Thread 716444473

So he just literally hates everything now, huh?

>>716444473 (OP)
>No kid plays 3D platformers so they should all be targeted at adults
What

>>716444473 (OP)
hes a miserable ugly balding ragebait retard 30+yo, would be pretty hard to enjoy anything at the pont i image

Yes. That's why he's /v/'s chosen son

>>716444473 (OP)
he hates slop which this is.
other dk games didn't have brainrot design, anime cringe and an ugly redesigned DK pulling retarded faces desperately trying to appeal to the lowest IQ troglodytes of the world.

that's what the third worlders who watch his videos and can't afford videogames want to hear

I know nintendo want the tiktok audience but what is even the appeal if there is no story or gameplay?

>>716444473 (OP)
it's his literal job

Ayo ain’t this that nigga who got filtered by stage 1 of Gradius

>>716444793
>ha ha, so glad I didn't buy a switch! Get a load of these retards bing-bing wahooing
this is my opinion, unironically

>>716444570
this is the right answer
a broken clock is right twice a day
but otherwise this dude is just a burned out husk who exists to make ragebait and fap to futa

>>716444473 (OP)
The chud man is a Blue Archive fan now.

>noooooo we need eugenics because I saw a mediocre 2000s stoner comedy
Has any fictional movie done more psychic damage to society than Idiocracy?

Meanwhile I'm playing DK64 with the tag anywhere mod, and it's been the most satisfying 3D platformer I've played in years. That should just get a remake instead lol.

>>716444473 (OP)
lmao he went full retard

>>716444473 (OP)
>grown man reviewing game designed for children
>mad that it's not difficult
How is he not embarrassed by his own stupidity on a daily basis?

Pretty much every bit of gameplay I've seen of this game is just punching holes in walls until you find a banana
That can't be everything can it?

>>716445068
Waiting

>>716445070
DK64 is not a platformer you dumb faggot. It's an action adventure game

>>716444473 (OP)
his whole brand is just shitting on everything except the safe approved /v/shit, how have you nto eralized this yet

Translation:
>I got filtered by the ostrich hotel and I'm too embarrassed to cope with my non-existant vidya skills

>>716444473 (OP)
https://baraag.net/@SpectralPen/114873054147366946

>>716445136
When you put it like that, it sounds kino

This guy thinks he's smarter than he is

>>716444473 (OP)
Why can’t AAA games for 4 year olds exist?

>>716445136
So you've see, what? 3 webms on /v/?

>>716444473 (OP)
So he's a self admitted fetus?

Didn't this dude get caught gooning with a giant dildo in his mouth?

Isn't that thing a literal actual grifting kike

>>716444473 (OP)
didnt watch but hes right

>>716444473 (OP)
I thought that was the premise

>>716444659
/v/-aligned youtubers used to make gold like this.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KkKDs02AyUQ

>>716445097
DK tropical freeze and Crash bandicoot were "designed for children" by your retarded nigger standards.
Your opinion is invalid.
just because something doesn't have an M rating doesn't mean it's immune from criticism and is fine to be brainrot slop for babies.

>>716444473 (OP)
gigaased and factpill

I clicked and he had 6 hearts before the junction and then complained about people selecting baby win mode options…

He was right about moviegame slop and blatant propaganda in AAA games but now he seems to hate even actual games that come out. Bananza has none of the shit you see in western AAA and he still hates it.

>>716445242
They made the yoshi games the toddler's series (which is a shame because the first yoshi island is great) then mario and now DK. Seems like astrobot is actually winning the 3D platformer audience.

The fact that this fag is taken seriously here is proof that this board is full of mentally ill toddlers.

>you cannot hate games for toddlers!
Why are tendos like this?

>>716444473 (OP)
You should watch good /v/-approved youtubers instead of that twitter addict.

>>716444713
>all slop arguments

>>716444857
>but otherwise this dude is just a burned out husk who exists to make ragebait and fap to futa
So your typical /v/irgin?

>>716445070
I really want to know how anyone could convince themselves DK64 is good instead of fucking annoying but charming.

>>716444473 (OP)
he is just a jaded faggot who cant admit he doesn't like gaming anymore, so he blames his inability to have fun on games supposedly being bad.

while we're at e-celebs thread, where the fuck is Sseth?

>>716445136
none of the terrain has any special effects until after like the ostrich layer i think and then from that point on all of the layers focus around one central gimmick

>>716444473 (OP)
he was good for a while but now he's just figured out how to farm engagement and his content has turned to slop and should be ignored

Imagine having zero joy in your life.

>>716445821
well yeah its full of mentally ill toddlers just look at all the dk bananza praise on this board

>>716444857
I don't believe he likes futa, smells like controlled opposition.

