Thread 721065912

The segment that destroyed the final fantasy franchise and possibly the entire GayRPG genre

>>721065912 (OP)
Conan is based

no idea what you're talking about

>>721065912 (OP)
XV became franchise top seller so more like no one cares for gaynan

>>721065912 (OP)
as a big fan since day one, he was absolutely right. XV starts with a pointless open world and takes literally 5 fucking hours until you get a chocobo to be able to roam around. you can see the game is undercooked in every corner.

>>721065912 (OP)
Kojimbo utterly destroyed even though he was part of the game lmao

>>721066010
>movie games

>>721066052
Conan O'Brien described his experience with FFXV as "an epic blue balls waste of time"

>>721066887
Who?

>>721066784
kek based

>>721066931
You'd know if you weren't a thirdie.

i remember how jarring it was to see these videos he did because its so rare to see someone so honest and blunt about how shit modern AAA games are. He's coming from the perspective of someone who probably grew up on arcade games and stopped playing after his teens too so his idea of what a game is is so foreign to what the modern slop has become.

>>721066952
Sorry I don't watch talmudvision

>>721065912 (OP)
>the feel when Conan whitewashed Pierre

>>721066968
>Conan
>Soulja Boi
Who are some other honest game joutnalists?

>>721065912 (OP)
2013 era was so good for video content about video games. Clueless Gamer, Achievement Hunter, JonTron, Dunkey, Inside-Gaming (and Funhaus starting in 2015), and I'm sure anons here can mention more.

>>721067197
Mega64

>>721067132
>Soulja Boi
I can only see that he now has a game console, what game review?

>>721067303
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=xSXofLK5hFQ

>>721067030
That's such a good name for it

>>721067467
Jon Blow never recovered from this

>>721067467
I wish i didn't ask
Youtube! Refund my time!

fucking moron and a pleb

>>721065912 (OP)
Final Fantasy had been headed for disaster for a very long time. Conan only called it how he saw it. And he was 100% right. Tell me one thing that went right with Final Fantasy after 12? It has been an all over the place clusterfuck of inconsistent, broken, mismanaged, half-baked ideas. The only way you would disagree with me is if you are an MMOtroon, and even then, you probably have a gorillion gripes of your own about how that has been going. Ever since the announcement of the Final Fantasy 13 Fabula Nova Chrystler Dodge Whatever series, everything has just been wrapped in unrecoverable development hell cycles. It all just needs to go. All of it. It's run on long enough. Let it burn. Let somebody else have a try. The same goes for this whole corporate HR shackled industry. They need to die, so they can shed the incompetence, the old do-nothings, the Indian outsourcings, the HR mandated females all like a god damn snake skin, and let something new be reborn from the ashes.

>>721068634
Having played 13, fabula nova crystalis was a good idea. I don't even know how you could have done 13 itself differently than hallway simulator when it was a story about fugitives from the law for 70% of its runtime. Its not like 10 isn't hallways either and people love that shit.

>>721068634
14 was the only title that somewhat rekindled my hope for the franchise but overall the former strengths of storytelling and narrative have only crawled back to being somewhat mediocre instead of stellar for the main entries, covered with a truckload of money and production value to somewhat try to distract from the shortcomings.
Main titles haven't been able to reach the heights of 4-10 yet and it's very doubtful the ever will again. There may be some good moments sprinkled in here and there but the overall package doesn't manage to measure up.

>>721066941
and he's in the game

>>721067030
Brownoid cope

>epic blue balls waste of time
in hindsight he was completely correct. 15 was garbage. What’s even more interesting is that THESE are the segments of the game they chose to show off. Like they couldn’t find any more fun parts lmao. How did nobody on the team realize 4 dudes in their 20s wouldn’t get giddy excited looking at a wedding dress in a shop window?

>>721066140
>it sold a lot so it MUST be good

>>721068634
FF is still somehow hobbling along on yje good will that 7-11 bought them. 13-16 may have finally killed that good will

>>721068771
>Its not like 10 isn't hallways either and people love that shit
It’s been 15 years how are we still having this same discussion? Yes technically you are correct but 10s hallways are different in the sense they are broken up with downtime ie shops, NPCs, towns, mini games etc. 13 you go from hallway to save terminal/shop to cutscene to hallway to cutscene to save terminal again. Even when anons claim it “opens up and gets good 25 hours in” it’s just the equivalent of 10s calm lands with some 12-esque hunts

>>721065912 (OP)
Redpill me.

The fact I can't play the lightning final fantasy to this day is why I boycott final fantasy. Give me my tomboy GF!

