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Thread 96472063

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Anonymous No.96472063 [Report] >>96474338 >>96477009 >>96483398
WHOLESOME elf thread
Talk about your pointy ears characters, elfish campaigns and /tg/ projects of noble spirit and fine craftsmanship.
Please keep the AI at a minimum (0).

Last thread: >>96408710
Anonymous No.96472157 [Report] >>96473786 >>96473813
>>96467058
How is her personality like? You call her redneck but she doesn't dress lick a hilly-billy.
Anonymous No.96473705 [Report] >>96489817
I need more cute, long, small-breasted elves in my life.
Anonymous No.96473715 [Report] >>96473877
I find it so romantic when an Elda falls in love with an Adan.
Anonymous No.96473738 [Report] >>96473977
Anonymous No.96473765 [Report]
Anonymous No.96473773 [Report]
Anonymous No.96473782 [Report] >>96481034
Anonymous No.96473786 [Report] >>96473813 >>96473976 >>96474318 >>96474893
>>96472157
>Right up to campaign
· She is a middle child
· She is somewhat an airhead without a general direction where she would go and what she wants to do with her life (which lead her down the long series of events that is our campaign)
· She is a very bubbly, talkative, expressive and overall positive character (My headcannon is that all elves have a strong tendency to express their emotions which separates them from humans)
· Very social. Likes hanging around people and talking to people
· Would show a lot of patience to a person she deems wrong, ignorant or stupid
· Always tries to deescalate a situation
· Almost always polite would rarely insult a person
· Living in high-trust, low population society where everyone knows each other has made her very gullible though
· She would always think that people have good intentions and if they don't, she would believe they're not good at showing it
· She is mostly ignorant of culture/life outside of her small little town (for example, she didn't know "mayfly" is an insult to most short-lived races) and would apologize if confronted in such situations

>Currently in campaign
· Jaded, tired and emotionally worn out (the type that sleep wont fix)
· Impulsive and reckless under stress
· Prefers being alone
· Distrustful, sceptic
· Relying more on gut feeling than ever before
· Will try improving/returning things to normal more out of habit more than any wish for a better world
· Starting to believe that some people just don't have a good side
· Much more manipulative/will manipulate a neutral person to confront someone she believes is bad
· Coping with intoxicants (smoking, drinking)
· More honest, direct and will insult a person to their face regardless of consequences
· Will let you fuck yourself up by your own mistake even if she could've prevented it

>You call her redneck but she doesn't dress lick a hilly-billy.
She does when her wood/wild elven blood kicks in (Bogleaf Slide).
Anonymous No.96473813 [Report] >>96473969
>>96472157
>how is her personality like
ESL simp. I'll put money on it.

>>96473786
Get a trip so I can filter you and your avatar please.
Anonymous No.96473821 [Report] >>96473977 >>96475999
Anonymous No.96473833 [Report]
Anonymous No.96473877 [Report] >>96473935 >>96473970 >>96474489
>>96473715
Anon, wholesome thread, please. Only wholesome elf couples.
Anonymous No.96473899 [Report] >>96474028
Anonymous No.96473910 [Report]
Anonymous No.96473912 [Report]
Anonymous No.96473914 [Report] >>96473928
Well, would you trust her?
Anonymous No.96473923 [Report]
Anonymous No.96473925 [Report] >>96473970
miss my elf wife
Anonymous No.96473927 [Report]
Anonymous No.96473928 [Report] >>96473985
>>96473914
Yes because nothing in those woods is as dangerous as me. She will soon see.
Anonymous No.96473933 [Report]
Anonymous No.96473935 [Report]
>>96473877
Anonymous No.96473958 [Report]
Anonymous No.96473969 [Report] >>96474893
>>96473813
>Get a trip so I can filter you and your avatar please
No. You will have to endure an elf in elf thread.
Anonymous No.96473970 [Report] >>96477044
>>96473877
>>96473925

Married the Elf.
Anonymous No.96473976 [Report] >>96474190
>>96473786
>the type that sleep wont fix
good thing elves don't sleep
Anonymous No.96473977 [Report] >>96474004
>>96473821
>>96473738
I'm going to be real with you. High impact violent babymaking sex with obligatory ear nibbling with Thayla nightly until she's too pregnant to fuck safely.
Anonymous No.96473985 [Report] >>96474003 >>96474085
>>96473928
>Be a human
>Thinking you're more dangerous than an elf
Anonymous No.96473988 [Report]
Anonymous No.96474003 [Report] >>96474182
>>96473985
Sorry, I'm a CR 14 Lycanthrope. Should mention.
Anonymous No.96474004 [Report] >>96474189
>>96473977
Good. Your children would also get two moms to take care of them...
Anonymous No.96474020 [Report]
Anonymous No.96474028 [Report]
>>96473899
anal elf
Anonymous No.96474035 [Report] >>96478001 >>96498448
Anonymous No.96474047 [Report]
Anonymous No.96474061 [Report]
We must all respect the fantastic grace and dexterity of the Elfen people.
Anonymous No.96474066 [Report]
I wonder what caused this mental meltdown.
Anonymous No.96474079 [Report] >>96498448
Anonymous No.96474085 [Report] >>96474114 >>96474182 >>96485104
>>96473985
>post a half-elf
>fraction of the lifetime of a regular elf
>infertile
>will forever be reminded of her inferiority by those better than her
what I want to say: stop posting dirty mudbloods
Anonymous No.96474114 [Report] >>96474204
>>96474085
Cmon you can't blame the guy.
Elfen women (and men, same thing) can't resist the BHC. These lithe, slender fae are BUILT for it.

Even if they act like they're not, that's just playing hard to get because they hope for a rough correction~
Anonymous No.96474120 [Report]
Anonymous No.96474182 [Report] >>96474227
>>96474003
Oh my, that does sound dangerous. You still need to watch out for those elves.

>>96474085
Why are you so mad?
Anonymous No.96474189 [Report] >>96474222
>>96474004
I'd hope to fuck the evil part out of her
Anonymous No.96474190 [Report] >>96474204
>>96473976
DM changed the rules so that they do (4 hours though)
Anonymous No.96474204 [Report] >>96474227
>>96474114
wishful thinking- if anything elves wouldn't go for those ugly things you call men, with beards and hair
and even if they only went for the young ones and women, humans age way too fast
at best it is going to be a short time thing and the elf will be disgusted by your frailty, at worst traumatized by seeing them waste away
never mind the fact that they'll have to endure the ridicule of their brethren as fucking humans would be the human equivalent to screwing with animals

hating on half-elves is natural and they're abominations
>except when they're part dragons because dragons are superior to elves and humans
>and dragons have low standards anyway

>>96474190
yes, it is called reverie- you know- that trance thing
Anonymous No.96474211 [Report]
In my sillier campaign setting, the head of the city of Slank-Mobeef's healers guild is an elf cleric who mournfully tells all her human patients they have less than a century to live.
Anonymous No.96474222 [Report] >>96477594
>>96474189
Evil is the lack of Good. You don't fuck the evil out. You stuff and fill her with your goodness.
Anonymous No.96474227 [Report]
>>96474182
Now there's a REAL Elf. No one can argue with the Grand Mistress Deedlit.
I won't be careful though. I eat Elfen ass for breakfast.

