Thread 715933685

Feeling like a really goblinpilled gamer right now

>>715933685 (OP)
Hobgoblin is shit, literally all it has going for it is the silly lables.

all beer tastes the same (like ass)

>>715934174
Name some better beers then. Their king goblin variety is pretty good imo

I'm gnot a gnelf

>>715935685
you been eating some really yeasty ass

>>715933685 (OP)
>Hobgoblin gold
highly based gamer

>>715933685 (OP)
>zesty

>>715935685
This is literally impossible with all the different styles and variations on styles, and that’s before you start getting into the actually flavored beers that are infused with things like blueberry puree or lemon wheat grass

You’re retarded and gay

>>715940346
>You’re retarded and gay
says the guy with pink rgb keyboard playing world of trannies
beer is rotting bread water retards drink cause it makes their already shrunken downie brain tingle the 2 active neurons they use to piss and shit

>>715940965
Zero pussy behavior

>>715941023
youre drinking 3 cartoon goblin beers on a saturday night
you are the definition of zero pussy brother

>>715940965
This post reeks of underage

>>715940965
weed is better but alcohol is still fun and tasty

I think you should head on back fren :)

>>715933685 (OP)
>beer
Enjoy your manboobs and saggy gut.

>>715935685
absolutely wrong
you can hate the taste but if you think a dark beer and a light beer taste the same you don't have a taste bud in your body

>>715942898
Listen to this guy op. I drank 4 beers a night for 6 months straight a few years ago and got a perma belly. Not fat anymore but used to have natural abs and the beer erased it. 3 years later still skinnyfat when I used to just be skinny

>>715933685 (OP)
looking like a goblinpilsnered gamer

>still not a single good hgame with goblin girls
PAIN

>>715937593
gordon finest gold
guillotine

>>715944661
I’ll look out for these next time I’m buying some brews

>>715943359
>I consumed too much of [thing], that means you should never ever consume it!
retard

>>715945658
I wasn't the one who called your beer taste shit tough, I think hobgoblin is ok, but I like stronger flavours, also those have a lot of alcohol so eat something before drinking

also judas

but yeah, gordon finest gold is like the best ever FOR ME

>>715946149
I used to drink nothing but gin neat and navy strength rum also neat. I don’t think I’ve ever gotten drunk on beer and not for lack of trying. I’ll buy a bunch of beer and drink it all in one night and usually run out before getting anything more than tipsy.

I drink beer because I like the taste and I do love beers with higher AC. I think I just like the taste of alcohol. I’m actually looking forward to this stronger beer you’ve informed me about

where are the sexy goblins
>>715943580
this made me laugh

>>715933685 (OP)
>go in expecting a goblin thread
>it's a beer thread
The day just started and I'm already full of disappointment

>>715946734
Just buy 12° beers, it will get you drunk and it taste breddy good usually

>>715946961
It can be both if we put some effort in
>>715943650
Goblins are the most oppressed race in the world

>>715933685 (OP)
https://youtu.be/Tc8iu0XFUQc?feature=shared

>>715946852
>where are the sexy goblins
in my bed, freshly bred

>>715947207
I like gordon finest gold 10º more than platinium 12º

>>715946734
maybe you need a break from drinking or not making it a daily thing, I did it when I didn't felt drunk unless drinking too much

>>715933685 (OP)
only retards drinking beer.

gawblin fuckn

>>715933685 (OP)
shalom

>>715947217
on my party this wouldn't be tea

>>715933685 (OP)
What are some goblinkino games?
Surely WoW isn't the only game that let's you be one.

>>715951521
There are no games with good looking golbins besides the female one from WoW.

>>715933685 (OP)
None of their ruby ale? What are you doing mate

>>715951581
What about non lewd gobbo content? I know Warhammer Online has 2 gobbo classes.

>>715935685
>all beer tastes the same
no

>Write a story about a human and a Goblin chick going cross country to go see his estranged dad before he dies.
>The story's romance aspect gets dropped a fourth of the way through to world build on how Elves, Dwarves, and Goblins exist in human society, namely the latter, and how there are differences physiologically between her and the feral ones that live in the mountains, like wolves vs. dogs and the like.
>Don't know how to tie the romance part back to it.
I am retard.

