Thread 713669235

>try to sleep
>parents screaming at each other
>put in earplugs and hold a pillow over my head
>still hear them screaming
>get woken up by them screaming at each other
>anon why do you always stay in your room playing video games

>>713669356
isn't this the guy who gambles until he punches holes in his wall?

And then you wake up and realize you are 30 and live alone but the voices don’t stop.

>>713669526
he also accidentally killed his dog and replaced it with a new one thinking nobody would notice
that's why he refuses to show it on camera

>>713669235 (OP)
I want to pet Rei's hair

>>713669235 (OP)
Why don't your parents love each other

>>713669750
this but I wake up and I'm 30 still living with my screaming parents

>>713669750
This.

>>713670467
Gotta get up for a min…oh shit…oh shit…oh shit…hyper awareness of your total failure of a life….oh shit…oh shit….deep breath…it’ll be ok…it’ll all work out…gonna get a job soon…one day at a time…oh shit…deep breath…successful dissociation….starts up vidya again…

>>713670741
who cares about failing
nobody would remember your accomplishments when you die, so why waste your time being miserable

>>713670467
You're 30 and your parents still have the energy to scream at each other? Did they have you when they were 16 or something?

>>713670741
get out of my head

>>713670895
I care about failing more than anyone ever will for me. I'm so fucking tired of a bunch of retards in my life getting pissy whenever I even express the mere idea of an independent thought.
'BUT ANON, HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO TELL YOU THAT IF YOU (FOLLOW YOUR DREAMS) YOU'LL STARVE ON THE STREET LIKE A DOG AND THAT IF YOU FOLLOW (MY OWN DREAM THAT I FAILED TO ACHIEVE) EVERYTHING WILL BE SO PERFECT?'

I'm so fucking tired. Nearly 8 years of forcing myself to go through a college course I despise and can't stop failing at. Almost 10 years of working a menial job that pays minimum wage and has no room for higher payment or promotions. If I had access to firearms, I would've definitely already blown my brains out. But since I don't, I feel like my only choice is to spit on everyone's face and follow my own way, and it doesn't matter whether I fail or succeed. It'll be my mistake, my victory. Fuck everyone else, fuck their failures, fuck their victories. Delusional assholes, all of them

>>713672393
live to spite them

>my parents used to scream at me a lot but have mellowed out
>still traumatized and struggle to feel close to them because I don't know what to do with these feelings
Am in the wrong here

>>713670619
Sounds like a good time tomorrow.

>>713670467
This is it, now they're arguing about you though. Mom's in denial, Dad wants you on the street.

I have never heard my parents argue, ever.
They've been married for more than 30+ years.
I'm 32 and I still haven't heard them argue.

>>713674497
more like they're both dying because they had me in their 40s and screaming about money because my dad was too stupid to ever save a penny for retirement and my mom doesn't think she has to pay for anything because that's what men do

>>713670741
>have a moment of quiet to myself
>start daydreaming about getting into violent arguments with everyone I've ever interacted with in my life
please god make it stop

>>713671142
my mom got into a screaming argument with my dad when he was in the hospital with cancer and had her thrown out of his room

i love my mom but she is genuinely the dumbest and most gullible person i know
her iq has to be below 80

>>713674836
Cool, how dumb is she? Dumb enough to birth someone smarter then herself?

>parents scream at one another
>parents claws, punch and jump at one another with knives
>they don't give a flying fuck a seven year old child is watching
>step in one time to try and make them stop
>mother dearest punches me in the face with closed fist and goes back to fighting
Why are normal people like this, bros?

My mom and stepdad had a cold war going for years that I was oblivious too. It finally culminated in hearing my Mom scream at him to get his hands off her, I ran down the steps and she just burst into tears in my arms. I'd never seen her like that, never have since. It genuinely blindsided me. He slept on the couch for a year, then they sold the house and I left with her. Never saw him again, he moved to Thailand.

>>713674708
>Hmm...what to fall asleep to tonight...
>Winning the Talent Show? No, that was last night...
>Stopping an active shooter? No, no, I'd BE the active shooter...
>Yes, I think I'll build my fictional world some more (read: imagine the same five scenes you've been imagining for the last five years)

>>713674902
pretty much, yeah
I think it's because she smokes too much weed

>Was NEET
>Makes $160K last year
>On track to make ~160K already in June this year.
>Still feel like the same NEET with NEET tendencies

Strange. Nothing ever happens

>>713669235 (OP)
Rei says immigrants out of Japan

>>713675092
amazing.

>>713675103
What motivates you to make money? I used to do make the same amount of money but now I stopped working because nothing ever happens and I still feel the exact same.

>walk into lounge room
>mom is looking through the baby photo album while sobbing

>>713674904
Your parents generation was raised by the television, anon. Television is having personal jew right inside your living room.

>>713675013
What joy does G-d derive from making this happen

>>713675239
>SHUT THE FUCK UP MOM IM TRYING TO PLAY PERSONA

brother you're 18+ years old just move out

>>713675331
*starves to death*

>>713675363
get a job you fuckin' bum ass

>>713672393
>>713673561
>live to spite them

This is actually the correct advice, anons.

