New kino just dropped

>>213389570 (OP)
a remake again?

>>213389570 (OP)
Nothing beats the 2005 one

>>213389570 (OP)
Release the humans. Earth has the right to defend itself.

>>213389570 (OP)
Amazon commercial

>>213389570 (OP)
Nothing beats the 1953 one

>>213389613
Except for the 1953 one you Cruiseslopping imbecile.

Radio drama > book > 2005 movie > nothing > all the post 2005 adaptations

>>213389570 (OP)
Nothing beats the The Mercury Theatre on the Air 1938 radio episode

>>213389675
>50s slop
Yawn

>>213389570 (OP)
The chances of anything decent coming from Amazon are a million to one

>>213389613
2005 falls off as soon as the opening act concludes. Nothing cool happens after that and it becomes annoying.

>>213389675
>no fucking tripods
One job

>>213389731
The first media chuds were born that day.

>>213389570 (OP)
Shit, I thought that was Jordan Peele, it's actually Ice Cube lmao

>>213390231
Who else but Ice Cube could play an elite NSA hacker?

Honestly, if this wasn't called War of the Worlds and didn't star Ice Cube, it would have been an ok sci-fi flick.

>>213389570 (OP)
can't wait for the youtubeslop

>>213389570 (OP)
>clicks inspect element on your post
>finds your ip and doxes you
how do you respond?

>>213389570 (OP)
>#1 movie on Amazon steaming right now
Are people just that dumb or are streaming metrics just that deceptive?

>>213391417
the movie is hilariously bad and i'd understand why people want to watch it

>>213389682
I believe you're forgetting something, anon.

>>213391278
That's a fucking joke

>>213389570 (OP)
Funniest movie of the year, nobody is topping this.

>>213391417
Boy ain't no watch watching that damn movie

>>213391417
Both

It must be really bad if it gets 0% on a site that gives every other movie 90%

Giving the bum a $1000 Amazon Gift card was priceless. Rodrick rules!

>>213390231
>"ok i don't really like remakes with raceswap but if Jeffrey Wright is in, it might be somehow decent"
>check your post
>it's really ice cube

I got the biggest laugh alone in my room

>>213389570 (OP)
Racism!

TAKE YOUR INTERGALACTIC ASSES BACK HOME

>>213389570 (OP)
What did he know

>>213389570 (OP)
This cannot be worse than Gravekeepers 2.

>>213393937
Damn, I even forgot the name was Grave Encounters 2, thanks brain but is not needed.

>>213389570 (OP)
saw the trailer. it's boring.

>>213391278
I'd simply backtrace his backtrace. Recursion programming loop, bitches. Even the best AI can't calculate my secure proxy.

>>213391417
The new meta is releasing "so bad it's good" movies for the meme lolster crowd aka zoomers

>>213389570 (OP)
For a moment I thought this was Laurence Fishburne

>>213391278
I have a tracebuster buster, I'd be daijoubu.

>>213389570 (OP)
But is it fun bad, or slop bad?

I rater watch again Tom Cruise running than dough- boy yapping shit about Martians being racist
Who tough this cast would work?

>>213391278
>tfw my IP is b43osedgoj346f4gzg

>>213389675
>Film: :|
>Film, 1950s: :o

The Amazon drone sequence is one of the most unbelievable attempts at a climax.
>"GO LEFT ON HAN SOLO"
>"Give him an amazon gift card for $1000"
>"Hey Mark. Protect that sweet baby drone"
>"Move bitch! Get out the way"
>"Do a barrel roll"

FAREWELL THUNDERCHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIILD

>>213396693
Unwatchable bad.

>>213393517
We got too cocky Briggsisters

>>213389570 (OP)
I don't understand how people can watch bad stuff like this.
I just get bored

>>213389570 (OP)
Why in the FUCK is it that there are, TO DATE, 0 (zero) book-accurate adaptations of War of the Worlds?
If it isn't a fucking "modern day" bullshit retelling it's an absolute fucking disaster that changes shit nonetheless.
The only decent adaptation is a goddamned music album by Jeff Wayne.
The fucking book is paced like a goddamned miniseries. All somebody has to do is follow the fucking thing JUST ONCE GOD FUCKING DAMMIT
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4RRe40O6QKU

NOT POEMS AND RUBBISH
BUT SCIENCE

>>213389613
>>213389675
Great sound design in both of these

>>213390054
>Nothing cool happens after that
I'm pretty sure everyone still remembers the ferryboat scene. And the burning train scene before it.