>>715951960
You have fallen into the exact same trap every isekai slop mangaka falls into

>>715933685 (OP)
>dogshit beer
>dogshit game
a match made in gnomergon

>>715935685
you're either a really frail 30 year old or underage. either way you're a faggot

>>715937593
>Name some better beers then
Bud

>>715935685
All alcohol tastes like ass

>>715933685 (OP)
>great labels
>tastes like piss
I hate beer

>>715951960
get them drunk, let them fuck, they dont know how to adress what they did when they were drunk so they just fuck again. i accept my pulitzer prize now

>>715952170
Here's the thing, it's not fantasy. It takes place in 1996 Texas.
>>715952973
I might actually do that. They don't drink so they'll be lightweights.

No, no. Gotta do my part. Mmmmm.

>>715953113
>It takes place in 1996 Texas
urban or contemporary fantasy?

>>715935685
18+ site, Timmy.

>>715935685
how do you make porter taste a like weizen?

>>715935685
>(like ass)
Asses can taste very different though.
Checkmate.

>>715943359
>I deliperately consumed 1000 excess empty calories a day for 6 months and now I am fat
>how could this be happening to me?!

>>715953328
Mix of both.
>Dragons exist in the old world and new but are highly varied: Dragons in the new world are more like flying serpents and are critically endangered.
>Elves in the old world are more stereotypical, whilst in the new world they're sort of seen as analogous to Gnomes.
>Gnomes also exist, leading to some animosity whenever someone gets them confused.
>There isn't any magic, or, if there was, it's long gone.
>The world religions we know still exist, and are practiced, but in the case of the Goblin, she practices a modern take on an old Goblin religion, which will lead to minor conflict with the more "Redneck"(feral) mountain Goblins. She practices a sanitized monotheistic form, while they still practice a more archaic polytheistic form.
>Dwarf Bro, the protagonists best friend from when he was a boy, comes from England and rebukes the stereotype, hates digging and being underground.
Im a way, it's more of a "What if D&D was real?" type spiel, albeit with no magic.

>>715953901
>Protagonist: White-Hispanic country boi.
>Dwarf Bro: Came to Austin as a boy, became best buds with Protagonist.
>Goblin Gal: Modern Goblin Woman, wants to do it all! Or so she wants. She's the weirdo of the group, having an internet connection which she claims will be big, though her friends call it a fad.
>Protagonist received a letter from his dad that he needs to see him, and that means going to Utah.
>Has been stressed out at work and so takes PTO and decides to make the drive, and Goblin Gal and Dwarf Bro accompany him.

>>715943359
Pathetic

>>715935685
Coffee*

Little green whores owe me sex. I have no interest in Warcraft whatsoever but I find their goblins particularly alluring, I think it's their pointy features.

I prefer sour beer

>>715956359
LITTERALLY the only reason why i can accept small dom/big sub

>>715935685
Why out yourself as 12 man?

>>715935685
It's like coffee, in that its drank performatively by people who want to "belong". Everyone seems to do it, so they do it to. The so-called "acquired taste" is just applied parasocial faggotry and addiction. The "flavors" of beer concern the alcohol content: the faster you become intoxicated, the better it tastes -- that's it.

>>715943359
Beer feeds fungi and other parasites (helminths, protozoa). You won't recover until you treat yourself against these critters.

>>715951521
Despite all the goblin meme posting not a single dev has made a game with sexy goblins. What the FUCK is their problem?

>>715935685
there are some that taste nice but they are considered gay for some reason. it's best not to drink alcohol at all

>>715935685
people hated on him, for he spoke the truth

>>715957313
This poster is a 30 year old virgin.

>>715953650
Some kind of shroom colony? Looks like a nose/scrotum-based teratoma, to be perfectly candid.

>>715957736
he's right and you're a virgin despite drinking alcohol and coffee

>>715957313
Everybody knows that all alcohol inherently tastes like shit. Like actual fucking poison and rot, because it is. Coffee can at least cover up the bitterness and bad taste with cream and sugar.
It's a moot point either way because you drink both for the effect, not for its taste.

>>715941023
Needing the alcohol to make a bitch to put out
Pathetic. For all intents and purposes, you are a functional celibate.