>>96474204
I don't care what they feel or experience. I'm here to mate and move on.
Anonymous No.96474318 [Report] >>96474372
>>96473786
She sounds like a very good character to be around in both of her phases. But I admit she sounds extremely fun in the latter because is the perfect conduct for a lot of havoc and mischievous conflicts. I though you called her a hilly-billy because she was elf-racist that would've been hilarious.
Anonymous No.96474338 [Report] >>96474475 >>96474867
>>96472063 (OP)
>no Pirotess connection in the OP
>no dark elf in the OP
>no dark elf couples posted

mediocre.
Anonymous No.96474371 [Report]
Anonymous No.96474372 [Report] >>96474893 >>96477453
>>96474318
>She sounds like a very good character to be around in both of her phases
Sadly, she is the only adult in the party. The other adult person suicided into a greater demon.
>But I admit she sounds extremely fun in the latter because is the perfect conduct for a lot of havoc and mischievous conflicts.
Oh brother...the bickering and occasional pvp makes the whole campaign worth it. Believe it or not, she is still the party's only adult and the only person willing to negotiate.
>I though you called her a hilly-billy because she was elf-racist
No, no, but constantly talking in southern accent is fun.
Anonymous No.96474475 [Report] >>96474488 >>96477586
>>96474338
Everyone couples with dark elves. They're sluts.
Anonymous No.96474488 [Report] >>96474506
>>96474475
Duergar post.
Anonymous No.96474489 [Report] >>96474518
>>96473877
But it is wholesome.
It's one of the most wholesome things about the elves.
Anonymous No.96474506 [Report]
>>96474488
That's our word. You can say Duerga if we let you.
Anonymous No.96474518 [Report] >>96474752
>>96474489
Sorry anon, but 4chan has successfully shitposted this pairing into vile garbage for brownoids.
Anonymous No.96474752 [Report] >>96476944
>>96474518
That's disappointing, how 4chan's tastes have degenerated.
Anonymous No.96474772 [Report]
An elf thread free of human taint...
Anonymous No.96474867 [Report]
>>96474338
>slop poster thinks he can make demands of anymore
Anonymous No.96474893 [Report] >>96475245
>>96473786
>>96473969
>>96474372
I know what kind of elf you are.
Anonymous No.96475164 [Report]
Anonymous No.96475192 [Report]
Anonymous No.96475245 [Report]
>>96474893
Anonymous No.96475500 [Report] >>96475650 >>96475761
an elven bard poor and dumb as fuck in his homeland, goes travelling telling every human maiden he's actually an elven prince.
Anonymous No.96475650 [Report]
>>96475500
k
Anonymous No.96475761 [Report]
>>96475500
Just don't fuck any half-elves Quagmire and you won't need to trouble yourself with any surprise incest
Anonymous No.96475999 [Report]
>>96473821
that physique is perfect
>decently toned/muscular arms/shoulders
>relatively VERY short torso
>thin waist
>hips for days
>relatively long legs
Anonymous No.96476944 [Report]
>>96474752
It is. But you're on (((4chan))) now.
Anonymous No.96477009 [Report]
>>96472063 (OP)
>Please keep the AI at a minimum (0)
No.
Anonymous No.96477044 [Report] >>96477096
>>96473970
This reminds me of a horse and his boy, where the guy and girl married so they could more easily argue with each other.
Hey, we all have out unique relationship dynamics.
Anonymous No.96477096 [Report] >>96477265
>>96477044
That is my favorite Narnia book. Shamed they never got to make movies of the rest of the series though I worry about how casual fans might react to last one.
Anonymous No.96477265 [Report] >>96477334 >>96477374
>>96477096
>everyone but Susan gets the "good ending"
Absolutely hilarious.
Anonymous No.96477334 [Report]
>>96477265
I mean define good in this context. I know heaven and all that but its a bit of a bitch to get in. Plus there was still hope for Susan.
Anonymous No.96477374 [Report] >>96477412
>>96477265
Well she didn't die
Anonymous No.96477412 [Report]
>>96477374
Having to carry the deaths of your entire family is still pretty brutal though.
Anonymous No.96477438 [Report]
Where the fugg is gwaak when you need him
Anonymous No.96477453 [Report] >>96478532
>>96474372
>she is the only adult in the party
Playing with brats sounds like hell. I pity you anon (and your cute redneck elf).
Anonymous No.96477586 [Report] >>96477602 >>96477674 >>96478515
>>96474475
except dark elf men it would seem. Are they all chuds that treat their women like shit which is why dark elf women are so eager to find non-dark elf partners?
Anonymous No.96477594 [Report] >>96477811
>>96474222
yeah that's not the only thing she's getting stuffed and filled with
Anonymous No.96477602 [Report] >>96477687 >>96477695 >>96477911
>>96477586
It's actually canon that Dark Elf men are the subservient role in the matriarchal society.
Dark Elf Women seek out non-beta males for breeding.
Anonymous No.96477674 [Report]
>>96477586
Pretty sure in ES that's literally erotic fan fiction.
God bless Crassius Curio.
Anonymous No.96477687 [Report]
>>96477602
>a free man of my race? Pitiful, weak!
>an enslaved lesser race's male? [baby boom ensues]
At least dark elf men get enslaved human women and can form families that aren't absolutely sociopathic.
Anonymous No.96477695 [Report] >>96477711 >>96478515
>>96477602
>full control over their own men and hold all the power in their own society
>still seek out foreign men and become submissive tradwives

why are they like this?
Anonymous No.96477711 [Report] >>96477867
>>96477695
Trad for them is bloodthirsty matriarch.
You do not want a drow tradwife, get one of those freaky alt-girls that do things like "value your opinion" and "won't beat you".
Anonymous No.96477811 [Report]
>>96477594
But anon. That's the plan.
Anonymous No.96477867 [Report]
>>96477711
trad by surface standards of course. And I was speaking more of brown dark elves since I've never seen dark elf couples.
Both grey and brown dark elves are made for instant loss and domestication however
Anonymous No.96477911 [Report]
>>96477602
>Dark Elf Women seek out non-beta males for breeding
So... dark elf men. Since half-dark-elves are very rare in whatever setting you are not talking about.
Anonymous No.96477953 [Report] >>96477989
>ahh! Sir Chaddington... I almost can't make out your impressive frame since the radiance of your armor blinds me like the sun...
>why don't you cum in me... err cum with... come with me and I'll show you a safe way
Anonymous No.96477989 [Report]
>>96477953
Anonymous No.96478001 [Report]
>>96474035
Too wholesome for me.
Anonymous No.96478006 [Report]
Wholesome...
Anonymous No.96478025 [Report] >>96478042 >>96478059 >>96478079
wow, what ttrpg are we talking about?
Hentai? the random porn fic you're currently busy writing? that doesn't sound like any game I know
maybe you should read an actual book before you post here
if you'd truly love dark elves why haven't you read: Path of the Dark Eldar/Malus Dark-blade series/Legend of Drizzt/War of the Spider Queen
Vault of the Drow is one google search away
you guys don't want to actually discuss elves, you just want to goon and for some reason /e/ and /h/ banned you I assume, and /co/ has mods which leaves /tg/ to suffer your sorry existence
Anonymous No.96478042 [Report]
>>96478025
>wow, what ttrpg are we talking about?
homebrewed derivative of Khelataar.
Anonymous No.96478059 [Report]
>>96478025
Yeah, the usual answer is just muh settan, which is a codeword for "random shitpost I came up on the spot".
Elf threads are, unfortunately, just a den for pornaddicts to congregate and reach a critical mass to make them unusable.
Anonymous No.96478079 [Report]
>>96478025
>wow, what ttrpg are we talking about?
5 leagues from the borderlands.
Dark court elves prefer to live in their own settlements they forbid humans to live inside of, unless it's spouses, while light court elves prefer to fully subjugate their human population by absorbing them into their settlements and eroding their culture.
Anonymous No.96478515 [Report] >>96505461
>>96477695
>>96477586
Dark elven society in forgotten realms is what you would get if you took the most unhinged californian radical feminist women and have them run a society.
>the fantasy element is that it somehow works
>replace the trannies and eunuchs with driders
This is why I unironically call all feminists Lolth worshippers irl
Anonymous No.96478532 [Report]
>>96477453
>Playing with brats sounds like hell.
No, the table is fine. We only have one somewhat problem player. We're just sticking to our characters designs. Sometimes, rarely DM forces us to turn the rp down a bit since we would actually kill each other. Some examples:
>Frost deciding to not throw Arrianne into the river Styx for stabbing Ferris in the throat with the intent to kill
>Arrianne deciding not to kill both Frost and Ferris after a fight where they were left with around 8 hp both (after 4 months ingame of constant bullying)
>John deciding not to drive the car off the cliff after Arrianne accidentally called him a midget
>Ferris not permanently blinding/polymorphing Arrianne into a mouse after a simple argument
>Frost not killing Ferris after he fucked up yet another spell and left his left hand paralyzed
>Amy not killing Ferris after seeing him cast necromancy spells more and more and enjoying it
Anonymous No.96478594 [Report] >>96478602 >>96478628 >>96478651
Do elves value the virginity of their maidens?
Anonymous No.96478602 [Report] >>96478630 >>96478633
>>96478594
Why would they?
Anonymous No.96478628 [Report]
>>96478594
More than humans do.
Anonymous No.96478630 [Report] >>96478638
>>96478602
>you've had thirty thousand years to master the marital arts Lybellica! There's human women with more knowledge than you, come on
Anonymous No.96478633 [Report] >>96478848 >>96479483
>>96478602
A beautiful maiden that has remained unsullied for 1,200 years waiting for the perfect elven man
Anonymous No.96478636 [Report]
>human
Anonymous No.96478638 [Report] >>96478717
>>96478630
you call having sex a martial art?
Anonymous No.96478651 [Report]
>>96478594
no, they don't subscribe to the backwards logic of humans
Anonymous No.96478658 [Report] >>96478678
Considering how long elves live, it would be even more valuable.
I guess this will be the game-less topic to kill this thread
Anonymous No.96478678 [Report]
>>96478658
>Elven geishas being paid in literal kingdoms to have their 1200 y/o poontang deflowered
>matchlife women on suicide watch as they are completely pushed out of the virginmaxxing market
Anonymous No.96478717 [Report]
>>96478638
Hey as long as it works.
Anonymous No.96478725 [Report]
Anonymous No.96478848 [Report] >>96479031
>>96478633
And to disappoint him in bed?
Sounds rather sad.
Anonymous No.96479031 [Report]
>>96478848
lol
Anonymous No.96479483 [Report] >>96479511
>>96478633
On the flipside imagine an anger of an elven incel that was bottling up for 1500 years
Anonymous No.96479511 [Report] >>96479795
>>96479483
I'd imagine he would spend all his time of elfchan and /r/elvenmasculinity seething about "lesser races"
Anonymous No.96479795 [Report] >>96481604
>>96479511
>Andreon Tateis
>Half-elf
Anonymous No.96481003 [Report] >>96481125 >>96481132 >>96481165
can elves be alcoholic?
because in lotr (movie) they can drink alot
forgot about the book lore about that

