>playing pathfinder

>they aren't even trying to find the path

What the fuck even is the point

>>95915025 (OP)
other people already found the path

>>95915025 (OP)
They need Uganda Knuckles to show them.

>play as a barbarian

>no rome in the setting

what am I even supposed to do then, just masturbate in the woods?

>>95915025 (OP)
>playing dungeons and dragons
>no dungeons
>no dragons
>just some big ass city with sewer rats
We're all being scammed and lied to.

>>95915025 (OP)
>Playing Shitseeker
>Everyone in the party is a pink or purple transvestite demon
Nailed it

>>95915025 (OP)
>playing GURPS

>there is not a single GURP

What the hell

>>95915025 (OP)
>playing Warhammer 40,000
>no time travel forty thousand years into the future
Why even live

>Playing Call of Cthulhu
>We don't get called by Cthulhu

>playing Daggerheart

>stab DM in the heart with daggers

>no game

unrelated note, how do i get rid of a overweight man's corpse?

>>95915025 (OP)
Last week I played pathfinder and the party found a path.
Checkmate atheists.

>>95915354
Preach. I played Dungeons & Dragons, and there was not only a dungeon, but a dragon in it, too.

>>95915025 (OP)
>play as a paladin
>there's no Charlemagne in the campaign

>>95915332
just put wig and lipstick on the corpse and call cops to pick him up, they will close it as obvious suicide

>>95915354
>>95915401
These dragons... they lurk in ancient dungeons... we'll have to find the path to them...

>>95915185
Yes

>>95915296
>he never called after the first date

>>95915025 (OP)
>playing Busty Barbarian Bimbos
>suddenly... holy shit...my groin

>Everyone is John
>none of the players are named John

>play monopoly
>Is an oligopoly

>>95915452
kek

>Play Anima: Beyond fantasy
>There is no animation
>It is very much fantasy
I am starting to think these spaniards don't know english very well...

>playing Pathfinder
>only find routes

>Play fatal
>character doesn't get killed, just diddled

wtf is this shit?

>>95915296
Heartbreaking, truly is. Not even a manwhore like Cthulhu calling you back, just... devastating.

Now, if he could've just done that with my mother, I wouldn't have hypertelorism, but such is life and the sea's calling.

>>95915025 (OP)
>Playing Call of Cthulhu
>Phone doesn't ring once
Shit game

>Playing Shadow of the Demon Lord
>There isn't any big ass shadow from the Demon Lord anywhere
Literal shit game.

>Playing Astro Inferno
>It doesn't take place in space and nothing is on fire
Shit game

>Playing Bunkers and Badasses
>First session takes place in a bunker and enemies with a Badass modifier are encountered
Surprisingly on brand

>Playing MAID
>You play as a maid
Nailed it

>>95915025 (OP)
>playing warhammer
>everyone's using swords spears and bows

>>95915025 (OP)
>play Lancer
>not a horse in sight

>>95915025 (OP)
>play star without number
>the stars have a number

>Play superhero D20
>We are superheros
>We use a d20

>play only war
>there is only war

>>95915207
Funniest one in the thread.

>>95915025 (OP)
should have played Road seekers instead

>>95919468
today I learned they actually made a bunkers and badasses rpg. nice.

>>95922908
>>95919468
Shit, really? Is it any good?

>play Das Schwarze Auge
>nobody gets beaten until they have a black eye

>play Dungeon Crawl Classics
>doesn't have dungeon crawl mechanics

>play Palladium Fantasy
>only find gold for treasure, not palladium.

>play Savage Worlds
>most of the world is civilized

>play Shadowdark
>everyone makes sure torches are lit

>play Zweihänder
>doesn't require two hands to play unless meanwhile you're strangling Daniel Fox

>playing Warhammer 40k
I've yet to see a single warhammer. Everyone is using a bunch of stupid guns.

>play Starfinder
>the stars have already been found

>>95922930
For an RPG it's pretty bad.
Overland travel rules, vehicle combat rules, survival rules? Nope. None of that shit is even mentioned.

It is purely hopping from set piece to set piece and killing shit or interacting with NPCs in "humorous" ways.

