>>715511873
Oh my god, you absolute buffoon. You’re really out here using the Illumination movie as canon? That’s your airtight lore source? What’s next—are we deciding Mario’s power scaling based on the Super Show? Maybe Sonic kisses humans now because “the movie said so.” Jesus.
The Mario movie is a non-canon, Hollywood cash-grab with lore that was written between Minions storyboarding sessions. It’s full of fanservice and headcanon fluff to sell merch and slap kids with nostalgia. It’s not even consistent with the games, let alone meant to replace 40 years of Nintendo-established continuity. You’re citing it like it’s the Zelda timeline.
Nintendo themselves—actual Nintendo, not Chris Pratt’s fever dream—has confirmed MULTIPLE TIMES that modern DK is the son of Donkey Kong Jr., and Cranky Kong is the original DK. Go read a manual, open a player's guide, or literally Google “Cranky Kong Donkey Kong Jr.” and stop wasting everyone’s time with bottom-barrel takes scraped from Reddit threads written by people who think Diddy is DK’s brother.
Next time you try to step into a lore discussion, bring receipts. Not box office scripts.
