what a retarded movie

>>213571047 (OP)
Any decent rip yet?

>>213572169
this

I had a choice between that and Naked Gun and I went with the latter because it was shorter.

Thank you for reading my blog.

>>213572203
Liked and subbed.

>>213571047 (OP)
I liked it a lot, the opening 2 minutes with the little girl narrating was excellent, fantastic Nightmare on Elm Street atmosphere.

>>213572169
>>213572186
stop being poor

>>213572203
Weapons is funnier than Naked Gun

>>213571047 (OP)
stop being a pleb

I need more “Town goes fucking crazy” kino like this and Halloween IV
>not watching the shitty new halloween movies ever

>>213572925
hot fuzz

>>213572831
who was the girl,? where was she talking from?

>>213573011
That’s pretty much the opposite

i liked Han Solo's girlfriend that he cheats on. She had huge tits

>>213573084
Not sure but I was impressed by her delivery. Scarlett Sher was her name, but I found no photos.

the little boy is fucked up for life, right? imagine your parents trying to murder you like that

>>213573133
not really. everyone in the town goes crazy. it's what you asked for. we're done here. have a nice day. :)

>>213573217
They were already crazy before the movie started tho

>>213573199
his parents too, they remained vegetables even after the spell was broken

>>213573199
>>213573279
I guess the witch drained too much of their life force by the time they were freed so there was no coming back. Yeah the kid is fucked, there's no snapping back from that experience. He will be living in a tent smoking crack in 8 years same as the tweeker.

>>213573011
world's end too kinda

the kid's dad looked so fucking familiar but i don't think i've seen anything else he's been in. did anyone else feel that way?

>>213573148
I'll take Julia Garner. She's so petite but still has such a big perfect ass, it's quite impressive.

https://thefappening.pro/emmy-winner-julia-garner-nude-and-sexy-60-photos-and-videos/

>>213573490
I thought he looked a lot the the WKUK nigga that died

Beautiful movie. See this in theaters if you can. I got a free second ticket because my theatres alarm went off but this is shit very nice. Worth ten bucks to see it on the trutru screen

>>213572169
Here's one.
*PRRRBBRRAAAAAAAAAAAAP*
Ahhh, that one was a wet one. Hope it smells as good to you as it feels good for me

>>213573518
Sorry to disappoint anon but i think almost every single photo in that collection is a young Juno Temple. only the one without nudity is Garner

>That part where the protagonists realized that the title doesn't refer to the witch but the automatic firearms they purchased at the nearby dunkin donuts
Powerful

>>213571047 (OP)
Tell me the whole twist bullshit I don’t want to waste my time with this shit. Why does Wong from dr strange look bloated? That shit looks so dumb.

>>213571047 (OP)
I’m wondering if it was actually her aunt.

>>213573648
him being bloated goes well with his character. he's about to split this with his husband in the movie before he headbutts him 30 times and smashes his skull entirely

>>213573628
It's definitely a move. Brave, stupid, something. To call out your own metaphor in the film in a dream sequence and then never mention it again. Zach said each character is a representation of different feelings he had after his friend (Trevor) died. It's definitely something new. People seem to hate it which means it's new and abrasive. Saying the allegory out loud in an character dream sequence. Well see how to play out in film history.

To be fair you need a high IQ to appreciate Zach Cregger films

>>213573724
the director literally said he had a dream with that gun image and that it doesn't mean anything but just really liked it. the movie spells out that the kids were "weaponized" somehow, hence the title

>>213573713
What’s the whole twist le epic holy shit thing everyone’s talking about? Is this just about mind control? Mind control is the lamest shit ever.

>>213573805
It is cool looking. In the script it was in flames which I thought would have been cooler. But don't think he just had a dream and threw something in his sophomore movie with no relation to the plot. Are you stupid?

>>213573797
Horror movies are the gayest shit ever.

>>213573818
A witch mind controls people with voodoo shit.
That's it, there's your big twist.

kids go missing
kids are literally in the first place you should look

>>213573818
there isn't any epic twist. i think what people are referring to is that there is somewhat a tonal shift near the end that some people love and some hate

the kids that were taken by the witch turn against her and chase her through a neighborhood, through houses, windows, etc. and rip her body completely apart. definitely intentionally funny at times

>>213573859
Mind control is lazy.

>>213573884
Such a satisfying ending, the bitch deserved to die screaming.

>>213573889
horror is an inherently lazy genre

>>213573724
>People seem to hate it which means it's new and abrasive
/tv/ hates fucking everything. the movie is getting nothing but praise outside of this shithole

>>213573889
mind control but in a way like Hocus Pocus where the witch is using the children to heal herself because she's dying. she drains their bodies and why all the kids are basically braindead at the end

>>213573621
Yeah I am disappointed, I was ready to start simping for her hard. Thank you for setting me straight, I'm trying not to goon-out so much anymore.

