Thread 717309459

Jon Blow has taken the Switchpill and will be porting his upcoming Sokoban game to Switch 2. The Witness will most likely be ported at some point too. Are you ready to enjoy the complete Blowkino collection, Switch2bros?

But sir, saheeb, I am very good engineer, sir.

>>717309459 (OP)
Lol why does he sound so upset

inb4 solja boy
inb5 phillip fish

>>717309459 (OP)
Boy he sure blew the dog whistle there huh?

>>717309459 (OP)
Jon Blows.

>>717310426
K I N O

>>717310108
He's tired of getting emailed by jeets
I don't blame him

Is this why the algo has dug out that one dorkly and soujaboy video?
>>717310830
Dick

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xSXofLK5hFQ
He was GAPED by Soljaboy

>>717310108
He's always upset and butthurt.

>>717309459 (OP)
>but I am a very good engineer Sir
>Sir
lmao, He knows what he is doing

>>717310426
THIS GAME STUPID AS HELL MANE

>>717309459 (OP)
>Experienced game programmers only
>Must have 10 years of experience with Unreal 5
>Must have 3 years of Nintendo Switch 2 programming experience
>Must be well versed in Python, C#, terraform, CI/CD pipelines and Gradle
>Must be capable of wearing many hats
>Salary - $50k a year + Dental

>Sir
kek he wants the jeets to stop destroying his inbox

>>717310426
>>717310884
>>717311223
Every time I see this image I can't help but imagine Blow listening to this in the dark room all alone:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ribbpLMgtO0
It's fucking stupid but always gets a chuckle out of me.

>>717310108
His inbox is approaching 700 PPM (Pajeets Per Minute)

>>717309459 (OP)
>three years driving rickshaw
>over one hundred rapes
>no need for bathroom breaks
DON'T HIRE ME SIR!
Act like a fool, think like a brilliant

>>717311310
You joke but this game is built with a custom engine written in an entirely new language. This is a brand new task no one has experience in.

>>717309459 (OP)
What and who?

>>717309459 (OP)
What and who?

Is this the Fez dev?

>>717311949
>>717311945
see >>717311132

>>717311952
That's Fish's, this is Blow's.

>>717311952
Braid and The Witness

>>717312174
He shouldn't ask so much when all he has made has been super contrived 1 gimmick puzzle games. I think what he really wants is someone to make the game for him while he is shooting up in his office shitting himself while trying to arc his piss stream up and black on himself without using his hands.

Im gonna spam him with fake resumes just to spite this nigga

>>717312619
witness was not a 1 gimmick puzzle game. It had at least a dozen gimmicks

>>717310108
Jeets, replace the sir with saar in your mind and it makes since

>>717311150
No, that's you.

>>717313545
Jonathan Blow posts in here?

Jonathan can blow me

>>717311952
It was alleged the fez dev didn't even make the game it was his partner who made it. That's why when they split, he used the excuse of online harassment to be the reason for no Fez 2

>>717310108
He has a short fuse and gets irritated easily, he was already pre-seething.

unc, who's jon blow?

>>717310108
He's old and has no family.

>>717312619
Nah, Blow already has his company that works in creating the game and new language. Nothing really extraordinary in adding one more contractor.

Sir please to be porting to Switch 2. For very good looks I get it done quickly.

Didn't this guy tweet a few years back saying how unfair it is that people new at a field aren't given a chance?

>>717322461
That doesn't sound like Blow.

>>717309459 (OP)
Didn't he get assblasted when Soulja Boy was goofing on Braid?

>>717311310
its worse, he specifically says contractor, that means no benefits and can be pay-on-delivery or any sort of fuckery, there is no salary

>>717312174
oh really?
damn both of those games sucked ass

>>717318575
yeah anon not everyone plays 20+ year old side scrollers with shit art and some weird puzzle game...
i think its less a "zoomer" thing and more a "i wont accept im getting old" thing

>>717309459 (OP)
I’ll say it: I like Jon Blow. Braid didn’t age well but The Witness is a masterpiece and I’m eager to play his next game.

>>717309459 (OP)
lol shoulda used unity or unreal and be able to instantly build for every damn platform out there

>>717312669
make them look legit and really appealing and setup a bunch of fake linked in profiles, githubs, or webpages where he can checkout your work and when he clicks on them he sees a bunch of pics of souljaboy plastered all over the place

>>717322461
Don't think that ever happened. Jon Blow has been working autistically in his own projects for decades.

