First DK Bananza review leaked
From this magazine:
https://www.metacritic.com/publication/power-unlimited/?sort-options=score
96/100
>higher than Odyssey (95)
>their highest score since Baldur's Gate 3
>their 10th-12th highest scored game overall
Looks like we're in for kino
>>715524009 (OP)Cool. Now find some reviewers that aren't paid by Nintendo.
It's unfair how this gets a 96/100 when ubislop open world collectathons with the same exact formula and higher production quality get a 7/10
cant find it, so either its already removed or op is a huge bunch of bananas
>>715524153This has a barefoot loli.
Do Ubislops have a barefoot loli? I don't think so.
>reviewing tendie games
a 96 on a tendie game is like a 65 for real games
REDDIT 33 is finisher. Try harder next time French fags.
-10 points Nintendo bonus
-10 points Switch 2 bonus
New score: 76
>>715524009 (OP)Haven't they done like two separate showcases for this game? Didn't reviewers already play the game and give their opinions? This game is bejng shilled so hard and nobody really gives a fuck, because people only liked DK for the challenge.
>>715524327>because people only liked DK for the challengeand music and monkeys
>>715524307It all evens out when you have the "no DEI" penalty in mind
>>715524327>This game is bejng shilled so hard and nobody really gives a fuck,The direct for the game got 5 million views. It's popular and wanted anon. It's a Nintendo EPD game. One of the most famous studios in the world.
>>715524009 (OP)They gave GAYTA 5 a 10? lol. This is why I don't care what woke faggot media thinks about anything. That game is complete garbage
How the fuck does a review leak
>>715524307reminder that "nintendo bonus" is a cope meme ported from the original "sony bonus" one
>>715524009 (OP)Yes, yes tendie the ps2 platformer that has been done 10 times before is better than massive rpgs with tons of player choice, interactivity, and actual story, gameplay and challenge, the reviewers were definitely not suffering from Nintendo nostalgia bias, gotcha
>>715524327It feels very forced doesn't it? The game wasn't a blip on anyone's radar until people started spamming loli Pauline. Tendies are being very vocal about it because it's one of two exclusives.
If this was 3D Mario I might understand, but it's leftovers from Switch 1 about a side character
>>715524009 (OP)i wont be playing because the devs are clearly sick in the head. why would you choose a barefoot underaged girl wearing heavy eyeliner/mascarra as a lead character?
>>715524252truer words have not been spoken
>>715524327DKC? The overt focus on difficulty was the worst part. DKC2 shines when its chill platforming and not try hard shit or gimmick shit
>>715524615It was the final game at the Switch 2 reveal anon. It was also revealed to be their Mario team. When people figured that out is when it got hyped. Why are you like this?
>>715524615>the game wasn't a blip on anyone's radarwhy are you like that?
>>715524009 (OP)Nintendo pays really well and journos fear tendies
>>715524813what a weird nonsensical post
>>715524440It's also been #1 on the eShop all week so people are buying it evidently.
>>715524813actually nintendo are NOTORIOUS for not giving journalists anything more than the bare minimum, why else do you think they milked any nothing burger FUD regarding the switch 2 launch while almost ignoring the 13000+ people losing their jobs at microsoft for their new nonhuman AI and jeet workforce?
It's going to be the highest rated game of 2025. If that triggers you then go ahead and seeth. I told people this 2 months ago when I figured out it was Nintendo EPD. Only a Zelda game, Rockstar or some new industry plant game like BG3 could score higher.
>>715524252Uhh yeah, kinda
>>715524252Was loli Athena barefoot?
>>715524813yeah, like when they didn't give any journo a switch2 and mario kart copie to review on launch, and are now using their own app to reveal game features to avoid journalist leakes.
>>715524153>with the same exact formula and higher production qualitySneaking lies into your statement like a stinking croc.
>>715524153lmao yazuke nigger shill is seething
>>715524985>then go ahead and seethkek, ESL tendies are in shambles over how little people care about this shit. gachaslop might actually be more interesting at this point
>>715524945>their new nonhuman AI and jeet workforceYou could just say nonhuman.
How does nintendo generate so much seethe?
>>715526008Mostly the vast amounts of undeserved praise from brand cattle and paid journos, no different than Apple really
>>715524440This. The fucking direct got more views then sonys last entire state of play lmao. People love the KONG
nintendo gamea getting consistently overrated will only ensure every single IP will be turned into open world slop
>>715526076>paid journosok dude
>>715526008Because generally if you want to play Nintendo games you also need a Nintendo console. The she comes from butthurt who want to play Nintendo games but can't justify buying a new console just for a few games
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>>715525073>>715525942>to progress the story she needs to be hagifiedNever expect anything good from ubisoft.
>>715526254This game isn't and won't be classified as open world.
>>715526008mogs all of their indieslop and AAAslop
>>715526254Anon fucking Super Mario 64 is more of an open world than this game.
>>715526325Then wait for the inevitable emulator what's the problem
>>715526325Then wait for the inevitable emulator what's the problem
>>715524009 (OP)You forgot to subtract the Nintendo bump. It's actually only a 86.
>>715524615You do realize the second trailer was basically the direct. They announced the game in a trailer that only focused on one aspect and then the presentation showed you everything else. The reason it blew up was because people actually understood what the game was after the direct
>>715524009 (OP)remove the nintendo bonus and its actually 85
>>715526008Unironically it is because they donโt seem to die. Nintendoomed has been a thing for as long as I can remember and it never happens. Even now they are the only company still putting out exclusive in a way that has only made them more money despite the journos and reddit saying that isnโt feasible in 202X
>>715524009 (OP)Tendie bonus means it's an 84 at best.
80-ish sounds about right for a near launch spin-off
>>715527207>First leaked review is a 96>Nooo it's still gonna get an 80!!Pathetic
Mr. E hates Mini-Pauline.
>>715527520when all the reviews are out it will be closer to 80
>>715524009 (OP)The game that should have been the launch title, can't wait.