>>213398021
My favorite tripod design is from League of Extraordinary Gentlemen. The tripods are lore accurate and have all the weapons from the invisible combustion ray to black smoke. Only difference in lore is that the martians are invading Earth because John Carters army of real martians were driving them away after years of war.

>>213391278
someone get piratesoftware to paintsplain this

>>213391278
no fucking way

>>213391278
Reminds me when in Netflix Strong Astronaut Woman sci-fi show had aliens morse code JPG-file color numbers to scientists to communicate with them. Luckily the aliens didn't know what CMYK is or the scientists may have needed a proper printer.

War of the Worlds is fucking retarded anyway
>oh no alien invasion!
>wew, its a good thing this interstellar-capable species never heard of bacteria :^)

>>213398384
>misses the entire point of the novel
This site really is fucking retarded children isn't it

>>213396693
It’s “don’t waste your time” bad.
“Ice Cube just making money enough to remodel his kitchen at the expense of your life minutes” bad.

>>213391278
This is an insult to anyone who knows what an IP address is.

Maybe Ice Cube truly is crazy as fuck to do these bad movies

>>213391278
wut, the fuck does this have to do with war of the worlds?

>>213389613
I know people here shit on the 2005 movie and a lot of it deserves to be, but I really liked that scene where the tripod appears on the hill, snaps the tree and everyone turns around at the sound before panicking
https://youtu.be/-V3Iqd3WbVg?t=89

>>213398483
It was fine for what it was, but by God I want a good version of this story in the setting in which it was written.
Just fucking one good adaptation, after a goddamned century of not a single fucking one.

>>213389675
1953 > 2005 yup
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kDnim_yyLug

The alien war machine sounds are a whole movie by themselves.

>>213389675
Movies didn’t get good till the 60’s

>the 2005 movie is bad because...uh...because it is!
Film people are so fucking stupid it's unreal
Same reason they hated Tim Burtons Chocolate Factory despite the fact it hardmogged the awful 70s one, it was because it was new and different to the one they saw as a kid

>>213398549
What the fuck are you talking about? 2005 and the 1953 adaptations are the only passable film versions and nobody's saying they aren't.
Everybody's just saying it's not enough. There hasn't been a single legitimately good and accurate adaptation of this century old book, and bafflingly there's no excuse for it.
A fucking rock opera did it. Why couldn't a single film production company do it?

>>213398384
>super advanced vaxmaxxed species eradicated disease on their planet
>invade earth, inject human blood directly into their veins
>catch AIDS and die

>>213398395
Didn't you see them shilling superman and fantastic 4? It's worse than children: it's millennial adults.

>>213398549
Prime bait. Almost had me. But you know the answer is less is more.

>>213398637
>it's bait to actually watch and enjoy films on their own merits instead of just going "new bad"

>>213391278
Reminds me of the Bones episode where somebody uploades malware from a bone onto medical computers via a scan

The 2005 movie is kino up until the bunker part. Instead of adapting the part about the soldier who thinks he can build a city underground, they make him some fat slob schizo that won't shut up. They could've had a better reason to kill him, like he wanted to use the little girl to repopulate.
After that and the part where they blow up the tripod, the movie just sort of ends like a 3rd act is missing entirely.

>>213398646
Almost got me again responding disingenuously with a strawman. The original willy wonka is a perfect movie with some of the best low budget sets ever made. Every actor is perfect and the entire first 20 minutes of detached news reels is absolutely amazing world building and setup. Meanwhile the Burton movie is over the top baby CGI trash. It's a complete step down. Here's my strawman, I bet you defend capeshit lmao.