>>721070074
JRPG's were always a genre for the majority of gamers. The illuminati knew this was dangerous to their plans, so they brought licensed complaints to alienate white male gamers from enjoying them, solidifying their hold on the mass marketshare of Call of Duty fans.

>>721065912 (OP)
XV is the best selling FF in the US and the 3rd highest selling FF worldwide.Thanks Conan!

ff16 killed ff

>>721069801
its higher rated than xvi and 7rebirth on steam
higher rated than xvi on psn
so yeah
on top of its high sales that means its beloved while xvi isnt

>>721070654
That tweet mostly tells me a lot of people bought VII remake and got burned badly.

>>721066140
>best selling FF game
>still considered a flop by SE

>>721070051
My point is 13 is narratively a chase story for nearly the entire game. 10 has the cast under much less pressure so they could have been doing a standard ass FF adventure with an overworld and shit.

>>721070763
I think most people agree that making it a trilogy is dogshit
Also the first one was only middling
>>721070906
Every product is just Spirits Within because they can't control themselves

>>721070763
The actual reason is for 7rbs lower sales ff7r was ps4 and ff7rb was ps5
5m people bought 7r on ps4 in 2020, it sold 7m by sep 2023 and was 500k on pc at that point so ff7r sold about 1.5m on ps5 by then

around 2.5m to 3m people bought 7rb in 2024
so for people getting ff7rb its really only people who
A: have played ff7r and have a ps5
B: people who bought the ff7r/7rb bundle on ps5

in both cases its predominantly the 1.5m~ ps5 ff7r players going to 7rb, rather than the full 5m 7r players on ps4 going to ps5 for the follow up

I expect 7r3 to sell around 3m

with ff16 it was just shit and flopped

>>721066968
>He's coming from the perspective of someone who probably grew up on arcade games and stopped playing after his teens too so his idea of what a game is is so foreign to what the modern slop has become.
Nope, Conan simply didn't play games at all. His perspective comes from a complete outsider who never consumed vidya in his life.

>>721070906
SE said XV exceeded sales expectations and was profitable day 1, they literally extended its post launch support by 2 years solely due to fan demand for more content, which that bonus stuff only got cut short because the director left SE 2 years after release to start his own company

SE said XVI flopped

>>721068634
>after 12
lol

For me it is Conan getting freaked out by the death animations in that Tomb Raider game.

>>721066968
He has almost no videogame experience but can diagnose the issues with games better than most. It really comes down to the simplest questions and complaints
>why am I supposed to care about this
>why am I doing this
>when do I get to just play
>why is this part necessary
You can apply this to movies and books with similar questions and break down most shit writings and structure this way. Not small nerd quibbles but simple broad questions

>>721071127
eighth gen really is a zombie generation isn't it
people just can't be assed to buy the ninth, except for the Switch 2 I guess if that even counts as ninth gen

>>721067467
Better version
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gWqnz-7iQbY

>>721070943
I suppose but they could have easily added “resistance outposts” or small villages to stop by along the way to break up the chase. Being on the run means the characters never need to stop and eat and sleep?

>>721071347
i liked when he treated witcher 3 like an h game

>>721067467
dude was before his time but he didn't know

>>721071348
more devs need normalfags to come in and ask these questions
>dude this turtle takes 24 hours real time gameplay to kill!!
>why that’s dumb

What's killing FF and Square games in general is they take forever to come out and when they do they're mediocre.

>>721071440
It basically is a H game

>>721071492
>more devs need normalfags to come in
Absolutely fucking not.

>>721071689
Games need to be entertainment too anon. The problem is that games nowadays are catering to milennials who grew up in the 90s and 2000s thinking vidya should be more than books and movies because they got butthurt by Roger Ebert's comment and are now responsible for the pretentious take movie games have been doing for the past decade now.

>>721071689
I realized how dumb the average normalfag is after I hit post so I digress, to AN EXTENT they should take their opinions. It’s perfectly valid to think “why should I care” “why can’t I play yet” “this is boring” they seem like rudimentary complaints but are actually perfectly valid when PLAYING a videoGAME

B? won

>>721071962
I replayed 16 a year after the original release thinking I might appreciate it more but I actually hated it more lol. What a failure of a game on all fronts

>>721071628
He won.

>>721071850
Anon...

>>721072015
I really have no idea what some people love about XVI so much because I sure don't see it.