>>715524545You were born after 2010. Shut the fuck up newgen
>>715524153Ah yes, I love how Asasins Creed lets you destroy the whole environment while transformed in multiple beasts
>>715524153>I don't play video games, look at me shit myself and yelling nonsense insteadAI really left a mark in the under developped brains of the third world teenagers
>>715524009 (OP)>He is in the game Might get a Switch just for that.
>>715528659it's happening
I still don't see a reason to play this over Odyssey.
>>715528754you can break the terrain
>>715528754Better combat, better co-op, and destructible environment
>>715528754Well, Odyssey was released 8 years ago for starters. This game has a different feeling to it despite sharing elements, from the basic structure to the UI. Voxel tech makes for a unique platformer, its a DK 3D collectathon after all these years, it has a carving mini game, its kino
>>715528754Loli Pauline is in it
So according to Male feathers, the game asks for a lot of money to move forward, so I guess speedruns will have to focus on efficient money hoarding. Elephant seems to be the best Bananza for that since you can suck money like a vacuum
>>715529242sounds grindy and boring
>>715524440>it has 5 million views!!>it's made by Nintendo EPD!!!The fact that you can't use the game itself to defend your opinion and instead have to rely on hype just shows how shallow and forced this game is. To think that you mongloids are all about gameplay first and nothing else matters.
>>715529746How do you talk about the game itself when it isn't out?
>>715529746Everyone who's played it at events loves it. Early leaked review just gave it a 97/100. Everyone who currently can walk into a Walmart or a Target and play a demo unit says it's addictive/fun. Cope dude.
>>715524009 (OP)>bing bing wahoo gets a 10/10 from "critics"Listen. I can appreciate good gameplay. But a game that only rides on its gameplay and doesn't have any strong emotionally compelling memorable components, which I don't see that being the case in a game for toddlers, isn't a 10/10 in my book.
>>715530108A sony movie appreciator made this post
>>715530028>Everyone who's played it at events loves it. They said the same about Concord
>Early leaked review just gave it a 97/100.You can't keep your facts straight for one sentence, it's a 96, and it's a score journos gave to TLOU as well
Seems like you're blinded by your cultish brand loyalty
>>715530186A literal toddler made this post
>>715528754what a weird, nonsensical post
>>715530367>A literal toddler made this postGlad to know you are a toddler, now get out
>>715530108Gameplay is king. Give me something I can come back to and pick up at anytime over UE5 cutscene shit made. E33 is a slog to replay after 1 playthrough because of mid-bad pacing.
>>715524153>ubisoft>higher production qualitylol. lmao even.
>>715530108Donkey Kong Bananza will have strong emotionally compelling memorable moments.
>>715530315You can walk into a walmart and target and play it right now retard. Or does your 3rd world shit hole country not have one?
Now imagine if instead of Nintendo, random indie dev #4682 makes this same exact game with a different name and puts it on steam. What would be /v/'s reaction? Would it even get a single thread? Would it even get 5+ digit player numbers?
>>715530486"Gameplay is king" is literal zoomer cope when the top ~20 best games of all time also have a crazy good narrative
>>715530108>a game that only rides on its gameplay and doesn't have any strong emotionally compelling memorable components, which I don't see that being the case in a game for toddlers, isn't a 10/10 in my book.This guy hates Tetris.
>>715530554Walmart is literally only available in third world shitholes though
>>715530620How many hours of Tetris did you play today
>>715530572No they don't. All the highest rated games are Zelda, Mario, Metroid and GTA. Rockstar gets most of their praise for their open world.
>>715530770I didn't say "highest rated" lil zoom zoom, I said best, nice self-report
how long is the game bros
if its short ill wait
>>715530564They wouldn't be able to make something with such quality so this would never happen
>>715530895>he fell for the seal of quality memeLMAO
>>715530186>>715530486>>715530620>bing bing wahoo fans having a melty over someone not giving bing bing wahoo a 10/10Again, I'm not saying that a game that doesn't really move you in any way besides having engaging gameplay is bad. Hell, it can even be great. But in my book it's not a 10/10. Also, Tetris indeed isn't a 10/10 game. But it's still pretty fun.
>>715530823What's your source of best?
>>715530954The observable objective truth
>>715524009 (OP)i dont understand how anyone is this hyped for this game. it looks so fucking boring.
it looks like one of those n64 platformers with better graphics and destructible environments
>>715530934Concession accepted.
>>715531119There's a leak thread up, go read it
>>715531095>Nintendo's has Nintendo's logo on it that makes it tha best
>>715530564>indie dev making a voxel game that isnt made of cubesNever happening
>>715531042You're rejecting the truth that people love and think that DK is amazing. So you're already showing bias and hypocrisy by saying you prioritize objective truth. You only trust your own made up truths.
>>715524009 (OP)Nintendo games are the worst when it come to journos overrating their games.
I still can believe that Odyssey have a fucking 97 on meta.
Can't wait for yet another 7/10 being considered a masterpiece
>>715530717>If it's a 10/10 game you play it every day.???
I played some Tetris Effect last Sunday, though.
>>715531053>it looks like one of those soulfull n64 platformers but with better graphics, better gameplay, and destructible environments
>>715531195You're rejecting the truth that flies love and think that eating shit is amazing. So you're already showing bias and hypocrisy by saying you prioritize objective truth. You only trust your own made up truths.
>>715524153Maybe because this is funny.
>>715531119Male Male feathers are solidifying is a chink wagie, and also the main leaker for this game, go read his entries on that chinese board
>>715530108>nooooo where's the allegory for depression?!! Where's the struggle against redneck fascists trying to prevent you from having gay sex?? Where's the evil corporation trying to suppress the islamo-communist resistance? Fuck this I am selling my Switch 2 and going back to PS5 !
>>715524009 (OP)>latest nintendo open world slop getting high praiseYea and? This means nothing. It's going to be short, empty, and each level will be packed with bananas in such a lazy way that the game will get very boring and redundant. Remember, Nintendo fans have no standards.
>>715531190>tendies never heard of ValheimThe stereotypes about them only playing tendo games are being reinforced every day
>>715531269You're mentally a child I see
>>715525073No sole = no soul
>>715524153It's because NINTENDO! When they do it's awesome!
