Thread 714701780

This image says it all. Overall soft body. Slim frame. Big, flabby ass. Fat thighs.

Don't fucking trick people into believing this bitch is physically strong. She's not, and she never was.

>>714701780 (OP)
Durrrr that's why she has a suit and alien powers.

>>714702076
She doesn't have "alien powers". She has DNA that made her withstand the atmosphere of certain planets.

>>714701780 (OP)
to be fair, super metroid samus is more athletic looking

I have gone from $75k to $175k salaried since I first saw this posted

I never said that

>>714702173
She has consumed too much bird dna juice if you know what I mean.

>>714702309
What is this? 2004?

>>714702287
Is she really?

>>714702309
take me back...

>>714702380
>bird DNA
This meme needs to burn to death

>>714701780 (OP)
She will never match the strength of giant crustacean aliens so she would be relentlessly raped to death regardless of how fit she is.

>>714702173
Oh so you are saying that she is innately powerful in some way.

>>714702514
That's why she guns?

>>714702505
Wouldn't bird DNA make her bones thinner?

>>714702395
I don’t have it on hand, but she looks stronger and more confident in the cross section of the suit

>>714702531
No, this was about physical strength. Not fans' imaginary headcanon based on Chozo DNA which doesn't do jack shit for her physical strength.

>>714701780 (OP)
Isn't she canonically like 7 feet? I think I remember seeing that somewhere and it sounds true enough.

>>714702663
I'm specifically asking if that is a power in itself you cockmongrel.

>>714702738
She's not. Look at the fucking image in OP. That's from the actual game. Does that look like she's got bragging rights for physical strength to you?

>>714702505
YJK

>>714701780 (OP)
kill yourself sybb

>>714701780 (OP)
>Overall soft body. Slim frame. Big, flabby ass. Fat thighs.

>>714702663
The bird alien DNA makes her faster, stronger, smarter and will also allow to her live longer than a normal human.

>>714702839
Strength is comprised of 2 distinct things. 1) muscles, the actual contractile tissue size and amount of fibers and 2) a neural component

Mayhaps she has a beefier neural system capable of producing incredible force and/or a decreased ratio of inhibition to excitation as seen in the mentally impaired, ie. what is known as "retard strength"

>>714703171
She looks nothing like Samus. What's your point?

>>714702839
Actually yes. There's a reason men find women with thick thighs attractive.

>>714701780 (OP)
>Sybb making the same thread after he got BTFO the last time he made the thread
Samus has Mawkin Warrior DNA in her, cope, Sybb

>>714703181
Bullshit. There's exactly zero official information in what you just said.
>>714703370
You say "thick", but her thighs really are just fat.

>>714703475
She is small and doesn't lift. She is probably fast like a hawk but her punches would be weak.

>>714701780 (OP)
Samus lost her virginity to a bird. Losing Adam's brother broke her. Losing the baby metroid also broke her. The chozo gene editing, the metroid vaccine, phazon mutation and X absorption did a number on her.

It would be safer to dip into a vat of acid than to try to start a romantic relationship with Samus Aran.

>>714703508
In the official canon manga she gets Chozo gene therapy.

>>714703261
Stop talking shit you know nothing about, and look at the fucking image. Her body is all soft, and fat in places.

>>714701780 (OP)
Samus is a La Luz Extinguido level alien mutt, exceptional strength should be plausible

>>714703537
She's been shown to lift heavy objects and even toss them. Again Sybb, Master Chief never fights aliens outside of his Mjolnir Suit, does that make him weak despite his augmentations?

>>714703508
Just say you hate attractive women.

>>714703624
Which has nothing to do with what you said.

Her BioArmor is unique to her and her Metroid DNA can give her retard strength so it doesn't really matter how weak she is physically

>>714703651
You literally just ignored the point that muscle size isn't the sole determining factor of strength.
You are a retard.

>>714703750
Big flabby ass and fat thighs which rub together are not attractive, unless you're a mutt.

>>714703673
I think Spartans are genetically modified to be taller and stronger than normal humans. Like faggy Adeptus Astarters.

>>714703774
In the games she is shown having similar abilities as those of Chozo Warriors who are stronger than normal humans.