>>716445656
i refused to upgrade my HP and i died like six times on the final boss because of accidentally standing on microscopic bits of the banana mush stuff

>>716445068
>we need eugenics
Yeah we do. Unfortunately it's a complete pipe dream. It's too much of a controversial topic now because germans had to fuck one more thing up for everyone else. Now it's irredeemably tied to racial purity in the collective conscious, so it's never coming back

>>716444473 (OP)
>a game made for fetuses
Bosses might die fairly quickly. But so do you.
Enemies and bosses actually deal a lot of damage in this game. It's easily more difficult than DK64 or like all the 3D Mario games.

But Bananza is the game that's made for fetuses?
I get that you can criticise those other games for their difficulty too but if they're easier, what does that make them?


He is clearly just shitting on the new thing to drive traffic.

>>716446224
His content was always slop. You can tell how this board has degenerated when they even entertain the idea that his videos are decent compared to the kinda stuff people on here used to watch 15 ~ 10 years ago.

>>716445734
Games can only have one criticism?

>>716445919
No, watch razorfist

his brother is better

>>716446295
Final Void and Rool are pretty tough compared to the other bosses. I no hit void but still, it’s a good boss.
Post-game boss rush is up there too but mostly just bluster before you use glare.

Am I supposed to know who he is?

>>716446356
He’s a groomer and cringe.

>>716446271
He got doxed and people found out he donates to a furry femboy game Patreon as well as a fat fetish game one

>>716446407
Am I supposed to know who she is?

>>716446351
>Thing I didn’t say?

These posts should be an instant permaban.

>>716446231
I don't have to imagine

>>716444473 (OP)
Why do these adult men get angry when they predictably don't like video games aimed at children? What did they expect?

>>716446309
I wonder if he even played the the rehearsals.

>>716444473 (OP)
I remember i clicked on a random video of him once and the first thing i heard was something some pol stream of consciousness where half the words where slurs and the other half was meme words like basedcattle.

>>716446307
No one who uses this site would want to be kept by whoever would be capable of it.

Post it

>>716446589
yeah, he does sound like a parody of a Chud

>>716444523
retards believe kids have outgrown Nintendo and only play shit like Minecraft and Fortnite, it's a rehash of them thinking kids only played CoD. Therefore, Nintendo should only cater to hardcore manchildren

>>716444857
I thought he was a conservative nofap type

>>716445136
>That can't be everything can it?
It is. Nintendo fans will give them money just for existing.

>>716446480
That is ina, you may have heard of a death stranding 2 character called pekora, ina is her co-worker

>>716446657
Kids play roblox and ipad shit now, dude. They don't care about console games, it's all mobile shit now.

>>716444473 (OP)
unsubbed. he really is just a bitter cunt now

>>716446309
>>716446538
I skimmed it and in the Rool fight, he ate 2 canisters. He actually upgraded that.

>>716445559
>DK tropical freeze and Crash bandicoot were "designed for children"
Yes? Both of those games are designed and marketed too children, the only adults who play them are manchildren and parents playing with their kids.

>>716444473 (OP)
I certainly dont care for what gaslight dildo-sucking faggots have to say

>>716446309
It’s not more difficult than dk64

>pull up the video
>watch for 5 minutes
>he's still yapping shit like "nintendo has fallen" and i still have no idea what's wrong with DKB

>>716446836
>the only adults who play them are manchildren and parents playing with their kids

Source?

>>716446590
That's why eugenics would actually function as a sort of "squid game" if you will. Pure game of chance and luck for the fun of it.

Women are already breeding for chads btw so some form of eugenics is going on. Just not what 4chuds prefer.

>>716446792
Nintendo is the only one making games for kids, and kids still do in fact buy them. It's part of the reason they have things like theme parks and toys, to attract children asking their parents for it

>>716444473 (OP)
no, no... he's got a point on this one

>>716446863
Hardest part of 64 were the mini-games (including arcade dk) and the super long K. Rool boxing match. The actual platforming and exploring wasn’t that hard.

>>716446923
it's dull, and piss easy. too easy for even children so the tendie "it is for kids!" thing is retarded. NES games were for kids, they weren't retard proof.

>>716446817
>he ate 2 canisters. He actually upgraded that.
Then surely he fully aware and is just deliberately lying for clicks then?
Or are the other games just less than fetuses then?

>>716444473 (OP)
Shitting on anything Nintendo is the current youtube algorithm content pipeline.

bananza is a masterpiece

>>716446667
If anyone says that they're a conservative noFap/trad type, they're either LARPing and are privately a typical male that jerks off and thinks about sex a lot at best or outright grifting you.