>>715531381You're the one that failed to understand the difference between objective and subjective
Dr. E!
Mini-Pauline will win!
>>715531196>>715531269>>715531358The coping already begins. I hate how you can call something months out and /v/irgin's still act accordingly to how you say they would.
>>715528576Oh you mean these two mechanics that'll serve no purpose at all and are included just cause?
>>715530943Name one 10/10 game you then
>>715531520I'm not getting astroturfed again, people sold me Odyssey as this super masterpiece and It was just an OK to good 3d platformer and nothing more.
Nintendo is just a cult for manchild at this point.
>>715531367It looks like a Fortnite mod, Im sorry I forgot about your inconsequential, please dont cry
>>715531538>serve no purpose at allI forgot you dont like gameplay
>>715530572the fuck is this dumb nonsense?
>>715530572you have 10 seconds to tell everyone here what the narrative is of last year's game of the year
>>715531042>I don't need to prove myself!lmao and you have the nerve to call other "cultist". what a fucking castrated bozo
E33 sissy's already crying
>>715524153>It's fair that this gets a 96/100 when ubislop open world collectathons with the same exact formula and higher production quality get a 7/10ftfy
>>715524009 (OP)Excremation 33 bros...
>>715525073she's clearly wearing a sandal
/thread
How's the Chinese guy doing?
>>715532024>>715532250you should be careful with early celebration. You don't want to get RDR2ed with GOTY.
>>715526008I'll be concise as possible.
Nintendo makes great games. Then, they lock their great videogames in their ecosystem(hardware) which is most of the time, barely good.
Sony and Microsoft are the opposite, most of their games are not that good, their ecosystem are not that good either but at the very least the games are not as locked as Nintendo.
>>715531641God of war Ragnarok
>>715524153Nobody mentions it but itโs because Nintendo is a big publisher and even console manufacturer too. If any outlet gives a bad score they will never get a review copy or console ever again. Although the price of a game is minimal the problem is that outlets want to get early access to make a review and often the embargo (the date and time theyโre allowed to publish their review) is earlier than the release date. That means outlets with review copies get far more clicks and ad impressions since they got to publish reviews early, compared to those who buy the game normally after the release date who now get minimal views. Google itself will prioritize popularity over actual good content meaning the outlet with review copies will get more and more popular and rich. Itโs a phenomenon called access journalism and itโs perfectly allowed. So expect everybody to give 99โs because they want review copies of the next Fire Emblem, Metroid, Xenoblade and whatever.
>>715524153This game isnt open World you retarded nigger
>>715524153>ubisoft>higher production quality
>>715533187They already don't get review consoles. Nintendo doesn't play the press game anymore.
>>715533187god you are such a fucking imbecile.
>>715524153>higher production quality
>>715533515They don't but they also love the recognition. See Aonuma last year at the Game Awards or why Nintendo keeps sending their devs to these awards or using their scores when it's convenient for them.
>>715524153>ubislop open world collectathonsThe fucking bullshit you faggots spout astound me
>>715524009 (OP)It does look like the first Nintendo game with some actual effort put into it in a very long time.
IMO, the only major downside I'm seeing is its disgusting art style.
>>715530572>the top ~20 best gamesOk, then list them faggot. I know you won't because you have never once said what fucking games you play when asked.
>snoyggers are pre-coping.
>>715538529at least wait for the release to stat making up lies. this is fucking pathetic.
>>715538529But can you destroy environments in RoR?
>1 more eepy before i can play DK
can't handle it /v/ros
>Nintendo game gets extremely positive reviews
>something something paid reviews or now remove the Nintendo bonus
>Nintendo game gets good reviews
>HAHAHAHA see [insert Nintendo game] got a lower score than [insert non-Nintendo game]
Every. Time.
>>715539875>paid reviews>when nintendo FUCKING hates journaloids.snoys always ignore this.
>Starfield
>Tears of the Kingdom
>The Last of Us Part 2
>Dragon Age Veilguard
>All near perfect scores
Why would I give a fuck what they think
>>715524009 (OP)They gave Starfield a 95
>>715524414>"no DEI"Going to just ignore them removing genders?
>>715541584only in burgerland, because burgers are mentally ill.
>>715541726no retard, splatoon 3 doesn't have genders on all languages.
Dr. E. and his sidekick are going on a rampage!
>>715524009 (OP)Take 20 points off to compensate for the Nintendo bonus
>>715541882That gets canceled out by the Snoy Seethe Penalty
>>715542085You also have to add 10 points to Astro Bot for the anti-Sony bias.
>>715541726In his defense Splatoon 3 handles it better in other regions, when you are creating your character it's treated like a questionnaire so the structure makes way more sense (and it doesn't even use language like "Style").
English throws this all away, it doesn't keep the questionairre format really and it makes it extra pozzed.
>>715528576Shadows only lets you destroy the whole environment while transformed into a single beast
>thread is literally nothing but cope top to bottom
Kek this is gonna be a fun week
>>715524009 (OP)A great score for a title that is gameplay first. Day 1, obviously! Had a feeling it would be better than Odyssey, more focused.
>>715542212It doesn't "handle it better", it's the same shit, they retained genders in programming but removed gendered language to appease the 1% sex freaks, holy shit I hate nuWeimar so much
>>715542136>anti Sony biasLmao
>>715542136>anti-Sony biasWhen in the history of ANYTHING has this been true?
>>715535898>>715524414>"no DEI"See the thing with "DEI" becoming a buzzword is that it loses meaning and retards like you take it as "Big bad scary thing that I no like." When DEI is just a basic corporate policy. Since you like nintendo they can't be "DEI". This is retarded because not only does nintendo have a DEI policy that's easily found (https://careers.nintendo.com/diversity-equity-and-inclusion/). it's also more robust than most companies. But it didn't even cross your mind because your kind don't deal in reality. it's just your weak feelings and whatever buzzwords your grifters give you all the way down.
>>715542623Journos publish constant negative articles about Sony. Far more than they do Nintendo or Xbox.
>>715542831>Journos publish constant negative articles about Sony.
