Thread 714940485 - /v/ [Archived: 457 hours ago]

Anonymous
7/9/2025, 6:29:40 AM No.714940485
Malak_Jawless
Malak_Jawless
md5: 81c551cdda9e50e1dfe98dfe5679ffdd🔍
How does he eat?
Replies: >>714941038 >>714962245 >>714963076 >>714966753 >>714969935 >>714970391
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 6:36:05 AM No.714940812
Very carefully.
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 6:40:58 AM No.714941034
Onions up and down the ol nostrils
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 6:41:04 AM No.714941038
>>714940485 (OP)
What does he eat?
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 7:17:25 AM No.714942998
Why do all Sith turn into mutilated freaks? Do they even get laid or are they permaincels?
Replies: >>714943339 >>714943467 >>714943635 >>714950313 >>714954491 >>714957308 >>714959441 >>714962301 >>714962848 >>714977540 >>714977932 >>714983791
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 7:24:10 AM No.714943339
>>714942998
they are retards but rape has to be sith tradition
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 7:26:49 AM No.714943467
>>714942998
Sith are the ones that have sex, lorelet.
Replies: >>714962540
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 7:29:45 AM No.714943635
>>714942998
Because it's an objective morality setting. Being evil gives you a skin condition, being good makes you a wise force ghost. Midwits like kreia going "erm maybe the objective force of morality is bad because like, I'm being oppressed by the forces of goodness!"
Replies: >>714944617 >>714944802 >>714954413 >>714983791
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 7:46:06 AM No.714944471
Can't you be a chaotic good Jedi or something?
Replies: >>714944698 >>714945801 >>714957948
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 7:48:51 AM No.714944617
>>714943635
Objective force morality is bad because the force isn't inherently good only, it contains extremes of both good and evil which continually seizes control of people and entire civilizations, bringing them into conflict to impose balance. The more force sensitive a person is, the less their fate is in their own hands.

