round

>>150251604
I couldn't get through Gringo Papi. It was just depressing. The real classic is You'd Be Surprised. Showtime pulled out all the stops just for him to deliver complete shit. Top tier comedy

I said Finland you freaks

>>150251613
is there any recordings of his stand up shows>??

>>150251604
My stand up would sell out stadiums unfortunately no one wants to sponsor a heem Chad but instead sell his positions to hold him down

>>150247513
>>150247578
He just flat irons it b.

Gmhh

>>150251621
*kills your entire country with a machine gun*
oh dear sorry you fucking can I didn't mean to do all that
*shoots you even more*
faggot

>>150251642
Nothing on the manlet tall lad just has a great physique it's not brutal mogging but it is rare for tall guys to look good

>>150251623
https://www.dailymotion.com/video/x8h1bdt

Enjoy. It's a car wreck. It's the equivalent of being given a UFC title shot in your debut and getting fucking flatlined after 4.5 10-6 rounds

foreign fags get out thread now! monitors off! gezuntight el monitero, you weird sacks of shit off you go!

>>150251625
go to comedy mothership open mic

>>150251663
stop trying to taint the young minds of potential apex prosects you sack of shit, respectfully

Walk into the thread like what up I got a pink cock

Khamzat is gonna wrestlestall until he gets heemed by comically large hammer

how about the comedy brothership
and it's just for the fellas

>>150251652
Hey pal

schaub is actually funny kek

>>150251663
>It's the equivalent of being given a UFC title shot in your debut and getting fucking flatlined after 4.5 10-6 rounds

you aussies are bent and thats ok with me

>>150251675
Get over it, he's fucking awful lol

>>150251671
A man can dream brother

>>150251642
Triggered manlet freak

heh, I'm gonna just bet money on the guy I want to lose so I win either way

>>150251704
to be quite honest I hate that mma is basically some dude I dont care about vs some dude I dont care about, trolling and lying to ourselves is all we got

>>150251702
Woodley kinda ass ngl

robert the kitchen staff whitaker what a legend, versus shit lip mountain bitch this is real fucking fights folks

I love how Weidman is so Acted he is unhinged love to see handsome aesthetic guys get what they are owed

>>150251730
Nate The Great put that absolutely perpetually disgusting monkey in his fucking place! That's what I love about Nate, when he was on he was on. This gigantic cromag ginger with shoulders the size of boulders coming for you. It's always funny seeing him show up and upset all the pushes UFC tried to give people. He killed Maia's right here

>>150251742
What the hell

Joe Rogan has sugar in his gelatine powder

who let bro cook :skull:

>>150251776
dont listen to him he has mcnugget madness

>>150251776
He's a good looking man you faggot

he is dipping and dipping so fast and so hard it would look like goku vs vagita in flyint spce AI jake vieo ok

>>150251727
You might just be aging out, anon. I love watching the new guys come in. You should give them a chance. A lot of good young talent tm like Pico, Prates, Asakura, Chimaev's teammate, Hooper. It'll be a good card

>>150251790
SHUT YOUR STUPID FUCKING MOUTH YOU COCKSUCKER I'VE HAD ENOUGH OF IT

>>150251755
Who's the dana dream smasher of the modern ufc

>>150251808
new guys should fight and if go decision die from drone ok, is this cool you? I think so, ok we agree

>>150251778
>sugar
>salad
I must be confused here

>>150251816
Dana is a fucking bald cocksucking, Italian mob boss rimming son of a bitch but we all used to love him despite his flaws. He's just not the same man now

Weidman is honestly a man dime but like many other he let a woman control his life

jesus christ, imagine bringing up weidman in any conversation ever

>>150251827

American food in the ~1970s was better in some ways: less processed, more balanced variety of meat, veg, fruit. However, by this time WASP families had been away from Europe for several generations, and the housewives began to create abominations only possible in the emerging American consumerist hellscape.

>Jello salad is an American salad made with flavored gelatin, fruit, and sometimes grated carrots or (more rarely) other vegetables. Other ingredients may include cottage cheese, cream cheese, marshmallows, nuts, or pretzels
Schifo e vergogna

You? Cringe

bro who cares about finland

>>150251862
I understand from a pragmatic perspective but jeez louise

the robot chink olympics is a better sport than MMA

>>150251873
Tolkien never not once ever complimented mexico it's people or it's culcha

>>150251873
probably finnish people but not many beyond them

>>150251883
there's like 10 people in there

I want to make all of you care about me then install military bases in your country you ok with that

>>150251883
Also most people here do not care about finland
>>150251908
Your country is so shit you flee to work as whores and gardeners pipe down

I could make everyone hear eat an piece of sweet peaches n cream style corn out of my foreskin hands free under threat of death. Takes an lot of responsibility to be me.

>>150251925
I'm going to use your rectum as a bong and smoke some weed playa!

>>150251822
something like that

>>150251925
>hear eat an piece
>SAAAANK YOU VERY MUCH SARRR YOU KNOW, I AM CANADAN YOU KNOW, MY FRIEND

>>150251925
Based jtb
>>150251949
You don't belong here outlander

Yeah having flags on /heem/ is a huge mistake. Too many people acting like tripfags without having the balls to use a trip. If you want to filter Finland I don't blame you.

>>150251963
you're all the same fucking retard to me

>>150251967
That's why flags are bad. At least Americans can be anonymous.