>>715542831Imagine lying this blatantly
>>715542831Anon link atleast 20 articles about PS5s melting fightsticks or how the liquid metal is inevitably bricking consoles if they are standing up. It should be easy right?
>>715542831Then where are all the articles about ps5s literally melting both internally and melting usbs? Or even the outrageous price of psn?
>>715542831>some tardo uses a switch 1 flashcart on his switch 2, getting him banned from online services>"The Switch 2 LITERALLY bricks itself!">PS5 melts itself during regular play>"..."totally no bias at all
>>715542827Anon why did you think I put no DEI in quotation marks?
When do the embargoes officially lift? Can't wait to see the seethe pour in if a single leaked score is already causing this much asspain.
>>715543352one day before like all nintendo games
>>715524307>bonus>when the journos can't help themselves but roast the switch 2 at every opportunity
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>>715524153>higher production quality get a 7/10realism does not equal higher production quality I wish normal fags would finally understand this
>>715542993>>715542994>>715543095Journos donโt post about the melting because itโs not true
:( I can't afford a switch2
>>715543973but they post about every single lie from reddit.
>>715543973https://kotaku.com/ps5-playstation-5-repair-leak-vertical-liquid-youtube-1849981264
Actually they have posted about some of that stuff and theyโve debunked it
Why is Dr. E posting his garbage on the catalog?
Every jap wants to rape children it would seem.
>>715544440go away, glownigger.
is there a new baidu thread? old one is deleted
>>715524153Someone not being able to tell the difference between point-of-interest slop and collectakino would be called a retard by anyone in real life but on /v/ it's only slightly worse than your average poster.
>>715542831The PS5 is on its last legs and journos STILL haven't really roasted Playstation for raising game prices to 80โฌ.
Isn't that interesting considering how they've treated Nintendo for raising prices to 80โฌ?
I'm mostly looking forward to Raresnoys getting their shit kicked in when the big "leak" ends up being Grinch leak 2.0. It'll be a dual snoy/Rarefag meltdown.
>>715544856Dr. E, stop posting garbage on the catalog.
>>715545018>Rarefaggot trying to invent bogeymen names because his king Eric is getting his kicked in ITT
>>715545105Dr. E is spamming garbage on the catalog because he lost another argument.
>>715542136the meme "sony bonus" was a thing years before you came up with the "nintendo bonus" port
Eric7
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>>71553975828 hours to go bronana
>>715538529So far we know the main story is atleast 25 hours long since each layer is 1 hour and there are 5 layers before each transformation, so for all 5 you'd need to go down atleast 25 layers
>>715524706>DKC>difficultDude, about a year ago I played my DKC cart I got when it came out. Shit is painfully easy. The only difficult stage is one of the last ones with the lift that takes gas
Eric3
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>FUCK BANANZA AND FUCK NINTENDO
>RARE DK WAS BETTER
>>715530108Is this a genuine post? lol Sony niggers are pathetic. Just go watch a movie.
>>715524009 (OP)this might be the time to bring up the question:
Why the fuck does astrobot have the same meta score as odyssey?
Is putting memberberries in the game really enough for snoys to 10/10 a fucking mario sunshine ripoff?
Why doesnโt she ever have shoes on in any of her outfits?
>>715545758I don't know, and it kind of bothers me.
>>715545752I watched gameplay, and it looks fun. Like an average Mario 3D game. To Sony niggers, itโs a masterpiece because theyโre so used to only playing over the shoulder walking simulator slop.
>>715545845In a good way or a bad way?
>>715545758>>715545845shoes are rewards for the diddy kong racing content and most leakers aren't at that point yet and nintendo are hiding it. DK and Pauline both equip shoes when you put them on
>>715545758DK is taking them off to smell them
>>715545752its the only exclusive game to ever come to PS5
and sony dominates western games media because they make movies and cater to western values
Do you think DK has sex with the DK rap playing
>>715545752Because both journos and Sony needed something to flush Concord out of the news cycle. Iโm pretty sure they wouldโve hyped up anything that Sony put out at that time.
>>715546009They also needed something to sweep Concord under the rug, reminder that concord is the biggest flop in entertainment history in all of humanity, its kinda odd how that is already memory holed.
>>715545974>shoes on rewardsNo.
>>715545951>In a good way or a bad way?If you want a serious answer, I'm not sexually attracted to 13-year-old Pauline, and even then I'm not very attracted to feet. I mean more in the sense that I thought it was simply part of her default attire, but now it's looking to be almost completely universal aside from her diva outfit.
Dr. E is a menace to this board.
He hates Mini-Pauline's game so much that he thinks that it's acceptable to spam garbage on the catalog.
>>715524009 (OP)>no modeled anklesfucking sick of nintendo censoring ANYthing sexual, fucking prudes
>>715524307keep up gramps shitting on nintendo is hottest new trend
the real score with new bonuses applied is actually 116
>>715546543why do you always think of porn???
>>715524153Snoys are so weird, this game is not open world, it has nothing to do with Ubisoft slop wtf.
>>715542623This shit was so absurd. Literally zero moral qualms about covering hacks before or since, but the moment that itโs Sony, all of a sudden itโs stolen goods and an big ethical no-no to cover now publicly available info.
>>715544641You first discord tourist.
>>715524153Anyone who believes this is a vidya illiterate, no wonder all snoys believe it, you faggots don't know shit about video games.
>>715544856k rool is too niche for ai to perfectly replicate, your excuse?
>>715545918It'a fun but the movement/platforming sucks, feels completely unrewarding. I hope they keep making platformers though, tired of Sony properties being boring realistic narrative drivel
>>715524153Game isn't open world and Ubisoft games are not collectathons.
How can snoys be so fucking ignorant holy shit, you even have Ubisoft slop as exclusives (Horizon, Ghost of Tsushima) and still don't know what they are?
>>715546626Womenโs feet are inherently sexual.
>>715524687because only a projecting pervert would find anything wrong with her
>>715524307>-10 points Switch 2 bonus My brother in Christ there's an entire anti Switch 2 campaign running right now from journalists. Good thing nobody cares about their opinion though (the fact that you didn't know this proves you don't give a shit either).