>>715957736
>virgin
Niggercattle, you can only navigate social encounters when drunk in bitter piss. Dial up the brightness if your display and find yourself a proper mirror to scream at.
>>715958152
>you drink both for the effect, not for its taste
>effect
Like the niggercattle above, you can only operate your body when under the influence of stimulants? You drink either because you let yourself get peer-pressured. The taste signals to your body that its poison, you still consume it.

>>715958646
Yes, I drink poison because I like the effect. Stupid nigger. Why the fuck wouldn't I? It's fun. It feels good. It's worth the "payment" of drinking it. Dipshit, do you only imbibe in things that's specifically beneficial for you in a biological sense? You call me niggercattle, but you're a fuckstick niggerfaggot. Kill yourself.

Straight edge kids are still a thing?

>>715958646
>getting drunk on beer
>”dude people only drink to socialise”
This poster is underaged

>coffee
>Beer
>Soda
>I'm just drinking water

>>715959291
Based fellow water enjoyer

fuck goblins

>>715958646
>you can only navigate social encounters
hahahahaha a 4chinner talking about navigating social situations, now that is fucking rich

>>715935685
This, my dad let me have a sip of his beer yesterday at a family barbeque and it tasted like garbage. I grimaced and spit it out and everyone laughed at me, and I just grabbed another energy drink. And no, I'm not underage. I'm 38.

>>715960269
gladly

>>715960368
This is embarrassing
>40 year old anon sipping his dad’s beer for the first time and spitting out

>>715960776
nice

>>715952837
>American "beer"
That's the worst beer humanity has dreamed up.

>>715937593
miller lite

>>715951581
bg3 has sazza

>>715961081
she has way to little porn

>>715960368
This isn't something to boast about, anon. This makes you look mentally stunted.
>I tried daddy's drinky and it was icky!
>So I had my sugary drinky instead!
>By the way I'm a grown ass man approaching middle age

>>715960368
>another energy drink
That's even worse for you, and holy shit who drinks those things in their late 30s?

>>715961331
Jazel my beloved.

What are some good goblin games? I saw that Styx is getting a new one after all this time.

>>715933685 (OP)
>alcohol
kys

>>715941023
If you need to be in a drunken setting to get women you are probably well on your way to a sex offender registry.

>>715962108
>a bit of caffeine is worse than liver destroying, life ending poison

Alcohol is literally for subhumans who think that destroying their inhibitions and acting like a retard might get them a crumb of pussy lol

>>715935685
based
cider > beer any day, it's actually a refreshing drink

>>715962364
>a bit of caffeine is worse than liver destroying, life ending poison
>A bit of caffeine
>A bit
>He doesn't know

>>715933685 (OP)
oh hey it's the funny drink

>>715962582
Caffeine is harmless even in thousands and thousands of mgs. Even one beer objectively, irrefutably causes brain and liver damage.

Bully goblin girls.

>>715962798
:c

>>715957313
by this logic almost every single thing you drink is simply chemicals tricking the brain and is also just as pretentious

>>715957419
I tried to treat mine with a different brand of lager, but to no avail.

>>715962798
>you're not welcome here g.o.b.l.i.n.
what did they mean by this

>>715962798
Now post her being loved and cherished >:(

For me it's a crisp golden ale

>>715963251
Naturally, there is no such picture.
No happy endings for goblins.
Only death and terror.

>>715962798
poor thing

If beer "tasted good", everyone (including teenagers) would drink non-alcoholic versions of beer, but nobody does because it's trash and an act to enjoy it. You like it in the same way everyone would enjoy dried up dog turds if that was the only delivery method for heroin. You'd be talking about the smokey and earthy flavors of particular dog turds like cringelords.

>>715957739
It's cow stomach(s).

>>715963460
based

>>715963460
Non alcoholic beer is a thing though

>>715963460
lite beers taste just like water and are refreshing after a long days work.

>>715963656
No shit retard, but no one drinks it.

>>715963460
I sell so much of the non-alcoholic Carlsberg beer at the store. You have no idea.