>>213573818
>epic holy shit thing everyone’s talking about?
It's not the twist, it's the ending.

>>213573410
No it’s just that Alex’s parents were under the spell longer so they take longer to come back, it took the kids a years

>>213573958
hey at least you have juno temple now. she used to be very hot and would get naked all the time

>>213573884
I understand the metaphor of the school shooting I even understand the metaphor of all of the children being in the basement of the only kid that's left I.E the shooter.
What I'm trying to figure out is what the witch symbolizes. Because all the children at the end chased on the witch and kill her with their bare hands.
Just a really beautifully written shot and made movie. Can't wait to see this actually acknowledged during Oscar time. It's going to be the first horror movie up for best film.

>>213572904
>stop being poor
poor? I just don't want to go outside or to a movie theater or have to sit with other people. I also don't want to rent out the entire theater for a movie I'm not that interested in. I will buy a ticket to naked gun though and then pirate every other movie in the theater out of spite now that you said this.

>>213573995
stop being scared of your fellow human beings

>>213573941
The real question is is he beating us over the head with it?? Did we need the assault rifle with the 217?? Probably not. A little passe. But I fear that based off of this threat, a lot of people would not have gotten the point without the dream sequence.

>>213573991
i think the school shooting metaphor is a bit of a stretch desu. anons just ran with that because of an image of a gun in the movie that the director literally said means nothing, he just liked the way it looked from a dream he had

>>213573991
the witch doesn’t fit into the metaphor reading because there is no metaphor and basically you are fucking stupid

>>213574042
I don't think you even watched the movie Anon. It is very clearly a metaphor for school shootings. Good luck Next time on "retards try to understand movies"

>>213573884
The tonal shift at the end wasn't that unusual for a horror. First and second act are usually where the spooky mystery and atmosphere is, then the third act is about laying all the cards on the table and wrapping things up.

>>213574056
Or you could be nice and say at a certain point the metaphor stops and the movie begins.

>The casting replacements
Holy shit. Made the movie better for it.

>>213574061
maybe i am retarded because i can't tell if you're trying to be ironic

>>213574056
You're really stupid because the witch symbolizes trauma. I don't think horror movies are for you man.

le message is school shooters are just mind control victims and the witch is

>>213574092
agreed. i love that the director gave a shout out to the tweaker kid as the only one that stuck with the movie as it was delayed so long. the original Julia Garner actress would have been alright but Garner crushed it

>>213573713
>Make the Asian guy into a fag
Horror is conservative by default

>>213574092
What were the replacements? I'm in love with Julia garner

The witch went from playing Keanu's sexy romantic interest, to now being able to be a horror movie monster with just her normal looks. Age is a bitch.

>missing kids are in the spooky house with the windows covered in newspapers and the silent kid with the stroke parents.
>no one notices for months
this movie was retarded.

>>213574136
>Between May and July 2023, Pedro Pascal, Renate Reinsve, Brian Tyree Henry, Austin Abrams, Tom Burke, and June Diane Raphael were cast in the film.However, as a result of production delays and the 2023 Hollywood labor disputes, Pascal, Reinsve, Henry, and Burke had to drop out of the film due to scheduling conflicts; Pascal, in particular, had to exit the film for running against his commitment with the Marvel Cinematic Universe (MCU) film The Fantastic Four: First Steps (2025).

In February 2024, Josh Brolin joined the cast to replace Pascal. In April, Julia Garner (replacing Reinsve) and Alden Ehrenreich (replacing Burke) joined the cast.In May, Benedict Wong (replacing Henry), Amy Madigan and Cary Christopher were announced to have joined the cast.

>>213573882
Yeah but the kids leave when the police do look

>>213574136
>Rooney Mara and Elizabeth Olsen were offered the lead role but both turned it down. Pedro Pascal and Renate Reinsve were then cast but ultimately had to drop out due to scheduling conflicts. Pascal dropped out to star in The Fantastic Four: First Steps (2025), which Julia Garner also starred in.

why did Pedro drop out if Garner literally could do both movies? he would have been an awful choice though

>>213573979
True, looking her up now she's objectively better, but you know how it goes, once you develop a thing for a specific actress it is hard to move on.

>>213574170
It was just one month.

>>213574170
Leave the investigation to the investigators!

>>213574195
Why are you hating on josh brolin and Julia garner lol they did a fantastic job. I have Pedro Pascal fatigue.