>>713675396
Sorry, I'm not going to do that.

>>713675013
>I think I'll build my fictional world some more (read: imagine the same five scenes you've been imagining for the last five years)
That used to be me, then I just gave up on it.

>>713675518
fair enough but i'd appreciate if you didn't bitch so much about your living conditions when you won't do anything to change them

>>713675238

Motivation is warm pussy. It's the only motivator that works at the moment. Although I am slightly black pilled after childhood gf betrays despite everything going just right and our life was stable and bullet proof. Whatever, the garden of Eden was not good enough for Eve. Even better men than me like Elon, Trump, Bezos, etc are divorced. I'll treat them like it's my turn in time.

>>713670619
How the fuck did they know?

>>713675894
>I am slightly black pilled after childhood gf betrays despite everything going just right and our life was stable and bullet proof.
alright you cannot just mention that and not give a qrd, what happened. Chad?

>>713676017

It got boring for her.

>>713675894
>your motivation is sex
>then goes into how bad he was fucked over from it
there is no motivation, is there

>>713676040
Kind of anti-climatic but I'll take it.

>>713675103
>>713675238
what job do you have that is netting you $160k a year wtf

>>713675103
tell a fellow neet what to do, brother spirit. im tired of this box.

>>713669235 (OP)
It could be worse OP. It could be way fucking worse.
>Super Bowl night
>Dad is hype as hell because his team is demolishing the other apparently
>Mom is a bit tipsy and super giggly
>Dad slaps her butt when he thinks nobody would notice (I did)
>She laughs and sits on his lap, I leave and go to my room
>Have to put on headphones at max volume to drown out weird kissing noises that night
I couldn’t even play vidya on the TV that night because they were hogging it :(

>>713676273
>>713676275

Semiconductor job + Nvidia stocks. Lowest entry level is basically operating a literal dish washer in a bunny suit, no college required. Good luck.

>>713676441
haha yeah imagine two parents who actually love each other and have a good time, that's how bad I had it anon.
you don't know how bad it could be.

>>713676273
reseller + art commissions
stopped doing those though because i'm a depressed lazy retard and now i make no money

>>713676441
fk you i hope you die in a ditch

>>713676441
Hearing my neighbors have loud sex at like 2 AM when im gaming and decide to go outside for whatever reason is always funny to me.

>>713669235 (OP)
>heres some embarrassing shit about me
>please dont use it against me

>want to love a woman
>want to feel loved
>too lazy and tired
>not ugly but just neet and never leave my room
>too depressed to enter a relationship, will not be able to maintain it yet want to but cant
>want to make money
>cant be bother to finish college, no ambition
>cant make money, no ambition to follow a routine
>I don't hate others but I envy them
>yet that envy doesn't drive me to do anything
>no motivation beyond a day, quit my old 2 jobs after a few months of work, just couldn't hack a normal routine
>cut off all normalfag friends, ghosted everyone, cannot maintain basic friendships without disappearing for 5-6 months.
>try dating apps for a day once a year then just uninstall after seeing the environment
>just plays vidya and watches anime all day
>doesnt get neetbux, lives off parents, has very little desire for money, doesnt really know what to use money on
>literally cant drive, never bothered trying
I don't understand, what am I supposed to do. Should I just get a CC, blow it all on hookers and drugs, buy a gun and shoot myself? I see no answer, there is no solution.

>>713678038
you could try reading The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck

>>713678038
just get a job or go to school and be miserable there too. it's what i did.

>>713678038
You pretty much just wrote down the thoughts in my head. (I'm 24 years old)
Just know you are not even close to the only one living like this, and the people that do blow up their success and like showing off more so it looks like more people are living normal lives, when in reality they're not.

>>713676441
my dad just told me a few days ago how much he loves sex and how upset he is he hasn't had any for 20+ years and how my mom cheated on him with multiple men

>underage sharty thread
/v/bros..

>>713678038
>>713678316

My only recommendation is to leave your environment. I left home on a bicycle with $200 dollars. I found a gf, broke up, bank account $200K. Happiness follows sorrows, as long you live there will be a tomorrow.

>>713678225
>>713678268
>>713678316
>>713678921
I appreciate it

>>713674615
Consider yourself fortunate.

>>713678921
the problem is I don't live somewhere or under the circumstances where I can just get on a bike and "run away"

Stop worrying nobody is checking if you succeded 24/7 but you. Take some time to get your head in order. Also ignore the youtube videos telling you how to live the algorithm is controlled by fucking google corpos.

>Enjoy being alone more than anything else.
>Love meditating in quiet environments.
>Renting out with mostly quiet people except one fucking retard who's awake from 12am to 6 laughing loudly directly into the vent that opens above my bed.
>Tell him 5 times to be quiet while everyone's sleeping and he replies with a serious and somber "sorry..." only to do it again that very night.
>Can't afford an apartment on my own.
>Work demands I be social as much as possible.
>Develop tinnitus for absolutely no reason.
If suicide was legal and the government provided a painless escape I would take it in an instant.
I feel like I've spent most of my life trying to find small happiness and distractions because all of my problems are literally not treatable.