>>213398707
He's just throwing the pole into the water

>>213398571
>Everybody's just saying it's not enough. There hasn't been a single legitimately good and accurate adaptation of this century old book, and bafflingly there's no excuse for it.
Theres the canadian fake WW1 documentary one, thats pretty good.
https://youtu.be/bERNcnaT-ko?si=W081UAv9jLuQpeYh

Everything Robbie (the son) does in the 2005 movie was retarded.
Why the fuck did he rush over the hill to join the military when they were counterattacking the tripods? I heard they cut part of that scene where the military manages to take down one of the tripods, so I guess that would have made a little sense with that added, but it still would have been fucking retarded. He was unarmed and just completely neglected his sister... for what purpose? Dad and son reuniting at the end was also completely undeserved.

>>213398777
It was a metaphor for young men throwing their lives away to avenge 9/11

>>213389570 (OP)
>>213389613
>no thunderchild
The absolute state.

>>213398847
At least there's a boat scene.

>>213398542
Disagree. Have you seen the 1930-something Robin Hood? It's actually really good, somehow shot in colour, and is probably the best Robin Hood movie IMO. No cope.

>>213398542
what a retarded zoomer opinion. so the entire golden age of hollywood movies has no value whatsoever to you? every single movie in the 30s through the 50's is bad?

>>213389613
2005 war of the worlds is ok, but the whole thing about the alien pods being buried underground the whole time was retarded. then then aliens shoot down into the pods from lighting strikes?

>>213399039
>every single movie in the 30s through the 50's is bad
Yeah.

>>213399093
I bet you've seen so many movies from then too

Surprised so many of the films skip the 2 scariest Martian weapons entirely, heat rays being invisible and the black smoke. Yeah they're overpowered and mean that you can't have cool scenes of characters narrowly escaping a Tripod but it would also make Tripods just way scarier when they have an effective AoE death zone around them.

While invisible heat ray doesn't look as bombastic, its way creepier when a weird tentacle comes up, a light snaps in it like it just took a photograph and suddenly all living things in front of it are on fire. Thats the one thing that was silly with the 2005 adaptation, tripods essentially using railguns to snipe random civilians, just because Tom Cruise can't run away a lore-accurate heat ray that just instantly sets every civilian in front of the gun on fire.

>>213391278
You know the answer

>>213399140
this picture looks like something from mars attacks

>>213392238
>>213398021
based

>>213399186
Well, where do you think the inspiration came from

>>213399236
the bible

>>213389594
As opposed to another original? Nevermind you're right. Give us another original! I want rednecks shooting at water towers all over again!

Its sort of like invasion of the body snatchers, where each remake is worse then the previous one

>>213399186
Funnily enough the War of the Worlds comic book took that visual idea from League of Extraordinary Gentlemen comic.

>>213391278
He'll never hack the Gibson.

>>213399117
They're all just people in a room talking

>>213399687
That's how movies work yeah.

>>213389570 (OP)
What would blacks be doing in the case of an alien invasion other than looting? Blacks loot at the drop of a hat so unless the movie is about looting it's unrealistic.

>>213398427
Id still say hes one of the better rappers turned actors. Ice T and 50 cent cant act for shit

>>213398240
The Martians from the Scarlet Traces series aren't bad either, but that series is more of a steampunk continuation of the first

>>213392238
Come on, Thunder Child!

>>213399939
forgot pic

>>213389812
they said

>>213400049
The leg design doesn't allow a whole lot sideways movement.

>>213389570 (OP)
>War of the Worlds... again
>with Ice Cube
From Straight Outta Compton to Straight Outta Budget.

>>213400119
The Martians' tripods weren't very agile in the original book, remember, the British army managed to blow some up with artillery.
If the tripod could move sideways quicky they wouldn't have been hit by late 19th-century cannons

Yeah....I'm gonna need to watch this kino.

This is really weird to me because I just recently decided to listen to the original War of The Worlds radio broadcast from the 30's that drove people insane, which was pretty interesting. But while I was listening to that Ice Cube was making this version of it. I'm just very confused

>>213400769
>tagline is: its worse then you think
my sides

Why did they film the entire movie like a Microsoft teams meeting? Were they actively trying to create a piece of shit movie?

