Thread 719942470

>>719942470 (OP)
Shit, that’s why I would join. Dark side is just more fashionable

>>719942470 (OP)
wouldn't have it in me to kill younglings desu

nor am i /loyal/ coded enough to be a jedi...

>>719942470 (OP)
No, I'd join on principle, that's just a bonus.

>implying I wouldn't steal tie interceptor, modify it, and completely wreck imperial patrols for sport
Nothing personell, Palpy.

>>719942470 (OP)
hate is a good emotion to train with. I just pity people who ignore hatred and instead only focus on the warm compassionate things in life. Not even the Jedi were immune to hatred, they just learned to sublimate it better.

>>719942470 (OP)
Too many orgies. No thanks
But those first few, pheewwwww, lawdy

>>719942470 (OP)
I would be just a regular human not a space wizard so of course i would join the "join or die" faction.

>>719942470 (OP)
What are the down sides to the Galactic Empire? You get jobs, stability, human supremacy, intimidation factor from potential threats like the Vong or Unknown Regions or Hutts.

>>719942470 (OP)
I would join the dark side because I'm related to Machiavelli

MUST I DO EVERYTHING MYSELF?

>>719942470 (OP)
Of course. The Rebellion/New Republic is a bunch limpwristed anti-military faggots.

not gonna lie i've been trying to get into star wars but I think the dichotomy of the light vs dark side is really fucking lame
>dark side wants power and immortality, goes through essentially hell to get it
>light side... also has power without suffering they just do good also they just get to be immortal through force ghosts anyway
like what's the point? so then they're bad to be le bad? clearly anakin isn't le bad or at least wasn't

>>719942470 (OP)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dYE9Ko585UE

depends, are we talking about the andor genuine turbo banality of evil empire or the regular kind of pathetic saturday morning cartoon villains but they blew up a planet once empire

>>719942517
>>719942537
>>719942583
>>719942589
>>719942595
>>719942604
>>719942618
>>719942647
yall dont even smoke weed
theres nothing bad about yall except for your odor

>>719942683
I can hear it

>>719942703
The Sith were the good guys in Episodes 1-3. Just because you're evil doesn't mean you are disorderly. The Jedi were all kinds of insulting, and precocious. They tipped the balance of the force in favor of the Sith forever because they couldn't stop their wild aspirations for power.

>>719942706
You are brown.

>>719942690
I think the point is that the dark side is "easy." You just impulsively do what you want and the consequences aren't necessarily immediately apparent. You're willing to abuse your power to get ahead whenever, Light Side not as much

but yea jedi morality is often a bit head-scratchy and "why is that okay when that isn't"

>>719942470 (OP)
the republic look cooler than the empire.

>>719942618
>What are the down sides to the Galactic Empire?
living in a tyrannical and opressive dictatorship ruled by a evil space wizard from a backwards religion that promotes backstabbing, suffering and hardship? Having the ISB show up at your door if you sneeze in a way the regime doesnt like? Being disappeard in a torture prison? Are you retarded?

>>719942706
I'll smoke your ass under the table, fool

its not the east or the west side

From my perspective the rebels are evil and they also look retarded

>>719943269
I'll smoke harder, i'll drink harder, AND i'll work harder

>>719942470 (OP)
I don't know, the Empire is a corrupt shithole where only the higher-ups on Inner Worlds prosper and that is bad at war despite all the hype, but canonically, New Republic is literally retarded, so it's a difficult choice.

>>719943367
Many are saying this

If you were force sensitive you could probably just take over a small town and lord over it like a god. Dunno why the fuck these space wizard fucks go out of their way to fight each other.

>>719943504
Speak your truth, brother. Now if you'll excuse me, I need to get back to my 9-5.

>>719943506
its called star wars not local magic bully

>>719942470 (OP)
Nah.
I'd find the planet that has all the Twi'lek brothels and just hang out there. Normal (for Star Wars) 9 to 5 job

>>719943367
>introduce the coolest rebel SpecForce armor ever
>it only ever appears in one single Legends story

>>719943504
>>719943550
Clerks settled this argument like 30 years ago

>>719942470 (OP)
I'm literally Anakin

>>719943506
why the fuck would i want to be a small town major. Does being a major and meddling with administration work, roads, kindergardens, green spaces, bike lanes and infrastructure sound fun to you?