>>714703903
I never said anything about muscle size. If you know anything about anatomy, you can tell Samus's ass is large and flabby. Note what I said. Large AND flabby. It's not flabby because it's large.

Start paying attention to details and stop being a brain dead, American mutt.

>>714703948
So, like Samus

>randomly scrolling
>find Sybb's autistic Youtube channel
This sperg really gets around huh?
https://youtube.com/channel/UCnFeo3qRUpdI5xdBmPTEMfA

>>714704030
No, she's not. You're thinking about the powers of her various power suits.

Not a single game (except Smash Bros., which isn't canon because every character is a figurine and not the actual character) has shown Samus with great, physical strength.

>boot zero mission
>Zss
>Hit jump Button
>She jumps twice her height
>On Zebes btw
BUT HER ASS IS FAT

>>714704075
Sorry you're just too retarded to understand a distinct and separate point.
I'm not arguing she's skinnyfat or whatever you want to call her, but you don't understand what produces strength.

You claim she is not physically strong because she doesn't APPEAR to be physically strong but there are determinants of strength that DO NOT show themselves physically, which is what I explained to you.

Stop being a fucking faggot. We all know real life women are not as strong as men.

>>714704283
Mario jumps higher than that, but he's overall fat. You have to look at the body, and not the actions BECAUSE IT'S A VIDEOGAME.

>>714704283
Jet boots as shown in smash.

>>714704408
You can immediately tell if a body is fit or not. You're just making shit up to sound fancy.

>>714704468
>>714704496
>Svhizo instant loop cope

>>714702663
>based on Chozo DNA which doesn't do jack shit for her physical strength.
Samus can jump roughly 3x her height while in the zero suit, and Zebes canonically has 1.26x stronger gravity than Earth. This is a superhuman feat showcasing her immense leg strength, so don't tell me the chozo DNA did nothing. Samus could kick cave in your chest cavity with her ostrich legs

>>714704468
Real life Samus would be screaming for her goddamn life once per month because her period got turned into egg laying and her size would yield FAT fucking eggs that would stretch her beyond belief

How badly do you stutter in front women OP?

>>714704725
I already went through this you retarded piece of shit. Mario can jump super high too, despite having a fat body. It's a videogame.

You have to look at what the body actually looks like.

>>714704172
>https://www.youtube.com/@TheVideogameAssChannel/videos
What is this autism?

>>714701780 (OP)
That's because Samus has a gymnast body. which makes sense since she has to curl into a ball from time to time.

>>714704615
So you're just retarded and don't understand physiology at all. That's ok.

Doubt

>>714704808
what?

>>714701780 (OP)
Her ass is unironically HUGE. Fuck, look at that thing

>>714701780 (OP)
>Samus is not physically strong
That's right, which is why her power armor is a walking artillery platform that facilitates high fire power rather than complex martial arts, like for instance the Master Chief's suit will allow.

>>714701780 (OP)
>Soft body. Slim frame. Big, flabby ass. Fat thighs.

This is all just proof that Samus should have been a boy.

>>714704852
>You have to look at what the body actually looks like.
You're arguing that Samus isn't strong because she doesn't look strong, but she clearly IS strong and showcases that strength all the time. The fact that she's had her genes spliced with Alien DNA should be enough for you to suspend your disbelief for why she doesn't look like a bodybuilder to do the things she does.
>it's a videogame
exactly, so stop being retarded and accept that Samus is a superhuman killing machine inside and outside her suit.

>>714705103
Chozo gene therapy changed her biology. Samus has to take hormone blocking pills or she starts laying eggs once per cycle. Its part of why shes so quiet. If It were real life she would be living a nightmare because no amount of tampons would stop her from dropping what shes doing to pop an egg. Judging by chozo and human sizes the eggs would be large, so at bare minimum Samus would Go through forced birth pains monthly.

>>714704852
You have to look at what the body actually looks like.
Squid kids from Splatoon have no bones, they're 100% pure muscle and could flatten your penis with a sneeze.

