>And Harry Potter catches the snitch! The actual score is irrelevant! Gryffindor wins!

And that's why only men and transwomen come up with sports.

>>213493361
>only men and men
huh??

AKSHUALLY the snitch was worth like 200 points and insta ended the game. It’s possible to catch the snitch and still lose if you were behind in points

>made Quidditch illogical on purpose because she got annoyed with her boyfriend’s interest in sports
>suddenly very invested in womens’ sports

>>213493465
Its worth 100. I know cause I autistically loved the PS2 Quidditch World Cup game and had a few games where I scored over 100 in the points difference without it and still won.

>>213493525
Its 150 I bet you feel real dumb now.

>>213493318 (OP)
How does this make any sense? Just drop the game with the entire team and go assist the snitch catcher.

>>213493465
No one would forcefully end a game in the exact conditions that would male theminevitably lose, anon. Are you male?

>>213493582
I’m not saying it’s not retarded I’m just pointing out it wasn’t necessarily instant win. I’m giving the benefit of the doubt maybe the seeker gets caught up in the heat of the moment without doing the math in his head or is unaware of the current score due to being hyper focused on catching it and ends up fucking the team over. It’s plausible

>>213493582
>“What did he catch the Snitch for?” Ron bellowed, even as he jumped up and down, applauding with his hands over his head.
>“He ended it when Ireland were a hundred and sixty points ahead,
the idiot!”
>“He knew they were never going to catch up!” Harry shouted back over all the noise, also applauding loudly. “The Irish Chasers were too good. . . . He wanted to end it on his terms, that’s all. . . .”
Sometimes you just want to end the game on your own terms.

what kind of spells can a black wizard cast?

Have you ever watched Hockey? It's almost based around having one man down, which is a huge disadvantage. If you set your Seeker to constantly look for the Snitch, you're playing a man down.

The real problem is all these new Broomsticks which are OP and need to be banned, but the Quidditch Commission is a little conservative on making big changes.

>>213493318 (OP)
POP POP

>>213493579
The only way to end the game is by catching the snitch. If everyone is focusing on the snitch, one dude could just score +150 points worth of goals by himself.

>>213493525
That was a good game. If something deserves a remake it's games like this. Imagine full online pvp quidditch with modern enhanced mechanics

>>213493582
If your scoring boys are getting absolutely cockslapped then you might as well just catch it for some kind of bragging rights
But yeah its especially dumb considering its perfectly legal to physically assault your opponents during the game, so a seeker who doesn't want the Snitch caught can just sucker punch their opponent whenever they get close

>self-flying racing brooms become the new meta
Ban on factory default snitch seeking broom charms NOW.

>>213493645
you can tell rowling was seething about people criticising her retarded sport when she wrote this

>the virgin rich boy who buys himself the best top of the line equipment
>the chad rich dad who buys his entire team the best top of the line equipment
harry easily could have funded his team

Harry Potter doing something trivial that renders the rest of the plot irrelevant: a concise summation of the dullest franchise in the history of movie franchises. Seriously each episode following the boy wizard and his pals from Hogwarts Academy as they fight assorted villains has been indistinguishable from the others. Aside from the gloomy imagery, the series’ only consistency has been its lack of excitement and ineffective use of special effects, all to make magic unmagical, to make action seem inert.

Perhaps the die was cast when Rowling vetoed the idea of Spielberg directing the series; she made sure the series would never be mistaken for a work of art that meant anything to anybody?just ridiculously profitable cross-promotion for her books. The Harry Potter series might be anti-Christian (or not), but it’s certainly the anti-James Bond series in its refusal of wonder, beauty and excitement. No one wants to face that fact. Now, thankfully, they no longer have to.

>a-at least the books were good though
"No!"
The writing is dreadful; the book was terrible. As I read, I noticed that every time a character went for a walk, the author wrote instead that the character "stretched his legs."

I began marking on the back of an envelope every time that phrase was repeated. I stopped only after I had marked the envelope several dozen times. I was incredulous. Rowling's mind is so governed by cliches and dead metaphors that she has no other style of writing. Later I read a lavish, loving review of Harry Potter by the same Stephen King. He wrote something to the effect of, "If these kids are reading Harry Potter at 11 or 12, then when they get older they will go on to read Stephen King." And he was quite right. He was not being ironic. When you read "Harry Potter" you are, in fact, trained to read Stephen King.

>>213493889
>the virgin rich boy who buys himself the best top of the line equipment
Harry never bought his own equipment.
>Nimbus 2000
A gift from McGonagall
>Firebolt
A gift from Sirius Black

>>213493653
chickenus watermelonum

>a position on the team is entirely dedicated to chasing after a ball that has nothing to do with the actual game.