>>715962108
I like them with vodka when painting minis

>>715935685
try a stout or something, from a real brewery

>>715958758
>It's fun. It feels good. It's worth the "payment" of drinking it.
Aha.
>Dipshit, do you only imbibe in things that's specifically beneficial for you in a biological sense?
Why would I poison myself?
>>715960324
Anon, I...
>>715962851
>what's clean water
Oy vey.
>>715962967
>different kind of lager
You're just a skinsuit to Candida at this point.

>>715960368
>and I just grabbed another energy drink. And no, I'm not underage. I'm 38.
We call it "arrested development."

>>715935685
This, I don't know why people pretend otherwise. I'm 35 and I still think all beer tastes awful.

>>715947217
>Go home, goblin girl!
>They leveled up.

>>715963460
Stop drinking 4.5% swill.

A proper 10% dark ale or fruit based ones taste fucking good.

the reason people think beers taste bad is simply because they never had a real one. a shitty american beer from the convenience store doesn't count.

hell, a fucking can of guinness is better.

>>715963859
Oh an anecdote? Well I've never seen anyone irl drink it, never seen anyone in the checkout line with it, never seen it at any food chain (large or small), not at fast food places, nothing.. hmmm curious...

>>715933685 (OP)
>Hobgoblin
Damn, it's been a while since I've seen that beer. You used to get it in the United States.

beer haters should try cocktails

pic related - cuba libre: rum + cola + lime + ice. cheap and easy to make. tastes good

>>715963460
Based anon checkmating the alcoholics.

>>715964539
when is this game coming out?

>>715964627
Fuck if i know. Since the kickstarter finished i havent seen a single thread

>>715933685 (OP)
I think I had some of these a few years ago. Not too bad, but I kind of stopped trying different beers and just settled for the occasional big brand eight pack.
Speaking of, I have like eight bottles of whiskey I keep forgetting about. I don't know how alcoholics do it.

>>715964539
I liked the box art but fucking despise the Jax and Dexter gameplay

>>715964539
>>715964627
>>715964751
what game is it?

Did you know Goblin vaginas can stretch up in to their chest cavities and thus they can accommodate far bigger insertions than you'd think would be possible? Fascinating creatures!

>>715964842
It's not my favorite genre either, but the goblin t'n'a is worth 20 hours or a full playthrough if we really get mod support.
>>715964865
geargrit

>>715964927
Does that also include the other holes, what if she needs to be airtight?

>>715935685
i get what you're saying, having started my drinking career with beer im at a point where I cant stand it now
they do have different flavors but ultimately the "core" taste is the same
>makes you piss every 15min
>gives you headaches
>one of the worst feelings when coming off of it
>one of the worst hangovers from it

>>715965229
Thanks.

You could easily out drink a goblin in reality

>>715965424
What if they have super efficient livers?

You know what I like about goblins? They don't have human rights so it's okay to just steal one and take her to your home, feed her, wash her, fuck her, and let her sleep in your bed

>>715965695
Goddess.

>>715965424
>>715961081
BG3's biggest crime is not letting us fuck gobba girls.

Sazza would have been a perfect pet companion for Tav who you rope into your camp after saving her from Minthara. After trying to betray you and finding out you are a True Soul and you let Minthara keep her alive, you should have made her beholden to you and made into your gobbo camp cocksleeve.

>>715933685 (OP)
Gosblins are supposed to be nasty

>>715965719
That is exactly what they want anon! Its a trap to expand their population

>>715965330
to avoid hangover you need to eat before drinking alcohol, drink plenty of water, try not to fall asleep until it wears off a little, sleep enough and have a good breakfast when you wake up

>>715965424
>Retard gob enters human village for the first time
>Challenges everyone at the bat to a drinking competition
>Best drinker in her cave
>Has never drunken with humans before
>Wakes up with her head in the toilet.
>Full to the brim in every hole with semen
Stupid creatures

>>715965872
I have 458 gobbos.

>>715966041
i know how to drink but you are missing the point

>>715963802
Why would you drink it when you can just drink beer?

>Clap! Snap! the black crack!
>Grip, grab! Pinch, nab!
>And down down to Goblin-town
>You go, my lad!

>Clash, crash! Crush, smash!
>Hammer and tongs! Knocker and gongs!
>Pound, pound, far underground!
>Ho, ho! my lad!