>>717310108
You have to understand that jeets are extremely dishonest and scammy by nature. They will cling to any remotely popular project so they can edit a character a file and then claim in the CV that they did the whole thing by themselves, then they leverage this trick to help gain access to a comfy position in whatever american tech company. Most of them have a jeet hive inside and they will always cover for their own, even with the petty nepo drama going on.

Even if Blow is a literally who, he probably receives hundreds of requests from indians on a daily basis. For comparison, the mentally retarded pajejeet who accidentally notified 400k people on epic's github was also insisting on having a meme request approved so he could do exactly the same. Whites are incredibly naive, so this method works.

>>717310426
Reminder that this scene has nothing to do with Soulja Boy or his comments, and they are only "related" by editing.

>>717310108
He's just being real.

>>717310426
completely kino.

>>717311728
>custom engine written in an entirely new language
QRD? I'm more interested in the language.

>>717328304
Blow got fed up with other languages not being made for videogame optimization and development so he started developing a new language (unofficially called jai). If you google "blow jai" or something you will find talks where he explains his reasoning and motivations in autistic detail.

i am asking everyone to not buy his next game because it would be incredibly funny if he was financially ruined and killed himself

>i am a very good engineer sir
He hates indians

>>717323125
based

>>717310997
Fair, I'd also be annoyed to hell and back if I had to wade through hundreds of pajeet applications

>>717327085
Manlets just can't get a break.

blow can blow me, witness pissed me off with its puzzle undo shit when you fail

it'd be much smarter to port it to switch 1 desu, much bigger install base and switch 2 owners also get to play it

>>717310108
Imagine being at the top of the world and then tumbling all the way fuck down, surrounded by laughter. You would be at least mildly upset too.

>>717332334
He peaked way after Braid with the witness though.

>>717331956
>when you fail
Slow down and calculate, spaz.

>>717332879
i do, if i spend 10 minutes trying to solve a puzzle, get to the next one then fail, i don't want to have to redo the last one. it's a waste of my time

>>717318575
>>717322821
Honestly, I can't even blame zoomers for not knowing Jon Blow since the indie devs for the first indie boom of the late 2000s/early 2010s really should be forgotten for the most part.

The only indie platformer games from that period that are actually good are Shovel Knight and VVVVVV

>>717325379
lmao, saved.

>>717309459 (OP)
Still not forgetting that he was the one who forced the cancerous ludonarrative dissonance buzzword

>>717309459 (OP)
>he's even seething while writing a job posting
Who hurt this guy?

>>717336394
An army of unqualified Indians.

>>717336937
Bullshit, he was never forced to work with them

>>717337151
That doesn’t mean his inbox wasn’t flooded with worthless applications that made it near impossible to find someone actually qualified via public means.

>>717312619
wasnt he creating some new language that was supposed to be better than c++ in every way?

>>717325379
>the mentally retarded pajejeet who accidentally notified 400k people on epic's github was also insisting on having a meme request approved so he could do exactly the same.
It was not the jeet's fault though, it was epic's faggotry. They were using github to run a quasi sekrit club that required hundreds of thousands of people to join, which it isn't what it's intended for.
If you have a setup where a single jeet can send an email to 400k people (which you KNOW they will try), you're doing something wrong.

>guy named Blow makes a game culled Suckupon
Pure artistry at work.

>>717338506
Making something idiot proof doesn't make the tester not an idiot.

>>717339143
The jeet was an absolute idiot, but not the biggest idiot in the story.

>>717309459 (OP)
>YOU HAVE TO HAVE SHIPPED GAMES
But the gaming sphere is different now, no one is gonna recruit some no namers in big companies like they did Blow

>>717339417
But he's the funniest idiot.

>>717338362
He never said that, drama dork.

>>717309459 (OP)
It will be the switch 4 by the time he's done.

>>717309459 (OP)
This literal cocksucking faggot is always criticizing Nintendo. They should tell him to fuck off and shove his pretentious meme game up his loose asshole.

>>717309973
Ain’t no point to the game.

>>717309459 (OP)
This means that his game engine will support vulkan when it comes out (soon(tm))

>>717332334
Watch the indie game documentary. He was upset even at the height of Braid's popularity. The man is an angry artsy faggot who won't be satisfied until he is given the Nobel prize for literature for one of his games.

>>717328304
He made his own language for system programming/game programming. It's focused on having metaprogramming capabilities (so it can be extended with new features) and being extremely fast to compile. He can compile the entire engine+game in 2 seconds from scratch, which is impressive. Anyone making vydia knows that compiling times in the engine language is slow af.

The reality tho is that no one established is moving from C++. So if we ever gonna get anything vydia related with this, it'll be in 10 years or so.