>>213493653
Avoidus alimonyo

>>213493318 (OP)
it isn't, there are multiple occasions where harry had to count the score not to catch the snitch too early
notably in the 4th book krum lost the game by catching the snitch because his team was losing on points but the other catcher was inches away from the snitch so krum was forced to catch it himself otherwise the score would be 10-320 instead of 160-170 (don't remember the exact numbers). this guy >>213493702 gets it
imagine being filtered by a sport made by a woman

>>213493653
Black wizards are canonically stronger than white wizards. They do not need to use wands because they are more in tune with magic and they are all able to easily become animagi.

>>213494045
They have bigger wands too

>>213493921
Rowling probably didn’t want the kids on set getting murdered.

That kid was also Magnitude.

>>213493994
McGonagall blowing the Gryffindor yearly budget on a single pro broom for Harry because she had a bug up her ass over losing a children's team sport too many times is peak foid writing

>And Harry Potter catches the snitch! The actual score is irrelevant! Gryffindor wins!

>>213493653
Accio

>>213493525
It's 150 retard

>>213493318 (OP)
For me, it's the beaters. Their entire job is to just try their best to murder the snitch catcher with bats and flying sentient cannon balls, I think it would be a really psychologically soothing job.

>>213493579
There was a deep lore book about quidditch that included the history of the sport. It claims the game was even more retarded at its inception with the early meta being exactly what youre suggesting, largely because the only person who got the prize money for the game was the player who caught the snitch

>AND THE PLAYER SCORES BEHIND AN ARBITRARILY DWARN LINE SCORING 50% MORE POINTS EVEN THOUGH GETTING PAST DEFENSE IS TECHNICALLY HARDER
>AND THE TEAM 1 WINS THE GAME WITH A TOTAL SCORE OF 111:110, ONLY THE LAST 5 MINUTES OF THE GAME ACTUALLY MATTERED
Name a dumber sport

>>213493653
>teacher of the darkie arts

>>213493653
Black magic

>>213494712
american football

>>213493318 (OP)
Sometimes a team can have such a massive point lead than they’ll still win even if the other team grabs it. There have been games that have lasted literal weeks because it cannot end till the Snitch is caught.
Honestly Quidditch being absolutely retarded is one of the better parts of HP desu. The absurdity of it is reminiscent of the bullshit wizards would do in Discworld novels.

>>213493653
fetus deletus

>>213494301
I don't think you read the books

>>213494778
>Quidditch being absolutely retarded is one of the better parts of HP
It was designes to be retarded because Rowling's then boyfriend loved to watch soccer and she was pissed at him. She tried to design it to be nonsensical in a way that sports fans would hate.

>>213494852
This is pure cope.
>lad just wants his pint and footie in the evening
>nagging cunt wants the lad and ends up hating footie
>"i'll invent a cool imaginary sport so the guy dicking me down might pay more attention to me!"
>turns out to be completely womanretarded
>"i-it's on purpose"
Do you pajeet fucks seriously believe everything people say?

Rowling's notes explain this. It's because it infuriates men.

>>213494915
see >>213494920

>>213493653
bixnoodius

>>213494712
blame the rules, not the players

>>213494943
>>213494920
>she said so therefore it's true
Can anyone fact check it? Is it fake news? What's the science on this? What do scientists suggest? Anyone checked Snopes yet? Is it peer-reviewed?

@213494991(noYou4u)
>author talks about why they wrote something
>BUT IS IT TRUE?!?!?!?!?!1!1!!!!!!!
Fuck off.

>>213494852
>>213494915
>>213494920
In the books the snitch doesn't guarantee victory, only gives you 150 points. There are plenty of interesting tactics you could develop around that idea in reality and it'd still be popular. You only need to look at sports like rugby union or gaelic football, where there are multiple ways to score points but where each has a slightly different value. Aesthetic or desirable play aren't the same as being good enough to win over a certain timeframe, so Rowling has inadvertently incorporated something less detached from the real world than she realises.

Obviously, writing something deliberately retarded doesn't negate the fact you've made your own book worse.

I still like her though, she's made £1bn+ off utter slop and seems to revel in flaunting it lol

grow up reddit tranniea

>>213495061
>only gives you 150 points
AND instantly ends the game. The game CAN'T end unless the snitch is caught.
>rugby union
Hate it
>gaelic football
I don't mind it, but I prefer Aussie rules or, at worst, International rules (a hybrid of Aussie and Gaelic designed for our two countries to compete against each other)

>>213493653
NIGGASFINNABESLAW

>>213493653
dindo nuffinous

did a match in the books ever end in a way other than the snitch being caught?

>>213495518
Nope. The closes thing is the 'lore' book saying that Hogwarts matches have time limits because super long matches aren't feasible for students.

Dehest dehs deh dehe dehy deh dehie dehs. Deh deh dehing deh deh dehard deh deh dehs deh Dehwarts Dehdemy deh dehey deh dehed dehs deh deh indehable deh deh dehs. Deh deh deh dehy dehery, deh dehs’ deh dehency deh deh dehs deh deh dehment deh indehive deh deh dehial dehs, deh deh deh dehic undehical, deh deh dehtion deh indeh.