because i want to play an alcoholic elf dude that got cast out of elven society for being a trashlord in my next gaming session. Would that make sense? class perhaps ranger not sure yet

>system
dnd but with lots of homebrew tweaks (mostly other classes and some rules)

>pic
thats how i envision him but trashier and more messy
Anonymous No.96481034 [Report]
>>96473782
Sauce? I don't usually see much Wizards fanart.
Anonymous No.96481125 [Report] >>96481157
>>96481003
>can elves be alcoholic?
You mean like, LOTR elves, the ones everyone copies?
Anonymous No.96481132 [Report] >>96481157
>>96481003
>can elves be alcoholic?
Anonymous No.96481157 [Report] >>96481175
>>96481125
yeah, those
similar atleast
>>96481132
now thats proper art
Anonymous No.96481165 [Report] >>96481221 >>96481390
>>96481003
I have been thinking about that one particular scene from the movie and how it's equally out of place and faithful to the source material.
Yes, of course elves can be alcoholics, and they are known to drink and party hard in many settings.
For Tolkien specifically, there is a scene in the hobbit book and in the hobbit movies in which some elfen guards got shitfaced, which allowed Bilbo and the dwarves to sneak past them. So, in this instance, that extra scene from the movies breaks lore.
At the same time, elves in the Sil are described as immune to diseases, and as long as their spirit is intact, their bodies heal quickly and barely tire. So, in that sense, that scene actually works when we take the Silmarillion as inspiration.
However, this entire idea of elvish resilience being extraordinary, as long as their spirit is high, is a uniquely Tolkien idea. So, you can't just copy it without copying anything else.
For something homebrew, making it that all Fortitude saving throws (or whatever the system uses for that, physical resilience) by elves are rolled with their Willpower instead could be fun.
Anonymous No.96481175 [Report]
>>96481157
At least the wood elves imported lots of wine from Dorwinion to get absolutely wasted. So maybe if they live inside a cave they need that morale boost.
Anonymous No.96481183 [Report]
Anonymous No.96481213 [Report]
>96481183
Extremely OOC.
Anonymous No.96481221 [Report] >>96481275 >>96481908
>>96481165
the scene were legolas outdrinks gimil with ease is it not?
other than that good point in hobbit they are all totally loaded. good point

personally my goal is to make my character a little weaker even though he is old because he is such a mess, aswell as funny points at the table (i know i know, its a trashy table)

you mean that the more "clear/sober/resilient" the character the stronger the throw? could work definetly
>pic unrelated
Anonymous No.96481275 [Report]
>>96481221
oops forgot to say based on willpower at this time (roll)
Anonymous No.96481390 [Report] >>96481399
>>96481165
Maybe that elvish wine is like some bubba's 190 proof moonshine. Silvan elves are kind of the backwater hicks of the bunch, after all.
Anonymous No.96481399 [Report] >>96481421 >>96481483
>>96481390
The elves that got drunk in the hobbit book largely imported their wine.
Hard to grow stuff in the forest.
Tolkien actually paid a lot of attention to these kinds of things.
Anonymous No.96481421 [Report] >>96481498 >>96481504
>>96481399
technically grapes aren't the only thing you can ferment
>you'd think elves in the forest would have a lot of bees and therefore mead
>or you know, any other type of fruit which you can ferment
Anonymous No.96481483 [Report] >>96481498 >>96481528
>>96481399
>Hard to grow stuff in the forest.
Does corn grow in forests? Because they make Lembas bread out of it. Or do they import that too? Wild grapes do grow in forests and if we stretch the definition of wine a bit, we can find plenty of other drinks:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fruit_wine
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rice_wine
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mead
Anonymous No.96481498 [Report] >>96481528
>>96481421
>>96481483
Argue with Tolkien about that, I'm just saying that they imported wine. Jeez.
Anonymous No.96481504 [Report] >>96481538 >>96481638 >>96482492 >>96483246
>>96481421
>Elves in a forest biome can't make alcohol because they can't grow anything
>Dwarves unnaground with literally no naturally occurring produce can make a lot of alcohol
Make it make sense
Anonymous No.96481528 [Report]
>>96481498
>>96481483
obviously, Tolkien didn't put enough research into his world building
>Tolkien a hack?
Anonymous No.96481538 [Report]
>>96481504
>>Dwarves unnaground with literally no naturally occurring produce can make a lot of alcohol
They, too, import it in Tolkiens universe.
Anonymous No.96481604 [Report]
>>96479795
>What color is your carriage?
>Breathe MANA!
>It was a web of fate attack on me!
Anonymous No.96481638 [Report]
>>96481504
They could buy the raw ingredients and then brew/distill it themselves.
Anonymous No.96481908 [Report] >>96481996
>>96481221
I don't remember reading on any lore related to D&D where they can't get drunk, but also nothing on notable drunk elves
Anonymous No.96481996 [Report] >>96483485
>>96481908
One of the extended scenes in Lord of the Rings had Legolas need to drink A LOT to start feeling a buzz. I forget if that was in the book. I'm gonna assume probably not.
Anonymous No.96482492 [Report]
>>96481504
dwarves would need to import the vast majority of their food to begin with, they have an advanced manufacturing economy to be able to afford that
Anonymous No.96482791 [Report] >>96483347
I want to force myself on a tiny elf.
Anonymous No.96483246 [Report]
>>96481504
obviously they use plump helmets
Anonymous No.96483347 [Report] >>96484440
>>96482791
A drow?
Wait, I just got it. Why drow are so short in DnD. Dark elves are dwarves in Norse myth. So drow are short to better play the part Oh my God it was actually kinda clever.
Anonymous No.96483398 [Report]
>>96472063 (OP)
Elves are so cool, I wish they hadn't all fled to Agartha.
Anonymous No.96483485 [Report]
>>96481996
In the Hobbit the wood elves get plastered nightly to the point that Bilbo is able to count on it to bust the Dwarves out. Presumably Legolas having a huge tolerance is a reference to his people being the most massive alcoholics in Middle Earth. Thranduil is presumably blitzed to Berlin 100% of the time in the films, which would explain why he behaves the way he does.
Anonymous No.96483729 [Report] >>96484047 >>96484940 >>96484971 >>96485313 >>96485593
What should the structure of elven royalty be, just a mirror of human aristocratic societies?
Anonymous No.96484047 [Report]
>>96483729
It might actually be who's the better and wisest leader given their longevity. Or simply the one that hasn't been deposed.
In Oathmark, elven kings and queen's aren't usually hereditary titles as being basically immortal a prince or princess is either gonna be stuck as a simple noble or fuck off with some cronies to form their own state.
Anonymous No.96484440 [Report]
>>96483347
Would have almost been clever, had they not just introduced Duergar anyway.
Anonymous No.96484940 [Report]
>>96483729
>gallons and gallons of royal elf milk.
Anonymous No.96484971 [Report]
>>96483729
Coomer
Anonymous No.96484982 [Report]
>system is Shadowrun
>setting is 5e
>"Cool Hand Lugh" starts life out as a SINless kid in the slums
>he's a Technomancer
>one day he starts seeing things
>things in the Matrix
>nobody knows what he's talking about
>he starts talking to the hallucinations
>he wishes for a companion
>a companion appears and it is soft and fluffy
>his companion helps him do all kinds of things
>like hack into a vending machine for food
>suddenly he's eating three square meals a day
>fast forward about a decade
>"Cool Hand Lugh" is a mercenary gunman
>his guns all talk to him
>he summons The Angels to help him shoot better with the guns that talk to him
>people tell him that he's so pretty
>starts getting called "Pretty Boy Lugh"
>every night he still needs a friend a friend to go to sleep with
>it's the same friend he's always needed
>the first sprite he ever summoned
>when he inevitably dies in a pool of his own blood the last feeling of comfort he will ever have will be the Companion Sprite he has been feeding treats to since he was a kid
Anonymous No.96485104 [Report]
>>96474085
In her setting Half-Elves can potentially live longer than "pure" Elves because genes are weird like that.
Fucked her growth pattern all up though.
Anonymous No.96485143 [Report] >>96485179 >>96485550
how much of their mothers culture should you teach your dark elf children?
Anonymous No.96485179 [Report] >>96485245
>>96485143
As much as can be, without the whole enslaving men and sacrificing people to an evil spider goddess.
Anonymous No.96485207 [Report]
>should
Anonymous No.96485245 [Report] >>96485296
>>96485179
oh dear... not much left then. Probably wouldn't be good to encourage their natural tendencies towards plotting, scheming and infighting either
Anonymous No.96485250 [Report]
Anonymous No.96485296 [Report] >>96485320 >>96485375
>>96485245
There's literally nothing wrong with plotting and scheming.
That's just foresight, long-term planning, systematic approach, manipulation, social skills, and knowing people.
All of that is perfectly innocuous on it's own and can help the child later in life.