It's a cosmic force that removes agency from people and causes incredible suffering on a galactic scale, but in its defense, we can't know how much worse things would be without it, since the force is responsible for both destroying worlds (Nihilus) and renewing them (Telos restoration). It's an eldritch thing, and Kreia was a fool for assuming she'd achieved the highest understanding of it.
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 7:50:09 AM No.714944698
>>714944471
to be a Jedi is basically just to be a lawful/good force user. There's the grey Jedis, but they're called "Jedis" mostly because its Jedi that become politically neutral. Quigon and Jolee are both Grays
Replies: >>714944818 >>714946835 >>714951209
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 7:51:52 AM No.714944802
>>714943635
She doesn't say that btw.
Kreia is also a literal Sith lord so obviously evil.
Replies: >>714946372
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 7:52:03 AM No.714944818
>>714944698
Kyle Katarn, too in the literal sense since he has no issues using dark side powers. I think Luke as well to an extent because Yoda didn't pass on much of the old Jedi dogma, so his order is a lot more lax in its rules.
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 8:11:00 AM No.714945801
>>714944471
I think so, that's kinda what Qui Gon was
Replies: >>714946835
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 8:22:23 AM No.714946372
>>714944802
Her true alignment is dead center, she's the biggest centrist cuck in the galaxy.
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 8:31:28 AM No.714946835
>>714944698
>>714945801
So I can be an asshole and rile up everyone just not antagonize enough people for the Jedi police to come at me? Geniunely asking.
Replies: >>714947886
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 8:49:33 AM No.714947692
Is it weird that I feel pretty let down by the way Star Wars portray objective morality, but... really, really like Bionicle, despite that setting also having pretty objective morality?
Do you guys think there's a difference between how the two are handled, or am I just unfairly biased somehow?
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 8:53:28 AM No.714947886
file
file
md5: ae2ff2ecaaf7ea442a7bd83734fea5a9🔍
>>714946835
No one will like you, but sure you do you
Replies: >>714969424
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 8:59:58 AM No.714948201
same way how Vader eats, just shoving Milk into his abdomen with an IV needle
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 9:43:59 AM No.714950313
>>714942998
At least they get cool masks/helmets
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 9:52:25 AM No.714950695
Sluuuuuuuuuuuurrrrrrrrrppp
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 10:02:55 AM No.714951209
>>714944698
Jolee is not grey. He left the jedi because he thought he was more moral than the jedi because they forgave him for messing up. He was even more dogmatic than they were. He was like the Thomas Moore of Jedi, only they didn’t kill him for being obnoxious.
Replies: >>714954257
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 11:04:10 AM No.714954257
1751864953369865
1751864953369865
md5: 9178b5690fa71f6daa49487bfe98b359🔍
>>714951209
Yes he is. He sits center with a slight light side leaning, that makes him a grey. He spends half the game complaining about certain aspects of Jedi dogma, making him less dogmatic in certain areas than the order Jedi.
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 11:07:04 AM No.714954413
1700620363757572
1700620363757572
md5: 059814415411d06a81e7b1e7274043cc🔍
>>714943635
>Midwits like kreia going "erm maybe the objective force of morality is bad because like, I'm being oppressed by the forces of goodness!"
If the Force is good, why does evil exist?
Were all those dead kids and billions of Alderaani REALLY necessary for Anakin to throw Sheev down a ventilation shaft?
Replies: >>714955872
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 11:08:42 AM No.714954491
>>714942998
Cause they don't want to die and do everything to sustain their life.
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 11:28:47 AM No.714955512
The Force is, basically, a lake, which is inhabited, breathed and used by all living creatures. Some of them learn how to create and redirect new streams intentionally (as well as being able to see already existing ones and their influence on everything). Jedi try to maintain the lake clean and harmonious - sometimes actively by calming "bad" streams and those, who create such streams, as raised sand and twisted streams basically make everyone to see worse, to breath sand instead of water and to be harmed even physically by most hard streams. Sith are those, who create and twist such streams without consideration of the above problems - they are strong enough, they can breath sand somewhat because of their toughness, they use streams to hunt and eat others, to harm others, but it takes toll on everyone including sith themselves, ecause lake becomes murky, polluted, especially where siths swim and act.
Replies: >>714955780
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 11:34:04 AM No.714955780
>>714955512
We know the force has a will, it's not unusual to think that the dark side of it retains its own will and influences its users.
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 11:36:22 AM No.714955872
>>714954413
The force doesn't make things happen according to a plan, it just makes you ugly if you're a bad dude. That's the extent of its actions.
Replies: >>714956117 >>714959082 >>714983791
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 11:41:16 AM No.714956117
>>714955872
Obi-Wan stated that it guides people's actions, but that it also obeys their commands. It can influence people, just not in any way that implies consciousness.
Replies: >>714958261
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 12:07:26 PM No.714957308
1596047357406
1596047357406
md5: bf5b2956754664ff86465f87f1a75b51🔍
>>714942998
Not all of them. Most do though that's true.
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 12:20:20 PM No.714957948
>>714944471
Depends on what the Temple's "policy" is at the time; sometimes you'd get away with leaving the order but by the time of Anakin they were hunting down and murdering any "apostates" or "heretics"
Replies: >>714958297 >>714958471
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 12:26:09 PM No.714958261
>>714956117
Is basically just amounts to the fact that it tells the Sith not to put on any Clearasil
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 12:26:42 PM No.714958297
>>714957948
>by the time of Anakin they were hunting down and murdering any "apostates" or "heretics"
Patently false, Count Dookie successfully left the order on account of being too pacifist for even the order.
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 12:29:43 PM No.714958471
>>714957948
That's why Obi-Wan only says "you'll be expelled from the Jedi Order" for the crime of having a wife and romantic feelings.
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 12:43:11 PM No.714959082
>>714955872
>The force doesn't make things happen according to a plan
Anakin Skywalker was claimed to be the "Chosen One", who had a destiny to "destroy the Sith and bring balance to the Force".

