>Oh, you hear that, guys?
>This huge space station with a planet destroying death ray is totally "insignificant" compared to his amazing powers
>Well I guess we can all go home then, huh?
>'Cause it sounds like Vader here doesn't need our help
>He's going to choke out the entire population of Alderran one by one apparently
>Guess you don't need us, I'll just move the whole fleet to Exegol and sit underground for a few decades waiting for the Emperor to call
>Yeah, just demolish the whole Death Star guys, pack it in
>This massive thing we've spent years building is totally useless according to Lord Dumbass over here
>Stupid goddamn dipshit, do you even realize how fucking retarded you sound?

I miss dialogue like this.

>>212704625 (OP)
To be fair, he did have point.
There was that unfortunate business with the farm boy flying in and using the force later on.

>>212704625 (OP)
>Lord Vader, I find it highly innapropiate of you to bring up religion during a meeting.

>>212704625 (OP)
>>212704658
>>212704881
>>212706619
Gentleman, gentleman *tink* *tink*.
Please, let us have a toast!

A toast on our fully operational battle station made by the finest scientific minds and engineers of the empire. A toast to absolutely real battle station that is more real than Lord Vader's fairytale live action role play club
>Sips

Sith Lord! That's my name! You know why, acolyte? You piloted a Z-95 Headhunter to get here. I piloted an 80,000,000 credit R&D Tie-Advanced that's parked right outside. THAT'S my name! And your name is you're low on the midichlorian count. You can't play in the sith game, you can't choke them... then go home and tell your twilek sex slave your troubles. Because only one thing counts in this life: Get them to gasp on the breath which is asphyxiated. You hear me, you fucking jizz wailers? A-B-C. A... Always, B... Be, C... Choking. Always be choking. ALWAYS BE CHOKING! P-P-S-J Force Pull, Force Push, Force Speed, Force Jump. Push: Have I pushed you in the right direction? Pull: Are you pulled towards your goal? Speed: Are you going to learn fast? I know you are 'cause it's Choke or get your Sith pushed in. You choke or out the window and you hit the Coruscant pavement. Jump? Are you going to jump as high as the Emperor wants you to? Get out there! You've got the force sensitives coming in. You think they came in here to get out of the rain? A force sensitive doesn't walk into the temple lest he wants to learn. They're sitting out there waiting for you to show them the Dark side of the Force. Are you gonna show them? Are you Sith enough to choke them?

>>212704881
Technically a photon torpedo destroyed it, the Force barely did anything
If Luke had used his mind to crush the Death Star like an empty pop can BEFORE it destroyed Leia's whole planet, then I would say the Force was more powerful than the Death Star.

>>212704625 (OP)
fuckin kek

>>212704625 (OP)
>chokes u

>>212704625 (OP)
Do you guys think if he had survived the Death star explosion (maybe because he was somewhere else then) he would have taken a bigger piss on Darth Vader?

>>212704625 (OP)
He didnt say that

>>212708016
Vader would try to convince him the Force destroyed the Death Star
>'Luke used the Force to destroy the Deh Star. I was there.'
>'And I watched him fly an X-Wing and fire into an exhaust port. Is the Force shaped like an X-Wing, Lord Vader?'

>This is admiral biatch to basecamp, it seems the stormtroopers have gone on strike and I have no experience with this type of shit. Who should I call for help?

vader can force chock a guy just through a videocall which is pretty impressive

>>212704625 (OP)
it would make for better stories if the stupid space samurais got shot in the face more often instead of being invincible like some dragon ball Z characters
except that part of episode 3 where they all become normal people for a second
maybe it does happen more in the new movies and shows, idk

>>212708139
Bob Fett

>>212704625 (OP)
>this guy dies to Luke using the force when everyone who didn't failed
>doesn't manage to manifest after death
>gone forever

>Vader dies
>uses the force to live on after death
>his will continues to manifest forever
Immortality trumps the ability to kill things, sorry.

>>212708149
They could hide a microcamera somewhere a target goes and have him do a remote kill.
>>212708158
there is a gun whose shots they cannot deflect with lighsabers, I forgot the name is a sort of shotgun that shoots melting bullets, don't think they ever appeared in the movies/tv series though.

>>212707804
It helped him aim. before that, Luke couldnt hit it for shit.

>>212708158
>>212708248
>pick up a 12 gauge
>load buckshot
>dumb space peasents have never see weapon that can fire a projectile, whatever that dumb laser? shit is over 200 fps
>blow away jedi and plastic armor wearing soilders left and right
>rule the galaxy in a month

>>212706952
AH! It sure is great still having my human limbs.
>sips

>That Force aint so good when someone has the HIGHGROUND EH?