>>213574170
it's literally one month and the movie shows how she dodged the cops. the principal basically says that the family needs their privacy

>>213574245
did you quote the wrong person? they both were great. i do like the original actress that was lined up to play her but i wouldn't change a thing

the kid who played the methhead is pretty underrated too

>>213574210
It was four days. Please read the script.

>>213574136
Pedro Pascal was supposed to be in the Josh Brolin role. That would have been 6 movies in theaters concurrently with Pascal starring. Shit is getting insane.

>>213574170
the parents are focused on the hysterical witch narrative and the cops are focused on the “rational” runaway narrative

>>213574139
she looks pretty normal in real life and is like 75 or some shit. i always knew her from Uncle Buck

>>213574283
And brolin did a fantastic job. Just goes to show. If you're a gay man who's willing to suck some dick in Hollywood, you can get some fantastic roles.

>sex scene
>Missionary
>three seconds of caveman grunting under a blanket
Pussy! Show me raw, uncensored doggystyle!

>>213573713
>gay niggas can't shove enough hot dogs in their face
kek

>>213574305
Looked sort of off even when she was young, I would guess that was a man in drag.

>>213574247
>how she dodged the cops
>THE PERSON THAT HAS ABSOLUTELY NO IDENTIFICATION
>WEEKEND AT BERNIE'S TIER DAD
>SURE MA'AM YOU ARE FREE TO GO
dude this movie was beyond retarded.

>>213574340
atleast it wasn't girl on top with a bra still on, but yeah I'm with you show me real skin slapping

>>213574339
Yeah everyone did. The only person I wasn't impressed with was the Solo actor. He doesn't know how to play a cop at all, it's a very specific attitude he totally failed at capturing, he seemed more like a video store clerk.

>>213574042
>he just liked the way it looked from a dream he had
kek based retard gregger

>>213574283
we dont have a pedro problem we have a "hollywood doesn't have a leading man under the age of 50 anymore" problem. brad pitt and dicaprio are geriatrics and doing all the good stuff, who is under 50 that has any kind of leading man quality? I can't think of a single one

>>213574417
I liked his character because it felt more like a human being instead of Hitler incarnate, which is how most leftists write and play cops

>>213574455
Pattinson

>>213574455
jared leto

>>213574365
that was a lot of fucking hot dogs.

>>213574389
Could explain it away saying the witch put some hex on the cops to make them all dumber than usual.

>>213574389
what are they supposed to do about a man that walked in but seems retarded? start questioning why he's acting retarded? the witch was a real person and part of their family so i'm guessing she has a real ID to prove her relation

>>213574455
Pascal is also over 50, he's the same age as DiCaprio.

>>213574425
honestly you'd probably be surprised by the number of filmmakers that put shit in their movies "just cuz it looked good"

honestly i love it when some media person asks a director what the meaning is behind something and even gives their take on it just for them to be like "oh, it just looked fuckin cool" or that it was an accident

>>213574417
I think his writing just kind of sucked. Was the character supposed to be autistic or chad? I have no clue

>>213574485
Police training is specifically designed to make you less human. My sister married a cop and he's basically a robot at this point. Sad when I can remember how he used to be before he went through the PD brainwashing.

>>213574455
You're insane to think Pascal isn't a gay answer to cancel culture.

>>213574455
ryan gosling

>>213574042
>i think the school shooting metaphor is a bit of a stretch desu
That's just because the director was afraid to commit to it

>>213574510
hes 50 bro

>>213574546
>what are they supposed to do about a man that walked in but seems retarded? start questioning why he's acting retarded?
Investigate him? Gladys claimed he had a stroke and she came in to help the family. Oh really? When was the stroke? What hospital did he went to? Why didn't his wife show up to the police station with him? Oh, she had a stroke too? Fancy that.
Just absolutely retarded justifications that ultimately boil down to "If I don't make the characters act this way, there's no movie"

>>213573991
>what can the sunken eyed crooked nose interloper who manipulates adults into harming each other while feeding on their children represent
I have no idea

>>213575042
they didn't want to seem ableist

>>213575170
don't forget transcoded

>>213574178
>Brian Tyree Henry
Why is it mandatory to cast blacks as principals? I think surgeons and judges are the only professions with the same

>>213575170
Damn. I'm sorry it took me this long. The trans allegory is heavy.

>>213574455
Any faggot barista is fine for half his roles he doesn't do anything impressive

>>213575042
>What hospital did he went to
>Fancy that
SAAAAARS

For once I'm glad that a horror movie has a proper script, structure and more importantly that it is shot like a proper movie.

Lately almost every horror movie has this weird "tight" look and feel to it, like all the shots are tight or very "staged" like the entire approach is to stylize and make it minimalist and claustrophobic. It made the stories feel small and limited and imho it always felt like you're seeing a short story made into a feature length movie.