As for the infighting, they should learn to trust their family, and that family always comes first, second, and third.
Competition is good, friendly rivalry is good, but no sabotaging each other's efforts. Talk it out, communicate, it'll do everyone good.
Family takes care of their own, and you never ever hurt the family.

>inb4 accidentally create a Cosa Nostra tradition among the darkies
Again, nothing wrong with that. You can't trust anyone in that damn society.
But family will always have your back no matter what, and always fight for you.
Those chronic backstabbers with no one to watch their back don't stand a chance.
Anonymous No.96485313 [Report]
>>96483729
I volunteer for the position of royal underboob sweat cleaner.
Anonymous No.96485320 [Report]
>>96485296
>There's literally nothing wrong with plotting and scheming
Anonymous No.96485375 [Report] >>96485400
>>96485296
>muh family mentality
>idealized view of their homeland because their parents never told them any of the shitty things
>ostracized from larger society due to their background

Oh no they'll turn into second and third gen immigrants
Anonymous No.96485400 [Report]
>>96485375
>their parents never told them any of the shitty things
How do you teach them NOT to backstab their own if you don't tell them about how backstabby the drow society is?
They'll know exactly why "muh family mentality" is important, and why outsiders are not to be trusted.
Coupled with carefully monitored contact with said society, this will drive home and cement the lessons they're being taught.
This is going to be the greatest source of their strength and resilience, both in their youth, and later in life.
Anonymous No.96485550 [Report]
>>96485143
nothing- have you ever tried teaching an aborted fetus something?
Anonymous No.96485593 [Report] >>96486940 >>96488657
>>96483729
Elves have very long lifespans and generations, meaning that an "aristocracy" among the Elves would be very different to a human one since the turnover rate of the ruling class takes radically longer.

Since an Elvish noble can't really expect his father to die any time soon, stewarding the inheritance is probably nott seen as a high priority for them, rather the scions of Elvish nobility have to go and pursue something for themselves where there is still unclaimed space. The Elvish socieial model is thus actually optimized for producing adventurers. Like the Normans immediately before the Crusades, they have large numbers (perhaps even multiple generations still "young" concurrently) who have basically no prospects at home.

So one could imagine that they are biting at the bit for an excuse to conquer something, so many of them become involved with the Church, or with other countries' politics in the hopes of being given lands in the conquered region. A Crusade might not interest them religiously (or it might, desperate young men find their faith all the time!) they would show up anyway and shout Deus Vult louder than anyone if it meant they got to carve off a slice of the Holy Land.

Of course, once the Elves actually take something, then you have a problem, because the process then begins anew, those Elves live for hundreds of years, meaning you can't rely on them assimilating into whatever culture they've conquered, and tons more young Elves who couldn't get in on the war at first will flood in to try and finangle their way into a subordinate position under the new rulers. And inevitably, when everything is parceled out, they're going to start looking around for more things to conquer. Elvish society likely moves in pulses as 2-3 generations build up without prospects and then explode outwards to try and seize more ground. This is almost certainly a phenomenon their neighbors are aware of and resent/fear.
Anonymous No.96486940 [Report]
>>96485593
I think that is just normal aristocracy behavior but on a much larger time scale.
I would put it as a reason to justify low elven birth rate or a much stricter and contrived noble selection process.
Anonymous No.96487091 [Report] >>96487162 >>96489749
Few elf hentais are more wholesome than this. No rape, degradation or other misfortune comes to the elves on-screen. Just lots of vanilla sex for the purpose of procreation.
Anonymous No.96487162 [Report] >>96487198
>>96487091
Get help you sick fuck
Anonymous No.96487163 [Report]
Anonymous No.96487198 [Report] >>96487221
>>96487162
Why do you hate wholesomeness?
Anonymous No.96487221 [Report] >>96487245
>>96487198
*whoresomeness
Anonymous No.96487242 [Report]
>oh noes, the thread is moving too slow!
>better post some outright hentai to get something going!
Why can you stay on the pornboards.
Anonymous No.96487245 [Report]
>>96487221
Why do you hate elaborate and lewd outfits?
Anonymous No.96487288 [Report] >>96487310 >>96487316 >>96487447
Would an elven aristocracy have more sorcerers or wizards?
Anonymous No.96487310 [Report]
>>96487288
I just can't anymore...
Anonymous No.96487316 [Report]
>>96487288
Yes. It would have extremely elves who are extremely specialized in one specific skill regardless if it's magic or something else
Anonymous No.96487440 [Report]
Hot elves created by the Japanes are top tier.
Anonymous No.96487447 [Report]
>>96487288
neither, they'd mostly be blade singers
>why? because they can prove their superior skill of blade and magic to those lesser races
>and look at the pretty blades!
Anonymous No.96487452 [Report] >>96487465
... is a thing no-games say.
Anonymous No.96487465 [Report]
>>96487452
Rebuttal.
Anonymous No.96487469 [Report]
Anonymous No.96487475 [Report]
Pormspam is not wholesome.
Anonymous No.96487502 [Report]
Why do you western game developers love ugliness?
Anonymous No.96488011 [Report] >>96489766 >>96491482
I'm tired of being told Dunmer are the best elves because they have more dumb lore than anyone else
Anonymous No.96488657 [Report]
>>96485593
I think the key here is abdications. After a time elves will have to abdicate for some reason or another. Not everyone but probably more common than in human kingdoms.
Anonymous No.96489749 [Report]
>>96487091
I love this one.
Anonymous No.96489766 [Report] >>96489818
>>96488011
Best elves for me, I really love the Noldor. The heroism, the pride, the fall. The horrible acts of hubris and their damned fate.
Even the most vile among them befriend others, they set upon the foe to save innocents, it makes their oath all that more tragic.
Anonymous No.96489817 [Report]
>>96473705
Man fuck you for not posting the whole thing.
Anonymous No.96489818 [Report] >>96490888
>>96489766
Based.
Anonymous No.96490794 [Report]
Those who don't know sorrow can never know Elfhood, for their lot in life is a heart of glassthread and a surety of suffering.
Anonymous No.96490835 [Report] >>96497102
I personally find the type of comic like the one above to be weird. I wonder if comedy take a nosedive after the early 2000s but sometimes all modern memes feel forced.
Anonymous No.96490888 [Report]
>>96489818
There's no reason for their hair to work like that. They draped every strange like that intentionally.
Anonymous No.96491394 [Report] >>96497102
The reply two above me is quite odd in that it regards a dramatic, sad little comic strip as 'comedy' when it clearly isn't and then is confused about why it's not funny.