>>719943694
Yes

>>719943506
Because force sensitives due to the nature of the force itself can and will find each other. Vader would either kill you or turn you over to Palpatine if you came up and tried this.

>>719943694
some people are such rubes they can only think small

>>719943213
That's been debunked actually.

>>719943805
No, it has not. But please, be my guest, provide source for your claim

>>719942470 (OP)
They're based unlike jedi who promote homosexuality and mix racing

All force users face the wall no exemptions.

>>719943592
Sith'd do that, tho

>>719942470 (OP)
>dark side is evil
No shit Sith are evil. So are Jedi. In fact, Jedi are more evil.

Sith recruit adults. Jedi steal kids from their parents.

>>719943870
in a galaxy far, far away, i would be all about race mixing, anon

>>719943504
>>719943550
I’m surprised there hasn’t been a shitty Disney+ short or series about a worker who was building the Death Star

>>719943838
The empire funded media said that's all false. Do you even watch holotv?

>>719943987
>the side that puts its recruits into murder trials and encourages the eventual murder of all of your fellow students and teachers is GOOD
>the side that provides its recruits with a safe enviroment and high education is BAD
what is your IQ, anon

>>719944003
This picture is non canon as there are no panties in space.

>>719943987
Except Luke who ends up beating THE CHOSEN ONE in a duel

>>719942470 (OP)
No, i'd join the Empire because i'm human and i could get an alien slave babe.

>>719944118
You know, I know, and everybody else knows that it was Jedi Councel who turned Anakin into Darth Vader. Not Palpatine.

>>719944143
>THE CHOSEN ONE
eee ooo eee ooo

>>719944128
based

>>719943694
First off I think you'd have to be able to spell "mayor". Also you can just bang as many women and do whatever you want with several hundred, essentially slaves. I'm not sure what being Vader's bitch boy can give you that can't.

>>719944143
who's the one who kills Palpatine?

>>719944317
This is why you're a rube, you're imagining being vader's bitch boy and not imagining being Vader

>>719943395
>filename
go back

>>719944317
>you need to become a local tyrant to get pussy by forcing your enslaved subjects to have sex with you
HOLY incel moment. Normal people just get a partner the regular way, anon. They dont need some weird rape fantasy.

>uhm actually the jedi are evil too, from a certain point of view :)
stop falling for post modern slop, retards

>>719944404
Being Vader? The guy who is canonically the most powerful force user in existence? The one who you can't surpass because bullshit space eugenics?I mean sure go for it Anon, worked out for everyone else. But even then, I'd rather not have to worry about everyone beneath me waiting to kill me while managing an empire and would rather just fuck around all day.

>>719944424
Anon you're the one that brought rape into it. I just wanted to fuck.

>>719943767
Theyre not stand users, anon.

>>719944404
You sound like every other failed sith apprentice that dies fighting their local master.

>>719944530
>not have to worry about everyone beneath me waiting to kill me
bro if you're Vader you can see the future, the force will warn you each time some punk will try anything

>>719944530
>i just salviated at the tought of banging all the woman i rule over, who would be essentially slaves
>N..no, what do you mean rape, y...you w....w....weirdo!
Anon...

>>719944576
That didn't even help Vader or the Emperor. Force bullshit is no match for really, really long falls. Unless you jump first then you'll be fine.

>>719944617
So all kings are rapists? Anon I don't think you thought this argument through.

>>719944572
I agree. I, however, am different and could easily kill Vader and the Emperor and take their place.

>>719944664
Anon... San...

>>719944664
Kings dont bang all the regular woman they rule over while using them as essentially slaves. In what kind of reality do you exist.

>>719944782
One where women are typically attracted to power and would want to bang the space wizard that lords over them. Anon I think you might be retarded.

>>719942470 (OP)
I would side with the Empire because logically they would win. They only lost due to shit writing.

