>>212970251 (OP)A big part of Tony's character is being socially adroit and charismatic enough to operate in a tonne of different environments, but not being fully at home in any of them.
He's become too genuinely upper class and absorbed too much of that culture and its sensibilities to truly be himself around the other mobsters. To an extent what he's like at satriallis or the Bing is a persona he puts on, or at the very least an incomplete version of himself.
I didn't pick up on this myself but I saw this great discussion of the episode where he warns meadows black jewish boyfriend not to go out with her. He passes out immediately afterwards. As soon as the guy is gone. And its because of this tension. Because there's this tension between the values and cultural rules he's absorbed since moving up in the world, and the values and cultural mores he's supposed to have, that his father would expect him to have and beat his ass if he didn't. So he has to make himself go against his own instincts and morality such as it is. He has to make himself be Johnny boy and cross these lines against this kid who, while annoying, has done absolutely nothing wrong(this is one of those days where he has a conscience and doesn't want to feel like total scum.) He forces himself against his instincts to be this character, at his fancy suburban home surrounded by his dentist neighbours, not out in mob world, and tank the subconscious stress of breaking these quite deeply internalized rules, and the stress of it is so overwhelming he literally faints the second he's in the clear.