The entire concept doesn't work if the Force is an entity without agency and forethought. Especially not when the prophecy concerns the Force itself and people who use the Force directly.
>the Force has told us there will be a Force user who will kill these other Force users and do a good thing for the Force itself
>but obviously the Force isn't controlling or manipulating anything to make sure this happens
Replies: >>714959228
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 12:45:51 PM No.714959228
>>714959082
>The entire concept doesn't work if the Force is an entity without agency and forethought
And it doesn't, so maybe that should clue you in that you shouldn't take a Jedi legend about how the Jedi view the Force and Balance as 100% objective truth
Replies: >>714959504
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 12:50:29 PM No.714959441
>>714942998
They usually end up fighting hordes of sexless force-wielding faggots swinging lightsabers around like glow sticks, you're bound to get fucked up at some point.
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 12:51:34 PM No.714959504
>>714959228
Except the guy who added the idea to the canon in the first place says that the prophecy was fulfilled in full. Anakin Skywalker brings balance to the Force by killing the Sith (himself and Palpatine).

The Jedi were completely right to believe in the Chosen One prophecy, they were just wrong about how it would happen.
Replies: >>714959812 >>714962178 >>714978557
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 12:58:11 PM No.714959812
>>714959504
>axshually the Jedi were right all along because uhh uhhh uhhh [Sith killed each other]
WHOA! Who could've seen that happen. This is totally a one in a million event that doesn't happen any day and totally has to be tied specifically to fulfilling the prophecy in what's not the most totally cope-out way possible. The Jedi can be glad knowing that they're right, and like, you know, all dead--BUT because of totally not being-wrong reasons...r-right.
Replies: >>714960593 >>714961964 >>714978557
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 1:13:42 PM No.714960593
now THIS is podracing
now THIS is podracing
md5: 136dfea12d6e26f4cd48cb96a7652941🔍
>>714959812
Just because you don't like it doesn't make it any less true. I personally think the chosen one prophecy bullshit is retarded and cheapens the OT, but if Lucas wants it to be canon, it's canon
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 1:40:05 PM No.714961964
>>714959812
The Prophecy said the total elimination of the Sith. By removing Master and Apprentice together the Rule of Two lineage of a thousand years is ended completely.

