Zounds, sir! I shan't permit thine wanton wassails against mine own household. Thenceforth, if thou canst but refrain in swith from such ill-begotten verbage, I shouldst be most inclined to engage in such sanguinary as to reave this night asunder! Mayhap this magdalen thou lampoons couldst be of a loathly sort, howbeit, further insult would only hasten thine expiry! Verily, mine espousal be not a sheath for thine bodkin!

Will Smith seems like the type of guy to keep a derringer in his sock. If he had pulled it out and shot her in the head right then and there no one would have batted an eye. In fact I could see his whole life having a comeback.