>>713679434
that really doesn't sound that bad
dont take your living situation for granted, things can always be much worse

>>713679857
I haven't even told you half the shit wrong with my body, only the things stopping me from achieving a modicum of happiness.

>>713679434
just move out man, why live with a retard neet who is up all night if you are sensitive to sound

What the fuck is going on in this thread, parents can screan at each other like once or twice a year but this is another level of craziness

>>713681205
retard

>>713675615
>fair enough but i'd appreciate if you didn't bitch so much about your living conditions when you won't do anything to change them

>>713669235 (OP)
well you're 25, maybe it's time to move out zoomer faggot

>>713683301
25 is a child

>>713681205
go back to sucking dicks on reddit

>>713683203
no cap but try and get a bit physically active and regain your health through sleep and you can slowly work your way out of that scribbly quagmire

>>713675567
still doing it, I even started writing some things down to not forget my canon, meanwhile I have set up several millenia worth of history in two different universes just from imagining shit while trying to fall asleep.

>>713683361
sure if he is living with his parents and not taking care of his shit himself.

>>713669235 (OP)
>im in no means a chad but multiple women have wanted to hook up with me
>want affection
>but every time they message me I ignore them I literally have no fucking idea why I just ghost them and just never speak to them ever again

>>713669235 (OP)
>family is arguing loud enough that you can heart it anywhere in the house again

>>713670337
maybe he should be killed w/ hammers

>>713678038
Have you tried going fishing? It won't change anything but it's fun.

>>713670619
Fuck, I'm gonna do this today. just not pizza hut fuck that disgusting shit, I'm going homemade

how do parents scream at each other for 10 hours a week, for decades, and never break up?

>>713685114
because they both jointly own a house and there's too much legal niggery to bother with for low IQ boomers
so they just destroy their entire family and traumatize their children instead

>>713685425
>and traumatize their children instead

>>713685529
believe it or not growing up in a household full of screaming and violence fucks you up
but what do you except from people who had their son's dick mutilated at birth

>>713685114
Gotta stay strong for the kids, man. It's important for them to grow up being around both their parents and hearing them scream and insult each other all day.

>parents yell at each other all the time
>graduate high school with mediocre GPA
>apply and get into an expensive college but don't put any effort into financial aid and parents make too much for it anyway (even though they gamble it away)
>never go to college because no money
>spend half a decade as a NEET getting shot down by every minimum wage employer in the town except shitholes with insane turnover
>all the while the house goes to shit because parents stop caring and it gets infested with vermin
>eventually decide fuck that and apply to a cheap state school
>get part-time campus job (it's a lot easier to get one than as a neet) and graduate with honors
>make nearly six figures a year out of graduation, own apartment with no roommates
>still hang out/play games with my old friends from my NEET days
>parents split up and moved across the country but both seem happier now

My life isn't perfect, but it's a lot better than it was. I'm not special, I think most of you guys can do it as well. I do miss completely no-lifing games with NEET bros, though.

>>713669235 (OP)
Anon you gotta move out of your parent's house, that's eating up your soul. I'd shop around for a shit job and see who's looking for roommates.

It's nice to live with your parents if they're chill but if they're not, get out of there, man. Literally zero point in being a NEET if you're just emotionally exhausted and miserable.

>>713678038
the answer is to organize and make a change
you've lost cause you(we all) are atomized and isolated

>Mom finds you sitting out in the freezing garage past midnight because it was the only place in the house you couldn't hear them yelling at each other
>Still feel bad sometimes thinking how she must have felt seeing me out there and realizing why

>>713669526
no thats bossmanjack

>try to sleep
>heart beat is racing
>stomachache
>sweating randomly
>diarrhea
>can't stop thinking about the 10kg I lost just lying in bed
>can't believe he didn't even warn me about the antidepressant discontinuation syndrome
>this could last up to a year

Hey, at least minish cap is really fun.

>>713672393
>8 years in college
>10 years working

Your outburst is a bit immature for somebody at least in their late 20s, I do hope you get what you want, but do it for you, don't do it to spite them. Stop even considering them, it's keeping you trapped in this gay, immature zone

I'm 41. Most of you facing these problems are a lot younger than I am and need to know that things really get better as you get older. I've been through my fair share of shit and literally 95% of it doesn't matter at all anymore. There is hope anons. Keep fighting, you can do it.

I was doing just fine before puberty hit and made my end-all be-all of existence is procreation.

I feel bad for you anons, it sucks to be living/growing up through that shit.
It gets better as you get older though, things can mellow out.
Mogudan Rei.

>>713669235 (OP)
Just turn them to Tang, Rei.

>>713687572
Rei should fill herself with tang until she blows.