This is intense media illiteracy in action.
Anonymous No.96491482 [Report]
>>96488011
TRVKE, it's just something from your average 70's paperback fantasy novel that's been fellated non-stop by people that consider it a point of pride to have played a janky video game 20 years ago
Anonymous No.96491907 [Report]
120 seconds is nothing for an elf.
Anonymous No.96491955 [Report]
>The comic is not funny
Indeed!
Anonymous No.96493885 [Report] >>96494386
this is an elf.
Anonymous No.96494386 [Report] >>96495221 >>96497211
>>96493885
we need one of those for elves
Anonymous No.96495221 [Report] >>96495767 >>96495845 >>96496777 >>96498217 >>96498553 >>96499839
>>96494386
Aight. I'll start. What should be changed here?
Anonymous No.96495767 [Report]
>>96495221
Top right should be a vulcan.
WH40K is still more fantasy setting than anything else
Anonymous No.96495845 [Report]
>>96495221
Y axis should be more about grace or humanoid form. Magical capability still varies too much between too many settings. Plenty of settings and systems allow you to play as a very non magical elven fighter.
Or nature affinity, but then navi should also be top right
Anonymous No.96496777 [Report] >>96496789
>>96495221
Hylians surely should be the chart somewhere
Anonymous No.96496789 [Report] >>96496809 >>96498239 >>96500045
>>96496777
Hylians aren't elves, we've been over this.
Anonymous No.96496809 [Report]
>>96496789
They are pointy-eared white people from a fantasy realm, that look exactly like THE prototypical nipponese elf.
Anonymous No.96497102 [Report] >>96497199 >>96499804
>>96490835
>>96491394
Hey, you guys know you can reply to posts on 4Chan right?
Anonymous No.96497199 [Report] >>96497230
>>96497102
Yeah. I'm not giving that retard a (You) though.
Anonymous No.96497211 [Report]
>>96494386
This sickens me on a truly profound level.
Anonymous No.96497230 [Report] >>96497377
>>96497199
>Not giving yous
Just because you don't link a response doesn't mean you didn't respond. The YOU isn't the point.
Anonymous No.96497377 [Report]
>>96497230
Of course it's the point. It's the dopamine hit that every trolling fuckwit is chasing.
Anonymous No.96498217 [Report]
>>96495221
>Setting purist
>20th century writers
Just say Tolkien
Also even Tolkien didn't specify pointy ears, that actually comes from some guy who was doing the art
Anonymous No.96498239 [Report] >>96498270 >>96498380 >>96498585 >>96498642
>>96496789
If Hylians aren't elves, then the Japanese elves situation would be even more dire.
One of the best representations of an elf hero, gone, because of some autistic argument.
Anonymous No.96498270 [Report]
>>96498239
Obviously they aren't elves because they're not blonde big tits bimbos who don't spend 99% of their time being cockskleeves for the mc or enslaved
Anonymous No.96498380 [Report] >>96498407 >>96498502
>>96498239
>posting some ridiculously off-model fanart

Your "elf" male hero is a crossdressing twink, stop lying to yourself.
Anonymous No.96498407 [Report] >>96498428 >>96498481
>>96498380
>off-model fanart
I hope you are also enraged by half the coombait bimbos with accidental pointy ears in these threads.
Link is a chad for saving the world from darkness multiple times via the power of sword, song, bow and magic. His games are more of a quintessential elf experience than whatever porn game you jerked off to.
Anonymous No.96498428 [Report] >>96498448 >>96498471
>>96498407
but he doesn't look like that
Anonymous No.96498448 [Report] >>96498453
>>96498428
That's contributes a lot to the discussion, but I didn't see you rage at >>96474079 or >>96474035
Anonymous No.96498453 [Report] >>96498464
>>96498448
I don't knows who those characters are supposed to be?
Anonymous No.96498464 [Report] >>96498475
>>96498453
Retard.
Anonymous No.96498471 [Report]
>>96498428
Isn't Link actually several different people but Link and Zelda are continuously reborn over and over again?
>So it is the same person but also not?
>Hylians also rarely make it past 100 and the games are set during different times
Anonymous No.96498475 [Report]
>>96498464
Who are they and why should I be mad?
Anonymous No.96498481 [Report] >>96498489
>>96498407
>I hope you are also enraged by half the coombait bimbos with accidental pointy ears in these threads.

No because they're just one-off images, whereas Link is an established character who looks nothing like that.
Anonymous No.96498483 [Report]
Maybe this pleases the autist.
Anonymous No.96498489 [Report]
>>96498481
>No because they're just one-off images
And Hulkenberg is not?
Anonymous No.96498502 [Report]
>>96498380
Dex build.
Anonymous No.96498511 [Report]
I guess the guy just has a problem with heroic male elf representation.
Anonymous No.96498553 [Report] >>96498559
>>96495221
Axis should be phisnomy(or form) and philosophical. The setting is irrelevant to how you classify a creature.

>Purist
Elves must be tricksy and/or manifestations of the natural world.

>Flexible
Elves must revere and live in harmony with the natural world

>Rebel
Elves need not have any specific relationship with the natural world.

Interestingly, this would put Tolkien elfs in top centre not top right.
Anonymous No.96498559 [Report] >>96498582 >>96498585 >>96498668
>>96498553
Fey are completely different creatures from fantasy elves and I have no idea why you faggots try to put them into the same category, when they already exist alongside in many settings.
Anonymous No.96498582 [Report]
>>96498559
Depending on the setting fairies may or may not be related to elves
>In Pathfinder elves are technically aliens
Anonymous No.96498585 [Report] >>96498605 >>96499839
>>96498559
Because elves, gnomes, goblins, dwarfs, bugbears, boggarts, brownies, and many other fantastical creature that you and I consider distinct now were synonyms less than a hundred years ago. And really still are if you outside of modern fantasy.
Look at Henson's Labrinth as example. The Goblin King is way closer to some kind of malevolent elf but he's a goblin. That's because those terms are one and the same in that context.

>>96498239
While Hylians are certainly elfy the actual elfs of that setting are the Zora.
Anonymous No.96498605 [Report] >>96498632 >>96498668
>>96498585
>were synonyms less than a hundred years ag
Well cool, then play or make systems in which that is the case.
Anonymous No.96498617 [Report]
>gigantic blob of filtered posts