>>212708518
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UPeI4mX8Nus

I literally just posted a pic of this guy before with no text and it hit the bump limit.

>>212708228
Tell that to everyone on Alderran
>>212708431
He used to blast wamp rats all the time with his T-16 back home, he was a great shot

>>212704625 (OP)
I'll never forgive George for replacing this part in the re-releases.

>>212708643
the force helped him hit them too.

>>212704625 (OP)
For no reason at all these guys are totally cool that Vader is their universe's equivalent of a Satanist with telekinetic powers. And nearly all their upper leadership is in the cult, too. This isn't the kind of detail that would go unnoticed.

>>212708755
Didn't Hitler give Himmler a bunch of funding and power that he didn't deserve just because he was a schitzo /x/ lurker?

>>212707972
>*ack* Whatever.... dude
>We all *uck* know you used to-
>*erk* hang out with...
>Jar Jar *ick* Binks

>>212708967
>I hear your mother was REAL popular with those sandpeople.

>>212708133
>The Force moves in mysterious ways, and yes, it can come in the form of an X-Wing and a proton torpedo.
>Disagree and I'll choke you again

>>212708818
I think the fat fuck Goering was also favored because he was a WW1 hero.
>>212709144
Imagine becoming a Jedi just so you can see Vader and talk shit about him for what he did to your family/planet.

for me it's the dude in RoTJ that manages the death star 2 construction and receives Vader in the hangar because he gets an entire mini-arc in the novelization about how he sees himself an ice cold imperial gigachad that has it all figured out

>>212704625 (OP)
Fucking Vader and his sorcerous ways.

>>212708755
they kinda aren't in the first movie. They just see Vader as Tarkins goon. They hadn't even decided if the emperor was supposed to be a evil mastermind or a useless puppet to the military in 1977

>>212709144
>>212709187
>>212709199
>Okay but what if we could somehow make the Death Star spin?
>No hear me out, let's try it
>I hear it's a, uh... a really good trick

>>212709446
>Yippee!

Couldn’t Vader read the room? Doesn’t he know that bringing up religion or politics during work makes people uncomfortable?

>Hey
>Heeeeey Anakin, I know you can hear me
>Ani, hey Ani!
>Why you always ignoring me, man?
>You gonna let him talk to you like that?
>You gonna let him talk shit about the force?
>Choke his ass out, Anakin
>Yeah that's right, show him who's boss
>Who's the BEE-YOTCH now, huh?
>Nice
>Now let's get the fuck out of here and go watch some podracing videos
>Fuckin' love podracing

>Lord Vader, I've been told that you requisitioned thousands of remote probes for a "search mission".
>Out of curiosity's sake, is this about the hidden Rebel base, or about your long lost son?
>If the Force is truly so great, why don't you use it to find him? Are probe droids more powerful than a blood bond between a father and a son?

>>212709909
>the only reason Anakin does bad shit throughout the films is because he's haunted by an invisible Qui-Gon nobody else can see and it slowly drives him insane
kek

>>212709909
kek

>>212704625 (OP)
>>Oh, you hear that, guys?
>>This huge space station with a planet destroying death ray is totally "insignificant" compared to his amazing powers
>>Well I guess we can all go ho

>Shut the fuck up, you burnt cripple
Sometimes I think Admiral Motti was a little harsh toward Vader.

>>212709909
Read it in Leam Neeson's voice

>>212708149
Wouldn't it be as effective if Vader just used the dark side to milk their prostates? Try doubting the power of the force while you have a wad of cum soaking through your trousers. Can the death star make you cum in your pants? I think not.

>>212704625 (OP)
Someone post the Hadouken greentext.

>>212710864

>>212710700
That would be sexual assault and Vader does not condone such behavior.

>>212704625 (OP)
>Read it in his voice
All but the last line are like straight out of a Mitchell and Webb sketch

>>212709909
Do you think he still pisses himself as a force ghost?

>>212704625 (OP)
>then gets choked to death
I think murder is a pretty good comeback from Vader

>>212708158
>it would make for better stories if the stupid space samurais got shot in the face more

they do get shot at in the face very often in the sw universe its usually only the elite fighters who dont.

>>212709909

Kek

>jedi order travel around as knights and mediators
>work openly, cool swords, magic powers
>get killed by palpatine
>20 years later force users are treated like scam fortune tellers
yeah ok bro