CARL YOU MOTHERFUCKER PIECE OF SHIT GANGBANGING COCKSUCKER

TENPENNY YOU MOTHERFUCKIN PIECE OF SHIT
I AIN GONNA LET YOU GET AWAY WITH WHAT YOU DID

I SMOKE CAUSE IT GIVES ME PIECE OF MIND

RYDER NIGGA

KEEP UP MOTHERFUCKA

GroorG StreerS
HooH...

>>712836317 (OP)
Imagine if your name was Carl. You'd have a free personalized shout out from SLJ.

>>712837061
>tfw cousin died during the last streetstreet driveby
>your groovegroove homies want a payback
>can't even go with cuz you're too fat of a fuck for a driveby
>only thing you can handle is a drivethrough
>they won't say it but you can tell they're all thinking you're a busta
>feels bad
>fuck it, order some PizzossiP HuttnH and BEEB

>>712837061
SOVL
god i need to replay SA this year
i used to actually replay it every year and 100% it each time. i mean i was cheating a little bit because i was using a program to make horseshoes and oysters being collected with just two clicks, but everything else i'd do legit
the most fun was getting CJ super fat, and then gaining muscles and physical condition and then do all those marathons, bicycle challenges etc. etc.

>Replay San Andreas
>Get to THAT mission
You know the one

Got milk?

>>712840637
I don't

IMA FUCK YO CAR UP MADAFAGGA!

>>712840637
The RC Helicopter mission?

>>712840637
>that mission where you have to increase lung capacity
>RC helicopter mission
>mission where you have to steal combine harvester and run away from those fuckers with snipers who kill you with 2 shoots or destroy harvester as you run away
>driving school - that part where you have to do weird 180 from a ramp which is literally impossible unless you set fps to 30

>>712836317 (OP)
The RPG stat system was needless bloat which served no purpose other than novelty for the time the game came out.

>>712843373
it wouldn't have been so bad if you didn't get locked out of the storyline over it
at least V didn't make you grind for lung stat to beat a specific mission

>>712843373
ur a fag and should kill yourself
don't post ever again

>>712840665
I like how basically every female npc in the game has giant tits and jiggle physics.

>>712843148
>>712843513
You're already supposed to have high enough lung capacity from exploring the map at that point.

>>712843832
>you're supposed to play the game THIS WAY
nice "sandbox" bro

>>712843373
It's true and that's why this game is peak SOVL. Imagine thinking modern slop that do the bare minimum and only do a comittee aproved derivative shits as good.

>>712843832
unless you were busy collecting oysters, no, there's no specific reason your lung capacity should be high enough at this point of the game

>>712840637
freefall

Reminder: the game only has swimming in it because players kept bitching about it being missing from III and VC.

>>712844493
I'm really surprised that the scope-creep didn't totally fuck over development. Truly a better time for gaming.

>>712844673
Given how broken a huge chunk of the game is in various forms it really did.

>>712843373
>>712843513
>the gameplay was bloat
Just watch the cutscenes on YT if you don't want to play a video game.

>>712843832
maybe if there were some islands or other shit around the map then sure
but other than just getting out of your car after failed jump or messing around with boats a little you wouldn't spend that much time in water imo
when i was a teen and played GTA SA for the first time i actually spent tens of hours exploring the world but mostly countryside and San Fierro

>>712844885
feature bloat is bad
having to grind a stat with at most two use cases in the whole game to beat the story is bad
I don't complain about the game forcing you through the pilot school because flying is fun, diving and surfacing 1000 times is not

>>712843373
It was inoffensive
having ~100 shit missions is bloat

>>712845040
>to beat the story
again
>Just watch the cutscenes on YT if you don't want to play a video game.
You 'grind' because you want to raise the stats because it's a video game. You don't grind just so you can unlock your next epic cutscene and get closer to being able to tell people on Myspace that you beat a video game people think is cool.

>>712836317 (OP)
SUCH LANGUAGE

Uccidi Big Smoke.

>>712845197
grinding stats which serve zero purpose is bad
grinding gun skills for instance is fun because it has a large impact on gameplay since it improves your shooting and lets you dual wield some guns
hell even grinding those firefighter and ambulance missions is fun because the reward for them is pretty neat
lung capacity has zero purpose in-game (not even for oysters), if not for the game deciding to lock you out of the story for it nobody would bother raising it

>>712840637
The fucking mission where you are not supposed to destroy sweets car despite the retarded drivers all around?

>>712845525
I'm really not sure why you keep asking me to repeat myself. If you don't want to play the game and just want to complete the story and see all the cutscenes, watch it online.
If your argument wasn't
>I need to spend a total of ten minutes underwater throughout the entirety of playing an open world game
maybe it'd be easier to take you seriously. You're basically saying
>I just want to play through the story and be done with it
which again, at that point, why are you playing the game.

>>712836317 (OP)
What was his plan again?

>>712846356
To keep the ballas and grove street fighting so they kill each other while he reaps all the rewards.