Damn that bad huh.
Anonymous No.96498622 [Report]
Anonymous No.96498632 [Report] >>96498667
>>96498605
I don't need to, I'm in the Philosophically Flexible camp. I can do that and still acknowledge other schools of thought simultaneously because I'm not an irate pissbaby who shits up every thread that he lays his eyes upon.
Anonymous No.96498642 [Report]
>>96498239
At minimum Hylians are Aryan, which is kind of like being elves.
Anonymous No.96498667 [Report]
>>96498632
> still acknowledge other schools of thought simultaneously
Well yes, like acknowledging that high fantasy elves are very different creatures compared to mythological fairies and fey.
Also acknowledging that fairies and fey could differ vastly as well depending on the region, time and culture.
Anonymous No.96498668 [Report] >>96498700
>>96498559
>>96498605
Christ anon. How can I become as autistic as you? Maybe if I'm this autistic my elves will be based????!!!?
Anonymous No.96498697 [Report] >>96498704 >>96498739 >>96498776
faggots in this thread will get mad at everything they consider bad/slop/not elf/coom bait/porn/hentai/to manly/to faggotly/to cute/to racebaiting/to odd/to not humanlike/... as if their opinion is objective
wrong clothes? people get assmad

you are a bunch of insufferable imbeciles that can never be happy
Anonymous No.96498700 [Report]
>>96498668
>autistic
Everyone these days just wants to be a based normalfag or ironic pessimist. I take this as a compliment.
Anonymous No.96498704 [Report] >>96498707 >>96498801 >>96499843
>>96498697
>male human female elf
Insufferable waifutard coomer pornfaggot.
Anonymous No.96498707 [Report] >>96498726
>>96498704
and we got another angry faggot crawling out to prove my point
Anonymous No.96498726 [Report] >>96498752
>>96498707
>the joke > your head
As if you didn't want to bait this reaction with that filename.
It's also not WHOLESOME
Anonymous No.96498739 [Report] >>96498752
>>96498697
It's just one guy, we know who it is. It's your own fault for not having filtered his posts yet.
Anonymous No.96498752 [Report] >>96498798 >>96503375
>>96498726
its wholesome
>>96498739
oh yeah he got trips to filter or what?
Anonymous No.96498776 [Report] >>96498785
>>96498697
It is *too
But I can see from your picture you don't care about grammar
Anonymous No.96498785 [Report]
>>96498776
>english
correct. i dont care about this language or grammar on internet boards
Anonymous No.96498798 [Report] >>96498808 >>96498823
>>96498752
>its wholesome
Sorry, /tg/ has shitposted this pairing into the ground.
Anonymous No.96498801 [Report] >>96498814 >>96498896
>>96498704
She has to settle for a human after all the elf men ran off with goblin women.
Anonymous No.96498808 [Report] >>96498818
>>96498798
>/tg/ shitposted it so its not wholesome
idgi why would it matter
Anonymous No.96498814 [Report] >>96498845
>>96498801
In what system?
Anonymous No.96498818 [Report]
>>96498808
Ironic pessimist.
Anonymous No.96498823 [Report]
>>96498798
Her mouth is weird...
Anonymous No.96498827 [Report]
Maybe elf threads should be about elves.
Anonymous No.96498845 [Report]
>>96498814
Every system.
Anonymous No.96498896 [Report]
>>96498801
The bar in this case is literally in hell
Elven women who get together with lesser races literally settle for less
Only good thing is she can drop him after 80 years after her expectations are literally lowered into the grave, lol
Anonymous No.96499804 [Report] >>96499836
>>96497102
I just said that the comic feels forced. Cartoons and comics used to have a pretend of being witty. But now they're one tone "jokes".
Anonymous No.96499836 [Report]
>>96499804
I can tell you that is because barely anyone wants to do comics, so we're back to square one (shitty newspaper strips tier plot)
Anonymous No.96499839 [Report]
>>96498585
Again with this? Most of that is not elves, not even elf-like. This >>96495221 image is a joke that includes fucking avatar as an "elf" despite them being literal aliens with no relation whatsoever. It shouldn't be taken seriously.
Anonymous No.96499843 [Report] >>96499868 >>96500101
>>96498704
Kek, human male with elf waifu is a pairing as old as the fantasy genre. Heck, you had human men fucking beautifil spirit/fae/whatever creatures in next to every mythology.
Wouldn't be surprised, if there were dozens of stories of human heroes copulating their way through elven beauties in the lost Germanic mythological canon. Likely I'm even missing a few works, that survived until today.
Face it, faggot. Without human men wanting to bone otherworldly beauties there would be no elves.
Anonymous No.96499868 [Report] >>96500036 >>96500098
>>96499843
If you actually check nordic and germanic tales, you'll find that this type of pairing is incredibly rare. I think there was only one instance of a male human and female elf, and one instance of a male elf and female human. Before the medieval times.
It's besides the point anyway. We are talking about modern fantasy, where this pairing has become trite and often badly written for nerds to feel better about themselves, not to depict well-written elves.
inb4 Tolkien.
Anonymous No.96500036 [Report] >>96500057
>>96499868
Since most of the Germanic and Nordic folklore has been lost you can easily multiply those numbers by ten
Anonymous No.96500045 [Report]
>>96496789
In my personal setting, Hylians and Bosmer are part of the same elf family/species/race/genemutation (ELFI DELLE MELE in ancient corrupt language) together with the stereotypical petite redhead elves from Nippon Games.
So, Malon, Fargoth and Mail are part of the same elf family (with Hulkenberg, but she is a magic-genetic aberration.)
***Insert AI-Slop image about Mail and Malon making lesbo things under the full moon

[Genesys - Ruleset]
Archetype: Elfi delle Mele -> Apple elves -> Apulzaelfer
Scientific name: HomoVerus Pomifagens

Brawn: 2
Agility: 3
Intellect: 2
Cunning: 2
Willpower: 1
Presence: 2
Wound Threshold: 9 + Brawn
Strain Threshold: 10 + Willpower
Starting Ranked Skill: Survival
Starting Experience: 90
Hot Tempered - While an Apulzaelf strain exceeds half of their strain threshold, they add two setback dies to all social skill checks and add 1 to the damage of one hit of each melee attack they make.

>Apulzaelfar are characterized by their small, slim, and petite body structure with long, slender legs. Their pointed ears are the biggest in respect to the other Veri species. The male Apulzaelfar are always blonde and have a gaunt face with hollowed cheeks and small lips; sometimes they show freckles or they cannot develop a beard. The female Apulzaelfar are petite and slender with a small chest; their hair is always mahogany, even though young adventurers love to dye their hair with a strong fire red. They often show freckles and their cheeks have a healthy and cute blush. A common mutation is a busty female Apulzaelfar or a chubby male Apulzaelfar. A rare mutation is a tall and slender female Apulzaelfar with natural red eyes and moles on the ears; given their nature, they acquire an important role as a ruler or a counselor in the Dealan-dè families.
Anonymous No.96500057 [Report]
>>96500036
Assumptions are always the best basis for discussion.
Anonymous No.96500098 [Report] >>96500117 >>96501857
>>96499868
>We are talking about modern fantasy, where [insert literally anything] has become trite and often badly written for nerds to feel better about themselves,

I fail to see your point
Anonymous No.96500101 [Report] >>96500564 >>96501322
>>96499843
that book ends with the MC getting together with a human girl who turns out it is his sister
and if you want something even worse the woman who raised him, basically his adopted mother is pinning for him the elves are never portrayed as the good guys, everyone sucks and those few who don't they suffer even the elf king rapes the troll kings daughter to make changelings, who after years of abuse (a couple hundred?) is but a shell who can only repeat a few inane lines of dialogue, they had to mercy kill her
I felt so bad for the MCs mom
also, it has been a while since I've read it but I'm pretty sure the sister gets pregnant and makes a deal with some higher force which bites her in the ass, as she loses ALL her siblings AND her baby
the only people winning are the elves, they’re not even elves, pretty sure they're 'only' fairies
Anonymous No.96500117 [Report] >>96500146
>>96500098
>coombrain
>ironic pessimist
I'll make sure to write 200 extra words when working on my novel this night.
Creating > complaining
Anonymous No.96500146 [Report] >>96500174
>>96500117
Post your draft and I'll link my elf story I got on AO3
Anonymous No.96500174 [Report] >>96500194
>>96500146
I don't care about fanfiction.
>>96485219
>>96485444
>>96486495
Currently not elf-related.
Anonymous No.96500194 [Report]
>>96500174
Don't worry, it's pure OC
Anonymous No.96500564 [Report]
>>96500101
>even the elf king rapes the troll kings daughter to make changelings
Anonymous No.96500603 [Report] >>96500803 >>96501355 >>96503272 >>96505157
Alright then you bickering cunts, let's bicker about something productive for once.
We've all heard the DON'Ts of how to play as an elf. What about some DOs?
>let's say it's a middle-aged el-
Fuck that. Just post whatever you have. Young elf, old elf, slut elf, twink elf — anything goes.
How do you take a PC and make it, unmistakably, an Elf, capital fucking "E"?
What goes into being an elf, what to look out for? How do you handle potential age?
Any relation to the Fey, or behavioral similarities?

