>Now call me Master, bitch

>>211401163 (OP)
>Are you kidding me?
>I just won the Boonta Eve Classic
>I beat Sebulba
>That's the equivalent of some ten year-old kid beating Roger Federrer at Wimbledon and then leaving tennis forever to become a priest
>I'm rolling in prize money right now my guy
>I've got my own kick-ass pod I built myself
>There's 2 Twi'lek groupies in the next room waiting to suck my dick
>I mean I was all into Padme because she's the only other woman I've met besides my mom but there's like a 10-year age gap there
>Doubt that would end well for me, haha
>Besides I'm force-sensitive too and I just have this super bad feeling something shitty will happen if I go with that Obi-Wan guy
>Why the would I want to join your gay little organization?
>I'm going pro, dude
>I'm gonna be a motherfucking podracer and never see your ass again

>>211401163 (OP)
Is this why Anakin was seething so hard about not being made a Master Jedi? So hard that he chimped out and killed everyone?

>>211401163 (OP)
To be member of some kind of "space monks" is totally the same as being a slave. I mean, as a slave, you can rise ranks, become educated and larn cool things like let things fly with your mind.
Totally the same.

>>211401163 (OP)
>Be Padme
>That nice boy just won you your future and future of the planet
>Didnt even think about freeing his mom using the pocket change

Why did Anakin even fall in love with her? Buying out Anakin's mom as soon as Naboo was freed was pretty much a fucking given thing for any normal person in her situation.

>>211401448
>but there's like a 10-year age gap there
no not the heckin problematic age gap

>>211403831
20 and 30 isn't problematic
30 and 40 isn't problematic
10 and 20 is problematic

>>211403695
Woman moment

>>211404135
>
no not the hecking problematic age gap

>>211403831
oh hi Jeffrey

>>211404387
>epstein ahh blud diddy gyatt

Why did we never even see Qui gon actually train Anakin? He just parked him somewhere and went on to do his on thing. Kind of a shitty move.

rewatching this in HD because /tv/ never stops talking about star wars for the first time since I had it on VHS as a kid had me watching how bad the hairpiece on liam neeson is the whole time. It's worse than the maul glued spikes sometimes, but it also makes me wish they made samuel l jackson do it too so it would look even more ridiculous

>>211401163 (OP)
I like when he gaslit Obi-wan by telling him "you are far wiser a Jedi than I could ever be" *snigger snigger*

At the end of the movie, Anakin is a padawan but he's clearly the same age as before and the whole scene plays out very shortly after the final battle. And yet Anakin sports the signature padawan braid and it's quite long, much longer in fact than his hair should have been able to grow in the timespan.

So it begs the question: Where does the hair come from? Does becoming a padawan magically reinforce your hair growth capabilities? If yes, why are Qui Gon balding and Sam Jackson bald? Or did the Jedi just glue extensions to his head? Is this not even his own hair? Did they order it in India or from the Philippines like black people do?

There is nothing wrong with a little man/child master/slave routine

>>211404634
Yeah dude he should have sat him down and ran through the jedi syllabus while in an active war zone

>>211405317
Did we ever actually see any war on Naboo? They seem to have fought their entire war on an open plain like it was 1740. The city was totally untouched. The droids didn't go and carpet bomb the entire population of Naboo city.

>>211403695
Buy her with what? Republic Credits? You'd have better luck trying to buy slaves in modern day Somalia with bitcoin

>>211405053
your hair grows faster than you age

>>211402929
>Totally the same.
Can't love or have families. They're monks, bro.

>>211407134
It would take over a year for his hair to grow to such lenghts and the victory parade at the end is clearly not a year after the final battle.

>>211403695
>Didnt even think about freeing his mom using the pocket change
She did but Lars bought Schmi already, so she bought every other slave and freed them.

>>211403695
If anakin's mom was around how was she gonna get that dick?

>>211401163 (OP)
Kek, never thought of it like that

i just watched ep 1 and i'm halfway through 2 and holy shit 2 is so much worse

>>211401163 (OP)
>Yes Anakin you will be free but your mother will have to stay a slave and get raped and murdered by the natives of this planet because it will build character or however the force works

>>211405053
in the novelization obiwan cuts his off and weaves it into anakins hair

>>211403695
Thats valid. I'd probably get it if Padme was portrayed as socipathic careless bitch, but Lucas certainly wanted to convey the kind and caring person with her portrayal.
Freeing Shmi's mom the next day by sending some people on Naboo would be one of her first decision.
Her not doing that for 10 years is OOC moment.
Lucas is a fucking hack.