>>721071689
>Greg Coomer
He's just like me bros

>>721071850
NTA but you're obviously misunderstanding what he's saying. Normies may be able to provide good feedback for story (i.e. "this is boring, just let me play"), their feedback for gameplay can be shit and make the game worse, because normies are stupid and want everything on baby easy mode, while people who actually understand and appreciate the hobby see the value in challenge and resistance. So normie feedback isn't the silver bullet to game design

>>721070654
>Sales are now an argument as to the quality of something
Anon please, discource like this is how we get fucking endless Steam charts threads

>>721072564
>now
Did you just come out of a coma?

>>721071640
thing is the actual xv was only in dev for 3.5 years, it was a new game that reused scrapped concepts from what was previously versus13, but it isn't actually versus13
like how mother 3 on gba is not earthbound 64 even though it reused concepts
had versus come out it was gonna be a 2014 game and was part 1 of 3

now ff16 that actually took 9 years
ff7r took 7 years and 7r2 took 4 years, though it reuses a ton of 7r and xv assets

>>721072603
I should have said 'accepted argument'; they've always been a dogshit way to determine quality.

>>721067197
DSPgaming

>>721072564
XV is both higher rated than xvi on steam and psn and sold better than every ff on steam, every ff in the us and 3rd highest selling overall
at the rate xv is selling it will be the highest selling ff in a few years
ff7 currently at 15m and ff10 at 14m are the only ones ahead
xv was 10m in 2022, based on just steam salee alone it has gained 2 million more sales since then so is around 12m now minimum

>>721072674
this is cope because your shitty fave ff sold worse

>>721071689
>wel allowed a right turn at this junction, leading the player right back to where they began.
Why? For what purpose? Someone being retarded enough to be confused by it is inexcusable sure, but so is such pointless, time-wasting level design in the first place.

>>721072564
Sales represents a desire to purchase which represents appeal and thus perceived quality

>>721066010
It's funny to me that he doesn't play videogames at all outside of these skits, and yet he can always properly identify movie games and call them out for being complete shit.
A man who plays no video games has better taste in them than 99% of game journos.

>>721072564
xv won more awards than xvi
xv sold more than xvi (by 3x)
xv is higher rated than xvi on every platform that requires buying the game to review it (steam, psn)

you lost

>>721071492
Conan might not be a gamer but I don't think he's entirely a normalfag either. His sense of humor at least is pretty out there and his shows never got major mainstream success because they were always kind of weird. (no, that 2 month period where everyone watched him just to dunk on Jay Leno doesn't count)

>>721073135
>A man who plays no video games has better taste in them than 99% of game journos.
To be fair, his show won't disappear if he stops being given access to games, so he can just say whatever he wants about them, most ad revenue from journos comes from embedding countless ads about the current thing game being released, so they can't afford to criticize a game if it's bad or give low scores because they will lose their jobs.
I'd wager most journos know the games are bad, but they would never admit to it even at gunpoint for fear of losing their job, plus lots of them have ulterior political motives behind their scores that conan doesn't have.

>>721072840
>higher rated
>sold better
And yet it's a game that nobody fucking talks about. All that shit is meaningless to me. Especially in the modern age. It's all smoke and mirrors that the companies basically pay for to promote their product. And even if it was technically true, I'd chalk it up to video games just being more of a widespread hobby compared to how they used to be. Ten, twenty years from now, people will remember the real classics of media. I GURANTEE you that FFXV will be in the hearts and minds of literally nobody likes, save for one terminally autistic weirdo, and maybe some people that can only reference data from journalist rags that were ONLY KNOWN FOR PEDDLING SCUMMY LIES AND BULLSHIT.

>>721072126
Benedikta was really REALLY fucking hot with a sex voice and the kaiju battles were very pretty. Otherwise it was all trash

>>721066010
What other comfy gaming sessions does Conan have? I saw this one and Mario Kart.

>>721073376
Nobody talks about EITHER XV or XVI except the super autists obsessed with them. They're the same.

>>721073480
I remember there's one where he plays a WWE game where he creates a really messed up looking version of himself and then talks a bunch shit as he uses it to beat others up, it's really funny.

>>721073480
He immediately jumped on the sexualized death scenes in Tomb Raider 2013 that other paid outlets ignored or try to spin as some girlboss feminist shit. Later he interviewed the voice/mocap actress about it.

>>721072045
Problem is so many games have it so that when an NPC blocks a path you can't go through it until you do something else. Not everyone is a no life loser who just plays stealth game all the time, different games have different rules about this shit and this is why playtesters are so important so that pidgeon hole thinking sperg autistic developers get an outside perspective

>>721073586
I liked the characters in XVI other than the ayylmao. If they had dropped that retarded shit the game's story could have been salvaged. You still end up with weak DMC though, at the end of the day.