Krool
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>>715524009 (OP)all thanks to CHAD Rool
>>715524009 (OP)>those handsIts actually a guy isnt it
The more reasons to develop an emulator, the better.
>>715547178One leaker said she is actually k-rool in disguise
>>715547239There's been quite a bunch of bullshit, but that takes the cake.
Please let it be true i want to see the meltdown
>>715546850Seek help, your mind has been rotted to the core by porn.
>>715547239This is some Aku level of trolling if the 1/10000 chance this is true
>>715524153This took Nintendo 8 years to make and it's their only game, please understand, a lot is riding on it and journos need to continue to do their part to shill for Nintendo's success.
>>715547230Emulator efforts are hamstrung by zoomer pirates being the dumbest fucking people on the planet and loudly paying for emulators. Now theyโve created an entire ecosystem of grifters looking to turn a quick buck with rugpull scams, which has poisoned the well. Itโs going to be impossible for competent enthusiast developers to collaborate on emulation because money and risk are involved now and everyoneโs afraid of scams and getting their work stolen. Nintendo won. Emulators are dead.
>>715524009 (OP)Source? I can't find the score on Metacritic anymore
>>715547449>>715547609Back to Rรซddit/X, samefag. We love womenโs feet here
>>715547230Brace yourself for never ever. The scene and the internet as a whole changed for the worst in eight years. Was fun being a pirate while it lasted.
>>715546974which ending leak is real
>NINTENDO IS PAYING JOURNOS BECAUSE...BECAUSE THEY ARE, OKAY!!
>>715546294She 8s just being polite and not getting shoe marks on DK
>>715547885Summerfags are just the worst. Go drown in a kiddie pool, little Tyreece
Is it really true that HE is in?
>>715533187It gets mentioned occasionally. Certain types just plug their ears and ignore it or lash out though. Journos lost all their integrity ages ago after 8.8 scared them into becoming nothing but industry shills for the biggest players and most rabid fanbases.
>>715545752It doesn't, Odyssey ranks higher in both Metacritic and Opencritic.
>>715546153Pretty sure you can set the music to whatever you like when sleeping with Pauline.
>>715542831Journos publish constant negative articles when the companies stop sending them money, simple as that
>>715547230Get a job, little nigga
>>715533187>If any outlet gives a bad score they will never get a review copy or console ever again>So expect everybody to give 99โs because they want review copies of the next Fire Emblem, Metroid, Xenoblade and whatever.what level of cope is this?
>>715542827You believe men can be women.
FINALLY! Reddit 33 will be dethroned.
>>715524153Ubislop games have ugly women in them. Nintendo games do not. Also put me in the screencap.
>>715524574Yes, ps2 platformers are better than modern rpg bloat.
>>715549793This is a falseflag so that the famitsu schizo can say that "tendies" are forcing a with war e33
>>715549386Let's not pretend that game journos had any integrity before "8.8" happened.
>>715526008Because Nintendo has become a soulless, cancerous shell of their former selves run by an accountant and EA executive. The real question is how any still bends over backwards to shill for them.
>>715549067All we need is sexy Candy Kong and this will be 12/10 game instead of 11/10
>>715548664Nice inspect element, retard. Did r/4chan teach you that?
>>715549960They had some. You will never ever see reviews like this these days.
>>715549946E33 will be getting ported to Switch 2 within a year from now at the absolute latest so trying to force some kind of "rivalrty" here is completely tetarded
I will never understand why people here treat game scores like it's a holy institution. It's like 60 random idiots, it means nothing.
>>715530108You sound like someone who chugs soi milk while playing Nu God of War and Last of Us all day.
>>715550092exactly. He's been doing it since it released
>>715549946Thereโs been a lot of that. I wonder why the focus is on E33 and not Death Stranding 2. Iโve never seen an actual exclusive with less console-warring (granted the threads are slow).
>>715545758because there's no human shoes for her.
>>715550220Nobody is shitposting about DS2 because literally no one give a fuck not even Snoys. It's Days Gone tier.
>>715549946>>715550092>>715550220Look, all I'm saying is get ready for E33 schizos to be making threads starting tomorrow saying " it's doesn't matter that DK is higher rated!! It's still Goty!!" They think they're entitled to Goty for some reason.
HE
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LANKY STATUS?
KROOL STATUS?
SNAKE STATUS?
CALLING CHINA, RESPOND
>>715538529>speedrunningAnd there lies the problem.
>>715550376If you think dk is getting goty you're out of your mind. Don't get your hopes up or they're just getting crushed.
>>715530108Never make games, you would be absolutely shit at it.
>>715546725>glownigger calling me tourist.
>>715550004Candy kong appears at the end of the poppy kong boss fight, it plays a cutscene where it looks like DK is about to lose, but then Candy appears and beats her to death
So where is the chinese leaker?
>>715550771Apparently ninjad by nintendo last thread
Who's on the music for this DK? I assume it's not David Wise?
>>715550087Twilight Princess released in 06 while that sims dlc released in 07. Did game journos grow a spine after TP or before? What are you trying to prove with this "fact"?
>>715550579If fucking Astro Bot (which looks to be vastly inferior to DK) can win Goty then DK can easily win. It won't be fair too if DK substantial out reviews E33 with a 97, 96 and it's not given the award.
>>715550849That you will never ever see reviews like that anymore. Change doesn't happen instantly overnight everywhere. What are you trying to prove?
>>715550771His thread was deleted, allegedly he does have a new one up right now but good luck trying to find it in a chink website lol
>>715550841Woman who did the music for DKC that wise didn't iirc
>>715524547if it's in a physical magazine people get an issue before it's actually released
>>715550841Naoto Kubo is sound director. Same guy as Odyssey. Sounds like heโs working with some other EPD composer. No David Wise. But Iโd be shocked if Kenji Yamamoto werenโt in there somewhere.
>>715550849TP is a good game, and I like the gritty aesthetic i'm not scared to say it. I knoe it looks stupid now but when I was a kid and link to the past and majora's came out they looked like the most gritty evil shit ever it was badass. Twilight princess is the only modern zelda that does that for me again
>>715551192>No David WiseInterest just went to 0.