>>213389613
outside of the tripods scenes, you have a movie about:

> a deadbeat dad
> a useless annoying, screaming little girl
> a pain in the ass teenage son who's almost seems to be committed to getting the three of them killed
> a story very loosely based on the book it's based on

i was actually rooting for at least the kids to die

>>213400955
It was shot during the pandemic when everyone was doing zoom meetings and it’s a screenlife movie just like unfriended

>>213401093
I hate it, get it away from me

>>213389613
The radio broadcast is the definitive way to experience the story

>>213389675
>no tripods
>colour injection
>much church saves everyone

The 50s one sucks

>>213400769
kino indeed
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=104fUNBeqcY

>>213398777
>>213398810

That's funny because that scene resounded with me as a teenager, I saw him as a hero. Everybody else is running away, meanwhile these brave men in Humvees and tanks are charging in the opposite direction, sacrificing themselves just buy time for the fleeing civilians. Is that not the ultimate male fantasy?

While yes I recognized it was retarded for a civilian to join a literal combat maneuver, or in this case a classic WW2 style german death ride. There's no way they would have let him join, it was the thought that counted. Desperate counterattacks are kino. I felt so proud of those guys and so did he, which is why he tried to join them.

What's the matter liberals? Can't handle good cinema? Your gender?

>>213391278
they knew they were making bullshit like this and baiting people exactly like you.

>>213389613
Mogged by scary movie 4

>>213398702
>They could've had a better reason to kill him, like he wanted to use the little girl to repopulate.

Naw i like it the way it is. The part where tom cruise murders a dude in cold blood for the crime of wanting to fight the aliens to the death is one of the most raw and brutal depictions of killing in a movie. The schizo wanting to rape the girl makes the kill too clean and justified. I prefer the morally greyness of the original scene.

I don't watch any movies before 1970 anymore. Those have just not aged that well. There are maybe 10 I like.

>>213389570 (OP)
It's an amazing movie in a sense that the protag is a heinous glowie who is straightforward presented as a good guy with a few quirks.
Even what goes as rebellion just takes over a few drones and gets a glimpse at the infrastructure glowies have

>>213401667
>old stuff is bad
>endless remakes and sequels like Jurassic world 7 are good

>>213399140
Ya its crazy that one of the absolute coolest sci fi weapons was though up in the 1890s. Is there anymovie that has ever done the idea of the realistic heatray justice?

>>213396979
Wait is the whole thing just an amazon ad? kek

>>213401667
I actually want you to die.

>>213391278
>right click
>page source
>opens up a pdf saved on your computer
>copy a random string of characters that obviously isn't an i.p address

heh nothing personal kid

>>213401667
>There are maybe 10 I like

Which 10? I mostly agree with you but from Fritz Langs M to Star wars in 1977 there are probably 100 movies that I like. Every once and a while you stumble on an ancient movie like Casablanca that influenced movies for generations to come

>>213391278
Chat is this real?
Can people really dox me by right clicking on my youtube videos that I upload???

>>213389570 (OP)
One good thing is that now we know you cant just slap the "monitor" concept on any story and "make it work". The story needs to be intended to be told this way from the ground up in order for it to work.

>>213398240
>literally steals the alien design from Independence Day

Kek, nothing personal Roland

>>213398542
movies from the 40's and 50's are much better then the 2020's have been so far. current year is the worst time for film since the advent of sound

>>213396693
very bad, it's nearly unwatchable. Unless you like PowerPoint presentations and occasionally closeups of Ice Cube's face

And what of good Goliath?

>>213402202
>Unless you like PowerPoint presentations and occasionally closeups of Ice Cube's face

Wait... is this one of those single location movies??

>>213389570 (OP)
Wogs of The World, more like.

>>213403034
There's not even a location, 95% of the movie is on a screen with "cam footage". I'm convinced Ice Cube did not leave his house for any part of the "filming"

>>213403426
It was filmed during the covid lockdowns

>>213403638
Why did it take five years to come out?

>>213403671
because it was so bad theyve been trying to fix it in editing all this time. but they gave up and let it come out anyways

>>213403718
This

>>213391278

>>213399687
>They're all just people in a room talking
CHICKEN JOCKEY!!!!

>>213399687
yeah, everyone should be starring at their phones and not talking. kill yourself

Thank you Amazon™ for saving us from the aliens

>>213401059
>all the things you described
huh, almost as if a certain director found a niche hard to kick...
patterns...oh my patterns