>>712846180
you must really like Ubisoft slop which forces you to go on collectathons to advance through the main story because apparently locking game content behind grinding bullshit is good according to a retard like you
get it through your braindead skull: grinding the flight or pilot school is fun because driving and flying are core elements of the game, grinding a stat with zero use case outside of a specific mission is bad

>>712837061
'Least it was before the evil forces of Ganon fucked errythang up

SA is cool.

>>712836317 (OP)
>game about a black gang banger
>final boss is a police officer

>>712840637
The mission where you need to have enough swimming skill.

>>712846180
yea bro I'd totally rather be fucking swimming in a game where you can shoot guns drive cars and fly planes

>>712840637
I don't actively hate any of them. The flight school I don't care for because it's so boring.

Why are they called gangbangers

>>712840637
>the go meet catalina on the other side of the map mission
>the go back to angel pine mission
>the go pick up cesar and drive back mission
>the drive around san fierro mission
>the lung capacity mission
>the bait mission
>the Zero missions
>the flying school mission
>the toreno package mission
>the casino heist set up missions
>the take over the territories again mission
>the help the vagos mission

Wtf was his problem?

>>712848219
he's jewish

>>712840637
2/3 of the game is >that mission

>>712848219
he was never fit for a criminal life

>>712848041
I was so fed up with flying by the time of Toreno's last mission, that I left the Hydra and went on feet to destroy the other jets. Took forever but less frustrating than getting blown out of the sky, and starting all over again.

>>712848219
Speaking of which, what happened to Tommy?

>>712848856
He retired, goes by Timmy now.

>>712846662
Those games are bad in every way so it's a nonsensical comparison.
>grinding a stat with zero use case outside of a specific mission is bad
It requires you to spend around ten minutes total underwater so you're explicitly ignoring me saying
>I need to spend a total of ten minutes underwater throughout the entirety of playing an open world game
Because you know I'm right and you're a disingenuous faggot.
>>712847620
I'm sorry you subjectively do not like a single aspect of the game and are arbitrarily dismissing it in a way that could be said about any other single aspect of the game
>muh grind
again, it takes about ten minutes to do that, it's an extremely flimsy argument when you stop intentionally misrepresenting it as a 'grind'

>>712836317 (OP)
IMAGINE modern writers doing a character like this

>>712844493
Which isn't even realistic to put in because blacks can't swim

>>712848856
He becomes a mentor to Jason and Lucia in GTA VI

>>712847826
Either because guns go bang and they shoot other gangs, or because they like to buttfuck eachother, or both.

>>712836317 (OP)
if SA would have come out now he wouldve been white

>>712840637
I can't follow the damn train, Smoke, I TRIED

>>712836317 (OP)
Bring him back for VI.

i remind you that the time frame between SA and VC was 2 years, and between this and 4 was 4 years.
Now remind me, when did 5 come out? 10 or so years ago?

>>712836317 (OP)
ALL YOU HAD TO DO WAS FUCK THE BIATCH IN THE ASS, CJ
WHY DID YOU FUCK HER IN THE BUSSY?
YOU NOW GOT AIDS; CJ

>>712846878
>looks better than 99% of modern games despite having 1/100000 the polygons and texture fidelity

>>712854596
september 2013

>>712854960
>dude, anti-soul gas good cuz old
lmao never change /v/

>>712840637
For me, the entirety of San Fierro is THAT mission. I don’t even mind Red County or Bone County, there’s just something about San Fierro and it’s missions that I found so incredibly fucking bland

>>712846878
They really knocked it out of the park with that world. Not too big, not too small, just the perfect size

>>712854960
I feel like since video games couldn’t be too realistic back then, they put more attention in world design to give you the idea of being immersed in a place instead of just recreating it one to one

>>712850925
>wasting the player's time is good, actually
thankfully they put in cheats so it only took ~5 minutes on my end

>>712856812
>crying about not wanting to spend even ten minutes swimming around in a several dozen hour long open world game
I'm not sure what point you're trying to make, I identified immediately that this argument is from people who only watch games and don't actually play them. I'm sure your Angry Sanchez or Markiplier LP wasn't ruined from watching him swim for ten minutes throughout the entirety of their playthrough.

>>712836317 (OP)
Nigger

>>712853167
VI's villain is either a drug cartel or a corrupt government agency

Achievable natty?

>>712843148
>>RC helicopter mission
>throw bomb on the enemy rc helicopter
>win

>>712861539
I could never be black natty so no, not for me.

ok let's do this

>kill sleeping dude in one rifle shot
>can sprint around his house sounding like >>5900791
>ez modo
Then you just need to complete burglary for unlimited sprint which is pretty useful in SA.

I KNEW I WAS THE CHOSEN ONE

>>712843830

She killed gandrillions

>>712864772
move aside chestlet

I didn't know you could get different scenes if you were fat CJ

>>712865179
the tits of that NPC with the red bikini and ponytail on los Santos Beach are much bigger

>>712867251
For me it was the Vice City girls with the fish net tops.