>Swish, smack! Whip crack!
>Batter and beat! Yammer and bleat!
>Work, work! Nor dare to shirk,
>While Goblins quaff, and Goblins laugh,
>Round and round far underground
>Below, my lad!

>Fifteen birds in five fir-trees,
>their feathers were fanned in a fiery breeze!
>But, funny little birds, they had no wings!
>O what shall we do with the funny little things?
>Roast 'em alive, or stew them in a pot;
>fry them, boil them and eat them hot?

>Burn, burn tree and fern!
>Shrivel and scorch! A fizzling torch
>To light the night for our delight,
>Ya hey!

>Bake and toast 'em, fry and roast ’em
>till beards blaze, and eyes glaze;
>till hair smells and skins crack,
>fat melts, and bones black
>in cinders lie
>beneath the sky!

>So dwarves shall die,
>and light the night for our delight,
>Ya hey!
>Ya-harri-hey!
>Ya hoy!

I've turned to coke in my middle aged days when I started earning money for my days with the lads since alcohol makes me feel like shit the next day.

>>715935685
replies will call this guy a child but they'll never prove him wrong

>>715965305
I'm afraid science hasn't gone that far yet

chose the form of the destructor

>"goblin girls"
>They've all been given small noses

>>715966474
Shut the fuck up bitch. People have work in the morning

>>715966636
Based schnoz appreciator.

>>715966564
>Kobbies with tits
Yes good. No-tit having kobolds a SHIT.

>>715966636
No one sane likes the jewish noses.

>>715966564
With goblins feel like they would stab you in the throat if you give them a chance while kobolds will always remain loyal if you convince them.

>>715967356
i want them all except the one with the crown and the one with the eye patch, i mean i would still creampie them but they are not allowed to sleep in my bed

>>715935685
Beer is disgusting, it always makes me feel sick. That's why I stick to vodka.

>>715967093
>No one sane likes the jewish noses.
You could say the same about wanting to fuck green midgets.

>>715967690
Except goblins aren't proper midgets, they have proper limbs and aren't deformed whilst also being stacked as fuck.
They don't appeal to a lot of normies but they still appeal to a lot of people.
Yet massive noses have always been looked at as an ugly thing or associated with unpleasantness and beastliness, hence why they were attached to goblins.
Keeping them attached to goblins lessens the appeal.

>>715966564
Easy.

Incase gobbies with Forasteros hairs.

>>715967912
>Yet massive noses have always been looked at as an ugly thing or associated with unpleasantness and beastliness
I wonder if our subconscious is trying to tell us something...

>>715967856
>>715967914
Hate sex with the advisor behind the queens back

>>715963460
This, but coffee.

>>715967856
I swear I've seen this character somewhere
She fucks humans, pretty sure, sadly I forgot the source

>>715967856
>no sharp toenails
shite

>>715968528
that blond human rails the shit out of her every hole in one of there comic strips

>>715968716
I posted before reverse searching, which was a mistake, and now I'm looking at the comic

>>715966564
kobold is better because she might introduce you to her dragonlord so you can fuck a dragon too which is cool

>>715968769
looking at goblin porn is never a mistake

I've had this idea of a "little creatures games" where it's a dungeon crawler where you as the protagonist collect a set number unique of goblins, kobolds and maybe some other little races to fight with you like pokemon because you as the protagonist can't fight for shit. Romance is of course present.

Unfortunately I don't know how to code for shit.

>>715969476
alternatively, a human baby gets stolen in a raid by goblins and is raised as one

I thought hobgoblin was discontinued

>>715969476
>Main enemy faction is a bunch of imps
>They want to capture (you) for their succubus masters
>Your loyal tribe of gob girls will fight to the death to defend your honor
>Kobolds and goblins have a blood feud going on
>This manifests as simple games though as the imps are the true enemy
>Headpats level them up

Get off your ass nigger

>>715966564
There is another...

>>715969476
I also was gonna make a shortstack game, paper mario clone with a imp as the protag who "convinces" a gob and a kobold to become her friends and they go on an adventure to kill the wizard who summoned the imp. It was gonna be heavy on cheesecake but not pornographic.
Shelved it for another project but maybe I'll come back to it someday.