>>150251963
You spam about being gay for Adesanya and other gay shit

gn bros, sweet heems

I've ever seen an actual Adesanya fight, you guys literally came along when it was nothing but foreign cans thanks for keeping spirit of mma alive you queers I mean dedicated mma fans

>>150252017
schizo ramble

live feed from DDP's eyes

>>150247615
Little terrorist goblin would be the first to run lmao

new zealand lol want some spam for your natives you useless shit of an island

Dricus "Double Penetrated"

I lost 22lb (10kg) in two weeks

Dricus Dos Plessis

>>150249943
Wow
What a sight, im just worri3d her knees night get fucked
Im bringing blanket

. Just Bout that time to. Fucking cocksucking little faggot goddamn asshole. Inconsiderate fucking bitch shut tve fuck up retard. Buttfucking bitch ass nigger

>>150251643
CUMshot RatlipOV

HEY NIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIGEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

>>150250280
I enjoy watching this smug ledditor with the schoolshooter coat, thinking that by standing squared in front of the guy his intelect will stop him from punching
What a dumb retard

how is that still up but I get banned for posting schaub's wife?

>>150250280
guy just attempted the hanayama punch from baki lol

>>150252123
cause ur mexican lol fgt

I HATE MUSLIMS & I HATE MIGRANTS

Khamzat is both of those

>>150252144
Came here to say this

>I HATE MUSLIMS & I HATE MIGRANTS\
>Khamzat is both of those
>...
>ACK!!!!

>>150252144
but migrants has been build australia men

The press conference exemplified again how the average mma fan is a cuck faggot, a pussy, a faggot. A total fucking faggot.

>>150252120
call the guy standing there the redditor but not the faggot that had to pull some gay crouch and cheap shot fake to win the fight lol

>>150252017
Adesanya is a foreign can

i would sell hap to a slave trader.

I would imagine that girl's minge does not smell very good

>>150252191
>*throws in ace*
>"make it double"

Making a dricus du plessis takedown compilation. Will diddy pee land at least one?

where can i watch this without spending 2 hours of my wageslave job

>>150252276
freestreams-live

>>150252276
Watch what, if ufc then you earn whatever 40 an hour you can buy stuff you cheap piece of shit

JUST ONE
MORE FIGHT
AND I'LL BE HISTORY

>>150252271
>light theme
>centered, large taskbar icons
heem yourself asap niggaaaa

>>150252287
Ts not that serious brah

>>150252276
United Center
Chicago, IL, USA

>>150252276
Town Hall Station, vs Me.

>>150252289
yeah, you're right I guess, I just wanted to make fun of someone

>>150252301
Then turn your monitor off

The bet? DDP by decision

GOD DAMN
WHO is that handsome motherfucker with the big dick

I have khamzat by dodgy debatable decision but will pick Dricus

>>150252306
me playa!

I'm thinking Dricus du Beastis if I'm to be honest...

>>150252306
Please turn my monitor on

I met Dricus once he ripped off my pants and shit in them and then forced them back on me and made fun of me for shitting my pants

Good morning

Boers are the strongest whites and Dricus gets a stat bonus fighting against non-whites. Can't see him losing 2bqhwyf

Now the wmma prawspect that displayed stand up yesterday is texting and wanting to hang out on days like this I am Qazaqstani

>>150252336
He's a hugonaut not a boar you retarded and very stupid piece of (stinky and sticky) shit

>>150252282
im not giving my money to a fucking faggot bald billionaire faggot baldie

Dricus Du Piglet is a boar

>>150252348
Very good

Bet the house on Dricus I say.

>>150252343
relax

bet my entire penus on kamzatt

i think im going to take a nap

>>150252335
Ufc women r so chopped except middle fuck

Who is the american bonnarposting

>>150252199
Sometimes

>>150252410
I fucked all of them. (Especially the one holding the camera)

*heavy breathing*

>>150252419
I mean specifically the BK chick b >>150252180 not minge at large

MMA Media, the MMA Media, MMA, Media, let's give a round of applause to the MMA Media members.

Ariel Helwaning a MacLife ferret (Oscar Willis) on the John Morgan will need Schmopaper to clean all the Yee out my Nina Drama cheeks and mmaguru once said gypsies are honorable people who fight clean

>>150252335
>want to quit your dead end wrestling job
>crazy boss wont let you go
>stage a murder suicide after killing your wife and kids
>sneak off to thailand
>get tits
>start the new life you always dreamed about

Do black Africans support Dricus?

>>150252557
They live on handouts and can barely support themselves b

>>150252306
Chase hooper

>>150252282
>40/hour
how do I get a job thats 25 even and doesn't need 450 years of job experience

I haven't been following the UFC for the past couple of months, how have the whites been doing?

>>150252668
Excellent

>>150252673
Class
rTom got a fight as well didn't he

Dricus vs Khamzat is a fight that was never meant to happend. Dricus is a fighter who shouldn't really be as successful as he is, but he is due to being a new seed of fighters that tore through a division of old veterans. Middleweight is finally getting new guys at the top so the competition is probably gonna get tougher to stay at the top. Dricus really is just one lucky guy that got to the belt first.
As for Khamzat, he was supposed to be the next big thing at welterweight maybe even champion by beating Usman (but I think Usman could probably win at welterweight). Now, his fighting at middleweight which is probably more beneficial for him. Anyway, this fight really showcases that we are in a cursed timeline.

I was informed of the vegas results within a certain degree of certainty

remember when chimpaev used to represent sweden?

this is the best possible fight the UFC could make next to Islam/Toupuria, can't fucking wait anymore

>>150252733
hmmm you shure, b?

>>150252667
I'll let you know when I figure it out bappa
>>150252733
Lot of cheek coming in here