Seriously the rebels are a bunch of diverse lamers. S o y boys like Luke, Africans like Lando, a shitty empowered cunt like Leia, and tribal teddy bears with spears? Realistically speaking the Empire would have won. They losing is absolute wish fulfillment shit writing.

And before anyone says But The US Lost Vietnam To Primitives. You have to remember the United States is retarded they never fought to truly exterminate the way the Empire fought. And the Empire had TWO fucking Death Stars they only lost because the Bad Writing forced them to lose. Especially because Luke's trump card is to gamble if his father loved him enough to beat the Emperor for him. Pure shit writing. I don't care how you explain all of it. Star Wars was always woke shit.

And a focused united Empire with the best weapons was never going to lose to emasculated s o y boy mongrels who they wanted to kill not conquer.

Why the fuck would you actually want to be the walking respirator known as Vader, he canoncially lives off his own self loathing and his only enjoyment in life is when gets to make other people suffer more than he does.

>>719942470 (OP)
Dark Side
>Cucking yourself since the Rule of 2 always results in betrayal and death.
"""Light""" Side
>Cucking yourself (literally) since you can't insert yourself into any of the very many Twi'leks or Togrutas that shamelessly beg for it.
I choose the middle. No, not "Gray Jedi" bullshit. I mean I use the Force as merely a tool for my own gain and I reserve the right to choose to be good or evil based entirely on my own whims.

Also, a green lightsaber but using an aggressive lightsaber form more fit for blue lightsabers, purely to throw off my enemies (Get fucked Darth Maul, gg no re).

Why the fuck did every lightsaber company take down their online 3D builders? I want to design my own double hilt.

>>719942470 (OP)
We like older evil women

>>719944983
Yeah I'd fuck Kreia. I'm afraid she'd like, snap her fingers and explode my prostate though.

>>719944937
>he canoncially lives off his own self loathing and his only enjoyment in life is when gets to make other people suffer more than he does

Start a new path of jedi. The Goons. We use the force to lift up shirts and skirts in public, make big tits wobble. The ultimate power is force penis.

>>719945035
this fr

Why does Obi flirt with his female enemies though? He has zero reason to.

SPONGEBOB MRS. PUFF NEEDS A NEW FUR COAT
...
YER SPENDING ALL ME MONEY BOY

Most people on /v/ would join the Dark Side because as much as they want to believe that they're the good guys, all they really want is the power to kill everyone who has ever slighted them, and force the world to be the way they want it to be, regardless of what anyone else wants.

>>719944256
No it was Anakins refusal to listen. If he had followed Yodas advice of being able to let people go his visions would never have come true. His refusal to allow the force to continue as it does wich is what he was thaught his entire life is what doomed him. Obi Wan meanwhile never refused the forces call thats why Anakin could never beat him cause you cannot beat the force you can merely rebel until it inevitably kills you or you learn your place and work for it again.

>>719944908
>no, the empire isnt actually retarded!
>yes, they are a deeply corrupt military junta
>yes, they think that creating a terror regime and committing mass murder on your own planets (alderaan) wont lead to massive unrest and further insurgency
>No, the empire MUST be highly competent at counter insurgency AND being a highly stable society, because.... well they just must, ok????
Why does the empire attract such retards.

>>719945141
people should be ruled by their superiors

>>719945141
Based and correct but see >>719944964 joining the Sith is a mistake that will get you killed.

>>719944908
>logically they would win
The Empire is just a more militarized republic, the CIS alone would have rofl stomped the entire republic if it managed to remove Palpatines sabotage.

>>719945190
Right. You mean the same Yoda who wasn't thrilled with the fact that Obi Wan wanted to train him, the same Yoda who saw Anakin as a threat?

>>719944964
>I mean I use the Force as merely a tool
So a dark side user retard. You will inevitably end up the tool of the dark side just like everyone else who thinks they can not be part of the light side.

>>719942706
Most of /v/ has the sith mindset, they're just piss poor practitioners of it. They would be part of Sheev's voter base.

>>719945290
Yoda was ultimately right that Anakin should have let go rather than fight destiny, but that doesn't mean the council isn't retarded.