The good
>You roll a d20 to attack and only miss on a natural 1. That is you having to reload and some guns have debilitating effects when you reload.
>Your roll determines how many times your weapon hits a target and higher rolls can trigger elemental effects
>Enemies can hurt you pretty bad if the BM hands out meta currency to do so.
>The meta currency can be cashed in to perform Badass moments where you describe doing something with no limit on action economy, damage outcomes, etc but the more complex or over the top it is, the harder it is to do
>Good news. You roll the Bad Ass die for a Bad ass moment. 18,19, or 20? It happens as you describe. 1,2, or 3? Crit fail, not only did you not do what you wanted, you are doing the humiliation conga as every element fucks you over somehow. Regular fail? You just don't pull off what you were trying to do and lose the meta currency.
>Character creation is fast. Advancement is fast. Build options are limited and work off a pyramid style skill progression system.
>A crazy huge amount of tables for random loot, random potions (including random effects), and random weapons with random modifiers like a double barrel shotgun that fires rockets and is possessed by a dead guy
>It doesn't take itself seriously at all
>Doesn't overstay it's welcome
>Characters literally cannot die, they just get respawned at nearby cauldron and may or may not have side effects like a constantly farting or a second ass. So the BM is actively encouraged to try his best to kill the players with the appropriate enemies.

>>95932577
All in all, they built it around a very specific play style, audience, and Game master. In that regard, it's solid. It literally cannot be used in any other way, the bestiary is on the small side, and it is clearly meant to played with minis.

>play traveler
>traveling quite a bit

>>95915025 (OP)
we're gonna take it to the bridge

>>95935191
>play bridges and bandits
>end up in a cave fighting a dragon

>>95915025 (OP)
>play warhammer fantasy
>there is a warhammer but no fantasy
what gives?

>play battleships
>the navy has decomissioned their battleships

>play sorry
>not sorry

>play poker
>no one pokes anyone

>play Expedition: Agartha Descent: Scramble to the Center of the Earth
>takes place in Agartha
>features expeditions
>the expeditions descend into Agartha
>the expeditions fight each other
Hey, if it works it works.

>Play Mage: the awakening
>My character fall asleep

>>95938423
>play blackjack
>it's only white people and none are named jack

>>95915194
Now what you need to understand about Dungeons & Dragons is that dragons are shapeshifters. Damn near ANYTHING you meet can secretly be a dragon in disguise. Those sewer rats? Shapeshifted copper dragons. That big city? It's a bunch of ancient dragons huddled together and sitting really still.
As for where the dungeons are, well it's a euphemism, the whole world's a dungeon when you get into it.

>>95940756
>the dungeon is the dragon
holy shit adventurebros...

>>95915194
>just some big ass city with sewer rats
Man, I just got a forest and some goblins.

>"You may have ran the Dungeon, but it turns out I was the real Dragon."
>he shoots him in the face and the credits roll

>"If only you'd been quicker to find the path maybe you would've lived, but unfortunately, you're no Pathfinder."
>he shoots him in the face and the credits roll

>"Would you look at that? I survived the Dungeon Crawl. Classic, really."
>he shoots him in the face and the credits roll

>"No longer will we be stuck suffering in the Shadow of the Demon Lord!"
>he shoots him in the face and the credits roll

>"You should've known someone like me could easily survive the Forbidden Lands."
>he shoots him in the face and the credits roll

>>95915025 (OP)
>Play DnD
>Encounter a Dragon in a Dungeon

>Bloodbowl
>Theres no bowl

>>95942311
At least there's blood, right?

>Play Gaslands
>The planet isn't a gas giant

>>95915207
>But the urge to rattle plastic cups...

>>95942260
>Play DnD
>Encounter a Dungeon in a Dragon

>>95945308
>Put phone on DnD
>Nobody texts or calls me

>>95915025 (OP)
>Playing Mutants and Masterminds
>Everyone superstrong aliens, orphans, supersoldiers and wizards

>Wizards of the Coast
>Not actually wizards
>Not particularly coastal either despite being in Seattle, prefers to be inland.

>>95915025 (OP)
>Warhammer 40,000
>Big Man himself used to use a sword but now cant even wipe his own arse.
>Was never 40,000 hammers in any of the lore.

>>95915025 (OP)
>play Infinity with friend.
>game only lasts about 2 hours.
Fuckin scammed again.

>>95915025 (OP)
Play Trench Crusade:
> Features Crusaders
> Features Trenches
> Bonus points for fucked up demon shit and fucked up jesus clone anthropophagy shit.
Be like Trench Crusade.

>>95950414
>be like french
No thanks

>>95915025 (OP)
>/tg/
>Isn't a mix of /t/ - torrents and /g/ - technology

>>95938663
we don't have multi-layer games yet though. Unless you count Muan Diver fuckery as descending. Or Sky Jannies.

>>95958339
>4chan
>more than 4 of them
>none of them are TV channels

>>95915025 (OP)
>playing Deathwatch
>we watch many people die