Thread 718838405

>the current Halo Lore is that some Monkey with a big stick somehow managed to defeat girlboss Cortana and her army of Halo Forerunner robots. After his Homeworld was destroyed btw.
Who the fuck writes this shit?

mm monke

>>718838405 (OP)
what ps2 game is this

I skipped every cutscene so I don't know anything about Halo Infinite story wise other than there is a big monke who hates the green man

>>718838405 (OP)
>current Halo Lore
Is probably getting flushed down the toilet

>>718838405 (OP)
The consequences of Homeworld 3 were disastrous for the industry

>>718838405 (OP)
>the current /vg/ Lore is that some Monkey with a big shitposting folder somehow managed to defeat girlboss /bfg/ and her army of /Codg/ robots. After his Halo general was destroyed btw.
Who the fuck writes this shit?

>>718838405 (OP)
why does CHADscharum's head come to a point like that

>>718838943
That’s hilarious at least infinite was good for something

>>718838405 (OP)
this face closeup was genuinely the only thing that made me somewhat hopeful for more halo kino

>>718838648
kidding aside, that outdated technical quality to him was what made it comfy looking and feel halo to me

ended up never playing it
did it even have co-op?
i refuse to play gaylo that isn't co-op campaign on legendary with my brother

>>718838405 (OP)
WE

>>718838405 (OP)
John halo managed to defeat a godlike zombie virus after Africa got nuked.
The problem isn't that it happened the problem is it happened off screen.

>>718838943
Lmao what the fuck is this
Are /vg/ inhabitants even human? This doesn't look like something humans ever do. This is some Lovecraftian insanity.

>>718838405 (OP)
Halo lore is so retarded how come the Forrunners only solution to defeating the flood was killing themselves, but somehow two far less advanced civilizations, millions of years later managed to defeat the flood and still managed to survive mostly intact.

>>718841601
It was giga retarded but it was funny as hell

>>718841601
you are unfamiliar with 4chan's more infamous incidents interacting with normies, aren't you?
we got a bunch of fucked up people lurking around that have folders full of fucked up shit who will happily accept an excuse to go apeshit.
a bunch of them hang out on /b/

>>718841747
>normies
You have to go back

>>718838405 (OP)
That does actually sound fun. Some PMS AI bitch has a spergout? Fuck that, return to monke. Of course, I'm sure it's not actually fun, but still.

>>718841601
>>718841747
hell I remember on /v/ once some stupid kid started trying to talk big after we got into an autism slap fight and he "threatened" to start posting gore.

>>718841802
yeah yeah it was normalfag.

anyways so I start heckling this kid and start making requests for chinks electrocuting themselves off of old liveleak and he just shuts the fuck up almost immediately like he wasn't expecting people to ACTUALLY be fine with a bit of gore.

>>718841885
John Halo never fights the monkey, Instead the final boss is a diffrent girlboss

>>718838405 (OP)
>some Monkey with a big stick somehow managed to defeat girlboss Cortana and her army of Halo Forerunner robots
But Master Chief is just some monkey that beat a lovecraftian parasite gigamind and an alien megachurch cult that was using Forerunner tech, all with just a 5.56 rifle and while driving a Toyota technical with tusks

>>718838405 (OP)
Irl too

>>718838405 (OP)
It was unironically the only good writing decision 343 ever made. Higher up execs forced them to scrap the dogshit Halo 4/Halo 5 storyline and start over, but 343 writers somehow had too much of an ego to just do a hard reboot starting over where Halo 3 ended. This was the compromise.

>>718838405 (OP)
>after Cortana basically turned into a fucking god and enslaved the whole galaxy overnight
>Monke man somehow then cripples godess-Cortana and her galaxy-sized army of super-robots
>Cortana is then apparently obliterated by a brand new AI
>Monke man also makes a fleet of infinity+ sized warships, again this takes place in like a week or so
WHO WROTE THIS TRASH?

>>718838405 (OP)
>>the current Halo Lore is that some Monkey with a big stick somehow managed to defeat
as opposed to master chief resolving everything? a hairless monkey with random guns doing everything?

>>718841928
You fight a big monkey as part of the final boss fight. 343 are monkeys so they don't program him right and he rubberbands to you at mach speed across the arena.

>>718838405 (OP)
Humans are also simian creatures who somehow defeated the covenant the flood and the didact

>>718843110
>defeated the covenant
the brutes doomed the covenant by betraying the elites
>the flood
The flood was killed with forerunner weapons on the ark and the activated halo rings

>the didact
Cortana killed him by invading his life support suit and making his heart explode in his chest

>>718841912
reminds me of that tumblr image that used to float around where the girl threatened to spam 4chan with gore lol newfags are so fucking retarded
i miss accelspammer and gorespammer and retroactively any actual nuisance from the 2000s who would make newfags shriek with terror nowadays

>>718843625
I am still kind of salty that I was offered gore and the little faggot wouldn't post any.