>>719944404
Who the fuck would want to be Vader? Dude lives in a literal robo prison of his own doing and it’s so painful to cope with that he has to make up another identity. Vaders existence is sad as fuck. You can’t ever love anyone because you’re horribly disfigured, you can’t even take over because the dude who tricked you into doing this to yourself could kill you without you even being able to put up a fight, nobody likes you, but they’re too afraid to say it, so they all just quietly avoid you. Your master is literally just waiting to find someone to replace you the first chance he gets because he views you as a failure, regardless of how powerful you are.

>>719944782
Anon, serfdom?
Do you really think a king wouldn't casually fuck some serf girls?

>>719945190
>All forms of life, precious to a Jedi are
>Even the smallest ones, believe that, I do
>However, rot in Tatooine for some reason that slave bitch must

>>719942470 (OP)
Red is my favourite colour so I'd have to join them. But I'd probably be relegated to ann inquisitor jobber and die to some youngling.

>>719945194
Because whether you want to admit it or not the real way to control humanity is not with fear it's not with do a little killing on the side. No.

The best way to control humanity is with absolute genocide. Vietnam wouldn't get so uppity if the STUPID AMERICANS full blown committed to a genocide. And then out of LOVE turned the entire land and territory that used to be Vietnam into an unlivable wasteland. But there are other ways to absolutely kill populations the Jews have mastered the art of Cost of Living is TOO High. So humans start reproducing less and automation ensures humans are depressed and demoralized so they start producing less life aka less reproduction.

Overwhelming humans into death or producing no families is the best way to control them. Humans are stupid shitty animals like that even if you don't want to admit it. And yes we ARE doing this the Jews won stop reproducing you gentiles for you have lost and Steven Spielberg is laughing at you all.

>>719945290
Yes that exact Yoda. The same Yoda who gave Luke the exact same advice and after Luke refused it he lost his hand. But do you know the difference between Luke and Anakain? Luke realised he was in the wrong and was willing to let go of not only his loved ones but also his own life to save the universe when he had no other choice. Put Anakin in the same position and he would choke a child to death if it meant he could dangle in the air for a few more seconds.

>>719942690
Light side users have to follow the will of the Force, but that requires you to have faith and not follow conventional logic, such as when Luke turned off his targeting computer and relied on the Force alone to make the Death Star shot. Dark Side users ignore the will of the Force and do whatever they want with it which is selfish and leads to being corrupted by power. It’s basically a metaphor for religion.

>>719945340
I refuse to lose Padme!

>>719942871
More like the Force was punishing the Jedi for arrogance and disobedience by raising up the Sith to kill all of them. Sort of like how God would bring in the Assyrians or the Babylonians to sack Jerusalem and enslave most of the Israelites whenever they started practicing idolatry.

The Jedi were following the rules of the order rather than the will of the force, and they were punished for it. The Sith were still evil though, they were raised up precisely because they were evil and would do horrible things to the Jedi and Republic. Then, when the Force was done punishing the Jedi, it killed the Sith.

>>719945328
>I mean I use the Force as merely a tool
>So a dark side user retard
No, it's different. Even Dark Side users believe the Force itself is the only thing that gives them power.
Put in human terms, I can do lots of things with a wrench, but I'll still beat the shit out of you without it.

>>719945430
its time for your meds, anon.

>>719945290
Both Yoda and Mace were right about Anakin but also because they made things difficult for him and antagonized or criticized him whenever they saw him. Imagine spending 10 years of your life as a slave on a desert shithole, under a flying space jew. Then leaving and enduring grueling mental and physical training to become a Jedi. Then becoming a famed, first participant in a war and being forced to lead men at the age of 19.

>>719945497
Sith aren't evil in the same way Jedi are evil, that's the moral of Episode 2 and 3. Evil is just a term to concatenate ideals whenever useful, what the Jedi call totalitarianism, the Sith call democracy. What the Jedi see as slavery, the Sith see as general feudalism. They had too much impact on the perception of goodness.

>>719945219
And it's adorable that you envision yourself as the superior one. You actually think that the bars on a tiger cage are there to protect the tiger, and that the tiger is you. How precious!