I hate what Nintendo has become and will not support them as a company but from the videos I've seen, the game looks like a pretty fun collectathon.

>>716446863
DK64 was not difficult at all, it was tedious and overly time consuming by making you play each level 5 times with each Kong.

>>716444473 (OP)
Josh won

>>716447020
NES games make Elden Ring nut huggers weep like babies, fuckin lel

>>716444473 (OP)
>So he just literally hates everything now, huh?
He's a typical /v/ poster?

>>716446958
roblox won
nintendo is for millenials like you unc

>>716447020
well like he says odyssey was the exact same shit, what's the big deal now

>>716447126
In my experience those people tend to be the ones who are the most obsessed with porn and sex.

Why does /v/ larp that they’re any better-looking or less miserable than Synth?

>>716444473 (OP)
Who?

>>716447075
/thread
These faggot youtubers don't care about anything, it's just to shit on the current thing or jump on the algorithm bandwagon to get views so they won't have to get a real job.

>>716446478
Pussy buzzword

>>716445068
Falling down and the Patterson Batman.

>>716447291
At least I don't broadcast my misery to the entire world.

>>716444473 (OP)
>Someone doesn't like something
>WELL THEY JUST HATE EVERYTHING!
You conceded
You lost
Go back to the alien website

>>716444473 (OP)
Why does /v/ pay attention to this retard? Just because he's a chud like us? Just because he's a chud doesn't mean he's also intelligent. This guy is a genuine midwit

>>716446480
I'm not the one making a vague thread about some nobody

It's a collectathon not a platformer or combat game lol

>>716447360
nigger

>>716447452
>vague

You don’t know what that word means. You tried using it in a sentence and failed.

>>716447376
>Why does /v/ pay attention to retards

>>716444473 (OP)
>Finally!

>>716447020
My kid is 5y old and it’s not too easy for him
What age are your kids?

>>716444473 (OP)
>eceleb trash
kill yourself

>>716447242
roblox is for poor kids whose parents wont spend money on them
90% of roblox players are in countries like India and the Philippines

I love how Nintendo has been making piss easy games for their entire existence following the NES era and just recently this has apparently become a huge issue. Their target audience is kids ages 5-10, stop complaining that these games designed for toddlers aren't hard enough for you.

>>716447265
Yeah pretty much

>>716445205
Post the edit where hogan is outside and the dog is inside

>>716444473 (OP)
i have no intention of watching his video, but there is literally nothing wrong with wanting a simple game where you punch rocks and collect banan

>>716447616
DKC Returns and Tropical Freeze had challenge tho

>literal bottom-of-barrel actual dogshit sold wholesale premium price 70$
>HURR ME WANT BANANA

>everyone stood and clapped

>>716447669
Those are platformers not collectathons

Imagine playing video games

>>716447669
DK64 was an easy game. 3d collectathons have always being on the easy side. the hardest one is probably banjo tooie

>>716444713
Wait till this guy sees SM64... You beat platforming bosses with just jumping and punching.

>>716447554
Funniest part about this image is that once we got rid of that people generally decided to stop having kids because of the economy/women got extremely radicalized so birth rates are trending down

>>716444473 (OP)
he always did, it makes him looks smart and infaliable to insecure people like most of /v/

>>716446407
Oh yeah? Pronounce her name. Not her nickname. Bet you can't do it faggot

>>716444713
Very sloppy post

>>716444473 (OP)
>Synthetic Man
I don't know who that is.

Cope. DK won. Nintendo won. Bing bing wahoo enjoyers won.

>name is synthetic man
>he's a normal human

>>716447828
Wow, it's almost like people aren't getting kids because the current economic climate makes it impossible for a working class family to raise children and not because people actually don't want kids.

>>716444473 (OP)
Is this the fag that has a video of him deepthroating dildos?

>>716447954
How is it impossible? I see parents with kids all the time. Touch grass you stupid faggot.

>>716447954
It's a mix of both, actually. The US is becoming South Korea in terms of gender dynamics and that definitely matters.

>>716448031
When my parents where children you could get a job out of high school and be able to afford a home at 25 while raising a family with one working parent. That's not possible today unless you're born into money.

>>716447828
It has nothing to do with the economy. Birth rates have been stable since 1972. Its around when hormonal birth control took off.

This guy is a living caricature of modern /v/

>>716444473 (OP)
>random youtuber I never heard of #1038312 says thing
oh no

>>716446667
Literally does not exist, stop perpetuating lies because they make you feel based or tradpilled or whatever the fuck
These retards regularly get caught talking to fags, gooning to hentai, fucking dudes, how many times does it have to happen THESE PEOPLE ARE BORN LIARS, THEY LIE TO YOU, THEY WANT TO CONTROL YOU

>>716447954
This is dead wrong. The only people having kids these days are the poor.

