>>715706614 (OP)I'm actually happy about all this.
I used to be pretty miserable and shameful of some of the stuff I ended up jerking off to, especially when I noticed just how far I felt into this cesspit of worse and worse fetishes over time.
It started with just vanilla sex and impregnation, then it went into shotacon, but at least still in the lovey dovey territory, but then at some point it just dive into more and more degenerate shit like rape, bestiality, interracial, cheating / netorare and I was slowly veering of the point I considering doing gay shit like shoving dildos up my ass so I could just cum from massaging my prostate, although, thank God it never got THAT far. I would genuinely feel miserable and ashamed every time I ended up cumming to that type of stuff, then I would just question what the fuck is wrong with me and why am I just stuck with this being the main thing I get pleasure out of when I look at porn, then I would vow to never touch it again, only for me to do it just a few days or a week later and then the cycle would just repeat.
Ever since I became properly Christian instead of just Agnostic and ask Jesus to help deliver me from this and keep me away from it, I've had a seemingly quick change in away from all of this. I stopped consuming porn altogether, even though I failed initially, a good amount of times, I just immediately apologized for it to God then asked Him to keep helping me with it, which he did, because the first time, I was barely able to last 2 weeks without interacting with porn, but afterwards, I managed to go a whole month without it, even though it was VERY hard at times, I would get actual withdrawal-like physical symptoms and cravings from not engaging with porn, it was wild to see it acting like that, but I just asked God to give me strength and then I managed to pull through, and it genuinely feels better than ever before.
Porn makes you miserable and takes away your time and energy. You need to step away from it.