ALL YOU HAD TO DO WAS LET ME FUCK IN PEACE

>>719942470 (OP)
I'd live out in the space boonies and run a plantation with own personal army of droids to work the fields. I'd also have a harem of bothans, shistavanens, and Lurmen.

>>719944003
Don't want to sound like a weirdo, but where is she from?

>>719945804
non-canon, don't worry about it

>>719942690
The light side is slow, tedious, and often doesn't give you the result you want. You're at the complete mercy of the will of the force. You do whatever the force tells you, and only what it tells you. That's why the Jedi have such strict monastic life styles, the force only gives you your Jedi powers if you're enough of a celibate, chaste, monk, and even then it may not give you much at all if it doesn't feel like it.

Remember that only Obi Wan and Yoda became force ghosts, the rest of the jedi order just died.

Oh by the way, if anyone is still wondering 20 years later why Anakin choked the love of his life who was also pregnant at that moment, it's because George deleted a lot of Palpatine manipulation scenes where he was trying to imply she was fucking Obi-Wan on the side, adding to all the mindfuck he was already in.
>Because of Obi-Wan?
>LIAR! You're with him!
>You turned her against me!
>You will not take her from me!
Yeah. Now that makes sense.

>>719945634
>t. Anakin

>>719944003
>fat

>>719944569
No, they're worse. The force lets you sense and seek out other users intentionally if you want. Sheev would sense you acting a fool and send a hit squad to black bag you, because only he is allowed to act a fool with force powers.

>>719945190
>Yoda, if the jedi serve the republic, and the republic is against slavery, why haven't you guys freed all the slaves on Tatooine?
And then ~20 years later:
>Yoda, my dad asked me to team up with him and kill the emperor which would end this war, why did you guys lie to me and still insist that I should kill him?

>>719946197
>Yoda, my dad asked me to team up with him and kill the emperor which would end this war, why did you guys lie to me and still insist that I should kill him?
He never came to that conclusion. Well to be fair Luke just lost a fucking hand right before that. Not a great strategy to shock someone like that right before asking them to be reasonable.

>>719944424
You don't have to rape them. There are a lot of women who wiill throw themselves at men in power. Just have money and power, and some women will decide they need to have you (or more specifically the nice things that banging you will get them). Sure, they're basically just whores, but I don't think Darth Anon the Dictator cares too much about the moral questions here.

>>719946051
They go over this in the final trilogy with Kylo Ren and Rey.

Evil is just an excuse to be basic and instinctual: even if the instinct is honest and reliable. "Oops, I raged at my parents dying, I guess I'm evil now!"

>>719946329
>They go over this in the final trilogy with Kylo Ren and Rey
Yeah I didn't watch that shit. Fuck off.

>>719945804
AI, anon. And the creators name is literally on the picture

>>719946359
Frick!

Frickity fuck frick prick.

>>719946021
Yeah, I do t get why he removed all of this. Sad part is we’ll never get the full version of the movie now because of Disney.

Being gray force user is clearly the superior choice

>>719946470
Probably a runtime issue. It's a long movie.

>>719946021
>I turned to the Dark Side due to NTR
Makes sense

>>719946513
You'll be weak as shit compared to the other force users since you aren't in tune to the will of the force enough for it to give you powers, and you aren't evil enough to mind rape it into giving them to you.

>Yes, yes... I have indeed asked the galactic engineers to place my throne room directly above the new and improved Death Star's reactor with nothing in between save for some metal bridge with some railing
>Functionality over design is but a pitiful Jedi concept
>Nothing bad is going to happen, I have foreseen it

>>719945371
>Do you really think a king wouldn't casually fuck some serf girls?
Yeah I don't. The nobility of antiquity believed themselves to be a class above and beyond the regular peasantry, bestowed with the knowledge and breeding necessary to act as a leader class to the peasants. To fornicate with one below your station was to destroy yours irrecoverably, not just socially but your very lineage being soiled with ignoble blood.

I'm sure there are examples of random individuals who were too horny to care but it's not representative of the actions of the broader class at all, unlike how you are trying to characterize it.

>>719944014
There was an EU book that was literally this; I remember reading it. No idea what the name was, though.