>inb4: BUt wHat aboUT YOU???
Had plans to play a young by human standards and somewhat sheltered elf that grew up in bumfuck nowhere.
Basically herding cattle and listening to kooky old people sharing the local spirit lore before the campaign.
He's tagging along with a friend who got them both hired as guards and/or caravan crew (animal handling, physician work, etc.)
The fun part is that the guy's a mute and is a pacifistic pansy, with some ESP to spice things up.
Shit like seeing and being seen by ghosts, even those that can't otherwise see mortal world, and sharing the feelings of anything he touches.
Was going to Sixth Sense that bitch up when things start getting weird, but the plans fell through. Still bummed out about it.
>wat system tho?
GURPS. Lots of numbers, but the charsheet app handles most of it which is neat as fuck.
Makes putting a char together easier too, and lets me look up references in the books when I need a refresher.
Anonymous No.96500803 [Report] >>96506391
>>96500603
>How do you take a PC and make it, unmistakably, an Elf, capital fucking "E"?
Always have a perspective that takes a long time frame into account. Think about the consequences of your actions. It's not hesitation to spring into action, it's simply thinking things through. As you have to live with the consequences of your actions for so much longer than anyone else.

Appreciate beauty, foster beauty, create nice things, enjoy nice things. Life is hard enough, make sure to make it pleasant, not just for you, as a principle. As an elf, you should make the world a more beautiful place or help beauty to spread.
This entails fighting those that despoil the world and spread evil, darkness and ugliness.

The rules and principles of the short-lived races may mean very little to you. Adhere to them as long as it's practical, but don't be serious about it.

Little slights and insults are too below you to care much about them. Laugh and move on. However, serious insults, libel, defamation and damage to your honor should be met with wrath and violence.

Relationships, friendship and bounds with short-lived races should mean little to you, until they don't. Do not swear friendship and loyalty unless you mean it. Then, it should mean everything.
Anonymous No.96501322 [Report]
>>96500101
>that book ends with the MC getting together with a human girl
That's around the middle of the book and she leaves him soon after, for the reason you mentioned in your spoiler.
Right at the end she tries to return to him, because Odin told him, this would save his life. In fact her appearance end up distracting him from the battle and he get's slain.
>the elves are never portrayed as the good guys, everyone sucks and those few who don't they suffer
Just like most other dark fantasy stories.
>and if you want something even worse
It's a major theme in that book that elves have different values compared to humans.
>even the elf king rapes the troll kings daughter
Somewhat true, though he does so by casting a spell without touching her. He himself is disgusted by the process.
>they’re not even elves, pretty sure they're 'only' fairies
Why does this make them not elves? All supernatural forces outside of gods and giants are grouped as fairies in that book.
Anonymous No.96501355 [Report] >>96506391
>>96500603
>high elf
I will shit on the floor, say something racist and lord my superiority of the lesser races, while telling everyone how 'liberal' I am by joining a party with lower life forms who should worship the ground I am walking on, I will then proceed to have a mental break-down when they point out my hypocrisy
>like those white college girls having photo ops with starving children while they pay an organization a few thousand bucks

>wood elf
'My pa sells bows and bow accessories, that's a good bow, I like bows, have I told you about my bow? Did you know I'm an archer? '

>drow
see high elf entry, but crying about how people are racist towards you and when someone sees you commit evil acts you can pull the race card and say they're just being racist

>sea elf
blub blub blub
Anonymous No.96501857 [Report] >>96503131 >>96503229 >>96503486
>>96500098
Reminder: Night Elf women are 7-foot tall amazon warriors and depicting them as human-sized lingerie models is degenerate behavior.
Anonymous No.96503131 [Report] >>96503198 >>96505953
>>96501857
>7-foot tall
It's beautiful isn't it?
Actually, aren't elves in LOTR also very tall?
Anonymous No.96503198 [Report] >>96503302
>>96503131
Warcraft night elves are absolutely massive, and really not the standard.
Anonymous No.96503229 [Report]
>>96501857
i just like Warcrafts depiction of them all. very pretty
Anonymous No.96503272 [Report] >>96506391
>>96500603
>Elves in general - expression of emotion
I always play my elves as emotive beings. Think of a bubbly extrovert that does a lot of hand gestures - that would be your most typical elf. My headcanon is that elves cannot be introverted. They can be quiet, polite and in worst case bottle their emotions but they need a vent much more than humans. This is because I consider elves a middle ground between humans and fey. Fey are completely emotional scatterbrain ADHD beings and elves inherit that need for constant emotional outlet.
>Emotional expression of popular subraces of elves
· Moon Elves (your typical elves)
This would be the default. Their emotional expression is mostly done through social interactions which is why they work best with other races compared to other elves
· Wood/Wild Elves
Their expressions comes from interacting with nature, fey, other magical beings, touching grass. I would consider them more sensory of the others - needing to experience the nature and the world around them and they act as an emotional mirror for their environment. This is why wood elves are terrible outside of their natural environment because if the environment is corrupted, so are they
· High Elves/Sun Elves
These elves would be a complete opposite of wood elves. Their stimulant would be the praise, recognition and validation they get from others. I would say they display Pride more as an emotion than a fact of thousands of centuries of accumulated knowledge, history and culture.
· Dark Elves/Drow
I believe dark elves are twisted and evil because their society sees expression as weakness. Imagine being an overly emotive creature and being forced to bottle every single way of expression yourself in order to not be exploited for it. I believe that living a life of constant pent up emotion would twist them into cruelty that they are. This is also where nuance comes in. My headcanon is that Dark Elves have mastered the art of subtle microexpressions and body language
Anonymous No.96503302 [Report] >>96503337
>>96503198
Yeah but like, Numenoreans are men who were 7 feet tall and they were about the same height as elves.
And orcs were giga mallets that barely breached the 5 foot mark.
Anonymous No.96503337 [Report] >>96503453
>>96503302
It's not just the tallness, especially male night elves (yes, I know someone will hate me for bringing them up) are broad, buff and massive.
Love me night elves, and of course male elves can work out and be fit and muscular. But night elves being so jacked really only works within the visual frame of Warcraft.
Anonymous No.96503375 [Report] >>96503436
>>96498752
image hashes, here you go
https://pastebin.com/vHFXBrhT
Anonymous No.96503436 [Report] >>96506284 >>96506338
>>96503375
>that many
What the fuck.
Anonymous No.96503453 [Report] >>96503543
>>96503337
For some weird reason, I have completely forgot that Warcraft elves have beards, but then again...they evolved from trolls..
Anonymous No.96503486 [Report] >>96503538 >>96503622 >>96503722
>>96501857
taking a 7 foot tall purple amazon elf as your wife and domesticating her is extremely hot thoughever
Anonymous No.96503538 [Report] >>96506243
>>96503486
For fuck sake man, just buy a whore.
Anonymous No.96503543 [Report] >>96503563
>>96503453
Modern WoW doesn't like elves having testosterone.
Anonymous No.96503563 [Report]
>>96503543
Modern Wow in general doesn't testosterone
Anonymous No.96503622 [Report] >>96503633 >>96506243
>>96503486
You think salt is spicy don't you.
Anonymous No.96503633 [Report]
>>96503622
nta, but I do ._.
Anonymous No.96503722 [Report] >>96506243
>>96503486
>domesticating
Only elf-haters think elves are property.
Anonymous No.96505157 [Report] >>96506391
>>96500603
>young elf, old elf...
Sure. In some other elf thread I asked what would be the year-on-year odds that an elf dies from an accident to figure out what actually constitutes "old age" for an elf. Flip that on it's head, what's the age that people in thread think an elf should be considered "old", because most elves have died by that age (assuming biological immortality).
Anonymous No.96505461 [Report]
>>96478515
That is one way to tell everyone you are a retard who talks about things you have zero understanding of.
Anonymous No.96505953 [Report] >>96506166
>>96503131
The tallest female elf in LotR is Galadriel and she is 6'4. So, shorter than Night Elves by quite a bit.
Anonymous No.96506094 [Report]
Tall elven women, pushing my head to their hips...
Anonymous No.96506166 [Report]
>>96505953
Tolkien lived in a time when 6'4 was gigantic for a woman and 5'7 average for a man
Anonymous No.96506243 [Report]
>>96503538
>>96503622
>>96503722
t. low test
Anonymous No.96506284 [Report]
>>96503436
That guy is triggered by male elves so this list is actually just a list of all art which shows a male elf
I wonder why he even comes to /tg/ or how he engages with fantasy in general when the most known elves are like Drizzt, Legolas and Dobby
>You know if the elves in HP looked more like humans with pointy ears maybe the fact that slavery is back would get better across?
>But then again it would probably just attract more creeps
Anonymous No.96506338 [Report] >>96506388
>>96503436
He's been at this for almost 2 decades anon. Noldorfag is genuinely an insane person, so you need a comprehensive solution.
Anonymous No.96506388 [Report]
>>96506338
Sad to see.
Anonymous No.96506391 [Report] >>96506507
>>96500803
Just reading and picturing it makes me appreciate the mysterious and somewhat alien perspective of a timeless being you painted.
Real good stuff anon, I'm writing it down for future reference
Maybe even work it into the character as a culture-agnostic natural pull towards elven behavior. I'm keeping him, his time will come.