Weapons goes the other way. The shots are wide, the locations clearly established and defined, it looks properly framed and shot, like an actual movie and not some "intimate project". I got sick of that style since it made all horror movies have virtually the same look and feel to them. This is much different and it goes a long way.
Same thing with the script. It doesn't shy away from establishing the flow of the town a bit, which might seem superfluous and "boring" but it gives context and gives tension room to work its way through the entire setting. Conversely, lately horror movies feel like the entire world is reduced to 2-3 people and the rest simply don't exist, like everything is happening in a pocket universe. Not so here.

I'm just glad it got made and got made well.

>>213575170
>>213574042
I want to say that this movie is a trans allegory just in case that guy from WKUK transitions, you can go back and say, see it was a trans allegory all along.

>>213575261
he has enough presence for a lead just barely but like I said who else is there? brad pitt and dicaprio are busy with oscar bait they can't do every mid budget film someone else has to

>>213574692

I saw Gosling in that Fall Guy movie on amazon the other day and half his face is plastic now. It's really offputting and bizarre.

I liked how at the end when brolin was looking for his kid in the basement he turned around a black one to look at his face, apparently thinking the witch might have turned his son into a nigger

>>213575676
When magic becomes real anything is possible

>>213574596
What do you mean by this?

>>213575676
Took me right out of the movie

>>213575676
kek, wtf

>>213571047 (OP)
I just want to see a webm from a camrip of the chase scene
someone posted the dumb jumpscares in an earlier thread but I want to see what everyones talkin about

Horror movies are for retards. This one looks and sounds good at least

>>213576225
>Horror movies are for retards
it's definitely the most woman genre of film

>>213575676
That cracked me up. Considering who the creator is I assumed it was an intentional joke.

>>213576285
>>213576225
95% of horror movies are shit but the 5% that are good are the best movies youll ever see and a lot more exciting than your shitty western dramas o algo

>>213572169
No. You unwashed can cope with the shit camrips that have gambling site URLs playing pong across the screen and subtitles in Bionicle.

>>213575481
Dude ssshhhh this place isn't for people who actually like films lol

Film of the year. If it's not up for flick of the year the Oscars will never give anything to horror. Zach is the best.

>>213574017
scared? I find them deplorable and disgusting. I avoid them whenever possible. It's a shame because I'm quite charismatic. I just came back from a function where everyone involved or around me kept buying me drinks and asking me to tell them more.

The towns full of ring cameras and yet the cops are too stupid to notice the kids are all running to one place?

What did you expect from a horror movie? There is rarely any movies that would be considered actual smart horror.

>>213577560
Maybe not set it in current era? That way no cameras means people really have no clue where they went.

I enjoyed the movie, but not what I was expecting and slightly disappointed when this was the teaser poster.

>>213577512
>Dogs couldn't sniff out the location when they're literally in the same neighborhood

>>213573490
Literally another Trevor stand-in

>>213577652
They have a literal witch, so any discrepancy they can just say a witch did it.

>>213577602
2:17 literally meant absolutely nothing lmao.
Honestly what the fuck was the point of anyone in the story? The tweaker is basically the one who solved the entire case and the retards just happened to stumble upon it

The entire case could have also been solved if the drunk teacher called a CPS check the moment she saw that the house was boarded up with newspapers

>>213577683
2:17 references Matthews 2:17 about a mother grieving her children after a massacre, so it's tangentially related about its school shooting allegory, but yeah, it really meant nothing in the movie.

>>213577683

You're thinking about it the wrong way.

The situation was ALWAYS meant to be solved because the witch doesn't give a fuck. After she "fed" on the kids she'd just skip town. The kids would've been found at some point one way or another.
That's why she didn't really give a fuck if the kid feeds them properly or not, it was just a temp situation until she got a bit better, then she'd leave anyway. She clearly does not care about the mess she's making and who gets killed and how because the plans was to siphon the energy and move on.

>>213577725
Did that require kidnapping the children for a month? It sounded like she could have just have them run off at 2:17 AM every night then return home the next day as if nothing happened.

>>213577741
you can't just break and recast the spell over and over, it puts too much strain on the target and the witch themself

>>213577741
She could, but again, she doesn't care. She clearly thinks she can control the situation in totality and is not too bothered by the mess she's making.
She even left her own blood in the glass bowl at the principal's house and walked away not giving half a fuck.
She clearly meant to leave town after regaining her strength for a bit.

>your premise was just an X Files episode
I guess modern horror is so bad that this passes as a masterpiece nowadays.

>>213577833
name one horror movie this wouldn't be the case about

>>213577853
Jaws