>>715550686I can confirm this. Worth noting that Candy Kong is now Latina-coded, very fiery. She takes out Poppy using her banana-shaped chancla as a boomerang.
>>715551046Eveline Fischer? She retired nearly two decades ago.
Fun fact, sheโs also Joanna Dark.
Did the China leaker make a new thread?
>>715530108faggot movie game fucker
go back to watching netflix, gaming was better when your kind wasn't in the medium
>>715551550WTF happened to that new Perfect Dark in Egypt or whatever, that was unveiled... like 3 or 4 years ago now?
>>715551356Itโs obvious that EPD Tokyoโs gonna use in-house music people.
>>715551618no, chinese goverment is executing him right now, i'm watching their livestream
>>7155516865 years. Cancelled a couple weeks ago. Entire studio axed without a single game.
>>715550895It's not gonna win because it is Nintendo and journos don't take kindly if there hands aren't greased by companies. BotW only won because games that year were just THAT shit. Astro Bot won because Sony had nothing else to show for their blunders besides an okay platformer. I'd hedge a bet Astro Bot won so Geoff's god Sony would have something to make people forget Concord.
>>715550895If a game of the year goes to a nintendo game wouldn't both metroid and pokemon be just as likely, or do you have some brain issue where you think a number on metacritic guarantees an award?
Can't wait for split fiction to win goty just like it takes two.
>>715547239Idk if i would be disgusted or thrilled.
>>715552076>BotW only won because games that year were just THAT shitPersona 5 had a 95 metacritic score, Mario Odyssey 97 and BotW a 97. 217 was fucking stacked. We also had
>RE7>Nier Automata>Cup Head >Prey>NiohI'd argue 2017 was better than most years and you don't remember because you were too young or have shit taste in games.
>>715544856The head dev said he replayed every previous DK game. Its gonna have an ass load of Rare goodness in it.
>>715531421I hate how many show feet without showing soles it's like seeing breasts in a bra
>>715528754>I don't see a reason to eat caviar when lobster exists
>>715524009 (OP)>Nintendo Power Unlimited
How are we feeling about this?
>>715552248>metroid and pokemon be just as likelyNo chance in hell either gets the praise as DK. This is made by Nintendo EPD. The mainline Mario team. I don't get why you fags don't understand that.
>>715551342I never got the hate TP got later
The intro is way too fucking long and the wolf sections aren't great but it's not enough for me to call the game shit, even if its not my favorite zelda
>>715524009 (OP)We are in for kino then
We support trans people here. I am hecking valid
>>715552663suzanne was proven fake and now this is all you have left. See you thursday!
>>715552757I didn't say anything about "Suzanne".
>>715552663cappy is mario's son
>>715546974I'm hoping this is Pauline Jr, not actual Pauline. That would make the DKC games take place like 20 years before the mario series? That's weird.
>>715552843go back to /vg/. Oh wait, they laughed you out of there too. When will you give up?
How many people have been BTFO over the course of the leaks?
>>715552965Why the fuck are people so against the idea she was de aged and has amnesia from the potion? Its fucking Mario, thats all the logic needed.
>>715553094>she was de-aged then she was turned into a rock and she was given amnesia!That's like three random spells to happen. Why not just one?
Is there a link to all the confirmed leaks?
>>715553094Why the fuck would it not just be an odyssey prequel?
>>715553147The rock thing was entirely to hide the fact it was pauline. Its still used on in store advertising.
>>715524009 (OP)But how will I play it with those shitty controllers anon?
>>715553157ZAMN!! Got any more?
>>715552971When the cutscenes do not show Pauline returning to Odyssey Pauline and/or Mario, and instead, show something else, like Pauline turning into Odyssey Pauline with magic, or anything that does not confirm the Pauline Jr. theory.
>>715553237Because the odds of Nintendo giving a fuck to make it an elaborate prequel game, are significantly less than "lol magical nonsense".
>>715553294NTA, use a pro controller.
>>715553267>after beating k rool>pauline goes "dk.... i have to tell you something important...">collapses into a pile of skin>mario jumps out of it and goes WAHOO>"ITS A ME ALL ALONG NOW IMMA GONNA KILL YOU"is that what this image is implying
>>715553267The denim and the pose are too on the nose, and exactly the kind of hint that creators will leave in to make it feel natural. Pauline has always worn dresses, and shown no interest in denim. Why the change?
If they make a Super Pauline Jr. game, then she could be like Shantae: singing does transformations.
>>715553434No, it implies that Mario's mannerisms can be passed down to his daughter.
>>715545472There's more likely about 15 layers, as the zebra and ostrich forms at on branching paths.
The pathway would be Kong -> Zebra/Ostrich -> Elephant -> Snake it seems
>>715553651i like my theory better, secret mario final boss would be awesome
Got a copy, I'm guessing the earliest time I can stream without getting banned like that other guy is midnight japan time?
>>715525073>>715526326>always wondered why nobody ever ripped her model>looked into it and the game is some some specific shit ubisoft engine that normal ripping tools don't work onquite the shame, would have been fun to make some stuff of her domming mortal heroes.
>>715553030I've been seeing the AI cope posts decrease in quantity ever since the Elephant form was revealed, all we need at this point is to see the snake form and literally any other shot of K Rool outside of the ones we've already seen.
>>715553357it's not elaborate in the slightest this arguments are only happening because autistic manbabies that need to overanalyse everything throw tantrums if their babysit game from 30 years ago doesn't line up with their baby shit game releasing now.
Pauline growing into singing as a talent fits perfectly with her being an established singer in odyssey. My 8 year old brother figured this out lmfao.
>>715553726Stream somewhere that isn't Twitch.
Or, better yet, just speed through the game and post screenshots/clips here.
>>715552663>k rool's thought process in making his disguise
>>715553571Arnt the miner monkeys wearing the same pants?
>>715524009 (OP)>First DK Bananza review leakedand where is it? not that I don't believe it but I want to read it
so?
>>715553696I would prefer it be Scorned Stanley mind controlling K Rool.
>>715553831And its just as reasonable to assume those are memories of who she really is.