>>716448010
synthetic man wishes he looked like that. he's a flabby balding manlet. the faggot sucking a dildo looked muscular

>>716448109
>when muh parents
stopped reading there get a job

>>716448228
Wrong!
https://www.bloomberg.com/opinion/articles/2024-03-12/the-rich-are-starting-to-have-more-babies-than-the-poor-again

>says it's too easy
>and yet he kept dying
So it's not too easy then? Or does it have to be an unsurmountable wall that you question whether or not you can overcome it at all in order to not count as easy?
If it's as easy as he claims, why couldn't he do it without dying?

>>716447954
People don't want kids. It's that simple. The world is rife with juicy distractions and a kid is an obligation. It's simply more fun and entertaining to blow your 30s on partying, drugs, video games, whatever, than it is to settle down and have 3 kids before you are 30.

>>716448158
See >>716448092. Zoomer men are more conservative than their grandparents and zoomer women are the most liberal people in the last century. Even given your rates, women would still have one or two kids. Now they don't because they see men as their ideological enemies

>>716446407
I don't know who he is and YouTube just recommended his video to me, I just dismissed it as a ragebait for clicks but he seems to be known here it seems

>>716447767
Unironically is there more skill involved in beating this guy or Grumpy Kong? I want to know /v/'s take

>>716448270
oh idk, I thought I saw on /v/ someone saying that was him. I guess they were just insulting him

>>716448317
How do you explain this?

>>716444473 (OP)
>says it's an easy game
sure however i watched one of his streams and he kept dying like a faggot.

>>716447828
delusional retard

>>716448341
He invested into increasing his stock of juice which revives you to max when you die. It’s like playing OoT with 4 fairies at all times.

>>716444473 (OP)
Synthetic man is always right

>>716444523
kids arent playing on consoles anymore. its time to face reality

>>716448460
Even in the third world births are trending downwards slowly too anon-kun. They're starting to hit the point the west hit decades ago.
https://www.mercatornet.com/to_the_surprise_of_demographers_african_fertility_is_falling

>>716448432
King Bob-Omb because most people have been thrown off the mountain at least once.

>>716444473 (OP)
Video games, faggot, VIDEO GAMES!

>>716444473 (OP)
Any interest I might have in Ninty's new shit immediately goes out the window when I see this disgusting, minimalistic slop UI, or really, a lack thereof. Zero personality whatsoever. It's unfortunately been like this for 99% of Ninty's first party shit since the first Switch. At best you get some slight font differences, like in this game, that's it.
Corporatized as fuck, uncanny in cleanliness and form. It's the UI version of a fucking mental ward. Just like how all modern websites are minimalistic too, with very simple shapes and no flare.
Everything be as sterile as possible.

>>716448491
Dying in Nintendo games doesn't count because you die to "Mario brain". i.e. that complacent state of mind you get in because the game is brain dead easy so you only quarter pay attention which ironically makes you die more. It's not actually hard you just die because it's so easy you don't care about trying

you are brown

>>716448432
I'd say king bob-omb but not by much. He's more tedious than difficult

>>716448586
Yeah, and the panic over "muh overpopulation" aged like milk. Turns out when people aren't scrambling to survive and start having access to education, birth rates nosedive almost universally. Industrialized society is basically population control autopilot. It's not a fluke, it's a feature.

>>716448615
It conveys the information it needs to.

The world is already wild and colorful enough.

>>716444473 (OP)
Why does nu-/v/ watch the most garbage youtubers around nowadays?

>>716444473 (OP)
HOW DARE HE CRITICIZE MY PRECIOUS NINTENDO! I SPENT $580 TO PLAY THIS BABY GAME! IT HAS LOLI FEET SO IT'S GOOD!

>>716444473 (OP)
TO. GET. CLICKS. Why are you knuckle dragging retards so immune to understanding a simple grift when it’s right in front of you?

>>716448615
no one actually cares about shit like this you have autism lol

>>716444473 (OP)
You didn't say he was wrong.
Here's the video you're advertising:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0__Ph3jk5WQ

Btw didn't he do something /v/ didn't like? I forget what it was.

>>716448874
He rage quit Gradius at the volcano in the first world then called it shit.

misanthropy is bad /v/, dont fall into the pit like this idiot

>>716444473 (OP)
apparently he dislikes odyssey for some reason so it makes sense he'd dislike this.

>>716448650
But we both know he would die even if he locked in and tried his best.

>>716448615
A recurring complaint on /v/ has always been cluttered UIs in modern games, there's a million memes about it, and your faggot ass is now claiming it's bad when UI is minimalistic? Fuck off you stupid bitch.