But do sperg out a little harder over being wrong.
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 1:44:15 PM No.714962178
>>714959504
I've always thought that the full extent of what it meant to bring balance to the force was to kill off both the Jedi and the Sith, which is exactly what he did. Luke doesn't even really count because he was never a full Jedi, Yoda left a lot of the dogma out of his training.
>here's how to use the force
>trust your gut to do what's right
Replies: >>714962521
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 1:45:35 PM No.714962245
>>714940485 (OP)
He eats smells.
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 1:46:25 PM No.714962301
>>714942998
Darth Mauls apprentice turned into a real cutie.
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 1:50:39 PM No.714962521
>>714962178
Yoda didn't exactly have a lot of time. He needed Luke to qualify as a Knight as soon as possible so he could fight Vader and Palpatine while there was still a chance the Rebellion could overthrow the Empire with those two out of the way. If he'd taken a year or two longer to indulge in the Jedi orthodoxy then the second Death Start would've been finished and probably taken the Rebels with it.
Replies: >>714962653
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 1:51:04 PM No.714962540
>>714943467
Wrong. Any Sith with power inevitably comes to the conclusion that anyone not based around getting more is a waste of time.
Jedi get laid more often, especially ones not living in the era where they obsess over the wording of their codes rather than the spirit.
Replies: >>714962882
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 1:52:55 PM No.714962653
>>714962521
Good thing too, because Yoda in his prime was going around terrorising young children against the dark side by telling them the slightest glimmer of humanity would slippery slope them into becoming space hitler. I truly believe Yoda himself was half the problem with the old order.
Replies: >>714963051
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 1:56:13 PM No.714962848
>>714942998
Because the Dark Side is heroin, and the internet is full of examples on what that entails.
>But evil should be hot!
Why? Why should evil be hot? Evil is huge floppy tits and a fat wet pussy, but you have to get through cold skin and bed sores to enjoy them. It’s the imitation of beauty, raw selfish lust.
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 1:56:54 PM No.714962882
Darthvec
Darthvec
md5: fd8c2e0a8f8f158ca7cd4927579a62a8🔍
>>714962540
>businessman with a code of ethics, even if he is a ruthless dickbag, sitting on top of a well of Dark Side energy
>becomes a Sith pretty much entirely because he can
>doesn't become completely obsessed with power for the sake of power because he's already lived by his own philosophy for years before becoming a Sith
>dies in bed surrounded by friends and family
>doubly impressive because he was a Rule of Two Sith Lord so he outlived his own apprentice's ambitions
Replies: >>714962957 >>714963301 >>714964508 >>714984238
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 1:58:28 PM No.714962957
>>714962882
What a chad
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 2:00:31 PM No.714963051
dhzvrma1nl841
dhzvrma1nl841
md5: 92bec0f2d2274ed60db615f7d210663d🔍
>>714962653
Replies: >>714963267
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 2:00:55 PM No.714963076
>>714940485 (OP)
He eats nothing but off brand tube yogurts
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 2:04:34 PM No.714963267
>>714963051
It's interesting that Dooku says this, acknowledges how bad the republic and the order has become, and that's enough of a crack in his psyche for Sheev to exploit. He did the same thing to Anakin. He hardly needed to put much effort into turning a Jedi when Yoda had already done all the work in repressing their humanity and leaving them vulnerable. Fuck.
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 2:05:03 PM No.714963301
>>714962882
For me? It’s Palpatine shitting in Plagueis for his stupidity.
>you got drunk off your ass in front of your fully trained apprentice. What the fuck did you expect was going to happen?
Replies: >>714963393
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 2:06:47 PM No.714963393
>>714963301
Didn't it turn out that Plagueis wasn't even completely evil despite being a Sith? I think he even considered Palpatine a friend.
Replies: >>714963616
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 2:11:21 PM No.714963616
>>714963393
He was incredibly evil, but his problem was he envisioned the end of the rule of two by ruling as equals, despite training Palpatine in all the Sith traditions.
Ironically his downfall came from doing too good a job with the teachings he was planning to abandon, since he saw Palpatine as a worthy equal, while Palpatine saw him as the only obstacle in front of complete control.
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 2:26:15 PM No.714964508
>>714962882
Why is the rule of two even a thing anyway? Wouldn't it be better if they trained more people at once?
Replies: >>714965051 >>714965742
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 2:36:27 PM No.714965051
>>714964508
Around a thousand years before ANH there was a Sith Lord called Darth Bane. He took a good long look at the Sith, their Code and why for the last 3000 years or so the Sith kept failing to destroy the Jedi and rule the galaxy. He came to the conclusion that the Sith's greatest enemy wasn't the Jedi but themselves; their own petty, shortsighted lust for power weakened them as a whole and this is what led to the Jedi always being victorious in the long run.

So he came up with the Rule of Two. The idea being that with some self control the Sith could keep their ideals going in a galaxy ruled by the Jedi while also luring them into eventually believing the Sith no longer posed a threat, at which point a properly worthy Dark Lord could exploit the Jedi's failings into a final and decisive victory by striking from the shadows.

It's basically a cope for their constant fuck ups by declaring "we only lose to you do gooders because we're TOO awesome!"
Replies: >>714969787
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 2:50:05 PM No.714965742
>>714964508
It’s because a for a Sith Lord to rule over more than one person, they have to be orders of magnitude more powerful so that they can’t gang up and backstab them. This leads to the problem that the Lord in question has to either deliberately keep their apprentices weak, which makes the next generation vulnerable, or raise a single apprentice who might use their elevated station to gather up their bottom feeders and backstab them, which also leaves them weaker.
In either case, they’ll eventually get their shit stomped by the Jedi who only get stronger when they’ve got an adversary to focus on. Even if another exceptional sith rises up, it’s only a matter of time before one of them is too weak to control the rest.