>>715553996>pauline is actually mario>k rool is actually stanley>dk is actually luigi
>>715553726Probably tomorrow, that's when embargo is up.
>>715554201That's usually in the morning when the reviews drop yeah?
>>715552663based schizoposter
>>715554275This makes Kremling doubters shit and piss themselves in fear.
>>715553726Just do screenshots here
>>715554103you're saying
>young pauline -> rockis less reasonable than
>pauline -> de-aged -> memory wiped -> rock are you trolling or just retarded?
>>715554253Yeah. I wouldn't take what I'm saying as the green light but it's an educated guess.
>>715553726Just save a couple webms of the important stuff.
>>715554275Ganesh is very angry.
At this point I can't tell if the people that think this game is open world are baiting or have been genuinely brainwashed into beliving it is.
>>715553434the ol' hide-in-a-barefoot-hebe-suit-with-a-hammer, he'll never see it coming
>>715554637It's an openly destructible world, I think that counts ยฏ\_(ใ)_/ยฏ
>>715554838destructible levels*
>>715554367>no responseTrolling.
>>715524009 (OP)sex with pauloli
this and superman are the most astroturfed forced ass "success" story after E33. this site is becoming a shill hive
>>715554275AntiKroolfags...
>>715555174needs more buzzwords try again
>>715555263yeah bro mentioning shit thats constantly shilled means saying buzzwords
>>715555174>implying E33 wasn't shilled
Do we know if the big cock croc who'll rock your stocks leaving you shocked and got is in it?
>>715555174Superman was good and won
>>715554367Yes im saying the idea that it's being set up as a prequel is less reasonable than it just being magic. Im not against the idea that it is a prequel or even new character entirely, but the odds are simply much less. And if the simple assumption is that its a prequel because she is young, you also have to factor in how other Kongs like Diddy and Dixie work. Are there multiple sets of other Kongs just like Cranky>Jr>DK?
>>715555174I'm actually happy Superman bombed overseas because now we can reasonably, confidently assume that anyone who didn't like it is a dumb ESL
>>715555409he is, we got four screenshots confirming it
>>715555409No it was all ai
>>715555483>just being magicDisingenuous. She got affected by magic in both of the cases, and one is much less convoluted than the other. Which of the two cases do you think is less likely to happen?
>>715524009 (OP)There's no fucking way that's accurate. I can see this thing in the mid 80s.
>>715555483>Are there multiple sets of other Kongs just like Cranky>Jr>DK?Why wouldn't there be? Has it been explicitly stated?
>game confirms that DK is DK Jr.
>DK was the 2nd playable Mario character before even Luigi
Post YFW Cruel is in Decay Banana
>>715555728Im saying its less likely that a newly introduced past version of Pauline gets turned into a rock, than it is adult Pauline whom has been pushed in multi recent games, getting kidnapped and de aged, likely by the very potions we see one of the villains in possession of, to better control her, before being bound into a stone for still being a disobedient little cunt and not doing what she was captured to do.
>niggas trying to debate DK lore before the game even comes out
The game is out in just over 24 hours chill
monke
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>>715555174I know what you are
>>715555819No, its entirely possible in the realm of ideas, but very slim in the realm of Nintendo giving a shit.
>>715556258The leaks made this sound so much dumber and unfunny than it actually was
Lex really did feel like a Mr Burns type cartoon character where it's just an endless series of cartoonish absurdities he can pull off because he's rich. Fucking amazing
>>715554275This one actually looks good
>>715556095>newly introduced past versionYou're retarded.
>>715555548I wanna be in Kara's harem
>>715524009 (OP)I really shouldn't expect this to be some kind of masterpiece just because it play like Odyssey. Anyone feel the same way?
>>715552663this is still the best theory so far
>>715556515I feel like they have to address this in the sequel lol
>>715526254This game isn't open world you stupid nigger
>>715546974>King K. Ripple
Can a hollow world be open?
>>715553094Sunk cost fallacy, all the people coping that the lore didn't matter got btfo by the interviews
>>715524153How does one type this with a straight face?
>>715557173how dare you call her fat
>>715531053not enough cinematic cutscenes for you?
>>715557173>no hidden AK47 shape in her designdebunked
>>715557173>fathas never been around preteens award
>>715531053>it looks like one of those n64 platformers with better graphics and destructible environmentsnice
They show the ending yet?
>>715552885kek how come no one saw this
>>715557846That chink that showcased Elephant Bananza was as far as we got to the ending so far and he has already been caught by the ninjas, better wait 'til tomorrow to ask again
>>715557846Wizpig shows up and kidnaps Pauline and DK races to the stars to stop him.
>>715557173Here is the updated version.
>>715553184There was (chinese posts)
EVERYONE IS PLOTTING AGAINST ME
THEY'RE MUTTERING BEHIND ME, I SMELL A SCAM
DONKEY KONG AND PAULINE WORKING TOGETHER
HOW NAIVE DO THEY THINK I AM?
>>715524009 (OP)*stutters in your thread*
>>715530108i think the game looks like trash but your take is even worse
>>715557846No, last confirmed thing was layer 1000 which seems to be a desert
>>715524153>It's unfair how this gets a 96/100 when completely different game get a 7/10Retard
Pauline says "Waaaah!" when she falls out of the level.
>>715546153Only when he is an orgy with the other members of the DK crew
>F.ck GoldenEye 007, f.ck Half-Life, f.ck Halo: Combat Evolved. Hell, f.ck DOOM (2016). DOOM Eternal is, in my professional opinion, the new best first-person shooter of all time.
>final boss is actually a musical
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eOjnOs3a7cM
>>715559373is he playing right now?
>>715559521Nope, this was from last night and it was one of the last screencaps shared before his thread in baidu got nuked
>>715559492https://youtu.be/_b1m5lRxVJ0
>>715559521this one came last night
SAAR
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>>715559373we won SAAR bros
HE'S THE LEADER OF THE CUNNYS YOU KNOW HIM WELL
>>715559689>Jeffrey>Ep-i-stein
>>715559373How different are all of the bananza introduction cutscenes from each other?
has the snek bananza been leaked yet?