>>721073312
Is Conan worth watching now still?
I was watching old SNL yesterday and the only funny thing was adam sandwich going trick or treating, but I was laughing at him not his 'joke'

>>721072345
Normies unlike you probably have a job and lives

>>721065912 (OP)
Hes right. Final fantasy is garbage. I couldnt believe how laughably bad any of them were that i tried to play. Total junkers and punks of games.

>>721073349
He doesn't even need to be given access at all, the earliest skits he did where all completely independent, publishers only started attaching themselves to it later, and even then he was never scared of shitting on them.
You're right that his creative freedom means he can be more honest than most, but it's a bit tragic that one of the few people who will give unfiltered opinions on video games is a comedian who doesn't even play them outside of these videos.

>>721073480
The best episodes are the ones where he's playing with his staffers like >>721066784
Clueless gamer went down hill when it became more about the guest celebrity Conan got than the game.

>>721073932
XVI barely had anything you could call characters aside from Clive

to be honest even if final fantasy went back to turn based it's not like it wouldn't have long ass cinematics and non-gameplay

>>721073950
His travel show is funny but there's only like 6 or 7 episodes. His podcast I find pretty boring. he doesn't lean into his funny side anywhere near as much as he should in my opinion.

>>721067109
did he rape someone?

>>721065912 (OP)
>shits on the game while the developers are literally in the next room watching him play
Now that's based as fuck.

>>721074145
was Clive even a character though? Like how would you even describe his character/personality besided “gruff determined action hero man” he claims to love Jill more than life itself but they have NO INTERACTIONS that don’t involve speaking about the mission at hand

>>721073950
He mainly does a podcast now. The last time he did scripted comedy was hosting the Oscars.

>>721074145
You mean Cid?

>>721074308
the funniest part was he didn’t know and then had to do a walk of shame after the fact

xvi>xv

>>721074427
fuck guess my memory was hazy, but it’s still funny as fuck

>>721074362
>>721074204
What if I start on his show from 2010?

>>721074424
Cid should have been the protagonist. He was infinitely more likable than Clive. Benedikta shouldn’t have died so soon or should have eventually joined the party as a reluctant hero. Mid should have been Cid and Benediktas biological daughter. Instead the story was just shitty

>>721074537
anon I could also be misremembering. I just remember him being nervous about leaving the room because they were sitting right outside of it lol

>>721074308
The funniest part is the publisher paid him to play and make a skit for his show, and then he just shit all over the whole thing. Not the only time he pulled something like this either.

>>721074597
mid should have fucked off because she's annoying

>>721073960
Wow, they have jobs and shit taste. Good for them

>>721074595
A lot of it won't be that funny all these years later because it's grounded in whatever was happening at the time. If you want to get into Conan, watch the remotes he has on his youtube channel, he must have like 100 of them there and a lot are really funny, even the ones from the 90s. I recommend the one where he goes looking for a house to rent with Andy Blitz.

This thread has been touched by Bazzy's brown hands. Why is he being so low key though?

>>721072889
>>721073149
Barry, FFX sold like 8 million copies, the only one coping here is you because XV is actually dogshit.

>>721074595
i’m not really a fan of talk shows, but his Conan Without Borders series where he travels around the world is top-tier.

>>721065912 (OP)
Clueless Gamers were way better when he was using them as a vehicle to bully that white haired faggot producer like it was his gay little brother instead of shooting them with celebrities

>>721074691
True but she was hot

>>721075101
>>721074775
Tnx I'll give them a try

>>721070093
What's stopping you

>>721075183
There's a remote from way back in the day where Conan bullies that guy because he can't pee in a public bathroom with other people around kek

>>721075183
he released a new one for borderlands 4 and they left the game crashing on them in it, so that's pretty based.

>>721074595
His TBS-era writers aren't as funny, but I think funniest parts are ironically when the jokes bomb since Andy and him are really good at turning things around. Their live audience doesn't seem to be as sanitized and braindead as other talkshows so those jokes do bomb often.

>>721074775
Remotes that feature the staff are particularly funny, i.e. Jordan Schlasky. Even Clueless Gamer is mostly him ripping on that bley guy.

>>721075183
I like how he used to just start hitting Aaron if anything in the game displeased him as if it was Aaron's fault

>>721070763
FF7 Remake also released right at the start of COVID, so people had way more free time and were more likely to buy it.

>>721065912 (OP)
>when he was told SE marketing was in the very next room that he had to walk through to leave and that they heard everything

>>721071236
They also cancelled its DLC due to its flop status.

