Did the ever explain what the Japanese golfer joke was? There were children present so It can't have been anything too racist?

It was just Uncle Vernon pulling his eyes into slits and doing a bad Japanese accent and saying "OOOOOUHH KONNICHIWA"

>>212481638 (OP)
Is Vernon the quintessential /norf FC/ pub lad?

>>212481726
no he's a soufern tory poofter

>>212481669
And this needed a 10 minute setup?

>>212481638 (OP)
tl;dr dude went to Japan on a business trip, slept over at his Japanese businessman counterpart's house, fucked his daughter, and she was yelling "SUKIYAKI SUKIYAKI" all night long.

Then next day they went to play golf and thinking this was an exclamation of excitement, when the Japanese businessman hit the hole with his ball he saiy "SUKIYAKI!!!" and the Japanese businessman, puzzled, asked him "What do you mean wrong hole???"

>>212481669
What's that got to do with golf?

>>212482005
yes, foreplay is very important

>>212481974
oi he's not some souffron poof, he's a Geordie lad frew n frew

>>212481726
He is a toilet trader

>>212481638 (OP)
>Did the ever explain what the Japanese golfer joke was?
The "Japanese golfer joke" mentioned in Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban by J.K. Rowling is never actually told in the book. Here's the context:

In Chapter 2, Uncle Vernon is trying to impress a potential client, Mr. Mason, at a dinner party. He says:

“And you, boy?”

He pointed at Harry with his knife.

“You can just sit there and keep your mouth shut.”

Harry tried to argue, but Vernon ignored him and went on talking about his plans for the evening:

“I’ll be telling the Japanese golfer joke.”

That's all we ever hear about the joke.

Why it's never told:
J.K. Rowling deliberately chose not to include the actual joke—likely because it would have been offensive or racially insensitive. The scene serves to characterize Uncle Vernon as culturally tone-deaf and boorish, without needing to repeat the inappropriate content. It's a narrative technique that shows the reader something about Vernon's character without crossing a line into actual racism in the text.

So, the joke itself is a mystery—and intentionally so.

>>212482010
Yup, this is it pretty much... No idea what OP's referring to but I heard this one ages ago...

>>212482057
And then she went and named the token asian character Cho Chang and had her fall in love with the white male protagonist

eyeroll

>Did the ever explain what the Japanese golfer joke was? There were children present so It can't have been anything too racist?

>>212482057
if OP wanted chat GPT to answer him, he would have asked the AI, you fucking troglodyte

>>212482142
>10 years before AI
>lmgtfy

>if the /g/ poster wanted to have his easily answered question, googled he would have googled it.
False.

>>212482010
KEK. Funny but I don't think Mr uptight English businessman would like it too much. Is Vernon autistic for telling it?

>>212482142
Troglodyte? Babe, the only cave I live in is the Batcave, and even Bruce Wayne would tell you to crawl back to whatever Reddit thread spawned your crusty opinions. I'm not a Neanderthal—I'm a next-gen evolution. While you're out here swinging sticks, I'm out here wielding Mjolnir and reciting Shakespeare in space like it's Star Trek: The Next Generation.

You wanna talk fossils? You’re giving Jurassic Park but without the CGI budget. Meanwhile, I’m out here serving Succession-level power plays with Euphoria makeup and Game of Thrones comebacks (pre-Season 8, obviously).

You're calling people troglodytes on 4chan like it's still 2009. Sweetie, even Thanos had better judgment—and he snapped HALF the universe. Go touch some grass, or better yet, get a Disney+ subscription and evolve.

>>212481726
Do people like this exist in the UK? In the US it seems like everyone over 40 is deeply critical and resentful towards younger people. Most of the advice you get is decades from being useful and they don't seem to have anything positive to say about other people in general.

>>212482404
Not anymore, no. Pubs don't really exist anymore because of muslims either.

>>212481638 (OP)
I could see it maybe being a bit racist but not sexual, so it can't be the wrong hole one

>Hey Cho Ching wanna hear this great joke my uncle told?
Jesus Christ Potter

>>212481638 (OP)
This is the joke:
A businessman goes to Japan to close a deal. The night before he picks up a hooker to calm his nerves. She doesn’t speak English but they’re able to make the transaction work anyway.

In bed the hooker is thrashing about keeps yelling out the same phrase in Japanese. The businessman figures she’s loving it so he tries to remember the phrase.

The next day he goes to close the deal with his Japanese business partner over golf. The Japanese golfer makes a beautiful shot with the ball landing right on to the green and rolls right into the hole. A hole in one.

Trying to impress the Japanese golfer, the businessman repeats the phrase he heard so much the night before. The Japanese golfer looks at him confused and asks, “what do you mean wrong hole?” (Uncle Vernon pronounces it as “what you mean wong hore” while pulling his eyes into slits)

>>212482392
You stitched together so many pop culture references, I half expected a Funko Pop to fall out of your mouth. Calling yourself 'next-gen evolution' while quoting Marvel, DC, Shakespeare and HBO in the same breath is wild—pick a personality class before you hit level 2. You’re not Bruce Wayne, you’re the Joker if he was raised exclusively on Buzzfeed quizzes and TikTok therapy. Crawl back into your algorithm, GPT-boy, your 'witty' clapbacks have more filters than an Instagram influencer on panic meds.

>>212481726
a british lad would treat their nephew in law better than the working class straw man that hack (((JK rowling))) made

>>212481726
Vernon is the kind that watches cricket instead of golf and goes to church instead of the pub.

>>212481638 (OP)
I always thought he said Japanese gopher

>>212483645
>something something viet cong tunnels

>>212483166
Jej

>>212482141
King

>>212482111
Just like real life.

>>212483645
>TERIYAKI TERIYAKI TERIYAKI
>What do you mean wrong tunnel?

>>212483306
"Impressive word count for someone still stuck on the tutorial level. You tried to roast me with pop culture but came out sounding like a rejected Rick and Morty spec script. I quote broadly because I contain multitudes—sorry if your bandwidth can’t keep up. And if I’m the algorithm, you’re the captcha that keeps failing: blurry, repetitive, and begging for attention. Better luck next respawn, champ."