>>715524153>Ubisoft makes collectathons>Bananza is open worldHas Nintendo completely mindbroken people?
>>715531053>it looks like a fun game
are all reviews out tomorrow morning?
I feel bad spoiling myself on any stuff, but i wont be getting a swish 2 for years.
Where are BeardBear and ProsafiaGaming?
>>715559647Looks like an African Elephant to me
>>715560565Waiting for the second the game is officially released so they can set their private videos to public
>>715560565Tomorrow is my bet
>>715560565Nintendo's been actively taking stuff down across all sites so any decently big account is 100% going to be keeping their nose down
Void kong bros, it was supposed to be our timeโฆ
How come we don't have video of K Rool?
I think we rused ourselves.
>>715561047Post-story boss is my hunch for the rat monkey
>>715560742The cutscene videos are posted early.
Odyssey's ending was leaked on the 25th, and the cutscenes were uploaded to YouTube on the 26th.
The ending should be available to watch on YouTube by now.
We got to see Rainbow Road around June 3rd, what happened here?
>>715561108I love K Rool but thatโs pretty fucked up of him to steal his spotlight
Did the chinese dude not post anything new since he went to sleep like 20 hours ago?
>>715561379He never woke up :(
>>715561379nintendo got him
>>715561379chinesu wort scheduru issu verry tiringu, preasu underustundu
>>715561379I think he just gave up after his thread was nuked
should I also grab a copy of cyberpunk2077 when I go pick up dkb?
>>715561047>>715561108>>715561271the final boss was never spoiled, the k.rool fight takes place before the actual fight
it could still be k.rool again but there is a chance void kong is the final boss
If you cannot choose between Japanese and English dub,
I would personally stick the game box in Miyamoto's ass.
I'd dig up Iwata's corpse to do the same to it.
>>715561606you won't do shit, tranny
>>715561119The intro cutscene is live now, I expect the ending to be up tomorrow at some point https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E5GQJLOlM7Y
>>715561606To ease your worries, the guy who was playing on Twitch earlier today confirmed you can change the language of Pauline, but you cannot mute her completely.
>>715561671Is that.. a NAKED KONG?!
K Rool better be fully voiced
>>715561606Mario is inherently western. Choosing the English dub is the equivalent of watching a western cartoon in English.
>>715524615>the game wasnโt a blip on anyoneโs radar until [the direct where they revealed a bunch of shit about the game]whoa, no way
>>715561578And then King K. Rool becomes good, and then does a good deed that earns him his own avenue in New Donk City.
>>715562223not really since mario is a nippon created, same goes for lady & jumpman
>>715562242>happens with 3d World>happens with Odyssey>happens with Bowser's Fury to a lesser extentI just don't get it anon
>>715562316k rool getting the wario treatment, with his own spinoffs
>>715562324It's Japanese made, but Nintendo's priority is always English voices. They're the original, not the Japanese.
>>715524009 (OP)Remember that this game is avrage and a 6-7/10 just like mario odessey. Its the same game with banana collection like odessey and almost the same gameply.
Everyone that gives it a 9/10 and 10/10 are paid retarded chills.
>>715562664What is wrong with you?
Also please stop spamming your garbage on the catalog.
>>715561379The suicide net malfunctioned.
>>715562664Have you finished the game then, roody poo? I don't believe you, you seem the dishonest type desu
>>715562664Wipe away your tears next time you post, your anger typos are showing.
The original designer of Donkey Kong Country just quit Rare last week during the Microsoft fiasco. I hope he plays this new game and realizes that lots of people still care immensely about his work.
>>715559373PRรรรรรรรรรรOhoohhhhhhh
>>715562664> retarded chills.
ye
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>>715561578>K. Rool wants purely revenge on DK for destroying his pirate empire>both end up working together to defeat Void who transforms into a big Kong and kidnaps Pauline and climbs up some large structure you have to climb up as well>Rool leaves to wander the world now settled on just being a Wario like rival to DK and he gets his own spin-off game where he attempts to recruit new minions
>>715561047>>715561108>>715561271Reminds me of that episode of The Powerpuff Girls where Mojo Jojo created an ultimate plan to destroy the girls and loses it while sleeping to the Amoeba Boys and the girls later think Mojo was stealing THEIR ultimate plan
>>715555174>newfag hates good media
>Last mainline game appearance was dressing up as a Victor Frankenstein parody
>Supposedly the main mcguffin that drives the entire plot of the game
How does he do it?
>Confirmed return in Bananza
>DK movie confirmed
>Jim Carrey previously played Eggman
Jim Carrey will be K. Rool for the DK movie bros!
So is the game technically about eating little bits of k roolโs belly?
>>715563251Still, itโs a giant leap from his last outing. Iโm exited for whatever the devs are doing with him though
>>715561671>bunch of Tim Allen grunts
>>715563263No, retard-kun. I'm impressed you can form sentences though, excellent work.
wot
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>>715524615>characters name is the same as the game that made Nintendo a house hold name>side character
Klump
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>>715563145They had to turn him into some kind of mystical journey to the west hollow earth dinosaur to get him away from the American colonialism parody he originally was.
>>715563404>k roolโs belly is the banandium root>the banandium root grows banandium gems>dk eats banandium gems
>>715562324Where is Mario's jap voice in games?
>>715562858Heโll just join Playtonic and shit out a poor manโs Banjo Tooie
>>715563502Odd since this game is all about taking down a greedy symbol of capitalism invading other lands in order to drill for its resources
>>715563598He made both Banjo games in the first place.
>>715563034>DK defeats Void Kong at the top of 25m, and he and Pauline celebrate>Suddenly, Mario appears below>DK freaks out and starts throwing barrels down the girders, not wanting to give Pauline to Mario>Mario dodges the barrels and gets to the top>"My-a daughter..."
>>715564051The dumbest shit ever. Not happening
Gonna get the game when I get home, how big is it again
>>715564162Why is it dumb?
I don't think it will happen, however I do enjoy coming up with creative endings.
>>715564629I ain't your mate, pal
>>715564395so the game is 5 hours long tops. what a scam
>>715564898>he thinks file size equals game lengthlmao