Dehs deh deh deh deh deh Dehling dehed deh deh deh Dehlberg dehing deh dehs; deh deh deh deh dehs deh deher deh dehen deh deh deh deh deh deh deht dehthing deh dehbody?deh dehusly dehable deh-dehtion deh deh dehs. Deh Dehry Dehher dehs deh deh anti-Dehtian (deh deh), deh deh’s dehly deh anti-Dehes Dehnd dehs deh dehs deh deh deh, dehty deh dehment. Deh deh dehs deh deh deh deh. Deh, dehfully, deh deh deher deh deh.

>d-deh dehst deh dehs deh deh dehough d-deh
"Deh!"
Deh dehing deh dehful; deh deh deh dehble. Deh deh deh, Deh dehed deh dehry deh deh deher deh deh deh deh, deh dehor deh dehtead deh deh deher "dehed deh dehs."

Deh deh dehing deh deh deh deh deh deh dehry deh deh deh deh dehed. Deh dehed deh deh Deh deh dehed deh deh dehal deh dehs. Deh deh dehlous. Dehling's deh dehs deh dehed deh dehes deh deh dehs deh deh deh deh deh deh deh dehing. Deh Deh deh deh dehish, dehing deh deh Dehry Dehher deh deh deh Dehphen Dehng. Deh deh dehthing deh deh dehect deh, "Deh dehse dehs deh dehing Dehry Dehher deh dehdeh deh dehdeh, deh deh deh deh deher deh deh deh deh deh deh Dehphen Dehng." Deh deh deh deh dehght. Deh deh deh dehing dehic. Deh deh deh "Dehry Dehher" deh deh, deh deh, dehed deh deh Dehphen Dehng.

>>213495620
transcoded unironically

>>213495620
I love that someone actually took the time to make that image.

>>213495661
kek I see your point

>>213494274
See
>>213493695

>>213495518
The Quidditch World Cup in book 4 was won by the team that didn't catch the snitch.

>>213494991
i dare suggest that having it in writing, right from the horse's quill, may be enough.

>>213495829
not that lol
it was unironically made by a brown trek tranny to defend against >>213493921

>>213495871
It still ended when the snitch was caught.

>>213495061
it kind of works if there's a set time limit. the Snitch is just this weird, one-off bonus thing that happens SOMETIMES.

dunno if there are any poolfags on /tv/, but i recently got into watching games, apparently here in the UK we're switching to international pool rules, where every shot has to be super intentional, can't not hit your target ball, it's all about just doing the correct thing every time well, and it's incredibly tedious/boring

>>213493318 (OP)
They are ruining the franchise by adding niggers and jeets into it

>>213495061
Quidditch chapters/movie scenes wouldn’t have been nearly as entertaining without the retarded rules tbf. I find the bludger the funniest part. Like what justifiable reason could there be to have a shotput ball that’s been enchanted to try and kill people be necessary in your game?

>>213495957
you cant ruin zogslop propaganda isn't was never good in the first place, pablo

>>213496034
schizophrenia like this is especially funny because liberals now despise rowling and HP and want to kill her

>>213496034
redpill me on JK Rowling herself being a marketing ploy.

>>213496078
>uh they dont like her now, but still like her slop so none of her antiwhite agenda and pro satanism(lgbt) from years ago doesn't count now
kek
you brown "people" and crystal cafe roastoids are so funny, especially with her currently trying to blame conservatism for trannyism

>>213496164
Meds.

>>213493653
they can summon Buckbeak on command

>>213495620
for me it's Dehvid Copperfield

>>213494844
Did it get explained any further? I read them and that's how I remember it as well.

>>213493653
Resist arrest.

>>213493318 (OP)
remember a while back when people were trying to make quidditch a real sport on college campuses? Pure retardkino that was

>>213493525
3rding that its 150 cuz im sure non HPheads will never believe anyone now thanks to you

>>213493613
Plus it’s supposed to be extremely hard to do it at all. Harry gets it every time because he’s the chosen one or whatever but games could take days if had shit seekers. And then that one guy in the fourth book lost on purpose because he knew his team fucking sucked and was never gonna catch up.

>>213495620
lol

>>213495938
I'm an unabashed English patriot and spend hours of every day convincing the world that the good folk of England can do no wrong, in any conceivable way, in any field imaginable, and yet even I have to concede that the traditional English pool table is fucking retarded and the regular American-style set-up far superior. The misshapen white ball is the most obvious reason why.

>>213495161
Yes, it ends the game, but it depends on the seekers being fully aware of everything happening around them.

>>213493465
Rowling had to contrive this exact scenario 3 books later to make it seem like she wasn't retarded