>>721074362
That video where he eats wings with hot sauce is pretty good.

>>721075331
Conan was so visibly done with the game when that happened, I wish he'd play more games and call out their bullshit

>>721075383
>bullies his employees in every episode
>most of them have worked for him for over 20 years
How does he do it?

>>721074145
>No cast of femboy faggots
>Barry sleeps

>>721076131
>bullies
it’s called banter

>>721073480
The Skyrim session.

>>721075725
The best part is that he said that was the most excitement he had since he started playing the game

conan does this shit all the time. Witcher 3, Death Stranding, this shit. There’s a lot of things about Final Fantasy to critique but focusing on this particular thing is just retarded

>>721066010
I respect him for at least jumping ship into the videogame industry before anybody else. As soon as GTAV released and outsold every movie ever made, a bunch of faggots from hollywood immediately came flocking over to get their piece of the cake. Conan at least was one of the first ones to acknowledge how successful videogames would become.
Other than that, he’s mediocre, like every other talk show host

>>721067467
Jon Blow never recovered from this

>>721071689
That’s just gamers in general. Some of them are just bafflingly fucking stupid

>>721072965
You really gonna make me whip out a food analogy?

>>721072965
Anything with mass appeal is often lacking in quality though because it has to be dumbed down to appeal to the lowest common denominator. Let's not pretend My Hero Academia is better than Legend of the Galactic Heroes.

>>721067467
God damn

>>721070717
i don't exactly want to defend 16, but you have to be an ostrich to think 15 is such an impressive game that it compelled everybody to buy it and praise it out of sheer excellence
it had stupid amount of marketing and was a proper new mainline final fantasy in a long time, people were starving for something that's not lightning sequels or a mmo fiascos
in vidya business, there is no indicator quite as effective as the quality of the previous title, so squeenix only really feels the feedback offset by 7 year long dev cycles
the only thing you'll hear about it nowadays is the nomura/vs13 shitflinging, god knows nobody actually talks about the circle combat

>>721073135
Forest for the trees. This is why playtesters and children are important, they are very blunt and driven by instinct. It's the same with animals. Beavers tend to build better and more sustainable dams than we can half the time. I used to be on the enthusiast side of this debate but honestly fuck them I hate them so god damn much they are so out of touch and it's no wonder they're autistic losers with no friends who want games to warp around their hyper specific tastes for everything to be a NES like challenge when those games were hard for the sake of it to increase playtime. It's seemingly unrelated but RWhiteGoose's rant about RNG echoes my sentiment and of course despite claiming to hate him the term RNG definitely stalled in usage after he shamed them into not being out of touch spergs with no empathy.

>>721072840
Pajeets like you are why the internet is so miserable

>>721078164
It seems like somewhere around 2010 we lost the nice middle ground between “autistically hyper focused git gud!!” and “press A to AWESOME!”

>>721077886
Don't forget that Noctis' game was one of those never ever games like Silksong, whenever when one of those releases there's usually hype for it. Especially with a mega IP like Final Fantasy.

Why are there like 34 FF games and how the fuck do you people keep up with them

>>721074145
His mother was the best voiced character in it and she is sorely wasted.
>>721074597
Cid should have at least been around for a little while after introducing Mid, maybe kill him off in front of her or something instead of going BEFORE I DIE CLIVE PLEASE TAKE CARE OF MY LUSCIOUS AND FERTILE DAUGHTER. It feels like a whole character dynamic was missing.

>>721076131
Apparently he's very nice off-camera, but I guess if you work with someone long enough you'd know how far you can rip into them. Like how Sona's been with him for 20 years despite the racist Armenian jokes.

>>721078328
Wonder what possibly could have been the cause of that....

>>721076131
Americans once again bemused by the concept of bantz

>>721078423
by being 34 years old but let’s be real, most FF “fans” have probably never even played 1-6 let alone any of the spinoffs. Crystal Chronicles in my opinion has the best art direction and OST in the entire franchise

>>721078485
They really did kill him off way to soon and it was especially bullshit after his death it’s like “oh hey I’m Mid your best friends daughter who he never even mentioned a single time!!”

XVI's 2nd time skip felt really fucking pointless, Jill didn't even get an aged up model. They really just wanted to make Clive older than old Noctis so they could say he was the oldest for the sake of it.

>>721079067
FF 1, 3 and 5 are basically all the same game anyway with the same plot. I don't blame people for skipping them

>>721079241
This is time skips in most Square games
>Accomplish nothing offscreen until you regain control again
Nier did this too