>>712836547
I SMOKE CAUSE IT GIVES ME KNOWLEDGE*

>>712848041
>the go meet catalina on the other side of the map mission
Agreed. This shit was annoying especially since OG SA didn't have GPS. In the Definitive Edition it isn't as bad but in the GO I constantly had to check my map to make sure I wasn't going the wrong way.
>the go back to angel pine mission
???? Is that the one where Cesar brings Kendl to safety, that's just a cutscene?
>the go pick up cesar and drive back mission
This one is annoying as hell, especially since he just fucks you over by dropping you off and not even giving you a ride back into San Fierro.
>the drive around san fierro mission
Nah you're retarded. The drive around San Fierro mission was sovl, kino, all of the above.
>the lung capacity mission
Agreed.
>the bait mission
If you're talking about Ran Fa Li, that mission was easy and you're probably just a shitter.
>the Zero missions
Optional, crying shitter.
>the flying school mission
Easy, again you must be a shitter.
>the toreno package mission
Again, the only shitty part of this mission is the RNG of the helicopters possibly landing on you when you blow them up. Outside of that, this mission is easy as shit.
>the casino heist set up missions
Again, you're a shitter complaining about the easiest of missions.
>the take over the territories again mission
I only hate this shit because on my first playthrough I took over like 80% of the territories, just for us to be forced into San Fierro and then lose all the territory anyway.
>the help the vagos mission
I agreed with you here and there but at this point I've concluded you're just a fucking retarded shitter. This is one of the most fun missions in the game, fighting through the barrio.

>>712836547
THEM WHITEBOYS HAD ME ON CRYSTAL METH

>>712864772
>canonically saves the backdoor for her future husband
+Respect

>>712840637
Train one probably wouldn't fuck me now since I'm well aware of all the pitfalls to avoid. But none the less I will maintain the meme was well earned.

>>712836317 (OP)
test

>>712871848
Did you pass?

>>712867251
>the latina on the beach with the twin tails and massive tiddies

>>712836317 (OP)
Man this exact line popped into my head this morning and now I see this thread.
Uncanny feel

>>712846180
Retard

>>712844493
And it was worth it because of all the kino Beat the Cock challenges you could do across the three states.
>tfw lanklet CJ can blitz people on the straights faster than buff CJ can

>>712837061
WOW, SMOKE
TWO CARL JOHNSONS HOUSES
TWO CJ MAMAS TO FUCK AND SUCK

>>712840637
>mandatory train mission
>RC plane/helicopter with David Cross

>>712870168
I listed them by how tedious they are, not difficulty, you turboretard

>>712845525
With the big leap in computational power of the PS2 era, there was a lot of throwing shit at the wall to create new mechanics.

A few clunky stats in San Andreas hardly tanks the games enjoyment and there's way worse in new mechanics in other early 3D games. Stop whinging so much

las venturas got the most boring npcs

KIIIIIIIIIIIIIIILL
FRENZY

>>712836317 (OP)
>buffed CJ cheat
>weapon cheat
>rioting pedestrians cheat
its gaming time

>>712872910
>peds riot
>all peds have guns
>recruit anyone
>try to get a bunch of randos out of the city without getting murked by a wild RPG

>>712872454
Most of those aren't even tedious retard. You're just a shitter. Cope.

>>712840637
None that I can remember whenever I get a feel to replay SA

Probably because old GTA doesnt have fucking Nu-God Of War/RDR2 type of "gameplay" where you gotta wake up, take a shit, get dressed, get in your car, fill it with gas, then drive to the mission spot where you get 10 minutes of dialogue for the mission which is just to give someone their grubhub order at some parking lot. That of course is across the entire map so you can get nonstop exposition and "character building" dialogue while you drive there.

Oh and cant forget the cinematic and realistic movement and physics so when you are at the part of filling up your car at the gas station it takes 5 minutes after you press the button to get your character to penguin walk over and grab the pump. But its actually 10 minutes because youre unsure if the game actually registered your input cause nothing is immediately happening so you move around pressing the button again and again to make sure you are in the right exact spot, not knowing its actually because each time you move an inch it cancels the fucking action that takes 5 minutes to get started. Oh and for some reason for added immersion you gotta hold the right trigger while standing at the pump filling the car with gas so you cant just look away as the game spits and shits on what used to be your self respect of your time...


Yeah playing GTA 5 and RDR2 makes every classic GTA mission a blessing and engaging experience

>>712873338
>Failed : You left the toilet seat up

>>712844493
Its not fucking bitching if it's a real complaint. Dying cause I landed wrong after a stunt jump and rolled down a hill into the water is lame.

>>712871903
Yep, that's the one
i don't have the game installed, otherwise i would post screenshots, she's probably the bustiest NPC in the game

>>712873569
>RDR2 has a massive map for you to explore
>eventually vast swathes of the map will be locked off to you because a character has an established history of swimming like a rock
Seeing John nearly drown himself every time he brushes past a bucket of water is some comically sad shit to behold.