According to Dread though Raven Beak's SUPERIOR Mawkin genes actually made her super powerful way stronger than the pathetic Thoha genes weaker than humans that they infused her. Hell it's probably due to Raven Beak that Samus is so hot for human standards, the masterrace Mawkin genetics made her a prime specimen to procreate.

>>714705983
If the mawkin are so chad, why did they job to the X? And why arent the X sporting that mawkin bulk?

I don't even need to enter this thread to know it's the brownest, incelliest, schizo thread around

>>714705521
You're just making things up. She looks all soft and she can't kill anyone in her zero suit.
>>714705731
Squid kids aren't human. Please stop being retarded.

Samus without her armor would kick OP's ass

>>714701780 (OP)
Yeah I would rape this bitch in real life. Come on man. Maybe that suit makes her stronger or some shit, idk

>>714703948
Spartans have reinforced bones, too, kinda like Wolverine with his adamantium skeleton. There have actually been comics where Wolverine is a lot more agile and animalistic without his skeleton weighing him down, but he's arguably not as threatening because he's got a lot less weight behind his blows. Super strength isn't part of his skillset, he can just push himself to 120% all the time thanks to healing factor and the heavy bones give him leverage when pushing, pulling, or lifting stuff.

>>714706314
Indeed.
https://arch.b4k.dev/v/search/image/Hv75q8BI6GoRAxI1Q2TaGQ/
>>714706461
Ffs Sybb, get a life.
>>714706467
A malnourished Chinese gutter oil collector could kick OP's ass.

>>714702394
What happened that he wasn't flooding the board for a few months? Rangeban?

>>714701780 (OP)
It's 2025, you can just say you're a faggy faggot faggot manfucking faggot faggot faggot who is attracted exclusively to men because you're a faggot.

Faggot.

>>714703915
Just say you're a virgin then.

>>714704172
>>714704915
>"Watch on your computer monitor in 4k and full screen" plastered onto the title of random videos
>This channel is pure.
OP is a special breed of autistic. He's like Barneyfag if he invested every possible website for video game content or discussion for over 25 years.

>>714706972
Unlike you, I have standards.

>>714701780 (OP)
Bird magic.
And feather pubes.

Someone should make a wiki with detailed information of all 4chan schizos

>>714707243
As much as they are annoying here, I truly pity their family.

>>714701780 (OP)
Feminism was a mistake

>>714706461
>You're just making things up.
It's official.

>>714707573
That's not official, that's from an old Nintendo Power where editors could do anything they wanted.

>>714707573
Here, let me make it more clear for the retards in the back.

>>714701780 (OP)
She’s meant to be 450lbs and shitting out metroid babies every month.

>>714707075
>incel
>unrelaistic and high standards
colour me shocked

>>714707652
Nintendo Power was officially licensed, therefore it had the Nintendo seal of approval for everything written in it. It's canon, just like Midna x Link.

>>714707892
God i wish i could shrink in size and explore Midna's flesh cave all day long

>>714707892
It was licensed, but back in those days NCL didn't have any editorial control. NP wrote a lot of shit that wasn't canon.

>>714708157
What is canon is what i personally think and everyone else has to deal with it

>>714708157
>NP wrote a lot of shit that wasn't canon.
It's comic book rules. Everything in NP is canon until Nintendo goes out of their way to say it's not.

>>714701780 (OP)
She was facing space pirates which normally can't even be hurt by your regular beams, those are not enemies she would be able to punch her way through

>>714701780 (OP)
duh that's why her boyfriend, metroid, is a robot

Samus sits on (You)'r weak human lap.
How do you solve this conundrum?

>>714708894
Cum instantly

>>714708229
Also my autism knows no bounds so suck my dick retards.

>>714701780 (OP)
Looks fine to me. You must just like to suck cock.

kinda skinny

>>714713103
>didn’t disfigure her body like the intro said
I get that you have to do fan service, but damn if that wasn’t a missed opportunity for more body horror

>>714713510
Maybe if we knock her around a bit?

>>714702173
She has like five sources of alien DNA in her by this point.

>>714713510
Hey kid, it ain't that kind of videogame.

>>714713651
>handheld rumblepack
What could possible go wrong?

In Other M, she has her height in the suit, her height in the Zero Suit (with heels), and her real, normal height.