>>717328730
>>717332334
BASED Blow has already responded to your KEK attitude
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RY0WclQU7x4

>>717309459 (OP)
>I am a very good engineer sir

>>717309459 (OP)
I wonder if he copy-pasted that from an actual email he got from some ESL.

>>717309459 (OP)
> sir

lol

>>717343234
man he's gonna be disappointed, who even wants to play 5000000 sokoban puzzles? will it change gaming forever like he thinks? I doubt it

>>717327085
How much pork is too much?

He needs to realize that games aren’t art nor do they need to be.

>>717309973
Mario... from the future!

>>717328737
All programmers do.

>>717333967
It only makes you redo puzzles on the very first baby tutorial levels that are so small (like 2x2) it would otherwise be easy to brute force
Your telling me you spent 10 minutes on each of these levels?

>>717309459 (OP)
His anti-bharatic remarks will NOT stand

I think you guys are wrong that this is about the Sokoban game. That one was for testing his programming language/engine, he's making a bigger game on the side IIRC

>>717350876
It's the other way around, Sokoban is his biggest project ever but he has some smaller sideprojects.

>>717351129
>Jon: The Sokoban game is very huge. It is probably the biggest, like, if we’re going to say handcrafted, high-quality puzzle game, if that’s a category, this is easily the biggest one of those ever made by some integer factor. So the game has… we’re actually going through editing and cutting out levels right now because there’s too many, and you want to keep the best ones. It’s a level-based game where you wander around an overworld and then go into specific levels.
wow, you're right, what a retard

>>717351195
that said I checked, and this is "game 4" while "game 3" has been in development for 10 years. it just seems like the sokoban game became bigger in the interim

>>717350757
it was on a platform just next to one of the lasers (had seen it on a video) and you had to do a puzzle that corresponded to a mirrored one at the opposite side, very difficult

>>717333967
You are supposed to think really hard first and input the solution only if you get it.

>>717355436
i don't have the working memory to think up the entire solution before doing it

this is something out of a comedy skit
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4yh9LsvL5IE

>>717356805
meant to post this one but both are good lol
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8UGO3EG5DC8

>>717310426
im trying to figure out where his apartment must be in san francisco from the view outside his window and really coming up empty. my vibe is that the window is facing east rather than north cuz i see oakland across the water and various cranes for unloading ship cargo. anyone want to help me snoop here? feeling like it's the mission district area.

>>717309459 (OP)
>Sir
you know he has jeet fatigue

>>717356805
>>717356882
Heh. Gaming keyboards are so fucking stupid.

atheists BTFO
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E49H-hm5j80

>>717359478
He is slowly evolving into Terry A. Davis

>>717342115
if he makes the engine open source or licenses it out with a competitive model (competitive with Unreal and Unity) we may well see mass adoption of Jai in our lifetimes, no hyperbole. I think it's unlikely he makes anything open source because he's not a fan of that. but the licensing thing I could see happen. you know his engine is gonna have great profiling tools and quality of life features in general. the only caveat would be that he likes to rely on text command line stuff instead of a full GUI so it remains to be seen if his engine has a "full UI".

I love this man so much

>>717363545
Man it's funny how things change. I guess if you keep getting shit on for having certain opinions, you eventually shift to having different opinions to reclaim your sense of self.

>>717340834
based gundam king

he ain't never run out of the going back in time potion

>>717363819
are you implying Blow was ever a leftshit?

>>717364097
I assume he was after seeing his mario clone

>>717327085
Where the hell is the short thing from?

>>717364303
Braid isn't even a mario clone you mongoloid, he makes puzzle games

>>717364303
Not only it isn't a Mario clone but I don't get how you are getting anything leftist from Braid.

>>717356332
Don't have to do that either. And you can always help yourself with some pen and paper.

>>717328534
>If you google "blow jai" or something you will find talks where he explains his reasoning and motivations in autistic detail.
This is correct, but it sounds like you're trying to get someone to look up lemonparty.

>>717368716
too much work. i had fun up until that point but that lost me, and i refunded

>>717357538
they probably invited jon to one of the offices for the film company dude

>>717357538
This is obviously a stupid and pointless thing to do. Unfortunately, I felt compelled to give it a try anyway, just as a little challenge.
I think I got the approximate area.

>>717371742
he is way higher up. the building must be tall so shouldn't be too hard to find.

Whats sokoban

>>717371851
Block pushing game.

>>717371812
You can continue the search yourself.

>>717332151
less games on the switch 2, more users actively looking for new games means less compitition on the store page. switch 2 only at launch makes sense.