The rule of two weaponises self interest, since an apprentice won’t backstab their only ticket to power until they’re absolutely certain they’re stronger, and the master won’t get tempted to have a pointless war with the Jedi once they have enough manpower.
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 3:07:18 PM No.714966753
>>714940485 (OP)
Bastila chews and spits directly in his esophagus tube, like a bird
Replies: >>714968681
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 3:41:34 PM No.714968681
>>714966753
>bird
Tiger. Tiger, tiger.
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 3:52:49 PM No.714969424
>>714947886
This guy are sick
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 3:58:05 PM No.714969787
>>714965051
Was he a big guy?
Replies: >>714971016
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 4:00:18 PM No.714969935
>>714940485 (OP)
I'd imagine he'd be able to hook up some kind of feeding tube to his throat thingy and eats a nutrient paste.
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 4:07:34 PM No.714970391
9mx4z8bxpjk51
9mx4z8bxpjk51
md5: 997ac5d50049398c71cb72d42973dbae🔍
>>714940485 (OP)
>good guy Alek
>pretty cool dude
>simps for space elf
>takes literal torture in her place
>torture causes him to go bald
>she rejects him
>becomes one of the reasons he went dark
>loses chadly jawline in the process


Malak had it rough.
Replies: >>714971203 >>714971412 >>714975834 >>714977652
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 4:18:19 PM No.714971016
>>714969787
Yes. He also wore a mask for the majority of his time as a Lord
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 4:21:08 PM No.714971203
>>714970391
Why is he so bald?
Replies: >>714971451 >>714972921
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 4:25:08 PM No.714971412
>>714970391
>love could have saved him
Greek tragedy
Replies: >>714984385
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 4:25:45 PM No.714971451
>>714971203
Mandalorian Mengele did Auschwitz experiments on him.
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 4:49:16 PM No.714972921
>>714971203
At least he wasn’t Gammoreanlike
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 5:28:22 PM No.714975834
>>714970391
AHAHAHHAHA BALD FAGGOT
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 5:52:26 PM No.714977540
>>714942998
they're all mentally ill
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 5:54:10 PM No.714977652
>>714970391
Baldbros, our response?
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 5:55:07 PM No.714977709
“I told yall watch the teef”
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 5:58:30 PM No.714977932
>>714942998
Malak at the very least had sex with Bastila
Replies: >>714978516
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 6:05:54 PM No.714978516
>>714977932
Multiple times
Replies: >>714983423
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 6:06:20 PM No.714978557
>>714959504
>>714959812
>killing the Sith
>An almost extinct sect
>to bring balance to the Force
Uh... I always found it ironic that they believed it was the (almost extinct) Sith that needed to be destroyed instead of the Jedi.

It's MP with auto balancing teams
Replies: >>714978897
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 6:10:47 PM No.714978897
>>714978557
>How could the Jews POSSIBLY be as disruptive as you say?
>We're only .01% of the population!
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 6:21:29 PM No.714979719
How come they say Palpatine is the most powerful sith when he never consumed whole planets or used the Sun as a deadly laser?
Replies: >>714979837 >>714980569 >>714983160
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 6:23:00 PM No.714979837
>>714979719
Why do they even act like he's the strongest of his time when OP shit like Mother Talzin exists?
Replies: >>714980569
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 6:31:53 PM No.714980569
>>714979719
Palpatine’s power was primarily being a master ruseman. The main reason he died was because he couldn’t accept he’d fucked up his prediction and got tunnel vision as a result.
>>714979837
Talzin’s power was whatever the plot required of her. Formidable to be sure, but fickle when the plot needs her to forget she can turn intangible.
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 7:04:45 PM No.714983160
>>714979719
Because all of the EU got retconned.
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 7:07:50 PM No.714983423
>>714978516
and she still lost to Revan's cock in the end
Malak's lightsaber is either really short or he did not have feats to wield it effectively
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 7:12:03 PM No.714983791
count dookie
count dookie
md5: b78cda444e35da9d3ed4f1e353c26214🔍
>>714942998
>>714943635
>>714955872
Not all of them end up ugly. It's just highly likely that a lifestyle revolving around being a gigantic asshole is going to get you mutilated (either by other sith, or the jedi, or by someone else you've decided to fight). Classic FAFO.
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 7:17:56 PM No.714984238
>>714962882
>businessman with a code of ethics,
Less plausible than Force existing
Anonymous
7/9/2025, 7:20:14 PM No.714984385
>>714971412
>His love caused his fall
Greek tragedy