>>96501355
Got it boss

>>96503272
This explains the artistic side of elves as the creative outlet for emotions
I like your take on elves inheriting they hyperemotional fey trait, makes for fun shenanigans
>High Elves/Sun Elves
Maybe not pride, so much as it's a social emotional mirror thing that the Wood/Wild Elves have?
Instead of environment, they mirror the people around them. If everyone thinks they're amazing, they feel it too!
That would be the reason for opulence and extravagance — to make others look up to them in awe
Instead of touching grass they would bask in approval and praise.
But, conversely, they would seek to silence the critics for the intense low it gives them.
>Dark Elves/Drow
If nothing else, it explains the love of edge, dark colors, and sharp or pointy objects.
They're all means to express the inner turmoil in addition to normal utility

>>96505157
Don't know about the precise age, but methinks it's a similar mortality curve to humans'
It's like that joke — the first hundred years are the most dangerous time in one's life.
Only it applies to elves even more, especially if they are biologically immortal.
For the first 100 years you know fuck-all and are prone to overconfidence and underestimation.
Past that you have some time to reflect and draw conclusions from your lifetime of experience.
Make finer generalizations that the crude ones younger elves and human adults would make.
Honestly, it sort of explains why elves consider anyone under a century a child. Physically they're fully mature, but mentally?
Takes a lifetime to really get a grasp on things and see the long-term trends in world and civilizations.
Anonymous No.96506507 [Report] >>96506519 >>96506687 >>96506839
>>96506391
>They're all means to express the inner turmoil in addition to normal utility
Funny flip - every dark elf has a dedicated personalized screaming pillow

As for the age and their general lifestyle, they way I work around elves being somewhat on par with short lived races is that
· They live life very slowly
Lets say an elf lives for 500 years. My headcannon is that they spend time from 25 to 150 living as we today consider a 20-22 year old. Yes, you are adult, no you're not expected to do anything special, achieve anything, or do anything serious in your life.
· Turning ordinary into extraordinary
Because elves spend hundreds of years doing mundane things, they way they do it should look graceful at least, alien at best. This is where the beauty and finese of elves comes in. They make something as boring and tedious as moping a floor look like a magical spectacle and they do it naturally. It would also be the only way a keen observer can tell an age of an elf based on how gracefully they complete their daily tasks.
· Maintenance culture
Since elves do nothing and work on nothing new, I would say they are masters of preserving any technological feat they achieve, especially the young ones.
>yeah this windmill is still standing after 2500 years
>yeah that chair was made by grandpa Inarion 4000 years ago
>yup, the sword still cuts as new
You could say this is the main reason elf maids are premier slaves
Anonymous No.96506519 [Report] >>96506527 >>96506533
>>96506507
>Anime gif
>Brings up elf slave
Cancer
Anonymous No.96506527 [Report]
>>96506519
Shut up, I'm trying to apply my reasoning to the broader audience (yes I know how that sounds)
Anonymous No.96506533 [Report] >>96506824
>>96506519
It's all so tiresome.
Anonymous No.96506687 [Report] >>96506698 >>96506743 >>96506824
>>96506507
Elf domestic slaves make a lot of sense actually. It would be an obvious status symbol
Anonymous No.96506698 [Report] >>96506743 >>96506797 >>96506824
>>96506687
700 years a slave
Anonymous No.96506743 [Report] >>96506789 >>96506797 >>96506824
>>96506687
>>96506698
At this point the elf just takes over the household and makes the humans slaves
It's like keeping a dragon as a pet, you know a giant firebreathing lizard of superior intelligence and magical power
They deserve to get eaten
Anonymous No.96506763 [Report] >>96506824
Oh boy, we sure didn't have this topic a million times already.
Anonymous No.96506789 [Report] >>96506824
>>96506743
It was basically the plot of a slave elf series.
The princess becomes the shadow ruler of the human kingdom and then coups the state after a few generations becoming the actual open ruler.
Anonymous No.96506797 [Report] >>96506802 >>96506817 >>96506824 >>96506836
>>96506698 >>96506743
I don't think anyone that buys an elf slave is buying a normal slave.
Anyone that does deserves everything they got coming.
A smart, intelligent, and long-lived servant is an investment into the future generations.
You buy an elf, set them down, and hammer out an agreement.
They serve your family in some administrative role, manage the estate, and so on.
In return, they enjoy being treated like a valuable employee, not forced labor.
They really are a status symbol. The better your knife-eared butler looks, the better off you must be.

Using elves for physical labor is beyond stupid. You might as well use halflings in logistics involving tall shelves.
Anonymous No.96506802 [Report] >>96506824 >>96506825
>>96506797
I hope the elf burns down the estate and kills the people in it
Anonymous No.96506817 [Report] >>96506825
>>96506797
>Using elves for physical labor is beyond stupid
Harem Hotel makes it work.
Anonymous No.96506824 [Report]
>>96506802
>>96506797
>>96506789
>>96506763
>>96506743
>>96506698
>>96506687
>>96506533
it took one line of text...ONE LINE OF TEXT TO SET YOU AUTISTS OFF
Anonymous No.96506825 [Report] >>96506831 >>96506854
>>96506802
Only if they're badly mistreated.
A smart one would use it as cover to freeing other elves.
And if the owner isn't opposed to it? They they both could benefit.
Elf sets up an underground railroad, and owner gets top notch stewardship.
The better off the owner, the more slaves he can afford to purchase.
And the more slaves will be freed and sent back to their families.

>>96506817
Sex work and the like are a different kind of labor imo.
Anonymous No.96506831 [Report]
>>96506825
No, in the game elves are often used for hard physical labor like construction. Usually just the men.
This system is propped up through state repression and violence.
Anonymous No.96506836 [Report]
>>96506797
Is sex forced labor?
Anonymous No.96506839 [Report]
>>96506507
>Funny flip - every dark elf has a dedicated personalized screaming pillow
Updated my journ- I mean, my fluff notes for the future. This is too good to pass on.
>a keen observer can tell an age of an elf based on how gracefully they complete their daily tasks
That's actually an interesting bit that might come in handy when dealing with elves.
Anonymous No.96506854 [Report] >>96506966
>>96506825
Slavery sucks no matter how you package it and the only reason it is even popular is because NEETs can't imagine how else anyone could tolerate their mere presence other than being forced to
Anonymous No.96506966 [Report]
>>96506854
Never said it wasn't. Also note that I mentioned establishing a railroad to free more slaves.
>the only reason it is even popular is because NEETs can't imagine how else anyone could tolerate their mere presence other than being forced to
Hits too close to home.
I'd wager it's more about being the one in control and having power over someone.
Less about being tolerated and more about satisfying the need for agency and control.
Anonymous No.96507110 [Report] >>96507192
I guess.
Anonymous No.96507151 [Report]
Fascinating what kinds of pornographic material they leave in the thread, and what not.
Anonymous No.96507192 [Report]
>>96507110
Be he foe or friend, Be he foul or clean, brood of Morgoth or bright Valla, Eldar or Maia or Aftercomer, Man yet unborn upon Middle-Earth, neither law nor love not leave of swords, dread nor danger, not Doom itself, shall defend him from Fëanor, Fëanor's kin, whoso hideth or hoarderth, or in hand taketh, finding keepth or afar casteth a Silmaril.
This swear we all: death we will deal him ere Day's ending, woe unto world's end! Our word hear thou, Eru Allfather! To the everlasting Darkness doom us if our deed faileth.
On the holy mountain hear in witness and our vow remember, Manwë and Varda!