>>718841716
Qrd on the whole anomalocaris posting? I stopped giving a fuck about Halo after 4.

>>718844402
The endless

>>718841684
>Those who built this place knew what they wrought.
They understood the terror and full potential of the flood and took the immediate emergency shutdown path. Covies and humies are a lot less willing to throw in the towel and a lot less aware about why they maybe should've. It's more about ignorance and will than advanced societies or weapons.

>>718838405 (OP)
>monke
The resemblance is uncanny

>>718838405 (OP)
Literally who gives a fuck about Girlboss Cortana and her army of Forerunner bots? Fuck that lore. Flushing it down the toilet with a soft reboot is exactly what /v/ asked for.

>>718841684
>and still managed to survive mostly intact.
for now.
the forerunners had to deal with a much larger outbreak that got to the point where it was basically willing itself into existence through supreme bullshittery.

>>718838943
actually we won, we're talking about our game while you guys just loaf around depressed because Halo ain't just dead. It's fucking BURIED
>>/vg/536219601

>>718838405 (OP)
the women in charge at 343 will just retcon it in the next game like trying to decide what they want to eat for dinner

>>718848497
Nice one retardo

why does cortana get less hot each game and her face specifcally more retarded

>>718849407
>wants an epic gotcha from mistyping one >
>intentionally adds a letter to a word
embarrassing

>>718849497
You were defeated. Broken. SCATTERED. By me.

>>718848595
>Implying /v/ didn't spend the entirety of the 2010s begging them to retcon it
Let me guess: you played Halo 4 back when you were 10 and are mad your precious childhood memories got thrown out in the story?

>>718849534
I unironically liked Escharum. He was goofy and his chuuni was fun. I do unironically like the whole "chuuni space ROMA LARPers" aesthetic the Banished have. Its entertaining and makes them feel so much more different from the grin Space Catholic covenant.

I had blissfully forgotten the Cortana rampancy plot for years, fuck your for reminding me that exists.

>>718849492
appealing to the audiencia moderna

>>718838405 (OP)
It's even worse, he managed to hold back the flood as well.
Halo has been a joke since 342 took control, since they retconned humans being the forerunners, they couldn't even release the remasters/Master Chief collection without injecting their awful stench that comes with their ugly aesthetic of the updated Halo CE and 2.
I hate 343 so much it's unreal, but I don't think Bungie could have managed to make anymore good games either judging by Destiny and Destiny 2, so I wish the series would have just come to an end with Reach.

>>718838405 (OP)
That was unironically the only good part of Infinite's story

>>718841935
John Halo is literally Christ our God.

>>718842560
>343 writers somehow had too much of an ego to just do a hard reboot starting over where Halo 3 ended.
I would have actually praised them if Master Chief woke up from Cryo again, if they made Halo 4 and 5 a bad dream for both us and John 117.

How has 343 still not learned the lesson that nobody gives a fuck about their books?

They keep putting extremely important lore in them. I don’t know anyone who actually engages with that shit beyond watching a YouTube recap.

lol what a piece of shit company

>>718848497
The point wasn’t a franchise vs franchise thing but the absurdity of that one dedicated schizo could annihilate an entire general single handedly. There was even a conspiracy theory back in the day that the escharum poster was a moderators since the /codg/tards got banned for reporting him.

>>718838405 (OP)
343 really thought they were cooking with the knockoff marvel villains speech they wrote for him

>>718853637
a and b still make sense though, alpha = male beta = female

>>718853989
How does that make sense to you?
Walk me through your rationale.

>>718853229
>343 really thought they were cooking with the knockoff marvel villains speech they wrote for him
It worked from the hype I saw from people's reactions to it on this board and YouTube when it first dropped.
I hate gamers so much, the only thing stopping us from getting better games is the people currently funding these shitty games.

>>718838405 (OP)
Its called stakes and an antagonist

>>718854282
men are the a ones and woman b

>>718838405 (OP)
The banished are so fucking retarded
Such a donut steel deviantart-tier faction.
>edgy red color scheme
>covenant never got close to defeating them
>brute-led, so original
>obvious retcon, "they always existed you just haven't heard of them before."

>>718838405 (OP)
Halo 5's campaign was so bad it caused them to drop it. Even as Halo Studio, they're never coming back to anything in Halo 5 nor are they even coming back to Halo 4, they may make some reference to Halo 4 here in there though but that's about it.

>>718838405 (OP)
>>718838943
Escharumposting was so fucking stupid that was funny, everytime I see his face I just think "BROKEN"