>>719942470 (OP)
I just want zappy powers, fuck the swords n' shit, give me lightning and mind control powers an I'm gravy.

>>719946663
I love how all the stupid decisions in the empire can be traced back to Palpatine doing shit for the lulz because he thinks he has plot armor.

>>719945647
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YPx1kTveXpk

Reminder that Twi'leks (who suffer from being an easily enslaved -and malnourished as a result- race) think that being a fat fuck is a status symbol and are attracted to it.

Your chances of fucking one of these are not zero.

>>719942683
PULL UP ON YOUR PLANET
DEATH STAR DRIVE BY

>>719947045
ok so whats the drawback then? do they half a year long periods?

>>719945512
>All those "reaction" posts inserted randomly so you have to scan for the fucking post number they're reacting to, which is universally nowhere near the fucking reaction post, sometimes not even present at all
Solid gold content diminished by a fucking retard of a screencap editor

>>719945371
>Do you really think a king wouldn't casually fuck some serf girls?
Like the other anon said, Kings, and nobles in general, pretty much never did this. In fact, there were several large-scale rebellions throughout history that began over some nob thinking he could steal his serf's wives whenever he pleased. They were small communities. You couldn't really hide it. The upper class kept itself as separate from the peasants as was humanly possible, as a rule.
You should also consider the fact that they were all Christians who often genuinely believed that adultery would send you to actual Hell.

>>719947149
welcome to all screencaps

>>719942470 (OP)
Well yeah there's that but also blue alien chicks.

>>719947330
No, just yours, retard.

>>719942470 (OP)
Stop liking evil men

>>719942470 (OP)
Yes, the only dream I have in life is to becoming a saggy old man in robes cackling at the world.

>>719947449
lol calm down

star wars is fucking gay

>>719947530
baste

>>719948776
Why do you feel the need to reply? Your screencap sucks and I'm telling you as much. I'm not going to stand by and let you try to blanket assert that all screencap editors are as retarded as you are. Most aren't. Take your criticism gracefully, nigger.

>>719946663
The Emperor was drunk off his own hype. Even before the prequels you can tell it took decades of machinations and dark side study to make it all happen. He now had his 2nd Death Star, the means of recruiting the son of his aging, crippled apprentice and destroying the Rebellion RIGHT there in the palm of his hand. It was all there and he would've succeeded too if not for Luke, his friends and teddy bears with wookeie strength

>>719949546
pride cometh before the fall, time is a flat circle

>>719945114
It's just bants, m8

>>719946663
He probably overlooked that because he autistically focused in on making sure the hole to the reactor core didn't exist this time around.

Does anyone have that warhammer skaven image where they talk about morality being a weakness?
Thats exactly what I think of when I think of the sith and the dark side

Nah, I'd join for the evil women like Darth Talon.

Being a Sith sounds like too much baggage. It's really the hign IQ ones that survive the long run and even then they get fucked by the Jedi or whatever the force does to course correct. Would probably live longer being a footsoldier or officer.

>>719943269
gay

>>719950617
a man of culture

How could you have a functioning society ruled by an ideology that tells you to live off of anger and hatred and suffering.
Its comically evil.

>>719950951
That's a privilege for the sith. The rest are npcs who follow orders.

>>719942470 (OP)
>fight for the good guys
>experience comical amounts of sacrifice and misery and get maybe one or two decades of "peace" and "prosperity" (unless you're outside the galactic core in which case enjoy slavery and lawlessness) until Darth Shitsnack overthrows the government again
>fight for the bad guys
>watch all your friends die to spunky twentty-something heroes or your boss having a meltdown because his date blueballed him and force testicle imploding anyone whose name starts with B
I choose neither

>>719950684
Yeah it's a very high risk high reward ideology. And even the high IQ and successful ones can still fall (literally in Palps case) due to hubris, the cutthroat nature of another Sith, etc.

The only 2 Dark Lords of the Sith who survived this kind of fate that I'm aware of, are Revan (who flipped back to being a Jedi and ended up becoming a hero and having a family) and Vectivus (who died happily in his sleep surrounded by his family and loved ones).